A Pollyanna Retrospective On A Season That Sucked: Day 3
May 14, 2008 by Schnookie
We love these playoffs, we really do. Honest. Cross our hearts and hope to become Rangers fans die. We’ll be happy when any one of the four teams still playing wins the Cup, even the Vegas Tranny Bride Flyers (if you can call what they’ve been doing the last three games “still playing”. And if you consider the Stars “still playing”, too). That said… there’s just nothing to say. The playoffs as they stand right now are perfectly cromulent and we’re perfectly content with them. However, contentment doesn’t put blog posts on the table. Happiness does, though, and so we’re setting our Playoff Goggles to “Time Machine” mode and are turning our sights to the season past. It took us an entire hour-long pizza lunch to find five things we really truly enjoyed about this season but find five things we did. Today we present Day 3 of our five day mini-series, “NHL 07-08 Regular Season: Through a Lens Playoff Goggle-ly”.
Day 3: Ottawa Senators
It’s really been beaten to death this Spring, but we can’t help but revisit the hilariously epic collapse of the Ottawa Senators as we cast about for things that made us happy during this past season. There’s nothing more annoying than having to hear about how amazingly good a team you don’t like is, and it’s doubly annoying when you know, in your heart of hearts, that said team just isn’t that good. It’s triply annoying when the team ousted your team and your secondary team and your tertiary team in the previous year’s playoffs. We knew the Senators weren’t that good when they beat Pittsburgh, then we knew they weren’t that good when they beat the Devils, and then we knew they weren’t that good when they beat the Sabres. Yet for some reason, many in the hockey world decided to overlook the “Wow. This team just isn’t that good” flameout the Sens experienced in the SCF and anointed them one of the all-time greats when they reeled off an astonishing record in their pre-Thanksgiving games. When the wheels finally fell off, we couldn’t have been more delighted.
No, wait, we could be more delighted! Because, Gentle Reader, there’s more! What the Ottawa Senators and their fawning supporters forgot to factor in when the season began was The Curse Of Beating Brodeur. Everybody likes seeing an overdog fail, but it’s that much sweeter to see it happen when you know it’s the black magick of your own team that’s haunting them. We’d try to reassure Senators fans that the worst is over, but previous Brodeur-cursed teams have included the seven-years-out-of-the-playoffs Rangers and the two-years-and-counting-out-of-the-playoffs Hurricanes. For all we know, the Ottawa Senators are going to be the gift that keeps on giving (to non-Sens fans, that is) for years to come!
Poor Yayson. I think he needs a change of scenery. And Dallas would be about as big a change as you could get, scenery-wise.
Au contraire, I think NJ would be the biggest change of scenery. Because, um… Ottawa doesn’t have highways and strip malls? I think Yayson would love being forced by Sutter to be defensively responsible!
we knew they weren’t that good when they beat the Sabres.
To be fair, the Sabres didn’t exactly make it difficult for the Sens to beat them.
I think Yayson would love being forced by Sutter to be defensively responsible!
I think Soupy would love to be forced to be defensively responsible. Then again, Devils red would clash with his hair.
I think Soupy would love to be forced to be defensively responsible. Then again, Devils red would clash with his hair.
Not.
Funny.
:PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
To be fair, the Sabres didn’t exactly make it difficult for the Sens to beat them.
Exactly! And neither did the Pens or the Devils!
(And Soupy would be a TERRIBLE Devil. Yayson would be a GREAT one. I will brook no argument on this issue. :P)
You guys, I am being PUNISHED for being good today. I walked to work (because it’s cloudy and, like, 70, and basically the perfect day to walk, and I probably will talk myself out of walking based on weather for the next six months), and after I got here I was like, “Huh. I’m feeling all creepy-crawly-like now.” I chalked it up to being out of shape and weak and basically overwhelmed by my exertions, but just now I discovered I HAD A TICK ON MY LEG. EEEEEEEEWWWWWW!!!!! I am so grossed out, and I am NEVER going outside EVER AGAIN.
And that’s my story.
I am so grossed out, and I am NEVER going outside EVER AGAIN.
Eww! I am so, so, sorry, Schnookie! Not to get too TMI, but you haven’t removed the tick yet, have you? Because you need to er…burn them off.
Poor Yayson. I think he needs a change of scenery. And Dallas would be about as big a change as you could get, scenery-wise.
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I don’t know how I really feel about Yayson. At all.
The tick was still fresh and crawling on me. It hadn’t dug its vile heinousness into my flesh yet. It was monologing, telling me all of its evil plans, thereby giving me time to obliterate it and flush it down the toilet. I now want to throw some dynamite down the toilet after it, just for good measure.
Omgosh, I’m so sorry Schnookie! That sounds awful! Ticks = yucky.
You know what would make me feel better about the tick? If the Devils traded Gio for Yayson. Today. Right now. Get on that, Lou!
