The 39th in our 118-part series.
Being Hockey Fans
The other night on “The Daily Show”, in a report on the Iraqi national soccer team, John Oliver quipped, “I’m a soccer fan first, and a person second.” This rang so true with us, being that we consider ourselves hockey fans first and human beings second. Being hockey fans means we’re a part of a really cool community of sports fans who aren’t afraid to swim against the currents of the mainstream sports scene. We’re members of an exclusive club of people who get it. Yeah, yeah, this is a pretty conceited and self-referential reason to love hockey, but the fact is we like that, here in the States at least, being a hockey fan means being willing to take the effort to find coverage of your sport, and to find other people who get it. Sure, that means hassling with VS, dealing with NBC cutting away from playoff games, and seeing more and more newspapers dropping hockey writers left and right, but that just makes the rewards of being a fan that much sweeter.
Jon Oliver is quickly replacing Lewis Black as my favorite Daily Show contributor.
I think it has to do with his Britishness.
being a hockey fan means being willing to take the effort to find coverage of your sport,
I miss being in Canada for this very reason :(. I walked in 40++ degree c weather to a sports bar here in hopes for hockey coverage. I begged my cousin to bring his laptop to a family dinner (and got yelled at). (as a side note, what is Kevin Lowe thinking?!)
I really, really like the new IPB :D
Hi Vinny!
I have to admit that along with my incredulous disbelief that not everyone LOVES hockey, I feel quite smug. Not everyone likes hockey, because not everyone is as cool as me.
Hi Vinny! Welcome back! (You ask what Kevin Lowe’s been doing? He’s been proving that when you go away, all hell breaks loose! :P)
I feel quite smug. Not everyone likes hockey, because not everyone is as cool as me.
Exactly! And I’d say I don’t want to have that stupid, hipster mentality, but I can’t help it. Along with being a strong, independent woman of the 90′s, I am a smug, lazy, self-referential child of the 80′s.
Josh, there are times when I think John Oliver is tapped directly into my brain to find the jokes that will make me laugh the hardest. His humor and delivery are just a direct bulls-eye to what I consider the pinnacle of humor. And the british accent and dimples don’t hurt at all!
Good morning, IPB! I’m stuck here at work and need entertainment! It seems I missed quite a comment thread last night. Three thoughts:
1. If someone like Lou can forget to make qualifying offers to Madden and Raflaski, I can entirely believe that Burke didn’t realize he could take Penner to arbitration.
2. Anyone sports fan who hasn’t seen the Harold Lloyd movie where he plays college football, must. Even if you don’t like football.
3. There are few things on Earth that made me happier than witnessing Schnookie’s first taste of the Keystone Kops. They made a guest appearance in some Sunday Silent on TCM and it featured a chase scene. One by one each Kop fell into a trough of water. And each time Schnookie laughed like it was the most hilarious thing that had every occured throughout all time. She was really born at the wrong time.
I don’t catch the “Daily Show” often enough to really know what John Oliver is all about, but the other day I saw him in a segment trying to imitate Demetri Martin, and it was hilarious! I’ll have to hit up YouTube and see if I can dig up more. (Incidentally, remember how I said Michael Ian Black is my comedian husband? Well, Demetri Martin is my comedian hot little thing on the side. I saw him live when I was in Scotland two years ago and I swear I’ve never laughed so hard in my life. Schnookie, if John is tapping into your brain, then Demetri is definitely tapping into mine. It’s like his jokes were invented just for me! Plus, his desperately adorkable.)
By the way, there’s nothing I love more than being a self-congratulatory hockey fan! No one is as cook as we are, indeed.
Demetri Martin is so effin’ funny! My favorite thing he ever did on a Trendspotting segment was when he visited a “life coach”, and in a sit-down with the coach he started with a few “Finish this sentence…” questions, then said, “Start this sentence.” Hee hee! Anyway, we sing “Trends!” so often at IPB Manor it’s just really not funny at this point. But we laugh every time anyway. (And yes, Demetri is practically the epitome of adorkable.)
In your searches of YouTube for the best of John Oliver, be sure to check out the Civil War reenactment piece he did in which he broke his nose.
Hockey fans are the cookest! Everyone else is just stupid!
1. If someone like Lou can forget to make qualifying offers to Madden and Raflaski, I can entirely believe that Burke didn’t realize he could take Penner to arbitration.
Today starts my campaign: “Hire me, Burke. I’ll turn on the internet for you!”
By the way, there’s nothing I love more than being a self-congratulatory hockey fan!
I am the best, aren’t I? Especially in SoCal, because we are so rare, I can meet a hockey fan for the first time and it’s almost like we are immediate best friends–like freemasons, but with a longer offseason.
In your searches of YouTube for the best of John Oliver, be sure to check out the Civil War reenactment piece he did in which he broke his nose.
This isn’t on You Tube, but is on Comedy Central.
LINK HERE FOR VIDEOS
Click on “War: What’s It Good For? Part 1″. I just turned it on, muted, to make sure it was the right one, and even without sound I was laughing hard enough people here at work were looking at me funny.
