This is the fifth in our summer series in which we are drawing hockey cards at random from a box and writing about them.
Today’s draw proves that Project Bicycle Spoke is on the cutting edge of hockey news, as the BPS box vomited up a timely card today: Dominik Hasek. And by “timely” we mean “time has run out”. And by “vomited” we mean… well, vomited. This is Hasek we’re talking about. We decided to channel our own Inner Haseks, and didn’t bother scanning the card for you to enjoy, but trust us when we tell you that the back says, “The ageless wonder is one of the game’s unique stars, doing it his own way for nearly two NHL decades. No leaks have formed in the wall he presents in front of the goal.” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Hasek really is the gift that keeps on giving! We’re assuming when we unpacked these cards we threw out the slip of paper with the asterisk that read: “Warning: Some leaks may form in wall.” That guy is consistently hilarious.
Anyway, the front of the card features a prominent, glowing-red five-hole and Hasek in a pose that just screams, “If I flop over right now, I’ll draw a call, right? No, I mean a call against the other team.” We’d say we’re sorry this is the last way we’re going to see him, on this “Hot Prospect” card (and as an aside, the “Hot Prospect” people should realize words have meanings, and their choice to go with a brand name “Hot Prospect” leads to massive confusion. We find it hard to believe that no one figured this out ahead of time), but we fully expect a return of Hasek some time around mid-February next year. If we were the talent selectors for a hockey card company, we’d bank on it, and be sure to include Hasek in our full 2008-2009 line. So confident are we of his Forsbergian intentions to return after the meat of the season is behind us all, that we are encasing his Hot Prospectness in macaroni, the highest honor Project Bicycle Spoke can bestow on a player.
(Warning: Being encased in macaroni might not actually be a high honor at all.)