The tick was still fresh and crawling on me. It hadn’t dug its vile heinousness into my flesh yet.
Oh, thank god! Whenever I go out with my dad doing things, I always have to check for ticks afterwards, even though I use bug spray. I hate those things! I’m not as paranoid about ticks as I am about snakes. I’m always afraid I’m going to step on one or have one drop on me (I’m a big wuss.)
I now want to throw some dynamite down the toilet after it, just for good measure.
I wouldn’t blame you in the slightest! God, death to ticks and nastiness!
Because you need to er…burn them off.
Ohnonono, don’t do that! That makes them throw up on you and heightens the risk of disease transmission. Pull, sloooowly and not too firmly with something like a pair of tweezers. They make special ones for tick removal. I used to have to pull them off Napoleon every 2 months.
Oh, and Soupy the Devil? No. Just, no.
Yayson however, is very welcome. Come on-a our house, Yayson!
That makes them throw up on you and heightens the risk of disease transmission.
Seriously? I was always taught to get a match, blow it out and quickly put it on the tick. You learn something new everyday!
I was always taught to get a match, blow it out and quickly put it on the tick.
I was always taught to do that with leeches, but turns out most of these bloodsuckers will throw up on/in you if you do that. Nice.
The ticks I’m really freaking out about now are the deer ticks. The one on me today was one of those Jeep-sized ones that are more disgusting than dangerous. I’m probably also covered in Lyme-bearing deer ticks, but I can’t see any of them because they’re all disguised as freckles.
I would also not welcome snakes dropping on me. That’s… not cook. I don’t walk under many trees on my walk, though, so it would take something like a bird dropping a snake on me to make that happen, and I guess that would be pretty cool, if you think about it. (My greatest wildlife fear on my commute today was the geese. There’s a goose couple that hangs out right along the bike path, and I figure if they’d been there when I walked by, I was going to have to find a really long way around, because those bastards are mean, mean birds. Fortunately, they were off doing something else this morning.)
I was always taught to do that with leeches, but turns out most of these bloodsuckers will throw up on/in you if you do that. Nice.
That is A) disgusting and B) sooo unsanitary. Didn’t anyone give leeches and ticks the memo on not throwing up?
At least I don’t ever have to worry about leeches…usually.
I got over my fear of snakes really fast when we lived in Hong Kong. Those fuckers are everywhere. I still don’t like them, but I don’t feel as threatened by them as I did before. In fact, one of the most hilarious experiences I’ve ever had was my dad driving over a snake when he backed the car out of the driveway and the thing didn’t die. Didn’t even move! The police came, the army came, and finally a snake specialist had to come to take it away (probably to be turned into soup, poor thing)
What kind of snake prompted that kind of response from the authorities, Mags? That’s awesome! We had rattlesnakes in AZ (among many others), and you were just supposed to call animal control if you ran into one. Boomer once saw one all stretched out and sunning itself in the street in our neighborhood, but other than that, we managed to avoid them pretty well. Not so the scorpions. *Shudder* *Reminds self that a tick is nowhere NEAR as nasty as a scorpion, and feels better*
I would also not welcome snakes dropping on me.
I have had one almost drop on me. And that was terrifying.
Also, my dad worked outdoors a lot and would take me with him and he goes hunting, so when I was a kid, Dad would be like, “Watch out for the trees, watch out for the rattlesnake burrows”. Copperheads like to hang out in trees and they are poisonous. Plus, hearing my dad’s stories of water moccasins trying to climb in boats with him was…::shudder:: so terrifying. I hate snakes.
Geese are fuckers. I hate those things.
Mags, I am crossing China/Hong Kong off of my “Places to Visit” list. :D
The police came, the army came, and finally a snake specialist had to come to take it away
Was it poisonous or something?
See, all the snake stories I hear are about garden snakes. I think if I’d grown up hearing your dad’s stories, Caitlin, I’d be a hell of a lot more terrified of them. And if I’d had a snake almost drop on me. That’s awful.
Geese are fuckers. I hate those things.
I don’t hate geese as much as ducks. And that is entirely not hockey related. My high school had a moat around it with lots of ducks and those fuckers used to come and steal our lunches.
What kind of snake prompted that kind of response from the authorities, Mags?
I had to call my dad and ask because I don’t remember, and he says some kind of huge fuck off cobra.
Mags, I am crossing China/Hong Kong off of my “Places to Visit” list. :D
Cross off Australia too then. Or at least the bush. Ayers Rock is gorgeous, but the knowledge that 14 of the world’s most venomous snakes live around the rock kind of take the shine off it. (thank, tour guide! Not)
Dude, the most venomous EVERYTHING lives in Australia.
Dude, the most venomous EVERYTHING lives in Australia.
Yeah, I guess that is true.