I also love Demitri Martin. I wish he were on more often.
Earl, I think promising that you’ll turn on the internet is a sure-fire way to guarantee that Burke will never hire you. I mean, he is a Lamoriello fan, and if there’s one thing Lou doesn’t trust, it’s computers.
I can meet a hockey fan for the first time and it’s almost like we are immediate best friends–like freemasons, but with a longer offseason.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
And so true! When we were nervously anticipating our recent spate of blogger meet-ups, we finally calmed ourselves by saying, “They’re hockey fans. How can we not have plenty to talk about?”
like freemasons, but with a longer offseason.
I think we need to come up with a secret handshake for Ottawa ’08, so we’ll be able to tell that the person hiding behind that plant is indeed one of us.
It’s been brought to my attention the correct John Oliver video is “War: What’s It Good For? Part 2″. Sorry! I’m sure Part 1 is funny, too, though.
I think we need to come up with a secret handshake for Ottawa ‘08, so we’ll be able to tell that the person hiding behind that plant is indeed one of us.
We’ll need signet rings, too!
My favorite thing he ever did on a Trendspotting segment was when he visited a “life coach”, and in a sit-down with the coach he started with a few “Finish this sentence…” questions, then said, “Start this sentence.”
I’ve seen that clip at least three hundred times…it’s brilliant.
And I have actually seen the Civil War Reenactment, that one was hilarious too [but sadly not enough to completely convince me of Jon Oliver. I'll try harder next time I promise!]
We’ll need signet rings, too!
Oh don’t you worry, I’m working on t-shirts right now: “IPB Draft Convention ’08– Now With More Hobo!”
Good morning, IPB! I’m stuck here at work and need entertainment!
Here’s one of my Mr. Show favorites, if you’re bored. Also good is “The Audition” or “Monster Parties”.
I’ll have to check out the Mr. Show clip during lunch when I can watch video with the sound up.
Pookie, I usually online shop when I’m bored at work [without actually buying anything, of course]. I’m browsing the Zappos.com link Genna posted yesterday looking at cute shoes I can’t afford.
Usually I go to yahoo games and play something except our computers in the office are a million years old and don’t have the right java plug-in or something so I’m stuck with 3-D pinball…which I’m proud to say I officially have the top score of over 6,000,000. Whoo!
Pookie, I usually online shop when I’m bored at work [without actually buying anything, of course].
That’s a great idea! Now I just need to think of what to shop for…
Haha, well maybe start with Amazon.com? That sort of has everything…if you want something that’s more sports-paraphernalia related I suggest River City Sports:
http://www.rivercitysports.com/US/
Ooh, I love River City Sports! I tend to get disappointed when looking at it, though, that the Devils seem to have a rule against making nice t-shirts.
Aww, that sucks Pookie.
The Ottawa Senators section for women’s clothes is rather unimpressive as well. I really want an Alfie number and name t-shirt except they only have one for Spezza in women’s sizes. I wouldn’t mind wearing a men’s cut except I’m like, short.
Riddle me this, Batman, why do they have all kinds of nice looking t-shirts for all the defunct teams except the Whalers? The Whalers were a Reason I Love Hockey! Surely that’s enough to justify someone, somewhere making me a t-shirt!
I have to say, the Peter Puck shirts are pretty darn cool, but Peter Puck was before my time. Because I have no idea what the deal is with it, I find myself assuming it was like a cuter version of Fox Traxx (in that it was insulting to real fans). Am I right?
Eeeeee! I just realized River City Sports has the absurdly priced Sabres hoodie I’ve been dying for at a reduced price. Thanks for making me decide to check it out, guys :-)
I’m glad you found the hoodie you’ve been dreaming of Heather. Yeah, thanks for the suggestion, Sherry! This is easily going to kill an hour or two as I continue to click on the Roger Edwards shirts, hoping that at some point, one will turn into a Whalers shirt. Of course, I started looking at this all with the assumption that I was just looking. But the more I just look, the more I remember how last Winter I really wished I had one or two more long-sleeved t-shirts…
Of course, I started looking at this all with the assumption that I was just looking.
Yeah, this is why I can’t shop online out of boredom. I’m usually pretty good about not spending money I don’t have but it just pisses me off that I don’t have any money. But seriously, that hoodie. I’m all over it. Hoodies are my favorite and it has the vintage logo! Eeeee!
I only just got a hoodie for the first time and cannot wait — simply CANNOT WAIT — for it to be cool enough to wear it. I see it hanging on its hook every night and I whisper softly to it, “Don’t worry, Hoodie, it’ll be Autumn soon enough”. Sweet, sweet Hoodie.
Surely that’s enough to justify someone, somewhere making me a t-shirt!
I don’t know, Pookie! That just seems too wrong and discriminatory.
And I too was after Peter Puck but he does seem absolutely cook.
