Okay, be forewarned: if the Senators win this game, this is going to be one hell of a cranky game diary. Yes, Gentle Reader, it’s been that kind of day at stately IPB Manor (read: the fridge is still not working, so we knocked ourselves out with a round of cable cars this afternoon).
We hoped for a pre-game show tonight, but who are we kidding? We instead got Billy Graham. Really, NBC?
Oh, yay! Bill Clement excitedly tells us there was “no way [he] would leave [his] buddies Brett Hull and Ray Ferraro at 30 Rock.” Come on, Bill, at least tell us you tried.
We go into commercial with the promise of a Prongsie/Pierre Maguire interview on the flip side. You know what we love about Pierre Maguire (yes, there is actually something we love about him…)? We love that, while writing game diaries of games on VS can be a lot of work, when he’s doing the NBC games these things write themselves.
Holy crap — NBC actually believes this theory that Americans can’t enjoy a sporting event if they can’t locate the city it’s being played in on a map and gives us, honest to God, a brief glimpse of a map of Canada. Seriously, NBC, no one in the States could tell you where Green Bay is, but no one has a problem watching games from Lambeau.
The promised Pronger/Maguire chat finally arrives, and we both kind of expect Pierre to be wearing one of Chris Simpson’s outfits. We are vastly grateful that he is not.
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A completely unexpected joy of blogging for us has been seeing the search terms people use to find IPB. Inspired by some recent discussion that we should be writing hockey-themed genre novels, we bring you, Gentle Reader, a catalog of IPB Publishing’s upcoming titles, as searched by, well… you. Seriously. Every one of these titles is an actual search term that hit IPB.
Mascot On Fire
After watching his hero, J.S. Giguere, being humiliated in Game 7 in 2003 by being forced to accept the Conn Smythe as a booby prize, the Anaheim Ducks mascot Wild Wing snaps. With his psyche bruised by a constant mental loop of Giguere blubbering through his tear-soaked beard, Wing quits his job, leaves his wife, and disappears into the lawless frontier of the Sonoran Desert in Mexico. There he decides to lead a one-mascot murderous rampage against a group of native sustenance farmers, and his reign of terror almost wipes out the entire society of peaceful agrarians. Finally one young man steps up to lead the community to battle against the rapacious Wild Wing, and they turn to the only soldier of fortune willing to provide help in this godforsaken, hardscrabble wilderness: Youppi! Because the only way for these innocent and hard-working farmers to save themselves and their way of life from this criminally deranged plush creature is to fight fire with fire… Mascot On Fire, that is.
This children’s book teaches young readers (age 4-6) valuable lessons about the risks of diving when you’re the last line of defense for the Detroit Red Wings. With its colorful watercolor illustrations and florid Czech prose, this is sure to be a favorite addition to every child’s personal library.
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