Ayers Rock is gorgeous, but the knowledge that 14 of the world’s most venomous snakes live around the rock kind of take the shine off it.
Yeah, I already live in a state with five kinds of venomous snakes. I have no desire to go someplace with more. :P
I think if I’d grown up hearing your dad’s stories, Caitlin, I’d be a hell of a lot more terrified of them.
Well, and since we do have venomous snakes here where a couple kinds have potentially fatal venom, they also hammer it into you in school about snakes. (Little kids, obviously, will die quicker than adults.) I remember in 3rd grade having to watch a video on “the dangers of snakes”.
I remember in 3rd grade having to watch a video on “the dangers of snakes”.
I’ll bet that was a fun experience.
I’ll bet that was a fun experience.
It was more like 30 minutes of “The Dangers of Being an Idiot” - with an announcer telling you things like, “Hey, jackass, don’t stick your hand in a dark, damp place where you can’t see what’s in there.”
Then after all the overdramatic “snakes are dangerous!” portion, we got a fifteen minute “snakes are our friends, too” segment.
Wow! That’s pretty cool that you had to be warned about snakes when you were a kid. I don’t think we had anything like that when I was little on Long Island. Just some good, sturdy, ’80s-morality “Just Say No” films and whatnot. Of course, there aren’t a lot of venomous snakes on Long Island.
Then after all the overdramatic “snakes are dangerous!” portion, we got a fifteen minute “snakes are our friends, too” segment.
Really, I guess that’s so you don’t go unnecessarily killing them.
Of course, there aren’t a lot of venomous snakes on Long Island.
Unless you go to the zoo…
Just some good, sturdy, ’80s-morality “Just Say No” films and whatnot.
Same here. Only mine were film strips with the occasional religious bent. (You’d expect any less from a Catholic school?)
Only mine were film strips with the occasional religious bent. (You’d expect any less from a Catholic school?)
HA! Our dad went to Catholic school in the ’50s, and when we started getting sex-ed classes in our decidedly non-Catholic schools when we were kids, he used to tell us that sex-ed classes for him involved a furiously-blushing nun running into the room, shouting, “Don’t do it!” and then dashing back out of the room.
Whoa, I’m glad the snake discussion turned into a sex-ed discussion before I got here. Having grown up in the country, I have a very healthy fear of snakes. We always had dogs which were excellent at finding the snakes before we did. My dad once killed a pair of rattlesnakes that were 5′ each and as big around as your arm. He had to get his gun out for those two. He usually just used a garden hoe.
And that is my snake story.
The big news at school right now is that they are about to show the 5th graders “the hygiene video”. The Kid keeps begging me to get her out of it but I told her it was one of those “right of passage” kind of things she shouldn’t miss. Am I right?
Oh and Good morning, IPB!
Pull, sloooowly and not too firmly with something like a pair of tweezers.
Late to the tick party to say that you should also be sure to grab the tick by the head, not the back, to reduce the chance of it vomiting in you.
I’ve only seen a poisonous snake in the wild once (rattlesnake in the Catskills) and it was asleep so we just walked right by it. When my sister and I were driving around the country we spent a few days in Big Bend Nat’l Park. One of the park people was all, “well we’ve 12 different kinds of scorpions here but the only deadly kind lives in Arizona.” (I made that number up, but it was around that) We were like, “great, but you’re also 90 miles from the nearest hospital. Not cool!”
Snakes don’t scare me nearly as much as creepy crawly things.
The Kid keeps begging me to get her out of it but I told her it was one of those “right of passage” kind of things she shouldn’t miss. Am I right?
Ohh, yes, that definitely is one of those things you have to go through. My “hygiene video” was hosted by a 13 year old who was playing in the Broadway production (at that time) of Annie. So she and the starring cast of Annie were in it and now I can never look at Annie in the same way. Thanks a lot, hygiene video!
I remember in 3rd grade having to watch a video on “the dangers of snakes”.
I lived in a semi-rural area when I was little and the videos we got were for rabid raccoons. My sister was afraid to go upstairs alone when she was little because she was afraid of the raccoons. I think they still make both of us a little nervous.
I lived in a semi-rural area when I was little and the videos we got were for rabid raccoons.
Makes sense, Meg! I’m sorry you’re still a little nervous about them but they’re bitches anyways. :P
Oh, and I got a lot of those “Just Say No” videos. When the black-tar heroin epidemic hit out in Plano, we had to watch videos/get pamphlets about the dangers of heroin.
The worst were the sex-ed presentations. In middle school, I had to listen to one lady discuss how abstinance is the only way to go, and then discussed what happens when you have sex, emotionally. To demonstrate, she put on a pair of gloves and said dramatically, “When you have sex, you come together like this, and when you break up, because of sex, this is what it sounds like inside, emotionally, for you” and pulled apart her hands.
