This is the 19th in our summer series in which we are drawing hockey cards at random from a box and writing about them.
Dear Crunchy,
How do I get toothpaste out of a shag carpet?
Doreen G., Joliet IL
Dear Doreen,
How did you end up with toothpaste in your shag carpet? What kind of moron lets their toothpaste get close to a shag carpet in the first place? Unless you’re a total nitwit and have shag carpeting in your bathroom, in which case you’re beyond all hope. Soon I’m going to have a huge new contract that will allow me to just replace any shag carpeting that gets toothpaste in it (or replace whatever fat idiot friend of mine would put the toothpaste there, because there’s no way I would screw up my toothpaste and my carpeting, because I’m not stupid), but I’m assuming you’re poorer and fatter than me, so you’re going to have to clean your carpet out. I have no idea how. It’s not a situation I think I’ll ever find myself in.
–Crunchy
Dear Crunchy,
I just purchased a classic tweed suit. Is it safe to hand wash it, or should it only be dry-cleaned?
Glenda C., Lexington, KY
Dear Glenda,
If you’re wearing clothes correctly, you should never have to wash them at all. And by “wearing clothes correctly” I mean “wearing them only once”. Only fat people wear the same article of clothing twice. And you should bear in mind that classic tweed suits are not stylish. The only kind of tweed you should ever wear is a tweed boob hoodie.
–Crunchy
Dear Crunchy,
I’m hosting dinner for my husband’s new boss and his wife. What would be an appropriate menu for such an occasion given that the boss’s wife is a vegan? I’ve never cooked a vegan meal before.
Yvonne G., Omaha, NE
Dear Yvonne,
I have an idea, why don’t you host non-dinner for your husband’s new boss? Why does everyone feel the need to be eating dinner every night? I mean, every night? Good grief, fatties, give it a rest! Invite your husband’s new boss (why does he have a new boss? Was he not good enough for his old job? Was it because he was spending too much time eating dinner and not enough working? Probably. In fact, nothing you say will convince me otherwise) into your home and offer him an empty plate of delicious nothingness. He’ll be so impressed with your commitment to not being a stupid fatty that he’ll give your husband a raise. Also, his wife will appreciate that no vegetables were harmed.
–Crunchy
Dear Crunchy,
I found a $100 bill on the floor of the mailroom at my office. I posted a “found” notice but no one has claimed it. How long should I wait before claiming the bill as my own?
Billy P., Crested Butte, CO
Dear William (seriously, a grown man going by “Billy”? UNACCEPTABLE!),
First of all, what were you doing in the mailroom? Life can’t be all about walking and mailing stuff. Get out to the rest of your office before you turn into a postal moleman. Also, I think that $100 is yours to spend. On 1/8 of a boob hoodie from the Refinery. Life can be about driving around and buying boob hoodies. Trust me. I know these things. Because I’m not a postal-worker half-mole-half-man.
–Crunchy
Dear Crunchy,
I inherited an antique silver ice-cream scoop collection from my late, beloved grandmother. What is the best way to display them while also protecting them from the ravages of time?
Beverly M., Elk River, MN
Dear Beverly,
For God’s sake melt them down! You don’t want to get fat, do you?
–Crunchy
Dear Crunchy,
I own an African Gray Parrot. Can you recommend a way to teach it how to talk? I’d like to be able to impress friends with him when I hostess cocktail parties.
Oriel P., Sarasota, FL
Dear Oriel,
Are you not interesting enough to impress your friends with your own talking? Are you really so pathetic that you have to rely on a bird to make a good social impression? Remind me to never attend any of your cocktail parties.
–Crunchy
I can’t quite describe the shiver of delight I experienced upon realizing that it was CRUNCHY who emerged from the PBS box today. “Oooooh,” I thought, “this is going to be delightful, CLASSIC, marvelous, perfect IPB!” And it was. :D
…also, I am saving my pennies for 1/8 of a tweed boob hoodie. I can’t wait.
I’m starting small and am saving for 1/16th of a boob hoodie.
(And thanks for liking the post! It was shockingly fun to write. Crunchy’s the gift who keeps on giving!)
Hee! I’m so glad you liked it! We could have written all night, but had a bit of a dinner emergency, so it cut us short. This was so much fun to compose! :D
And aren’t we ALL saving up for 1/8 of a tweed boob hoodie?
I seriously savored every word. I purposefully read slowly to make it last.
Wait, I’m sorry — did I just say that we wrote this? No, we intercepted it. This was written by Crunchy!
Well, I’m glad you read slowly — it’s not a very long post! :P
Maybe we should pool our resources. I mean, all we need are five more friends and we’ve got ourselves a boob hoodie.
Oh right! We had nothing to do with it! We didn’t so much pull the Crunchy card out of the PBS Box as we pulled a whole stack of letters. Um… Look at that hobo in a boob hoodie!
We can have a Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie!
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: You must have spent a lot of time puffing Crunchy up for his new advice column gig. I mean, the dude needs a lot of attention in order to get anything done.
:^:::::::::: I want to be in the Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie.
Part of me can’t believe we’re about to pay this guy six million plus :P
Heather, life can’t be all about driving around believing things.
I mean, the dude needs a lot of attention in order to get anything done.
While attention is a strong motivator for Crunchy, cutting people down is an even stronger one. You’d be surprised what lengths he’ll go to just to call other people fat.
The Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie? COUNT ME IN! :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie.
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A hearty :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: to the whole post. Crunchy is definitely the new incarnation of Emily Post.
What would Crunchy think about the Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie?
You guys, can I just say for a moment that I’m really, really tired of the “No one wants to play in Buffalo!” discussion. I feel like it’s EVERYWHERE! Make it stop!
I’m almost tempted to get a boob hoodie just so we can have one to travel between us. Of course, I’d probably need to buy two and sew them together so it would fit. Or maybe even three.
Sorry, Schnookie, but The Refinery Dot Com has a strict one-boob-hoodie-per-bloggerhood limit.
Heather, I’m tired of it too, but I talk about it rationally. I’m not ready to roast Greg W. over an open fire yet.
Heather, I’m tired of the “no one wants to play in Buffalo” thing on your behalf. I’ve been waiting for you to bring it up! :P (I thought that was ESPECIALLY disingenuous of Bucky to compare the Sabres to the Red Wings. I mean, the Wings are the undisputed best-run team in hockey, or maybe even all sports. That’s like grousing that a painting’s no good because it’s not the Mona Lisa. I mean, come ON, Bucky.)
Sorry, Schnookie, but The Refinery Dot Com has a strict one-boob-hoodie-per-bloggerhood limit.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: He’s so clever, finding ways to keep his clothes off fatties.
I wouldn’t roast Greg over an open fire, either. I liked how his “No one’s signing with these teams THIS SUMMER” post pointed out that it’s all cyclical. Some of the other “no one wants to play in Buffalo” commentary has made it sound like it’s an immutable state.
I didn’t even read Bucky’s column and I STILL can’t get away from it.
Amy, if everyone was approaching it as rationally as you, it would be fine :-D I was trying to avoid talking about it but I might have to. Crap.
The Refinery Dot Com has a strict one-boob-hoodie-per-bloggerhood limit.
Ha! He’s kind of biting off his nose to spite his face here. That limit totally decreases sales.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HILARIOUS!
And excellent use of “Omaha, NE”. A classic place for an advice-seeker to be from. “Sarasota, FL” is not bad, either. :D
Maybe we should go the route of a Flat Boob-Hoodie. And just take pictures of our boob hoodie in various locations.
(Like Flat Stanley? In case that’s a regional thing y’all haven’t heard of.)
(Oh, never mind. It’s not that funny.)