I’m so glad you found the hoodie you wanted, Heather B. One thing I love about River City Sports is the fact that they always have some sort of sale going on and they have a lot of items you can’t find on shop.nhl.com
“Don’t worry, Hoodie, it’ll be Autumn soon enough”. Sweet, sweet Hoodie.
I love hoodies too, I love layering them underneath a blazer or something, I think it looks absolutely cook. I recently ordered a new Team Canada hoodie from River City and I can’t wait until it gets here.
OK, I think I’m done looking through River City. It seems so wrong that the CFL merchandise is so much cooker than the NHL stuff. I’m probably going to go against my plan of not spending money on new clothes by buying 2 new shirts tonight. Thanks, Sherry!
If I cared about the CFL, I’d be all over that stuff!
Anyhoos, MamaScarlett is making me go shopping with her, meaning I’ll be gone at least 4 hours and come back crankier than usual :P Online shopping is so much better!
Hope you guys have a good day, try not to get too bored at work Pookie!
Bye, Sherry! Have fun shopping with Mama Scarlett!
I love River City Sports! I got an absurdly expensive (but less so there) Oilers hoodie from them last spring and despite the fact that it’s HUGE it’s probably the most comfortable thing I have ever worn. But I’m generally in love with hoodies and I tend to think that about all my new ones until I get the next one.
Okay, I just spent 90 minutes breaking in my new kitchen (sauteed some rainbow chard with garlic, boiled up some beets and corn zippered my way through twelve ears [four cups of which is now in the freezer]) — since I’m enjoying the benefits of spending all that money on the remodel, now I need to go see what I can spend money on at River City! (I realized a few days ago when everyone was complaining about the NHL store that I’ve only ever ordered sweaters from River City…)
That all sounds so good! I am in desperate need of running out to the grocery store and stocking up, here, because I have next to no food except what I bought to make wraps the other day. Have I complained yet about the lack off fresh markets here? Or the lack of little side-of-the-road tiny markets in the residential districts like we have back home? NO ONE wants me to get cheap fresh produce!
And I’ve been trying to stay away from River City because after the money spent on that jersey and the money being imminently spent on a plane ticket, the last thing I need is to fall in love with something else :P I’ve been looking at those boot sites Genna showed me to placate my need for online shopping though – and can I tel you how much I want these? So cute!
Steph, those boots are adorable! I’d totally get those.
It’s been a long time since I’ve spent anything on hockey logo-ed apparel. I think it’s time to remedy that.
Today has been a veggie bonanza. With our fridge blinking in and out, and having no room in the mini-fridge, and having no space in the kitchen to work with, I’ve been neglecting our farm share bounty. Today it was really nice to get to catch up a bit! (And I can’t believe how fresh the new fridge is keeping everything. I’ve got spring onions in there that are just as sprightly now as they were two weeks ago when they got tossed in the crisper drawer.)
I am torn between those and these (though I’m not sure in which color, hmm…) but I have 17 more pages to go through! It’s like neverending boots.
Haha I wish our fridge would do that! I mean, it functions as well as one could expect any old apartment fridge to do, but seeing as how I can’t buy things in reasonable amounts most of the time (damn you lack of fresh markets yet again!), I end up with lots of leftovers that my roommate doesn’t really touch (he’s a macaroni and hamburger helper kinda guy) and they always go bad. And throwing away half a bundle of spinach, even if it was only 99 cents is so sad.
Those boots are awesome, Steph! I vote for the first ones over the second.
I vote for the second ones over the first! Those boots ROCK.
Throwing away what was once nice produce is so hard. We have this massive farm share because we like getting reams of some of the veggies (potatoes, tomatoes, onions, etc.); we end up then with way more greens than we could ever eat (as many as eight heads of lettuce a week). I felt so guilty about tossing it until we started composting. Now I’m like, “No, it’s better for me to throw this stuff out than to eat it!” Of course, composting in an apartment seems a bit difficult… :P
I think I do too…I mean come on they’re so cute and plaid! (And like five whole dollars cheaper!)
But then, the second ones are so bright and fun…gah! Decisions! I’m already taking back what I just said!
Plaid + $5 cheaper = better choice
The thing I’ll say about the boots, Steph, is that the second ones look cook from all angles. The first ones look more staid from most of the angles. I liked them best, but then when I did the “View from All Sides”, I see why the second ones might be more fun. I also really like the black and blue colorway.
Of course, composting in an apartment seems a bit difficult… :P
In my old apartment, I had a roommate once who um, never cleaned anything. Even before she had me around to do it – her laziness was astounding; once she blew up at me for not washing a pan she’d asked me to before leaving for the weekend (I could have easily done this but I was not feeling very generous as EVERY dishes in our kitchen was PILED UP IN OUR SINK). Her big problem with lack of pan-washing, though, was that, because I didn’t wash the pan, she had to order pizza instead of cooking and spend money she ‘didn’t have’. And then to top things off, because she left the pizza out and open on the stovetop instead of putting it away, the cats knocked it on the floor and made a mess. God. I am such a bad roommate.