There was Velcro on the gloves, so imagine the sound for a second. Then imagine 300 kids giggling like crazy directly after.
“You know what would make me feel better about the tick? If the Devils traded Gio for Yayson. Today. Right now. ”
Are you sure that the tick was not Gio out for revenge. Did you put it under the microscope? It could very well have been him.
I am upset that you want Gio out, I love tiny Gio even when he is not doing his job effectively. Wait, what is his job? I figured he was just a little troll that tried to make homes in the opposing team’s net. Every team needs a troll.
I saw Yayson in a pub the other day with Heatley. They are way too in love to break up. Also if you take him away from the Sens then who will I have left to swoon for when the sens play (since I no longer have bigZ ). I guess there is always Vermette (because he is pretty). Being on the east coast of Canada I am in Sens zone, which means I only get Sens games on my TV unless it is Satuday night - then I get the Leafs. I stick with the Devils despite the fact that we have a very difficult long distance romance and I see them only on rare occasions each year.
Plus Yayson will bring Cribbage to the Devils and I do not think they need to have their minds on Cribbage when they should have their minds on hockey. Yes he plays Cribbage…I saw it with my own eyes, and he has a bad jewelery commercial and he cannot act. The interviews are nice though but I do not see him with the Devils - too tall and too expensive.
My “hygiene video” was hosted by a 13 year old who was playing in the Broadway production (at that time) of Annie.
NO WAY! Mine had Annie in it, too, but that was a good 10 years before you would have seen yours. Were they STILL using the same one? Wow.
If I have to remove any more ticks from me, post-evil monologing stage (god forbid), I don’t think I’ll be able to think clearly enough to differentiate between engorged body and head. Seriously. I’ll just pass out and have to be taken to the emergency room to have it removed. And whatever body part it was on removed as well. I’m convinced they’re all over me again! I was doing so much better after doing as thorough a check as I possibly could in a public bathroom.
My “hygiene video” was hosted by a 13 year old who was playing in the Broadway production (at that time) of Annie.
I saw the same one!
Snakes, geese, rabid racoons, ticks… I never want to go outside again! When I worked in Santa Fe for a summer, someone found a tarantula in the set loading dock. The guys got a big kick out of picking up the small box it was crawling on and turning it all around to see it keep scurrying the top. I was sure it was going to leap at them like in the movies.
Were they STILL using the same one? Wow.
Er, probably. I just remember being really squicked out by all of that, and then being admonished by the teachers not to talk to the boys about our presentation (WTF).
Plus Yayson will bring Cribbage to the Devils and I do not think they need to have their minds on Cribbage when they should have their minds on hockey.
This could be where IPB-ology and reality have blurred for me, but aren’t Zach and Travis pretty mean cribbage players?
Ugh, Cribbage. Really - Zach and Travis. Their new names are grandpa 1 and grandpa 2.
Are you sure that the tick was not Gio out for revenge. Did you put it under the microscope? It could very well have been him.
Crap! I flushed Gio down the toilet and then tossed a stick of dynamite after him. Dammit! He was going to be the Devils’ big trade bait this summer! I’ve ruined everything!!
My beef with Gio is just that he doesn’t crash the net anymore, thereby cutting drastically into his effectiveness as a player. He’s just not skilled enough to work only on the perimeter. I do love him, though — I mean, who doesn’t?
I had no idea Yayson was a cribbager. He wouldn’t be bringing any insidious outside force with him, because Zach lists cribbage as his hobby in the media guide, and apparently he and Travis play it in their hotel room (ifyouknowwhatimean). So what I’m saying is that Yayson is a PERFECT FIT for the Devils!
And Q-girl, the Devils appreciate the effort you make to hold up your end of the long-distance relationship. Since they certainly don’t want to do any of the work. :P
In eighth grade I had Health class for 1/2 a year. My section was taught by a kind of dim-witted gym teacher who had lived overseas for a tiny bit of his life playing or coaching minor league basketball or something. Anyway, he used to bound into the room and say:
“Today we’re learning about nutrition and what’s good to eat so you grow big and strong. I knew a guy. In Greece. He was 6′8″!”
Then he’d run to the board and write 6′8″ on the blackboard.
“He played ball. Becuase he was [gestures to board] 6′8″! That’s tall. He was Greek, I think. ”
Then he’d write “Greek” on the blackboard.
“Did I mention he was 6′8″? Ho, look at the time! Class dismissed!”
All of my notes for what consitutes a nutritious meal read: 6′8″ Greek. No wonder I’m a fatty!
Did anyone else get samples of hygiene products after the talk? Every so often, we would get samples of deodorant, tampons, soap, etc. and a pamphlet or two.
All of my notes for what consitutes a nutritious meal read: 6′8″ Greek.
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Speaking of which, I really really miss Greek food.
Hey Gambler!