Thinking up the places the advice-seekers are from was something I could do ALL DAY. Our friend Sarah gets this hilarious cooking magazine called “A Taste Of Home”, which is all REALLY retro recipes, but for people who aren’t consciously retro. She sends me especially hilarious clippings of people giving cooking tips or asking for recipes, and they’re all from the most stereotypical places. I think it’s all fake, actually. (And these people seem not to have heard of the internet. They’ll seriously ask, “I’m looking for the peach gelatin pie that my mother-in-law used to make for my husband’s birthday when he was a child. Does anyone know the recipe?” Dude, go down to your local public library if you don’t know how to use a computer yourself and google it! It’s not that hard!)
Patty, I briefly worried that Omaha wasn’t in NE and that NE wasn’t the abbreviation for Nebraska. Hee.
I’ve seen that magazine! Those are totally fake letters! They’d have to be!
They use semi-obscure towns. They think you’ll know it’s fake if they say New York City, NY. But if you go SO small, like Cut-and-Shoot, TX, you’ll assume it’s fake then, too. So they go with Omaha, NE. :D
Omaha is like a fake advice-letter-writer’s dream come true!
And Sarah and I keep wondering if “Taste Of Home” is for real. It’s hard to believe it could be.
I got suspicious when they used “Tasteofhomeville, SK”.
I got suspicious when they used “Tasteofhomeville, SK”.
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Dear Crunchy,
I like being fat. People say all the time, “Look at that jolly ol’ fat guy”. Then some skinny teenager walks by and they say, “Look at the scrawny depressed emo kid”. See that, fat=jolly and scrawny=depressed. Do I just live in a twilight zone?
Bubba J. , Bacon, MD.
P.S. Oreil P., I totally read that as:
I own an African Gay Parrot.
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Beautiful!
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:::::::::::::::OH MY GOSH……I AM HYPERVENTILATING……….
The Bloggerhood of the Traveling Boob Hoodie? COUNT ME IN!
ME TO!
Maybe we should go the route of a Flat Boob-Hoodie. And just take pictures of our boob hoodie in various locations.
(Like Flat Stanley? In case that’s a regional thing y’all haven’t heard of.)
(Oh, never mind. It’s not that funny.)
OH, Yes it is!!!
I own an African Gay Parrot.
Okay, ya’ll are just killing me…………….
Me thinks I’m even more glad to not be moving to Crunchyland. Hub would be the only one who could go in his store. I would get run out for being too short and wide!
Oreil’s parrot is totally gay but that is neither here nor there when it comes to advice about it talking.
Dear Frisby,
Yes, you live in the twilight zone. Also, you’re wrong. And crazy. Crazy like a loon. Crazy like an African Gay Loon, which is only the craziest of all the loons.
– Crunchy
Ookies, I thought y’all might appreciate this. DMFB (formerly Pleasure Motors) over at Covered in Oil described Jason Smith this way:
“Jason Smith, former Oilers captain and all-around gentleman badass, the type of man potent enough to impregnate the entire Edmonton Eskimos cheerleading squad with nothing but an arched eyebrow and a smile and stand-up enough to raise every last one of those children to full maturity, ensuring they grow up with solid morals and a healthy respect for their elders.”
Good morning, everyone! Patty, that is a perfect description of Jason Smith (although probably less so now that he’s a Sen. And he failed to mention that the Devils dislocated BOTH of his shoulders in one game late this past season; if the soft-hitting Devils are doing that kind of damage to you, you are, perhaps, not the badass you once were… :P) — too funny!
How is everyone’s Wednesday so far? I totally feel like it’s early September today, so I’m going to be in for a surprise in three weeks when I wake up and it’s not the hockey season. Heh.
Super Funny post girls!! Captures Ryan’s crankiness perfectly!
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Dying, not breathing
How is everyone’s Wednesday so far?
So far so good! Mom and I went to the farmer’s market and bought a LOT of veggies and fruit, most of which has already been eaten, and I made apricot/blueberry crumble. It’s yuuummyyyyy.
Thanks, Erin!
And Mags, that sounds like a delicious outing indeed! Apricot-Bluberry Crumble? Mmmmmm….
I really, really does feel like September today. Oh how I wish it were so that it would mean I wouldn’t have to fly down to New Orleans for 36 hours this weekend!
I’m NOT looking forward to New Orleans.
But what else is new? :p
I’m NOT looking forward to New Orleans.
Weren’t you guys like…just there? Surely you shouldn’t be going back so soon! :p
I’m NOT looking forward to New Orleans.
I can’t remember a single time since I’ve known you that you’ve looked forward to New Orleans :) (which all in all, doesn’t mean much because it’s only been a year and then some, but what gives?)
I took pictures of the crumble, will upload them in a second :D
Weren’t you guys like…just there? Surely you shouldn’t be going back so soon!
I KNOW! We got guilted into going again. We were there last in, I think, January? Or was it March? I think it was January, and them the previous March before that. Or something. It’s all a blur. Poor Boomer was down there with KtG just a couple of weeks ago, actually. We’re vowing now that we will NOT get guilted into going down during the next hockey season, and this is our last visit until next June. I hope I can stand fast on that promise to myself, because we say this every time we go down there, and then in four or five months, like clockwork, someone in the family makes it sound like we’re being terribly neglectful by not visiting more often.
(which all in all, doesn’t mean much because it’s only been a year and then some, but what gives?)
Hee! It feels much longer than a year, though, doesn’t it? In a good way, of course. That sounds awful — like, “Gah! This year I’ve been hanging out with you has felt like an ETERNITY!” — but it actually just feels like we’ve all known each other a lot longer than we have! :D
And I can’t wait to see the crumble!!
How is everyone’s Wednesday so far?
My boss got me early birthday flowers today so it at least started out well. Unfortunately it’s been a bit downhill from there. But we’re going out for a department lunch which is always nice. :)
And this post was hugely enjoyable.
Oooh! How nice of your boss! And department lunch sounds grand! Sorry about the “a bit downhill from there”, though, Meg. (When’s your birthday? How come I don’t know this?)
I’m glad you liked the post!
we say this every time we go down there, and then in four or five months, like clockwork, someone in the family makes it sound like we’re being terribly neglectful by not visiting more often.
Aak, I know that feeling. It’s how I got guilted into taking time off from camp in Montreal to go see my extended family. Never mind that half of them have no idea what I look like.
It feels much longer than a year, though, doesn’t it?
Yeah, but totally in a good way. I think there’s something to be said for spending so much time around each other and not being driven completely insane by one another (at least, that’s what usually happens to me. I fail at personal relationships because I tire of people. Then again, most people appear not to share hobbies or interests with me). IPB is awesome.
Happy ALMOST birthday, Meg!
IPB is awesome.
You’ll get no argument from me on that front! :D
Never mind that half of them have no idea what I look like.
Hee! And really, who wants to make the effort to visit family who will then look at you and say, “And who are you again?” :P (Our visits to N.O. are really annoying because our grandmother likes the idea of seeing us but not the reality of it. So we have awkward, stilted conversations for a few hours, sit around staring at each other in disappointed silence for a few more, then we finally get up to leave and she wails that we only ever stay for such a short time. Dude. Just… dude.)
(When’s your birthday? How come I don’t know this?)
Oh, it’s not until Saturday. This was just the day that everyone could make it to lunch.
I think the day is on its way back up. We just have some huge rush titles that always stress me out (they also always work out fine in the end though).
Thanks, Mags.
I’ll save my birthday wishes, then, until closer to Saturday! You’ll get no advance on your “happy birthday”s from me, young lady! :P
Whoa, happy almost birthday, Meg! Are you doing anything fun and exciting on Saturday?
Mags, it does seem a lot longer than a year, doesn’t it? How time flies when we’re having fun!