Anyway the point of that story being once I cleaned out our fridge when she was home and we had a drawer full of liquid lettuce and some other unidentifiable green things. Does that count?
Thanks for the River City Sports link. I like the Don Cherry travel mug, but I need another travel mug like I need a hole in the head.
Steph, those plaid boots are so cute!
Steph, that’s awesome! What a crappy roommate! Was her name “X” by any chance?
Hahaha you guys are not helping! Actually I think I’m still leaning a little toward the plaid ones because I’m leery of buying anything with a heel that I can’t try on first. But then again, those look pretty innocuous…
Plaid, plaid, plaid, plaid!
I like the Don Cherry travel mug, but I need another travel mug like I need a hole in the head.
Oh my god that is what my dad is getting for his birthday this year. Wow.
Plaid, plaid, plaid, plaid!
Okay, okay!
Speaking of breaking in new kitchens, I was going to make this pasta recipe my mom gave me and I failed to find smoked Mozzarella. Is that typically hard to find? I’ll try the Central Market next, but if they don’t have it I won’t know where to try after that.
I just stopped in to say how desperate I am for hockey season to come back: My friends invited me to the circus of all things, and I was struggling to think of a polite way to pass on that, when I realized it’s at the American Airlines Center. I miss the AAC! So I’m going. Sheesh.
In my old apartment, I had a roommate once who um, never cleaned anything.
Steph, is this by any chance the same roommate who left all her furniture behind and then decided she wanted the microwave back? Was that you? Because she sounds like a real winner! And if you’re still taking votes, I like the first boots better. The green on the second choice is just not my kind of color though.
My dress code at work is pretty casual so I live in hoodies during the winter. It’s the next best thing to going to work in your pajamas because a good hoodie is just so darn comfortable. (And seriously, the Sabres hoodies was $27 cheaper! I couldn’t not buy it!)
And now I’m looking at boots. Mark might not be happy when he gets home later :-)
Steph, is this by any chance the same roommate who left all her furniture behind and then decided she wanted the microwave back? Was that you? Because she sounds like a real winner!
Yes! Same girl!
And if you’re still taking votes, I like the first boots better. The green on the second choice is just not my kind of color though.
They also come in black, but if I were to get them I think I’d go all out and get the obnoxious green. I’m leaning toward the plaid though, they’re just so cute!
Steph, your roommate sounds like a dream! When we first moved in with X the arrangement was that we set a weekly budget, ponied up a third of it each, and then I did all the grocery shopping and cooking. Every night she’d get home from her commute into the City and I’d have dinner waiting for her. One day she decided that was too demanding and rigorous for her (the actual quote was, “I don’t see the benefit in it for me”) and asked to be extricated from the arrangement. She proceeded to spend the rest of the time we lived together complaining when she got home from work that the only things she had to eat were microwave popcorn and potato chips. We’d stare at her over our bowls of caramelized onion risotto and be like, “Huh. So sad.”
Patty, I LOVE that you’re going to the circus because it’s at the AAC! Of course, it’s always so heartbreaking to see a hockey building without hockey in it. It seems sacreligious.
As for smoked mozzarella, I actually think I have an easier time finding fresh and buffalo mozzarella than I do smoked. Which seems weird. But if it’s not too tricky to find, I bet it’s well worth the hunt!
(By the way, I’m doing a mini-pommerdoodling here — fallen chocolate souffle cake: in the oven! Potatoes for gnocchi? Out of the oven. It’s like a cooking factory in there!)
Sounds delicious, Schnookie!
Our new refrigerator (that I didn’t know my parents bought!) is being delivered right now. My mother is pommerdoodling over it, since it has a freezer on the bottom.
Heather, it sounds like a good shopping day over at stately B. Manor! I am only a recent convert to hoodies, but I’m not sure I can swing them at work. What I can get away with, though, is fleece. Like, those L.L. Bean v-neck fleece “sweaters” and the kicky little vests. After a hoodie, those are probably the next best thing to pajamas! (A friend of mine made the single greatest find in the history of business casual, though: wide-wale corduroy draw-string pants. So they looked like business casual, office-appropriate slacks, but in reality they were just sweats! I have no idea where she got them, but those are like the Holy Grail of clothing as far as I’m concerned.)
Oh my god you guys. Oh. My. God. Wrench thrown in the boot-buying operation. Tell me I want tall boots and not to get suckered in by the AMAZING.
Haha wow, that sounds like something this girl would have done too. I was always cooking fancy things and she pretty much…lived off of spaghetti. When she wasn’t buying dinner every day on her way home from work and then complaining that she didn’t have the money to pay things like our cable bill.
And you’re making me really want to cook! (Although, I should be working on dinner and what I really want is to try those muffins you guys posted a while back.)
Amy — bottom-freezer fridges rock! I was so excited when we got our first one, and it was like, “Holy crap! I don’t have to bend over to get anything out of the fridge anymore!”
Of course, it’s always so heartbreaking to see a hockey building without hockey in it.