Amy, I never got any samples. Mainly just an admonishment of, “Don’t talk to anyone else about this and don’t have sex” was all I got.
Did anyone else get samples of hygiene products after the talk? Every so often, we would get samples of deodorant, tampons, soap, etc. and a pamphlet or two.
We did way back in the day and the note they sent home to us parents said they will be for the Kid’s as well. Some things never change. I do know that some of my friends still haven’t talked to their daughters about their periods and they are all 11 now. I am admonishing all of you when your turn comes to talk to your kids early and often so that it is no big deal. My friends talk about wanting to keep their kids “innocent” while their kids’ friends are filling their heads with all kinds of crazy stuff. They won’t talk to their parents because they are too uncomfortable. The Kid and I talk about everything and always have. There is nothing she can’t ask me and she knows that.
Ok, that is my rant for today.
Can I just say I am really missing the Kid. I have never gone more than 24 hours without talking to her. :(
You got SAMPLES, Amy? What kind of Catholic school was this? I went to a touchy-feely liberal prep school, still in the final throes of its Birkenstock-y phase (before becoming just another assy, elitist private school), and we didn’t get diddly-poo from our hygiene classes. (Of course, this school was no Waldorf school like someone here went to…)
Ugh, Cribbage. Really - Zach and Travis. Their new names are grandpa 1 and grandpa 2.
Hey! What are you saying? I love cribbage, and often hold it up as a reason why Zach/Travis/Yayson (I’m so happy to add him to this list) and I would get along great. :P
My friends talk about wanting to keep their kids “innocent” while their kids’ friends are filling their heads with all kinds of crazy stuff.
Now, I don’t have kids, so I’m speaking from a position of total ignorance, but I remember being a kid, and seriously, who thinks their children aren’t hearing about all kinds of shit from their friends? I don’t understand that parental approach at all. Myra, I think you’re awesome for making sure the Kid is comfortable talking with you about anything.
And that’s so sad that you miss her! I bet she misses you too. :( Although I’m sure she’s having fun!
I never even had health classes. We got a video about sex during bio once, and that was it. And that was more about the biology of sex than anything else. No samples either. My assy private school totally stiffed me.
I don’t remember ever having a hygeine talk much less getting samples.
Can I just say I am really missing the Kid. I have never gone more than 24 hours without talking to her. :(
Awwww! I’m sure she misses you, too. I wonder if she’s enjoying camp or if she’s right now starting to think, “Someday, I too will sit around during the long workday and I think, ‘Well, at least I’m not at camp!’” :D (I’m sure she’s having tons of fun!)
What kind of Catholic school was this?
Just a regular run-of-the-mill Catholic elementary school. I also remember getting them in high school too, because people would use the deodorant samples to write messages on people’s lockers. (Its all fun and games until you have to clean it up.)
Can I just say I am really missing the Kid. I have never gone more than 24 hours without talking to her. :(
I’m sorry, Myra! I’m sure they’re trying to keep her waaaay busy and she still misses you. But she’s having fun anyway.
“Someday, I too will sit around during the long workday and I think, ‘Well, at least I’m not at camp!’”
That thought has crossed my mind more than once, but basically it is an Earth Science trip and she loves science so hopefully she’s having a good time.
Schnookie, If you love cribbage then your new name can be grandma1.
(Of course, this school was no Waldorf school like someone here went to…)
I was just going to say that I feel totally let down in this department by my Waldorf school experience. All we got was a few uncomfortable moments with our teacher looking at a picture book during the reproductive system section of our anatomy block. And we were too busy making things out of hemp to bother learning about drugs.
I do, however, remember this one time they had this guy come to our class to talk about how plants grow, or something, and he ended up going on this big rant about how all of our preconceived religious notions about creation (of which we had none, because we were 4rd grade Waldorf students) were false, and everything has to die in order to be born. My teacher faked him having a phone call to get him out of the room and then told him to leave. It was awesome.
Schnookie, If you love cribbage then your new name can be grandma1.
Ha! I wonder how hard the smackdown is going to be if I use that on a regular basis.
Oh gosh usually I just ignore my typos, but really? 4rd? Looks like I miscounted my acorns on that one.
My teacher faked him having a phone call to get him out of the room and then told him to leave. It was awesome.
That’s AWESOME!
Schnookie, If you love cribbage then your new name can be grandma1
Hey now! Cribbage is like the best game ever! It’s got the perfect mix of pure luck and minor strategy! And it keeps your brain sharp by requiring you do simple math. I love cribbage with all my heart and cannot think of a single card/board game I’d rather play. (Although I’m a little obsessed with dominoes now, after playing Mexican Train at a friends house a few weekends ago.)
I’m sorry, Myra! I’m sure they’re trying to keep her waaaay busy and she still misses you. But she’s having fun anyway.
Thanks Mags and everyone else for your words of encouragement!