And really, who wants to make the effort to visit family who will then look at you and say, “And who are you again?” :P
Apparently they know who I am because I’m grand mère’s fave (this will never make sense to me. My French sucks, and she hates girls who play hockey. But whatever, I’ll take it :D) but they haven’t seen me in about 10 years. The last time we met I think I still had waist length blond hair and spoke with a lisp.
Dude. Just… dude.
Word.
Anyway, crumble.
Ooooh! Fancy crumble! It looks delish!!!
Whoa, happy almost birthday, Meg! Are you doing anything fun and exciting on Saturday?
Thanks. Nothing special but I think my roommate is planning on buying chocolate cake. Although really, good chocolate cake is pretty fun and exciting. And my parents will be in a little later in the week so I’m sure we’ll go out to dinner or something.
Mags, that crumble looks deeeelicious.
Mmmmm… chocolate cake. I think that sounds extremely fun and exciting!
Although really, good chocolate cake is pretty fun and exciting.
Very much so :D
Thanks for the compliments re:the crumble. I wish I could share it with all y’all, because it’s nommy :D
Chocolate cake is a great birthday celebration! Early Happy B-day! Meg!
Mags, your crumble looks yummy. Plus, Kid and I had never seen the Boxworthy pics, they were hilarious!
Good morning all! Got to catch an hour of the Stars’ Development Camp, yesterday! I have a terrible case of hockey fever now. We finally got my blog set up and I did a post on it! Wooo! Scary!!!!!!!
We finally got my blog set up and I did a post on it!
*runs over to laughs2loud* Awesome! Congrats on the blog :D
laughs2loud looks great Myra! Congratulations, and welcome to the wonderful world of blogging! I hope it brings you as much joy as it’s brought us (although I hope you don’t become as obsessed as we are… :P)!
Oh, and I have to say that your post about the prospect camp has me just going CRAZY with nostalgia for last September, when we went to Caps camp and Devils camp. It was bad enough that today looks and feels like September! Now I’m in full on Fall-Longing mode! :D
Thanks everyone! I think the obsession has already begun because I’m lying awake at night thinking of things to write.
We are in full out “We want Hockey, Now!” mode. Kid has even been googling for new ice skates and asking about girls’ hockey leagues. Mind you, she has only been ice skating ONCE!
We met with Patty, Caitlin, Cat & Jen Sunday night and talked hockey for 3 hours. Add to that activities of yesterday and I am so ready for the season to begin! Plus it’s supposed to be 100 everyday for the near future so I want September now!!!
I think the obsession has already begun because I’m lying awake at night thinking of things to write.
HAHAHA!!! Welcome to my world! :D
I’m so jealous, by the way, that y’all in the Dallas contingent got to hang out. I can’t wait for our trip down there now, either.
I had been surprisinly mellow about summer, and don’t get me wrong — I’m really enjoying the off-season. I mean, after a full season of 7:00 starts, I’m loving being able to be lazy about getting dinner cooked and eaten before Game Diary time. But all these little things about fall are starting to creep into the edges of my consciousness now, and I’m becoming increasingly antsy for it. As for you and the Kid, Myra, I remember my first off-season well. It couldn’t pass fast enough. :D
I think the obsession has already begun because I’m lying awake at night thinking of things to write.
I get that too, but I don’t write a hockey blog. Which reminds me, I should go and actually do stuff that is worth writing a blog post about *sigh*. Endless playing on the Wii and shopping aren’t really inspirational blogging, at least not in my mind.
I’m so jealous, by the way, that y’all in the Dallas contingent got to hang out.
Me too. Much more jealouser than Schnookie too, because I didn’t get to go to the Draft *weeps* (I kid. But I really do want to meet the gang some day)
Endless playing on the Wii and shopping aren’t really inspirational blogging
That’s never stopped me! :PPP
Myra, your blog looks great! Welcome to the Starsogosphere! (It doesn’t really work as well as “Oilogosphere”. Heh.)
When I first started I had a few ideas, then I figured I’d lose interest, but it’s been really fun. It’s a very good outlet for frustrated hockey feelings. :D
And I like your avatar a lot. You can see Otter’s beard now.
That’s never stopped me! :PPP
Have you ever blogged about the Wii? If you have, God I must be going senile, since I don’t remember. Besides, I’m a SUCKY gamer, especially with Lara Croft since I never seen to be able to aim properly. And shopping, well, let’s just say I had an accident with my credit card and the most beautiful winter coat I’ve ever seen (yes, winter coat. In July) yesterday. There, that’s like, 6 lines. That’s not a blog post! *mopewhinebitchcomplain*
Ok, I’m done now. I wish I was like Katebits and you guys. You can write about anything and make it hilarious. (nope, not done) (will go whine elsewhere now) (and eat my own body weight in crumble)
Schnookie, I cannot believe you and Pookie are going to N.O. in July. I can’t think of a worse part of the year for it. :D
Myra, get prepared for the ensuing addiction to blogging. I have eight million blogs, it seems, and I’m debating starting up a personal WordPress blog because my LiveJournal paid account just expired and I’m beginning to hate LiveJournal. If you really like it…it will take over a large chunk of your life.
I feel kind of sad now. :p
I think we’ve blogged more than our fair share about Katamari here! There’s no shame in blathering on endlessly about the video games you suck at! (Okay, there probably is some shame in it, but I’m too oblivious to see it. :P) (I’m jealous of the winter coat, by the way. I’ve been meaning to get a new one for years, but I just can’t ever seem to find what I’m looking for.)
Patty, everyone in our family said the same thing when we were like, “FINE. We’ll visit. In July. Happy now?” But really, we’re just going to be sitting in an air conditioned house for 24 hours, with some time in an air conditioned hotel and more time in an air conditioned airport tacked onto the sides. We could be going ANYWHERE. It’s not like we’re planning a day of frolicking in the French Quarter or anything. Although there’s a hurricane puttering around down there somewhere right now, isn’t there? That’s the worst part about having to make family-duty trips down there. I hate going during the hockey season, but the off-season is hurricane season. I’d say I’m hoping we can’t go this weekend because of the hurricane, but then that would just mean we’d have to postpone the trip for a time of year during which I have a zillion other things on my docket. SIGH. My life is so hard, isn’t it? :P
Myra, get prepared for the ensuing addiction to blogging. I have eight million blogs, it seems, and I’m debating starting up a personal WordPress blog
The “adding new blogs” thing was something I really never expected, but it’s just so easy! And really, I spend almost as much time working on and thinking about IPB Living now as I do IPB proper. Blogging is like a drug!
I can definitely see how this can become an addiction. Thanks, Patty, I love my avatar! I kept looking until I found one that I thought would be big enough to see his beard and his number. I mean, what is Ott without his trolly beard.
Mags, Kid and I want to know, did you knit Boxworthy yourself? He is adorable.
That’s the worst part about having to make family-duty trips down there. I hate going during the hockey season, but the off-season is hurricane season.
Yes, Katrina was very bad, but a) it was the first big one in tens of years, and b) there was plenty of warning for people to leave. Like most hurricanes. Especially if you don’t live there. Even if that hurricane out in the Atlantic where to stay big and make a course for the Gulf, and stick to it, you’ll have enough time to walk to safety if you need to. So don’t worry about the hurricanes.
But do worry about possible heat stroke in various parking lots as you go from air-conditioned building to air-conditioned car and back. :P
I’m beginning to hate LiveJournal.
What’re your reasons? I kinda hate them too, but I’m all “but my f-list” about it. I should probably let that go.
I think we’ve blogged more than our fair share about Katamari here!
Have you? I know you’ve mentioned it a bunch, that’s true. And you seem to get somewhere with Katamari, whereas my Lara Croft blog over the past 3 days would have been “We just got through the third room in Midas’ Palace, and now we can’t get the fuck out of the room above it. Effing gorilla’s are cramping our style, and added to that, Lara has aim issues. How hard can it be to grapple and jump just a leeeeettle to the right?!”. So yes. Lots of anger there. (I’m perfectly happy with my red winter coat, but it just… the black one was gorgeous. It doesn’t happen very often that something HAS to come home with me, and I’m a bit embarrassed by it)
My life is so hard, isn’t it? :P
Painfully! I have no idea how you get through the day ;P
WERE to stay big… not WHERE to stay big… Sheesh.