After thinking about it, that might just be the case. I’ll have to close my eyes and try to pretend I’m hearing skates and sticks and beer vendors.
Steph, if you do decide to give those muffins a shot, the recipe is here.
And I like the first two boots more than those most recent ones!
I think your roommate and X went to the same roommating school. When X was feeling especially culinarily inclined she made spaghetti, with sauce from a jar and some sauteed mushrooms and zucchini. Like, every night. So after we moved out, we ran into her at a game and she said, “I’ve been doing so much cooking now! I made this really great dish where I took a little jarred pasta sauce, sauteed some mushrooms and a bit of zucchini, and then tossed it all with corkscrew pasta!” Really? Did you just invent that recipe? Because I think I saw you eating it for the ENTIRE YEAR WE LIVED TOGETHER. (Which was actually only 9 months because we broke the lease rather than stay together any longer than that.)
Steph, you really want tall boots. Tall, plaid boots.
I never, ever get tired of crazy ex-roommate stories. Even now, 4 years later, Schnookie and I constantly remind each other — “NEVER FORGET!” — never forget how awful it was living with a crazy person. Every now and then I wish Schnookie would give me the silent treatment for no good reason (like the time X blamed us for the NYC blackout and thus didn’t speak to either of us for days) just to remind me what it was like.
Thanks Schnookie! I usually have made about five or six loaves of zucchini bread by this time in the summer and this year I’ve got nothing, so I’m really excited.
The first two pairs are definitely cuter but the third have Space Invaders! I think it’s going to come down to that I do want taller ones than that, but I’m having a hard time fully convincing myself that Space Invaders on my boots isn’t awesome.
And that is exactly what this girl would do! Only she’d take pasta sauce from a can, add a ton of basil to it and claim each time that it was more delicious than the last time. Um, I love basil but there is nothing fantasticly original about some noodles with basily tomato sauce on them.
Steph, you’re starting to scare me. Was your roommate by any chance a thirtysomething legal secretary who refused to consider buying her own home because she didn’t want to be “that woman who owns her own house and lives with her cats”? (And yes, X would declare each iteration of that same meal extravagantly more delicious than the last time she’d made it. I don’t want it to sound like I’m pooh-poohing that she at least took the initiative to dress up some jarred sauce, because I certainly do that from time to time, but to exalt over it every night?)
Um, I love basil but there is nothing fantasticly original about some noodles with basily tomato sauce on them.
Tell me when someone made something more original that noodles with basily tomato sauce on them! TELL ME WHEN!
Another one of X’s signatue lines that never fails to crack me up is “God, you act like I’m never going to pay you back!” She, uh, never paid me back. For anything. At least not without a fight.
I never, ever get tired of crazy ex-roommate stories.
Me either! My other favorite thing about Dena was that she was completely Harry Potter obsessed – to the point where she was also completely obsessed with England, as were all of her friends. So at any given time I was walking around our apartment I’d hear all about snogging some boy at his flat (which was another thing, no day was complete without her feeling sorry for herself over wanting a boyfriend). I never want to hear British slang again for as long as I live.
Oh. My. God. The fake Britishisms! And to think — they stemmed from a Harry Potter obsession, of all the stupid things! I mean, I get the obsessing over Harry Potter, and getting into the whole magic/fantasy/boarding school thing, but to have it escalate to the point where you’re pretending to be British? It just… lame.
Steph, that is indeed one of the lamest things I’ve ever heard. I think “snogging” is an adorable word but I’m not going to walk around saying it.
What the heck is with all the weird piping and lining on the new jerseys? I hate them! And why is there so much design UNDER THE ARMS? Our boys are all going to be ugly next year.
EW! Heather, you’re right — those are SO UGLY. (Looking on the bright side of these new sweaters, for those of us planning to take on a lot of game diarizing this season, at least it will give us something to talk about during slower moments at the start of the season…)
Another one of X’s signatue lines that never fails to crack me up is “God, you act like I’m never going to pay you back!” She, uh, never paid me back. For anything. At least not without a fight.
Hahaha I’m starting to get scared too. Of course Dena never actually said anything like this because I’m pretty sure she swore by the idea that once something was paid for, she never had to worry about it again regardless of who paid it. My personal favorite was when she came into my room with two months (one now profoundly late) of our inanely expensive cable/internet bills, tossed them on my bed and said “Um, I don’t have the money to pay these, so you have to just do it for now okay?” The day after she moved the digital cable box into her bedroom (“because it works better with this tv and the other one is too heavy to go on my desk”). It might also be worthwhile to mention that I never once could actually connect to the internet we were paying $50 a month for.
but to have it escalate to the point where you’re pretending to be British?
She got obsessive too, downloading all these British sitcoms and TV shows and whatnot (although I admit, The Mighty Boosh was fun, but still). Her rich aunt and uncle are taking her (Taking! For free! After she spent a whole semester whining about how I could do SOMETHING around the apartment since I wasn’t working because my parents “gave” me all the money I needed [read: I earned scholarships] and thus I didn’t come home from work so exhuasted every day) to London this summer and I’m afraid of what she’ll come back like.