*sniff*
Schnookie, If you love cribbage then your new name can be grandma1.
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And we were too busy making things out of hemp to bother learning about drugs.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
And really, Gambler, “4rd”? That’s not even a miscounted acorn issue. I think that’s a “making things out of hemp, ifyouknowwhatimean” kind of issue. :P
I wonder how hard the smackdown is going to be if I use that on a regular basis.
Heh. It would be very hard. :PPPP
And really, Gambler, “4rd”? That’s not even a miscounted acorn issue. I think that’s a “making things out of hemp, ifyouknowwhatimean” kind of issue. :P
*gigglesnort*
Heh. It would be very hard. :PPPP
I figured as much :)
“making things out of hemp, ifyouknowwhatimean”
Travis: I don’t know what you mean.
Travis: I don’t know what you mean.
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Paulie: Here, let me show you.
It would be very hard
That’s what she said. ;-)
TSN has an article up about Team USA’s loss last night, and Zach is playing the role of Mr. Mary Sunshine about the team and its future.
It would be very hard
That’s what she said. ;-)
Dude, no sex ed is getting me. I had to really think about that for a second *is a giant dork*
That’s what she said. ;-)
HAHAHA!!! Nice one! That was sitting there in the wheelhouse, just waiting for the “that’s what she said” treatment! :D
and Zach is playing the role of Mr. Mary Sunshine about the team and its future.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: That’s our Zach! Always Mr. Mary Sunshine. Except when the Devils are sucking, and then he looks so endlessly pathetic and unable to wrap his brain around the fact that he’s not a winner. Heh.
Oh god, I’m watching Gilmore Girls and Taylor found a lot of pot plants and Sookie is suggesting she bake it into brownies. I instantly thought of Paulie and then fell off my chair laughing.
Alix, I’m blaming you.
Zach is playing the role of Mr. Mary Sunshine about the team and its future.
Is he doing that insufferable “I thought we played really well” even when they didn’t thing? That drives me nuts!
Pookie, judge for yourself:
“Our future is looking really good,” Parise said. “We have a lot of good young players. There is a lot to build off from this tournament, but at the same time, it’s disappointing right now.
“We felt we had a good chance to go to Quebec City, and unfortunately, that’s not the case right now. But we’ll be a good team in the future.”
Aw, poor sad little Zach. That stuff sounds reasonably true, though. Its the “the Devils lost 10-1 and Zach was minus 10″ and he says after the game, “I thought we had lots of great chances and played really well.”
Hm. That seemed like a much more pragmatic Mr. Mary Sunshine. His Mr. Mary Sunshine act in Jersey normally involves him playing like ass then saying, “I think I’m playing really well.”
Travis: I don’t know what you mean.
Paulie: Here, let me show you.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
instantly thought of Paulie and then fell off my chair laughing.
Alix, I’m blaming you.
Buahahaha. My day is complete.
alix, you’re our resident pothead, I guess!
Hee. Apparently I am, Schnookie. Voting for the marijuana party will do that, I guess. If I’m way to into junk food if we all meet up at the draft…you’ll know why. :D
If I’m way to into junk food if we all meet up at the draft…you’ll know why.
HAHAHAHAHA! (I have no excuse. I’d just be way too into the junk food because I have terrible eating habits! :D)
I think Yayson would love being forced by Sutter to be defensively responsible!
Dave Tippett could do it better! So there. :P
Dave Tippett could do it better! So there. :P
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!! He wants to be a DEVIL! Not a Star! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
(See how rational I can be?)
Dave Tippett would give in the first time Yayson gave him those puppy dog eyes. He’s too sweet looking, that Tipp! Sutter? Not so much sweet looking.
Schnookie, you were right about Scott Mellanby being in a bar brawl. He jumped in to help a buddy and his arm was sliced with a broken beer bottle. It severed an artery, a nerve, and several tendons. Eeeek.
HAHAHAHAHA! (I have no excuse. I’d just be way too into the junk food because I have terrible eating habits! :D)
HEE!
I think Spezza would fit in with Buffalo. He and Roy-Z could compare fashion and modeling notes.
And besides, it would be really cook to have a guy with the middle name of “Rocco” in the room.
Nah, Yason’s coming to Vancouver. Him and Nazzy can compare youse attractive notes as they check out the Swedish Touch massage parlours.
Drew “Rocco” Stafford is like, “What am I, chopper liver?”
(How awesome would it be if Staffy’s middle name was Rocco? He’d get another bad-season pass for that one.)
as they check out the Swedish Touch massage parlours.
:^::::::::::::::::::::
Drew “Rocco” Stafford is like, “What am I, chopper liver?”
Yes, Staffy is the liver chopper. Someone has to keep up with Pommerdoodle’s required supply of liver snacks.
