After the way they’ve lost their last two games, with their disinterested, lackadaisical play, we’ve decided we hate all the Devils and want them to suffer minor painful mishaps between now and Friday’s game with the Rangers that will cause them intense discomfort, but no serious injuries. Like papercuts, burned tongues, earaches and the like. Even more than that…
We want them all to get parking tickets.
We want them all to discover their fridges have broken, or their toilets start leaking so they have to wait on the plumber.
We want them to get all embarrassed at the grocery store when their credit card is denied at the checkout after they’ve had 15 bags of groceries rung up.
We want them to get pooped on by birds flying overhead.
We want them to put on their favorite pair of pants and discover a hole in the knee.
We want them to have bad hair days when they’re planning to have hot dates. Or better yet, to wake up with huge zits on their noses and foreheads before they’re supposed to go out for hot dates.
We want them to be walking around the mall and discover they have little sharp rocks in their shoes.