It has come to our attention via several instances that the Parise Boys and their cohort Drew Stafford have an affinity for fake mustaches. As avid fans of the tragically underappreciated comedy show “Stella”, we cannot help but find this fact almost endlessly fascinating. These novelty disguises were prominently featured on “Stella” in the form of fake-mustache dealer Gary Meadows who gave a tour of his illicit wares: “You’ve got your Chuck Norris here… and your Dudley Do-Right…” Today we are imagining the Devils being contestants on the world’s coolest reality show, Project Mustache. And their challenge is to go on a shopping spree at Gary Meadows’ back-room mustache dealership, having been given $250 and 30 minutes. Let’s see what everyone bought, shall we?
Arron Asham – A Twits-style mustache, so he can be pleasantly surprised by all the foodstuffs contained therein.
Sergei Brylin – A lit-fuse filled Blackbeard to reinforce there’s more than meets the eye to this snack-sized swashbuckler.
David Clarkson – Purchased 10 of Meadows’ cheapest remainders mustaches and tied them all together, creating an epically long Frankenmustache that he can wrap around his head.
Patrik Elias – The Groucho Marx. Outside of a foecal oyster, a book is man’s best friend. Inside a foecal oyster, it’s too dark to read.
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