Mags, Kid and I want to know, did you knit Boxworthy yourself? He is adorable.
I did! He was a labour of love, that little turtle. I sewed a little number patch onto his back a while ago, but have decided it isn’t accurate enough, so I have to find some more felt and replace it. And I’m going to replace the logo on his belly and his name plate with proper ones. Once I find scissors small enough to cut everything out :)
Great post ookies! I knew Ryan Miller was a cranky bitch, but I had no idea just how cranky. Also, I’m thinking that the tweed boob hoodie is about to blow up the fashion world. It’ll be like the new hula-hoop.
Happy early brithday Meg! You have the same birthday as my brother! It’s crazy, I tell you.
Mags, if I had a sweet tooth, I’d be hitting you up for air-mail baked goods all the time. I swear to god.
New blog looks great Myra! Although, are you dead set on it being a Stars-centric blog? The Sharkogosphere could always use a new voice! (Wow, that actually sounds lamer than Starsogosphere)
Everyone else, good morning! It’s gonna be a great day! I don’t know why…just seems like it.
So don’t worry about the hurricanes.
Oh, I’m not worried about being stuck in some kind of Katrina-style disaster. But we’ve had enough hurricane-related travel headaches over the years that I hate having to go down there in the summertime just because of the threat of weather problems. There’s the threat of flights down there being canceled, thereby forcing us to reschedule our trip for another weekend (no mean feat when Pookie has to work as many Saturdays as she does, which means we’d be looking into September, probably, which would then throw a spanner in the works for our planned Buffalo trip), and then there’s the threat of flights being delayed or re-routed on the way back, something I am not constitutionally well-equipped to deal with. I just hate flying anywhere, and hurricanes only add to my anxiety about all the stupid things that can go wrong and make my weekend miserable. I’m too much of a cranky old lady to deal with airports or airplanes or not being at home. :D
Oh hey, Emery is off to Russia. Bye Ray!
Mags, if I had a sweet tooth, I’d be hitting you up for air-mail baked goods all the time. I swear to god.
Awww, thanks Andrew! Erm, I cook other food too! None of that keeps as well in the mail though, sorry.
Oh, okay. I hate to say it, then, Schnookie, but that’s a perfectly legitimate worry.
Maybe this will be a hurricane-sparse summer, like last summer.
It doesn’t happen very often that something HAS to come home with me, and I’m a bit embarrassed by it.
I know that feeling well. There’s a pair of shoes I saw back before we knew about the job, so I passed them up. I went back later and they didn’t have them anymore. (they were almost out of season when I first saw them, so definitely were now.) I’m sure it was for the best but I still want them.
But do worry about possible heat stroke in various parking lots as you go from air-conditioned building to air-conditioned car and back.
That is so true!
Oh, Ookies, I don’t know if ya’ll are into French Impressionism but the Kimbell has a big new exhibit on now until Nov 2nd. So if you came in October, you could catch that. Just FYI.
I’m thinking that the tweed boob hoodie is about to blow up the fashion world. It’ll be like the new hula-hoop.
I can see this happening, and Crunchy better cut us in on the profits. If he doesn’t, I’ll teach him a thing or two about being a cranky bitch.
I think Sharkogosphere and Starsogosphere are delightful words! We decided that Devilsogosphere is just lame, so playing on the bibliogosphere that Pookie dabbles in as a librarian, we decided to dub our end of the blog pool the “Diablogosphere”. It… hasn’t caught on. But we also haven’t talked it up much. Yet.
It’s gonna be a great day! I don’t know why…just seems like it.
I’ve been having a delightful day, so I think you’re right!
And happy birthday this weekend, Meg! Whoever decided birthdays should be represented by cake was a genius. :D
Crunchy better cut us in on the profits. If he doesn’t, I’ll teach him a thing or two about being a cranky bitch.
Woah, them’s fighting words!
Ok, I’m off to see Hancock. Anyone who has seen it, is it any good? Well, I suppose it doesn’t matter, because we have tickets and Flutter wants to go. See you in a couple of hours!
Whoever decided birthdays should be represented by cake was a genius. :D
I don’t know who, but I’m pretty sure they were German. Which isn’t strange, because the Germans make AWESOME kuchen (that’d be cake) :D
Maybe this will be a hurricane-sparse summer, like last summer.
They can have all the hurricanes they like. Just not this weekend. :P
Myra, I just checked out the Kimball’s website — that’s a fantastic collection the Art Institute of Chicago’s got. I’ve seen it in Chicago, and let me tell you, it’s worth checking out while it’s in town in Dallas!
…we decided to dub our end of the blog pool the “Diablogosphere”.
Genius! I think you’re on to something there.
I think Sabres fans should go with Buffalogosphere. Anyone?…Hello?….
I’ve been having a delightful day, so I think you’re right!
Word! I thought my happiness just stemmed from tomorrow being a telecommute day, but maybe there is some strange goings on that will ensure everyone has a good day. it’s in the air.
I thought my happiness just stemmed from tomorrow being a telecommute day, but maybe there is some strange goings on that will ensure everyone has a good day. it’s in the air.
I thought my happiness stemmed from finally having that stupid medical-imaging presentation behind me (there were many weeks of high-level stress leading up to it), but I think you’re probably right and there’s something in the air. Or it’s just happiness that I’m not in New Orleans right now. Hm. That could be it…
“Buffalogosphere” is fantastic! And it covers all other kinds of blogs, too! It’s so much more inclusive than team-specific -ogospheres.
What’re your reasons? I kinda hate them too, but I’m all “but my f-list” about it. I should probably let that go.
Oh, for when you get back: I just don’t like their templates, no sir. Everything feels…clunky to me. Add in the fact that I paid $20 for basically extra space and more icons? I can get a better deal on WordPress free for what LJ offers without having to have a “plus” account or whatever, if I choose not to pay.
Irritating, because I paid that money for a year and then began to hate LJ so much I never posted. Which is sad, because I usually have a lot of personal pictures I’d like to upload….and stuff. So, there you go.
I’d be all about “but my f-list too” but you, Cat & Jen are pretty much the only people on my f-list I read save for two other people, who could easily access a WordPress blog. :p
Welcome to the Starsogosphere!
Agreed, Myra – welcome and YAY!
(It doesn’t really work as well as “Oilogosphere”. Heh.)
Twinkleogosphere? :p
…but I think you’re probably right and there’s something in the air.
Lots of smoke. That’s what’s in the air! These wildfires are almost covering the entire damn state now. I’m living under a blanket of ash, feels like Vesuvius and shit.
Or it’s just happiness that I’m not in New Orleans right now. Hm. That could be it…
I hear you there. I dread the ole’ family visits too. The travel just stinks. You’re flying right? Do you at least have decent flights? No layovers, not too early on the departure times?
New blog looks great Myra! Although, are you dead set on it being a Stars-centric blog? The Sharkogosphere could always use a new voice! (Wow, that actually sounds lamer than Starsogosphere)
Thanks, Andrew, but I don’t think the George Bush Tollway goes far enough for me to get to the Sharks’ practice. My brain and tongue can’t even figure out how to say Sharkogosphere and Starsogosphere.
We are definitely going to the new exhibit at the Kimbell. Kid just groaned at that. I’ve been dragging her to art exhibits since she was 3 months old, where she proceeded to spit up the entire time. Apparently, she has never been a big art fan. :)
Dallas Stars alert. Sean Avery is going to be on the Ticket at 2:10. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG!!!!!!! But I will be listening. The other day, Hub came home and said Brenden Morrow had been on the other sports radio station that day. I was all, “What you didn’t call me!” I need material!!!