Him and Nazzy can compare youse attractive notes as they check out the Swedish Touch massage parlours.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Meanwhile, Matty’s like, “If you’re me, it’s a Swedish Touch massage parlour EVERYWHERE YOU GO!”
Yes, Staffy is the liver chopper. Someone has to keep up with Pommerdoodle’s required supply of liver snacks.
HAHAHAHA!!! He also happens to be chopped liver, figuratively, but the literal chopped liver is for Cap’n Pommers.
Meanwhile, Matty’s like, “If you’re me, it’s a Swedish Touch massage parlour EVERYWHERE YOU GO!”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Yes, Staffy is the liver chopper. Someone has to keep up with Pommerdoodle’s required supply of liver snacks.
:^:::::::::::::::::
Meanwhile, Matty’s like, “If you’re me, it’s a Swedish Touch massage parlour EVERYWHERE YOU GO!”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Ok, I just checked the timestamp on my post, and alix’s… and dude, did y’all die?
Ok, I just checked the timestamp on my post, and alix’s… and dude, did y’all die?
Uh, I didn’t….but then again, I’ve been working on contracts. FUN!
Yes, I did die. I finally succumbed to the tick. :P
I’ve been working on contracts. FUN!
I’m sorry!
We had a bbq to celebrate the last of the good weather, and then we got rained on. Good food and good pictures though, so whatever.
Yes, I did die. I finally succumbed to the tick. :P
I’m not sure where to go with that. I had this whole “dead Schnookie is not funny” thing going in my head, where Pookie was so saddened by your demise at the hands of the tick that she stopped blogging and devoted her life and the blog to the eradication of ticks and then we all lost our IPB homes and it was sad. And Boomer and the cats were in there too but I have a short attention span. And that is my story.
One should never throw a BBQ to celebrate good weather unless one is hoping for bad weather. :P I’m glad there was good food, good pictures, and, I assume, good times, though!
And the story of IPB crumbling without me was both saddening and encouraging. It’s good to know I’m needed. :P
I’m not dead… yet. I’m bored enough that it seems inevitable, though.
One should never throw a BBQ to celebrate good weather unless one is hoping for bad weather
We were kind of expecting rain. It was actually a sort of “fuck you, weather” bbq :D
I’m not dead… yet. I’m bored enough that it seems inevitable, though.
I’m sorry :(
I’m bored enough that it seems inevitable, though.
I was trying to think of something interesting to say to perk you up, but… I got nuthin’. I guess I’m a major contributing factor to your boredom — the dancing monkey that won’t dance anymore. :P
Ok, I just checked the timestamp on my post, and alix’s… and dude, did y’all die?
I was at a training session about billboards. I do have chocolate now, so it was worth it.
I was trying to think of something interesting to say to perk you up, but… I got nuthin’.
Me neither. I was going to talk about my knitting, but all I have going at the moment is a big sack of a sweater out of this indigo dyed cotton that stains my hands something awful. And some socks in Dallas Stars colours which I’ve stopped knitting because I think it’s cursing them.
I need to start going to Amy’s training sessions, because she gets chocolate!
I once knit a sweater out of indigo dyed cotton, and my hands were just constantly blue from it, too. That stuff is brutal! I gave it to a friend, who I lost touch with shortly thereafter, so I never found out if it continued to rub so much color off onto other things in sweater form.
I was going to talk about my knitting
Yeah, my knitting’s not going very well either, so I’m surfing Epicurious, looking at recipes.
I was at a training session about billboards. I do have chocolate now, so it was worth it.
I’m immeasurably jealous. My kingdom for a piece of chocolate.
Epicurious is always good for passing an afternoon!
I never found out if it continued to rub so much color off onto other things in sweater form.
Bummer. Apparently I’m supposed to wash this on hot so it’ll shrink, and most of the dye is supposed to come out in that initial washing. I’m skeptical, but we’ll see.
I would suspect one good washing would get the non-colorfast dye out of your sweater, Mags. That kind of makes sense. You’ll have to let us know how it goes!
I’m surfing Epicurious, looking at recipes.
I was on there this afternoon, hunting down a good recipe for pumpkin waffles. And then I found one and when I was setting up, I discovered my waffle iron was broken. I’m thinking about getting one that makes heart shaped waffles now. That seems like fun.
I was on there this afternoon, hunting down a good recipe for pumpkin waffles.
Ooh! Pumpkin waffles sound SO. GOOD.
I’m looking for easy cake/cookie recipes. By easy I mean, “not that hard so Caitlin doesn’t set herself on fire accidentally”.
:D
You’ll have to let us know how it goes!
Will do. If I ever get done knitting it. Curses on me for deciding a guy with a 3188764″ chest circumference is worth a sweater.
I’m looking for easy cake/cookie recipes.
I can send you a recipe for homemade oreos…
I can send you a recipe for homemade oreos…
That sounds awesome!