And why is there so much design UNDER THE ARMS? Our boys are all going to be ugly next year.
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS EITHER! It’s like someone was sitting around wondering where the most useless place for elaborate design could be.
EW! Heather, you’re right — those are SO UGLY.
I’ve already forgotten whose jerseys I was looking at when I wrote the original comment but there weird lines all over the place and they don’t seem to serve any purpose. They’re just there.
You guys are killing me with these roommate stories! I’m kind of sorry I got married so young now. I totally missed out!
Steph, the Sabres jerseys last year were like that. There’s nothing on the front of the jersey except for the ugly logo – nothing. A lot of empty, solid space. But then the guy lifts his arms to celebrate a goal and all of a sudden there’s color and designs galore. What the heck?
Well I know I’ll never have to worry about this, seeing as the goal of our jerseys is to incorporate as much red as possible while being entirely plain and uninteresting (but having a kickass logo).
But seriously who is advocating these things?
But seriously who is advocating these things?
I can’t think of a single person who likes them. Now, I am a card-carrying member of Uni Watch Nation, which makes me a certifiable curmudgeon, but still — all the bells and whistles going under the arms? WHY???
I am also very, very afraid that they’re going to bastardize the Devils sweaters this year. The thought of the horizontal stripes going away just makes me want to cry.
My favorite X story is a little convoluted, but I can’t resist trying to recreate it. The place we shared had an attic room that we never went into. One Saturday, at about noon or so, Schnookie and I realize that there’s a bird trapped in that room. It’s flying around, making a racket, pooping on the stuff stored up there (including a large collection of hockey sweaters and some game-used sticks). X is still asleep, and we knew, would likely remain so for another 3-4 hours. So we go up together and spend an hour trying to coax the bird out. In the process we make a giant racket right over X’s bedroom, but there’s no sound of her stirring. Huh. Anyway, the bird is dispatched, we settle back into our routine of wondering how much longer we have to put with her, and the finally, she staggers downstairs.
Me: Gosh, X, sorry if we work you up trying to get that bird out of the attic.
X: You didn’t wake me up. I didn’t hear anything.
Schnookie: Huh. Well, there was a bird in the attic. We got rid of it.
X: Oh. I’m going to make some pasta with sauce and sauteed zucchini.
Now, Schnookie and I come from a culture of gratitude. We thank each other, and others, for everything. Someone cooked dinner? Thanks! Someone cleaned up dinner? Thanks! Someone took the recycling out? Thanks! Someone said, “Thanks”? Thanks! So it was really odd to us that she not only didn’t seem concerned that there was a live animal trapped in our house, but also didn’t seem inclined to thank us for taking care of it so she didn’t have to. Moreover, we’re so inclined to thanking and be thanked, that we’d had a long-running joke that if you did something that you felt went unappreciated, you’d loudly thank yourself for doing it. If I took the recycling out and thought no one noticed, I’d say, “Thanks for taking the recycling out!” And then I’d get a chorus of sheepish, “Thanks, Pookie, for taking the recycling out.”
So that evening, I complained about it on the phone to a distracted Boomer, who in a knee-jerk reaction countered with a sheepish, “Oh, thanks for getting the bird out of the attic!” I thought it was so freaking funny that we got more gratitude from someone who didn’t live in the house than we did from X. It was so funny that I decided to tell X, leaving out the bit where I was complaining about her. X’s reaction?
X: Huh. There was another bird in the attic?
She was just that clueless. Now whenever one of us feels like we’ve done something that hasn’t been appreciated enough we’ll say in an exasperated tone, “Thanks for getting the bird out of the attic!”
I cannot figure these new jerseys out. They’re so bad I don’t even want to call them sweaters. Is there a single hockey fan who wants to see them? The only good thing about them at all was the video footage of Marty Turco’s quip about the mannequins at the uniform unveiling. On paper it was a riot. But in video? It has the added hilarity of a really tired Sid looking listlessly around for the Staal brothers before realizing it’s a joke.
Schnookie and I come from a culture of gratitude. We thank each other, and others, for everything. Someone cooked dinner? Thanks! Someone cleaned up dinner? Thanks! Someone took the recycling out? Thanks! Someone said, “Thanks”? Thanks!
Me too! I say ‘Thanks’ for just about everything, even times when it might seem inappropriate [I don't really know when those times are, but I'm sure they exist] but I shall now use my new Hobo deflection should my eternal gratitude create an uncomfortable situation.
I like the sweaters to be simple so the new piping and random stripes piss the heck out of me because there’s just no flow to them. It just seems like they were added in for the heck of it. I think the new Columbus sweaters look the best because there’s actually structure to them and the striping actually works together.
And Steph, if you’re still keeping track, my vote goes to the tall plaid ones because they are just too awesome although I’m not cool enough to pull them off. If I were buying for myself, since I’m adverse to bright colours I’d be all over that black love birds one.