Goddamnit, I really wish Heika would stop talking about Russian retiring after this season. Sweater Vest is starting to upset me with his talks of cap space being available if Russian does not come back.
we decided to dub our end of the blog pool the “Diablogosphere”. It… hasn’t caught on. But we also haven’t talked it up much. Yet.
This? Is awesome. I wish we could have something rad like that for the Stars. Instead we have…nothing. :P It should catch on! Y’all should talk that up. :D
Thanks, Andrew, but I don’t think the George Bush Tollway goes far enough for me to get to the Sharks’ practice.
It’s cool Myra. Hell, I can’t even get to Sharks practice. 2.5 hours is a bit far to drive…
feels like Vesuvius and shit.
I shouldn’t laugh, but… :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
As for our travel, I think Philadelphia is the last airport that still flies direct into New Orleans. That airport is IMPOSSIBLE to get to. So at least we have that to cling to. Our flights are not first thing in the morning, and that’s part of what troubles me. The one on the way down is early enough in the day that I don’t think we’ll get held up by weather, but the one on the way back will probably be a total headache what with the standard afternoon thunderstorms in Philly. Basically, there’s no way this goes off without a hitch. I will have EARNED my week of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself next week!
Apparently, she has never been a big art fan. :)
HAHAHA!!!!! Poor Kid. Well, I hope she enjoys the Impressionists exhibit. The Impressionists aren’t my favorite, but this particular collection is pretty damn impressive.
Our flights are not first thing in the morning, and that’s part of what troubles me. The one on the way down is early enough in the day that I don’t think we’ll get held up by weather, but the one on the way back will probably be a total headache what with the standard afternoon thunderstorms in Philly.
That sucks that you still have to factor weather into your flights in the middle of the damn Summer. Winter out there is bad too, isn’t it? I have to ask, when is the weather nice on the East Coast?
Speaking of lousy flights….I’m headed down south for work next Tuesday. My flight? Leaves at 6:15. In the morning. I’ll be in LA 30 minutes before I would normally be clocking in. Holy crap I don’t think I’m going to make it.
The Impressionists aren’t my favorite, but this particular collection is pretty damn impressive.
Schnookie, what is your favorite? Just curious, since you’re an Art History major and all.
Have you seen those counted cross stitch pieces you can buy where you can get the kit for the Monet, Renoir, Van Gogh paintings? It gives me a headache just looking
at them. The hell!
My flight? Leaves at 6:15. In the morning.
That’s TERRIBLE! I’m so sorry!!! (Actually, that’s my preferred time of day to fly, because if you’re on the first flight out of the day, then there’s no way you’re getting held up by accumulated airport delays. But still. It’s inhuman regardless.)
And as for flying in the East, it’s generally pretty safe in the Fall. But not too early in the Fall — could still have some lingering “summery thunderstorm systems” in September. And I’d say Spring’s safe, but you never know when that late, late snowstorm might kick up. No, it’s probably safest to be like me and try to never fly anywhere at any time. :P (And the weather itself is lovely most of the time — it’s just unfriendly to planes, is all. :D)
Lots of smoke. That’s what’s in the air! These wildfires are almost covering the entire damn state now. I’m living under a blanket of ash, feels like Vesuvius and shit.
Hearing about the fires in California and the flooding in the Midwest makes me really, really glad that Buffalo only gets snow.
I will have EARNED my week of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself next week!
Damn straight! (What really sucks though is I’m looking at really hellish days at the end of this week and the beginning of next week. This was really the worst possible weekend to have picked to go down there.)
Myra, the blog looks terrific! Congratulations on starting it!
Schnookie, what is your favorite? Just curious, since you’re an Art History major and all.
I love ancient Greek and Roman sculpture. If I’d pursued any kind of graduate work in Art History, that would have been my focus. My preference when studying art is for the thrust of it to be about the society that produced it, to study a society’s history through its art and architecture. I start to lose interest when I’m studying art for art’s sake. As for sheer aesthetics, I love everything about the Northern Renaissance.
Have you seen those counted cross stitch pieces you can buy where you can get the kit for the Monet, Renoir, Van Gogh paintings? It gives me a headache just looking at them. The hell!
Those things are INSANE.
Actually, that’s my preferred time of day to fly, because if you’re on the first flight out of the day, then there’s no way you’re getting held up by accumulated airport delays.
It would be fine if I could sleep once I got there, but noooo, I have to work! And be personable! It’s a travesty! Oh well, I’ll get over it.
Hearing about the fires in California and the flooding in the Midwest makes me really, really glad that Buffalo only gets snow.
Fires, mudslides, earthquakes, blizzards, we got all that good stuff. Hell there was even a tsunami a few decades back. One of my fire chiefs has a pretty funny e-mail signature, “California: it’s not a state, it’s an Act-of-God themepark.”
It would be fine if I could sleep once I got there, but noooo, I have to work! And be personable! It’s a travesty!
Yeah, that’s just WRONG. And terrible. I wouldn’t be able to do that at all. At about 11:00 in the morning I’d be like, “Sorry. I’m crashing now. Wake me up around 2, okay?”
“California: it’s not a state, it’s an Act-of-God themepark.”
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Myra, I’m debating whether to listen to Avery on the radio. I probably will, though.
I’m debating whether to listen to Avery on the radio. I probably will, though.
I can’t listen to the radio at work, but I have a feeling that I wouldn’t listen to him anyways for fear of scratching my own ears off.
I love ancient Greek and Roman sculpture.
How cook! I’m not very educated about art, but I do like Greek and Roman sculpture.
I’m a big history bore, though, so that’s just me. :D
I start to lose interest when I’m studying art for art’s sake.
That was the worst part of Art History classes to me. I had a hard time keeping awake because I like the extra backstory and stuff to what’s going on. Art’s reflective and indicative of society – shouldn’t you learn what in the goodness is going on to inspire that art? I can see how your one semester AH class would turn into a years-long class though. :D
It’s the same thing with regular history – I can’t stand memorizing “names and dates” kind of history, but I think there’s a lot better ways to remember all of that while learning why things happened the way they did.
“California: it’s not a state, it’s an Act-of-God themepark.”
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Patty, quite frankly, I’m dying to hear what he has to say. Next thing you know I’ll be watching TMZ and reading the Inquirer. Ugh.
I can’t stand memorizing “names and dates” kind of history
Me neither! That’s actually why I liked Art History — it was kind of just History Lite for me. I basically just studied Greek and Roman history without ever having to memorize litanies of dates and shit.
I had one prof out of all the courses I took in Art History who approached the subject material as being totally removed from its historical context. It was a 300-level Northern Renaissance course, and all she taught us about was the timeline of what had been written about all the paintings. It ended up being more historiography than history, and was DEADLY DULL. I don’t go in for that at all. But then again, I’m the kind of person who loves genre historical fiction, so I never claim to be very highbrow. :P
I can’t stand memorizing “names and dates” kind of history
Neither can I. Fortunately, I found that the further you go into history the less you have to do that. I majored in history and I can probably count the number of exact(ish) dates I remember on my fingers.
Oh, and in a totally unrelated aside, I roasted up a bunch of our potatoes from the garden to have as lunch today, and for any of you considering growing potatoes next year, Desirees are AWESOMELY DELICIOUS. Just in case anybody out there is wondering what type of potato is yummy and good for home gardens.
Fortunately, I found that the further you go into history the less you have to do that.
Dammit! If only I’d gotten past those intro courses!
California: it’s not a state, it’s an Act-of-God themepark.”
That’s brilliant.
I can’t stand memorizing “names and dates” kind of history, but I think there’s a lot better ways to remember all of that while learning why things happened the way they did.