Curses on me for deciding a guy with a 3188764″ chest circumference is worth a sweater.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Caitlin, Pookie spent much of yesterday evening perusing the cookies on epicurious, and we decided to make THESE tonight. They seemed kind of new and “out of our comfort zone” for a change.
By easy I mean, “not that hard so Caitlin doesn’t set herself on fire accidentally”.
I’m a fan of chocolate chip cookie dough baked with a peanut butter cup in the middle.
Schnookie, those cookies look delicious! Let us know how they turn out for y’all!
I’m a fan of chocolate chip cookie dough baked with a peanut butter cup in the middle.
Ooh. This sounds so good. :)
That sounds awesome!
Email on the way!
Schnookie, those cookies look DELISH. *grabby hands* stupid bikini diet.
I’m a fan of chocolate chip cookie dough baked with a peanut butter cup in the middle.
That sounds marvelous!
Ooh. This sounds so good. :)
They really are.
Schnookie, those cookies look yummy.
Email on the way!
Dankeschoen! These sound really, really good!
Ok, I just checked the timestamp on my post, and alix’s… and dude, did y’all die?
Sorry. I managed to get very distracted imagining me and Matty at a Swedish Touch massage parlour. :D
I managed to get very distracted imagining me and Matty at a Swedish Touch massage parlour. :D
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I managed to get very distracted imagining me and Matty at a Swedish Touch massage parlour. :D
Somehow, I’m not surprised by this :D
Ok, I’m going to bed NOW. Otherwise I’ll miss another game and then I’ll be mad because that would put me at 0-8 for the 3rd round. See youse!
Good night, Mags!
Amy, chocolate chip cookie dough with a peanut butter cup inside sounds phenomenal! Next time I’m up in Buffalo, let’s have those instead of Mochi.
Next time I’m up in Buffalo, let’s have those instead of Mochi.
Definitely!
It’s 5pm. I get to go home now. Catch y’all later!
I’m sitting here sifting through Christmas needlework projects, and I had no idea teddy bears were such a…popular Christmas theme. Yuck! (No offense to anyone who may like teddy bears and Christmas together, but they’re not up my alley.)
Alright, Flyers! Let’s see this series go one more game after this just so we get more hockey! (Because, uh, we’re all so enamored of the Playoffs this year? Nevermind.)
Okay, I have to say, Boomer warned me that this beer she brought home this week was especially alcoholic. And I guzzled it anyway. And I was already weakened by my tick paranoia today. I am TOTALLY sloshed right now. I am RIPE FOR THE PICKING, Tranny Brides!
CBC opened their broadcast with a shot from behind of Sid running. My jaw is still on the floor.
HOLY CRAP! DAMN YOU, VERSUS. We did NOT get any caboosage.
WHAT?!? I WANT CBC!
(I’ve also had too much of this super-alcohol beer.)
Damn! How did I miss the caboose!!!
And, Danny Briere playing wing? Whoa. Desperate times…
Shit! I lost track of time! I get CBC and I still missed Sid’s sweet little behind. Boooo.
Did anyone see that photoshop on Pensblog where it said Danny Be Where on the back of his sweater? Heh.
THe Pens have a 1-2-2? Wha-huh???
Unlike the Detroit series, I wouldn’t mind if I was wrong about the outcome of this series and the Pens swept the Flyers.
Has anyone else here read Bill Simmons’s column about the opposite of being clutch? Where he tried to coin a term that would apply for the big star player who can always be counted on to blow it at key moments? He came up with “botch”. As in, “Look at Briere taking this penalty early. Always coming through in the botch, is Briere.”
IT’S ALL MY FAULT! I’M SORRY! I NEVER SHOULD’VE SAID THE “S” WORD!
Holy flirking schnitt, that was an insane goal!
Anne, did you bring a broom? :P
Don’t worry, Anne. If the Tranny Brides win this game it will be because of the morons who brought brooms to the arena.
If it helps I can’t find the broom in my house!
I don’t want the Tranny Brides to win ANY games ever again!
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Kate you would’ve really loved the 06-07 season for the Flyers then
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! :PPPPPPP
BLAH
(I actually don’t care about that goal because my Flyer boyfriend had nothing to do with it.)
:PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
Briere LOVER!
Also, if the Flyers win, the official IPB stance is that the Pens are taking a dive so the NHL can have another game on NBC. They did it in the Rangers series, so I would totally believe they’d do it again in this one.
This game is a little bit INSANE!
THe Pens have a 1-2-2? Wha-huh???
Of course they don’t, Schnookie! You were clearly seeing things. Baby Hockey Jesus would never let his team do that.
Remember how people were saying recently the Penguins were actually good defensively? heh.
I’ll buy that.
I only love one of Briere’s TEAMMATES! Please! It’s not Richards’s fault that his team signed someone as pukey as Briere!