Sherry, I can’t believe you’re a chronic over-thanker! I mean, you haven’t demonstrated a single trait so far in our acquaintance that would make me suspect that… :P (Between all the thanking and the apologizing I do, it’s amazing I can get another word in edgewise.)
Me either…It’s like they just want to see how many bells and whistles can be thrown on them before they’re way gaudy – newsflash, not as many as you’re sticking there.
Anyway I’m off now – I just remembered if I hurry I can probably still make it to the Peoples’ Co-Op which, while far from a Nino Salvaggio’s, is the closest thing to a fresh market we have. And I still need groceries!
Bye, Steph! Have fun grocery shopping! Imagine how better you’ll food will taste when you’re grocery shopping in those plaid boots!
Sherry, I can’t believe you’re a chronic over-thanker! I mean, you haven’t demonstrated a single trait so far in our acquaintance that would make me suspect that
Awww, Schnookie, thanks for recognizing that about me!
:P
By Steph! Have fun!
Yeah, Sherry, you’re just unconscionably rude all the time here! :P
I’m also a chronic apologizer. You guys might have guessed I’m a huge klutz, and one time when I was on the phone, I tripped over the phone chord [it was super long, okay?] and yes. I apologized to the phone chord. Who tripped me.
Yeah, Sherry, you’re just unconscionably rude all the time here! :P
I’m sorry! I’ll try to be better, thanks for telling me!
I’m sorry! I’ll try to be better, thanks for telling me!
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
My klutziness and social incompetence are so powerful that I dreamt while napping yesterday that I was at a party with Crunchy and I kept doing things like accidentally throwing ice on him and insulting him, and I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t stop myself. And because this is so far within the realm of reality for me, I woke up thinking I’d actually done all that stuff. I was so chagrined and all, “God, I wish I wasn’t such a doofus and hadn’t spilled all that crap on Crunchy. I might have made a good impression on him otherwise…”
yes. I apologized to the phone chord. Who tripped me.
Thanks for making me laugh out loud, Sherry. Oh wait, that sounds like I’m laughing at you. I’m not! I apologize!
No wonder we don’t many flamers here. They’re scared by our collective never-ending politeness!
Aww, Schnookie that sounds like a perfect meet cute situation if Hollywood romantic comedies are any indication. You guys are clearly meant to be that way!
Crunchy didn’t think so. I kept invading his personal space and making him cranky.
Thanks for making me laugh out loud, Sherry. Oh wait, that sounds like I’m laughing at you. I’m not! I apologize!
That’s okay Pookie. The worst part was my housemate was also there and she gave me the biggest “What the phonk?!” look before proceeding to laugh at me for 5 minutes straight.
Crunchy didn’t think so. I kept invading his personal space and making him cranky.
You just caught Crunchy on an off-day. I’m sure the next day he was wondering who that gorgeous charming girl with the amazing throwing arm was.
I’m sure the next day he was wondering who that gorgeous charming girl with the amazing throwing arm was.
Yeah, he probably woke up from his nap yesterday thinking, “That dream girl! She’s got such an accurate throw and such a quick yet still really abrasive wit! I must have her!!”
“That dream girl! She’s got such an accurate throw and such a quick yet still really abrasive wit! I must have her!!”
Of course! Crunchy was so moved by the fact that somebody was actually saying negatives about him for once instead of lauding praise and adoration on him. And of course we all know he has a weakness for people with good aim. Or something.
Well, for Crunchy having projectiles hit him and baseless insults hurled at him is just another day at the office.
Yeah insults based in reality just aren’t as much fun :P
okay, I may have found my perfect rain boots:
http://canada.zappos.com/n/p/dp/28746796/c/82211.html
except they don’t have my size…curse you size 5!
I think I’m out of here for a few hours. It’s time for me to go give my catsitting charges some dinner, and then I need a nap before embarking on shaping my gnocchi and making my pesto. Cheerio, all!
Sherry, those boots are adorable!
Good luck Schnookie!
Those boots are awesome!
I, too, am leaving now. Finally, my entirely painless day of work is coming to an end. See you all later, IPB!
See you Pookie! I’ll just stare wistfully at my boots for a couple of hours. :P
Well, since everybody is clearing out of here I think I shall park myself in front of the TV for awhile. If you guys are free tonight I think we’re having another Cutting Edge viewing.
See ya!
Sherry those boots are adorable, I love them too (of course, it’s a safe bet that if something is plaid, I will love it).
Meanwhile thanks to construction downtown it took me about a half hour to park at the Co-Op…but I have fresh zucchini and coleslaw!
but I have fresh zucchini and coleslaw!
Ew! Veggies!
Man, I really really wish they had my size in those boots, sigh.
Ew! Veggies!
Um, I also bought two kinds of chicken, a steak, and some crab meat? :P
They have the ones I want in my stupidly huge shoe size…but I’m pretty sure it’s going to take at least a week of agonzing before I commit $60 to boots.