Learning why things happened the way they did helps with the names and dates thing, in my opinion. If you know the why, you can learn the who and when.
If you know the why, you can learn the who and when.
I have a very lazy brain. I’m TERRIBLE at the who and when, no matter how much “why” I’ve got figured out. :P (Meanwhile Pookie’s got a mind like a steel trap. She still knows every single Art History date she learned in High School and college. I’m like, “Me like pretty pictures.”)
If you know the why, you can learn the who and when.
So true. That’s how I learn everything. When my programmer co-worker tells me the steps to create a Java object or something, I can’t remember it for one minute unless he tells me the whole story of what each step means. And usually he doesn’t want to do that.
(And by “he” I mean any number of programmer co-workers I have.)
and for any of you considering growing potatoes next year, Desirees are AWESOMELY DELICIOUS. Just in case anybody out there is wondering what type of potato is yummy and good for home gardens.
Oohh! Awesome. I’m about ready to pull up a bunch of my Yellow Finns. Exciting stuff.
Did you stop watering for any length of time before pulling them up? or do you just yank them out whenever.
Schnookie, I will make a mental note of those Desirees for sure! :D
I majored in history and I can probably count the number of exact(ish) dates I remember on my fingers.
Yeah, I can remember maybe a handful of dates: 1066, 1776, 1812, 1917 and 1945 are the five I can remember off the top of my head. Other than that…meh. Hey, those were all big years (well, two years are big if you’re American :p).
If you know the why, you can learn the who and when.
Exactly! My friends are always amazed at the weird stuff I remember, but I’m positive that one of the reasons I remember things is because someone told me a backstory to it.
I seem to recall Pookie saying something about stopping watering the potatoes, but typical of me, I can’t remember what it was. We didn’t really stop, and got a TON of rain recently anyway, but then we also had a pretty wide range of maturity in the potato bed. The Desirees were looking ready to pull up long before the Yellow Finns had any spuds under them. So what I’m trying to say is that we just dug the potatoes up.
I’m so excited to hear how your harvest goes, andrew!
She still knows every single Art History date she learned in High School and college.
Not true, not true! I will, however, remember until my dying day that the Marshall Fields Warehouse by H.H. Richardson was 1886, Manet’s Lucheon on the Grass was 1863, and that the Crystal Palace was 1851 (with the first passenger safety elevator being unveiled at the NYC version of the Crystal Palace two years later in 1853).
The real turning point for me was putting my interest in early skyscrapers into perspective. I was taking The History of Cities at the same time I was taking an intro history course on the American West. One day I was like, “Huh, Frederick Jackson Turner declared the West closed at the Columbian Expo in 1893. That was almost ten years after the first predecessors to skyscrapers started being built. The Marshall Fields Warehouse was built before Wounded Knee. You think of the Wild West as being such ancient history but skyscrapers (even the early ones) seem so modern. It blew my mind. And that’s my story.
I got extra credit on a theater exam once for knowing the year of the Norman Conquest. I was shocked that in a room of 13 people I was the only one.
andrew, I think you should stop watering them once the plants turn yellow and leave the spuds in the ground for two weeks or so before picking them if you want storage potatoes. We could call less about the storage life, so we just dig ours up and eat them within two weeks. Of course, we also know we have wire worms in the bed, so leaving potatoes in the ground longer than we absolutely must is a no go.
It blew my mind. And that’s my story.
Dude, that would blow my mind too! I compartmentalize history to the point where the Wild West and skyscrapers do not compute.
When Pookie first shared that sense of perspective on the timeline of late 19th-century American history with me, I nearly passed out from the sheer awesomeness of it. I mean, WHO KNEW???
I got extra credit on a theater exam once for knowing the year of the Norman Conquest. I was shocked that in a room of 13 people I was the only one.
I took a class called “World Regional Geography” in college that was basically about how geography shapes social, economic and political factors in countries. Interesting class, but since it filled a necessary freshman credit, we were all jammed into a 200 person lecture hall. The professor began to speak a little on Socrates and Plato. I guess he must have noticed some of the class looking a little confused, because he stopped writing on the board, turned around and said: “Sew-crates.”
Thirty people in the class went “Ahh!” in recognition all at once. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry that people were placing Socrates from Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. I love that movie but…oh, man.
Well, to be fair, the Marshall Fields Warehouse was only like five stories tall, but it started to usher in the technology (and aesthestics) used to build higher. And Wounded Knee happened a lot later than I would have thought. Maybe a more jarring example is that the Seagram Building, which is the example of cutting edge modern architecture was built before the Civil Rights movement. That’s crazy.
I took a class called “World Regional Geography” in college that was basically about how geography shapes social, economic and political factors in countries.
Dude! I want to take that class! Like, right now! That sounds awesome!
Maybe a more jarring example is that the Seagram Building, which is the example of cutting edge modern architecture was built before the Civil Rights movement. That’s crazy.
Pookie, I had to Google the Seagram Building, and I was shocked, mainly because I initially (like a weirdo) read that it “was built before the Civil War movement”. I’m like, “Holy cow, are you serious?! …Wait a minute…”
I guess he must have noticed some of the class looking a little confused, because he stopped writing on the board, turned around and said: “Sew-crates.”
Ouch. That’s terrible! (That course, though, sounds really interesting.)
KtG taught an intro World Politics course when she was a grad student, and relished telling us about the essay question one of her students wrote on the final exam. The question was about the effectiveness of preemptive war, and the student started out by talking about “when the Japanese dropped the atomic bomb on Pearl Harbor.”
andrew, I think you should stop watering them once the plants turn yellow and leave the spuds in the ground for two weeks or so before picking them if you want storage potatoes. We could call less about the storage life, so we just dig ours up and eat them within two weeks.
I’ll probably do a split. I planted the rows two weeks apart, so the ones that are huge right now will probably start coming out of the ground as I need them. But the ones that I planted later, I’ll most likely leave those for storage, as I’m going to have about 50 lbs of potatoes, with only 2 of us to eat them.
I want to take that class! Like, right now! That sounds awesome!
It was a freshman class though, so it was “dumbed down” a lot. Interesting stuff. Also awesome was the fact that my professor was a guy from Ireland, who I swear to god probably had to Irish up his coffee in the mornings just to make it through the class.
He suffered through a lot of painfully, woefully (sometimes offensive) questions in that class. Poor guy. But he was funny as hell!
I’m like, “Holy cow, are you serious?! …Wait a minute…”
Hee! Yes, Meis Van der Rohe was waaaay before his time! :D
The question was about the effectiveness of preemptive war, and the student started out by talking about “when the Japanese dropped the atomic bomb on Pearl Harbor.”
Dear lord. That is hilarious and tragic at the very same time.
1812
I’d love to know how many people think that the “1812 Overture” is actually about Russia and not the War of 1812.
The question was about the effectiveness of preemptive war, and the student started out by talking about “when the Japanese dropped the atomic bomb on Pearl Harbor.”
Duh. Everyone knows the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor. ;)
Best extra credit question I ever had was from an English professor: “What was the name of the MacBeth’s dog?”
I got extra credit on a theater exam once for knowing the year of the Norman Conquest.
The Norman Conquest year is my favorite date because I remember it. A co-worker has 1066 as his extension. I am really not the type that would use a date in history to remember a phone number, instead of the other way around, believe me. :D
(And now watch 1066 be the Vikings or something. For all I know, the Vikings WERE the Normans. Or were they the Cossacks? :P)
The question was about the effectiveness of preemptive war, and the student started out by talking about “when the Japanese dropped the atomic bomb on Pearl Harbor.”
Poor KtG! That reminds me of those books where they reprint the stupid shit people have said on blue book exams.
In my high school World Topics class, in which we were covering Nazi Germany, we were cramming for an essay test, when one of my classmates dropped this gem on me:
Her: “Adolf Hitler died April 20, 1955. Everyone, write that down.”
Me: “Uh…Hitler died April 30, 1945. You’re off by ten years.”
Her: “Oh come on, Hitler didn’t die until right before World War II ended!”
Thus, we had to make a timeline of world history from 1900 to the present for her. If I remember correctly, she thought we had fought the Korean War in the ’80′s.
Duh. Everyone knows the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor. ;)
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And andrew, I think I could eat 50 pounds of potatoes all by myself. :D
Yeah, I can remember maybe a handful of dates: 1066, 1776, 1812, 1917 and 1945 are the five I can remember off the top of my head.
Yeah, I’ve got those plus Easter 1916, 753 BC, 509 BC, 44 BC, and 1929. And that’s about it.
1066 is one of my favorites though because I had to read King Harald’s Saga. Icelandic Sagas are pretty interesting as far as historical documents go.
I’d love to know how many people think that the “1812 Overture” is actually about Russia and not the War of 1812.
Wait, isn’t it actually about Russia? I’m confused.
You know, Oklahoma wasn’t even a state until 1907. My grandma’s older brother was born in Indian Territory.
I’d love to know how many people think that the “1812 Overture” is actually about Russia and not the War of 1812.
Wait, isn’t it actually about Russia? I’m confused.
No, it is about Russia. But because its such a part of US patriotic lore, how many people think its about the US War of 1812.
(And now watch 1066 be the Vikings or something. For all I know, the Vikings WERE the Normans. Or were they the Cossacks? :P)
That’s about where I am, too, Patty! I’m all sitting here going, “Ah yes, OF COURSE! The Norman Conquest!” I mean, I know 1066, but why do I know it? Uhhhh… just because, apparently.
I had only one course in Art History that required specific dates; it was History of 19th Century Architecture, and I remember cramming for the final with a fellow sports fan. We made up convoluted baseball scoring plays (“the ball bounces off the pitcher and into center field, then the centerfielder accidentally throws to the third baseman, who then gets the runner out at first” for 1873) that tied in with features about the buildings to remember the dates.
And now watch 1066 be the Vikings or something.
Well, the Normans were Frenchified Vikings, weren’t they? If I remember my old-ass history correctly, but then again, I’ve burned off brain cells since then.
But because its such a part of US patriotic lore, how many people think its about the US War of 1812.
Okay, I’m just dumb, Amy, and misunderstood. Hee. It does get played a lot, doesn’t it? I never realized people actually thought it was about the War of 1812. What the hell kind of sense does that make to people?
I just like Tchaikovsky. I think we all know why. :P
That’s about where I am, too, Patty! I’m all sitting here going, “Ah yes, OF COURSE! The Norman Conquest!” I mean, I know 1066, but why do I know it? Uhhhh… just because, apparently.
1066 was both the Norman Conquest and the Vikings. Harald III of Norway invaded England in 1066 and was defeated by Harold II of England who then lost to William the Conqueror. It’s basically the end of the really bad Viking invasions as well as the beginning of Norman rule. (Look at that–I remember something!)
Well, the Normans were Frenchified Vikings, weren’t they?
Who knows. :D
It’s basically the end of the really bad Viking invasions as well as the beginning of Norman rule.
Boy, that is a turning point in history!
Wow, Meg, you’re such a smartypants! Your college education is paying off today! :D (Seriously, though, thanks for the explanation. I clearly needed it.)
1066 was both the Norman Conquest and the Vikings.
Good Lord, look at Meg go! About all I can remember is Normans, tapestries, and the Battle of Hastings.
And William the Conqueror. That’s about it.
Good Lord, look at Meg go!
Hee. It’s all because I read that Icelandic Saga I’m telling you. Icelandic Sagas give me all my best historical material. For example, did you know that in Iceland a woman could divorce her husband if he wore a shirt with a collar so wide you could see his nipples. That’s the sort of history I like.
Meg’s on fire!
I also know like none of those dates you mentioned. I saw 732 and thought, “Mohammed!” I just googled it. Yeah, I was off by 100 years. But hey, at least the “23″ part jogged something in my brain. That counts for something.
Y’all wanna hear a review of Sean Avery’s radio interview?
Ooh, ooh, Patty, do tell! Did he say that he hadn’t considered the ramifications of signing in a single-team market, and now he’s going to have to pick a feud with a teammate in order to generate national media attention because he doesn’t have any easy, more-famous-than-him local rivals?
His voice didn’t make me want to claw my ears off, but it might have helped that I couldn’t see his face.
At the end Bob was saying that he plays a game that might age him fast and asked how he felt. Avery said he felt fine but some girl recently said he looked 35 and he’s only 28. And Dan said, “As you were asking her what’s her major?” :D
Not in so many words, Schnookie, but basically. :D
I also know like none of those dates you mentioned. I saw 732 and thought, “Mohammed!” I just googled it.
Hee. The BC is the key there: founding of Rome, start of the Roman Republic, end of the Roman Republic. The didn’t make me memorize many dates in my Classics classes but those I had to remember. :)
Dude, I can’t BELIEVE Sean Avery is only 28. The girl who said he looks 35 was being generous. That tanorexia will really add years in a hurry.
I totally thought Avery was older than that too.
The BC is the key there: founding of Rome, start of the Roman Republic, end of the Roman Republic.
You probably threw Pookie off by not being PC enough. We’re very “BCE” in our household. :P (I had “BCE” drummed into my head by my 7th-grade history teacher. My almost comically conservative dad nearly threw a clot when he heard that.)
1066 was both the Norman Conquest and the Vikings. Harald III of Norway invaded England in 1066 and was defeated by Harold II of England who then lost to William the Conqueror. It’s basically the end of the really bad Viking invasions as well as the beginning of Norman rule.
By the way, I totally knew all of that. I just wanted to see if you knew, Meg. But I totally knew it.
Sean Avery and Steve Ott! Together at last!
He did say that while the fact that the Stars are a classy team and blah, blah, blah, he also was quick to point out how unique he is because he also considered the shopping and the “um… population… um, well, the girls.”
Like the Canucks have Matty schmoozing Mars Sundin, the Stars probably sent Ribeiro for the shopping and Modano for the girls.
(By the way, after all these years of Mike Modano, the “girls” in Dallas are going to be taking a huge step down, single-partying-hockey-player-wise.)
he also was quick to point out how unique he is because he also considered the shopping and the “um… population… um, well, the girls.”
The lady doth protest too much. I swear, that guy can’t go more than about ten minutes without shouting from some nearby rooftop, “No really! I TOTALLY sleep with women! I’m not gay at all!”
Exactly!!!
he also was quick to point out how unique he is because he also considered the shopping and the “um… population… um, well, the girls.”
I’m sure he’s the first hockey player ever to consider hot chicks. Really.
Also, if I wasn’t a Sabres fan I would so want Avery to go to Buffalo where he would have to, horror of horror, live without a Prada store. I imagine the suffering would be immense.
I’m sure he’s the first hockey player ever to consider hot chicks. Really.
BECAUSE HE’S TOTALLY INTO CHICKS. Totally. Chicks. Into them. He totally sleeps with them. Has he mentioned how much he’s into hot chicks? Because he is.
I wasn’t a Sabres fan I would so want Avery to go to Buffalo where he would have to, horror of horror, live without a Prada store. I imagine the suffering would be immense.
But we just got a Sephora, so at least his skin care and cosmetic needs could be met.
I’m sure he’s the first hockey player ever to consider hot chicks. Really.
After hearing that Kane talked up Chicago to Soupy, I’d be willing to bet the chick factor helped in that decision, too.
Because he’s a man. And that’s what men do.
Also, if I wasn’t a Sabres fan I would so want Avery to go to Buffalo where he would have to, horror of horror, live without a Prada store.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: That would be awesome!