Mmmm…meat :P
I attempted to take a nap and my mom felt that was the appropriate time to make extremely loud banging noises in the kitchen.
but I’m pretty sure it’s going to take at least a week of agonzing before I commit $60 to boots.
$60 to boots is actually a pretty good deal from what I’m used to!
Haha, I love that you guys are looking at shoes. I want these boots along with 403784089 other pairs of shoes. I usually browse online for stuff when I’m bored and have checked my daily sites. This usually ends up with me wanting more than I can afford and using my weird reasoning skills to rationalize the purchasing of things I don’t need (like more shoes). My latest is that my brother owes me a very belated birthday gift, so he can use that money to buy me shoes. Most of the shoes that I liked were at Urban Outfitters and most of them were heels that I won’t really wear. Some of them had too high of heels, but I like them that I’d buy them anyway.
My mother would probably do something similar – only intentionally, because she doesn’t actually feel that one should take naps. I don’t know either.
$60 to boots is actually a pretty good deal from what I’m used to!
It probably is! But I hate boots and don’t buy them, remember? I’m not used to boot-prices!
And since I didn’t want to piss off Senor Spam. I really really really really like these. I always go for the expensive things.
Crap I was going to make those cupcakes but I just thinking I had ginger and I forgot it was supposed to be crystallized. I wonder if I can improvise and just add a bit more of other things to compensate…
And Genna those are cute too! They would certainly match far more things than the one I want (then again, I don’t really ever match, so…)
I rarely match too, Steph. I actually hate intentionally matching everyday clothing. Dressy stuff, okay those probably should match to some degree. By intentionally matching, I mean like blue stuff goes with blue and what not. That’s too matchy.
Yeah when I dress up I do tend to match a little more…and I guess I do sort of match colors, it’s just that I also usually wear like six different ones at once :P
One of my college friends matches his shoes to his outfit and I’m just like….they’re just…shoes? I have a pair of red sneakers that if I have to wear them then they are going with whatever outfit I have on regardless if they match or not. Most of the times they don’t match because they’re freaking red. The only time the non-matching bugs me is when I’m wearing something green. Then I feel like Christmas threw up on me.
Totally random, but catching up on comments/looking at NHL apparel and shoes online delays the slow process known as lace knitting. The pattern is easy, but jesus! It just doesn’t seem like I’m actually getting anywhere.
I have (canvas again haha) shoes in I swear nearly every color and I still never match them. In fact sometimes I deliberately wear ones that don’t match. I’m with you on the red and green though, that’s a combination I almost never wear unless I literally do have like every color on.
I feel ya on that except with flip flops. I’m a flip flops person and will wear them rain or shine and sometimes in the middle of winter if there isn’t a lot of snow on the ground. I find sneakers too constricting which is only because I wear flops so much. I need to wear sneakers everyday for like 2 weeks to get used to them.
I used to hate flip flops (though I always loved sandals), but this past year I’ve really started to like them. I totally wear sandals until it is like snowing. Of course last year the sandals I wore most gave me an extra inch and a half or so of height and sometimes kept my pants from dragging on the ground and getting soaked, so a lot of times I would wear them anyway and just suffer through really cold feet.
I have found that my feet just become numb to the cold which probably isn’t good. Honestly, people will see you in flip flops and be like “OMG, aren’t you cold!?”. If I wasn’t wearing pants, then yes I would be cold. Flip flops on the other hand don’t do enough damage for me to complain especially since I picked that option.
Aww Genna, those boots are SO cute.
I hate wearing flip-flops I have to say. It’s not just because I’m a self-proclaimed sock lover but also because I just never found them comfortable?
It’s good to see some more people coming on! Steph and I have been manning the ship while everyone was gone.
I think it’s about finding the right pair. I’ve just jumped on the Reef bandwagon. They are super comfy, the straps aren’t irritating, and they mold to your feet. While Birkenstocks aren’t flip flops, they are comfy and you can wear your socks with them. The soft bed ones are sooo nice. I want to get a pair of soft bed clogs eventually.
I have these obnoxious Rocket Dog ones with white and black stripes that I loved enough to buy even though they were flip flops…and I think I’ve just worn them in to the point of comfort by now.
I have a pair of Roxy ones that are hot pink and black checkerboard, but well the checkerboard pattern wore off everywhere except in front of my toes. They have no traction left from wearing them and you can see the imprint of my heel and toes that’s how worn in they are. It’s actually really unsafe to wear them because if there’s any liquid on the ground I just go flying.
Is it bad that while filling out my address on something I suddenly can’t remember if my street is Road or Drive? I’m a little concerned.
I never liked flip flops when I was younger but it didn’t matter because in Alabama the weather was nice enough that I could just go barefoot everywhere except for places where I had to have shoes on. I’ve started wearing flip flops some in Buffalo though to get me through the winter. My mother-in-law thinks it’s crazy, but I’m with you Genna. If everything else you’re wearing is warm enough, the flip flops don’t make much difference.
You guys! PitchyCrunchy is on the disabled list :(