BCE, CE, it’s all the same to me. (Me so smrt!)
Because he’s a man. And that’s what men do.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! And don’t you forget that about him!
And Dan said, “As you were asking her what’s her major?” :D
I said, “Yes! Good one, Dan!” Favorite part of the interview. Also, was planning on using it in my next post. :( Oh, well, I’ll probably still use it.
BECAUSE HE’S TOTALLY INTO CHICKS. Totally. Chicks. Into them. He totally sleeps with them.
He’s just pissed that he’s a few years too late to be wooed to the area by A-rod.
I would venture to guess he’s the first to consider the shopping as a factor for where he wants to move. Funny, “me thinks he doth protest too much” occured to me as well.
Still use it, Myra! Sorry about that!
I use stuff I mention here all the time. Sometimes just use copy and paste. :D
Mike Ribeiro put “shopping” as one of his hobbies in his bio, but since he has two ADORABLE little kids, I let it slide. :D And he’s not a jerk.
I use stuff I mention here all the time. Sometimes just use copy and paste. :D
Yeah, this is just the testing ground to make sure your material is good enough. :P
RE: Avery sleeping with girls. I have a friend who’s really, really into the Rangers, and she actually said to me today that if he invited her to a party, she would go and she’d, ahem, “thank him” for it too. When he was still a Ranger, she DESPISED him. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder eh?
(Hancock has it’s moments btw, but it isn’t that great. 3 pucks, methinks)
Woah, I’m sorry. Did my friend and Avery kill y’all? Please come back!
Sorry! Stupid job.
Your friend got over her hate for him right away, didn’t she? He’s only not been a Ranger for about a week. :P
I might have already mentioned this, but I showed my gay friend in San Francisco that picture of Avery from Puck Daddy where he’s wearing a suit vest and matching shorts and some kind of patent-leather clown shoes and he said that no self-respecting gay man would wear an outfit like that. :P
Mike Ribeiro put “shopping” as one of his hobbies in his bio
I think shopping is a really popular pastime for NHLers. I think there was a reason Crunchy said, “Life can’t be all about driving around buying stuff.” My impression has been that the young unmarried guys spend a depressing amount of time at the mall to kill time.
Your friend got over her hate for him right away, didn’t she? He’s only not been a Ranger for about a week. :P
I told her that and she didn’t believe me. So we went and looked it up and then she went off on a “he hasn’t been a Rangers since we exited the playoffs” rant and I zoned out. Good thing I like her ;)
I showed my gay friend in San Francisco that picture of Avery from Puck Daddy where he’s wearing a suit vest and matching shorts and some kind of patent-leather clown shoes and he said that no self-respecting gay man would wear an outfit like that. :P
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::: Bwuahahaha, Avery really is a wannabe at everything. He isn’t even properly gay!
I think shopping is a really popular pastime for NHLers.
I agree. Nazzy has one of the best wardrobes I’ve ever seen. He has the raddest sneakers evah and really nice jeans and bunny hugs. *Sigh* Nazzy. I can’t believe I don’t get to see that everyday anymore next season. Well, that slagfaced Blues loving Big Bear will just have to pick up the slack.
You’re probably right, Pookie. Especially on road trips. They can’t hang out at bars when they have to play the next day. I have heard them talk about Christmas shopping as if it’s a big deal every year. Like their respective Halloween parties.
I think they check the schedule to see which road city they want to make sure to get Christmas shopping done in.
Yeah, Big Bear! Way to show loyalty to your new team!
Hockey players have some nice wardrobes, all right. Most of them. Some aren’t very good at it and some go over the top, but the big population between those extremes dress very well.
And Nazzy’s got that awesome head of hair…
Big Bear will just have to pick up the slack.
Pfffft, he’s going to be spending a lot of time in front of the mirror at this rate. I hope he likes his own reflection.
*Tears* Don’t remind me about Nazzy’s hair. I hope he keeps it really short in New York. It’s absolutely mesmerizing when it’s a little bit long and shaggy.
Kes and Bieksa always look pretty gangsta. It’s kind of hilarious.
Trev Linden has this Hugo Boss suit that’s his “lucky suit” and oh my gosh. My ovaries go crazy, it’s so pretty.
Heh. I spend way too much time thinking about NHLers clothes apparently…
They can’t hang out at bars when they have to play the next day.
Well…
Heh.
I just meant to kill time after practice.
Well, they can’t hang out at bars, starting at 1 in the afternoon! :D
Except for a few days in January, the Stars play golf to kill time.
That suit that Butthead was wearing at the Draft, when Schnookie beat him up, that was a nice one.
the Stars play golf to kill time.
And Guitar Hero/Rock Band. I think Otter (and Smitty, when he was here) were pretty well addicted. And Modano gave an interview in which he fessed up that he and Willa had their own band for Rock Band or whatever.
Well, they can’t hang out at bars, starting at 1 in the afternoon! :D
Many of them are like, “Ummm… Look at that hobo!” :P
Not that they don’t get hammered while they’re golfing! :D
And Modano and Smitty play ping-pong in their undies. I saw video of it. Sigh.
Many of them are like, “Ummm… Look at that hobo!” :P
“It’s wearing a boob-hoodie!”
There’s nothing drunk NHLers love better than a boob hoodie.
Lately I’ve been picturing Modano and his wife sitting around the house with their pals and playing Uno into the night.
(Not that there’s anything wrong with it. In my old age, I LOVE the drunk-Uno party.)
Uno parties, eh? For some reason, I just don’t see it. :P
Yeah, cribbage parties are far more likely.
Or chess parties.
Or ABBA karoke parties for the Swedes.
alix, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Well, they can’t hang out at bars, starting at 1 in the afternoon!
I remember reading awhile ago that a lot of players were into soap operas, since it was something to kill the time.
There’s nothing drunk NHLers love better than a boob hoodie.
Next on TMZ, drunken NHLers and the boob hoodies that love them.
Ok, this “guys liking shopping” idea is kinda blowing my mind. The only guy I know who actually likes to shop is my bro-in-law. He is heavily metrosexual. He is big into wine, cigars, clothing, travel, antiques and fancy cars. None of the other guys around here would be caught dead out shopping, especially for clothes.
I must say, I haven’t been overly impressed by the wardrobes of the Stars (pun intended). They always seem to be ill-fitted.
I want ABBA karoke party! My Bunco group is going to see Mamma Mia together at one of those Studio Movie Grills. They are a pretty fun bunch, I can’t wait to see a dozen middle-aged moms danicing in the isles.
Hee. Glarkware was having a summer sale and I picked up the In Soviet Russia Shirt Wears You and the Swedish Mafia t-shirt for 35 bucks including shipping. WOO!
I remember reading awhile ago that a lot of players were into soap operas, since it was something to kill the time.
Oh, you’re just saying that to make yourself feel better about your own soap addictions! :P (I’m kidding! I’ve read the same about them.)
alix, I just might have to order the “Whomever for Whatever” shirt, now that its on sale.
Oh, you’re just saying that to make yourself feel better about your own soap addictions! :P (I’m kidding! I’ve read the same about them.)
Damn skippy. I figure if its good enough for NHL players, its good enough for me.
alix, it sounds like you made out like a bandit with those awesome purchases! :D
Damn skippy. I figure if its good enough for NHL players, its good enough for me.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I really did, Schnookie!
Hee. I love that one. Amy.
Totally different tack:
I noticed that Big City people did not bother writing to Mr. Miller.
Omaha, NE (pop. ~ 430 K) was the most, dare I say, [i]metropolitain[/i], source of correspondence to the aforementioned Agony Uncle.
The scientist in me begs, Why??
‘Tis a mystery, kdarc, ’tis a mystery! Maybe Crunchy throws out letters by people from cities he deems “too hoity-toity”?