Attention, IPB Irregulars! We’ve mentioned here that it’s time to start thinking fantasy hockey! Now’s the time to get serious (not that we’re never not serious about the business of fantasy hockey — HA!) so here’s the dealio. If you are interested in joining the IPB Superleague (or Amazingleague) please do the following:
1. Email andrew, the fearless commish, at a_d_mattson [@] yahoo [dot] com. Right now there is no set-deadline, but we’ll probably be looking to get the ball rolling on the draft in early September.
2. Tell him which is your favorite team. Remember, this is a cross-conference league. If you’re a fan of an EC team, your fantasy team must be entirely comprised of WC players. There are no exceptions to this rule. There will be no whining until you can get your favorite player on your team. Heather. And no “oops, I picked up the wrong guy” mid-way through the season. Sherry. Heh.
3. Watch this space for more information regarding the Auto-Draft. Andrew will make sure you get an invitation from Yahoo! to join the appropriate league (depending on the number of people signed up, we may need to split into two leagues). We will determine a date for the Auto-Draft that works for as many people as possible (i.e. when Patty’s on vacation). You will then be responsible for removing all players from the opposite conference. You may rank the remaining players as you see fit. Then Yahoo will do the rest! All that you’ll need to do then is sit back and watch as the PanBoxers and Tintin Tattoos kick some butt.
Remember, if you’ve expressed interest in joining in the comments but haven’t emailed andrew, you will need to drop him a line. He needs your email address to make sure you get registered. If you have any questions, let us know!
And also, you only get to trashtalk if you won your respective league last year. heh heh heh.
Nice try. Remember, we don’t send out that shipment of hookers and blow until the league is up and running.
Oh, Andrew, look at you thinking that you get to make the rules just because you’re the commissioner. Tut, tut. Has being a hockey fan taught you nothing about how the commissioner is just a stooge for greedy owners?
Remember, we don’t send out that shipment of hookers and blow until the league is up and running.
Hmm…I’m gonna need this years salary up front. Then I’m going to Mexico to lay low for a while.
Oh, Andrew, look at you thinking that you get to make the rules just because you’re the commissioner.
What can I say? I’m drunk with power. Hmm…I guess since this is the only power I wield, that would make me the world’s cheapest date.
There will be no whining until you can get your favorite player on your team. Heather.
Well, considering the player she was whining for was Tim Connolly, I’m guessing she’s pretty relieved that you guys didn’t get in now. It was bad enough that he was screwing with the Sabres, she didn’t need his glass skeleton affecting the Tally Hos, too.
That said, I still wish I could have picked up Yo-Yo last year. Harumph. He turned himself into a pretty fantasy-team palatable player, too!
The PanBoxers have an important announcement to make: there is going to be a name change for this season. Instead of Pandora’s Boxworthy, we are now Boxworthy’s Panopticon. Boxworthy is watching. He’s ready to pounce. So you best be on your toes! The BoxPanners are out for blood!
(Also, we’re hoping to reverse our results from last season.)
BoxPanners rule! Everyone else drools!
BoxPanners rule! Everyone else drools!
Whatever, after their stint at Faerie College, the Waffles drool excellence!
The PanBoxers have an important announcement to make: there is going to be a name change for this season.
Did Schnookie peer pressure you into changing your team name?!
Impressive, Pookie! BoxPanners is a great name! It’s totally the opposite.
Well, considering the player she was whining for was Tim Connolly, I’m guessing she’s pretty relieved that you guys didn’t get in now.
Timmy had better get his shit together this year. I swear.
Consider me (and Nat) signed up! Or rather, consider us emailed-Andrew-and-hoping-we-get-in, but that doesn’t seem quite so snappy.
Since we don’t have the benefit of fall-like weather here yet, the fantasy hockey talk is really starting to make me feel all pommerdoodly about pucky, too!
Um. I think andrew already knows my team bias, so I don’t have to email again, right? I’m sorry, my brain is so fried I can’t accurately follow any more directions.
I want cooler weather now….
I think andrew already knows my team bias
Avs, right? :P
I think andrew already knows my team bias
No problem! Got it written down right here, “Myra – Red Wings”
All set!
I’m so gonna be in over my head. I don’t even have a snappy name yet. Plus I don’t understand fantasy leagues. Which can only mean one thing.
I’m totally gonna win.
That’s right, make fun of the demented old lady….
I’m so gonna be in over my head. I don’t even have a snappy name yet. Plus I don’t understand fantasy leagues.
Don’t worry, Josh, answering stupid questions is how Andrew earns his hookers and blow! And he has lots of practice at it.
The demented old lady and her husband have no idea what they are doing either, Josh, so you may have some competition from the Petulant Little Ice Trolls. :P
And just in case anyone is crusing through, do not be mislead. I AM A DALLAS STARS FAN!!!! AND I WILL NEVER LET YOU FORGET IT, ANDREW!!!! And Patty, shame on you…Avs fan…Humph…
I AM A DALLAS STARS FAN!!!! AND I WILL NEVER LET YOU FORGET IT, ANDREW!!!!
Woo! Look out! Tough day at the office, Myra?! BTW, you may want to think up a few abbreviated team names, just in case. I think Yahoo limits team names to 20 letters or so.
And he has lots of practice at it.
LOTS of practice. And not at answering questions. Ifyouknowwhatimean. (Actually, I’m a terrible commissioner. It’s kind of a point of pride for me.)
Tough day at the office, Myra?! BTW, you may want to think up a few abbreviated team names, just in case. I think Yahoo limits team names to 20 letters or so.
Hee. Not too bad, I just had to throw something back at ya, is all. :P I’m really just planning on using Ice Trolls, officially, if possible. I just like saying Petulant Little Ice Trolls.
No PetLitIceTrls?
Iain, I’m so glad you and Nat are going to play!
Josh, I know nothing about fantasy hockey and I didn’t win last year. What gives? That’s all gonna change this year. As Patty said, BoxPanners is totally the opposite! PanBoxers might be losers, but BoxPanners are winners!
No PetLitIceTrls?
It just doesn’t have the same ring to it. :P
Myra, last year I wanted to be the Towakani Spiders, but I think I ran out of room. Or maybe it was just too obscure.
Josh and Myra, I LOVE Yahoo’s fantasy league because it is so easy to use. And it’s even easier now than it was the first time I tried it years ago. Lots of dragging and dropping.
Actually, that kind of describes the Raccoon Wives. They just dragged around and then dropped down the standings.
They just dragged around and then dropped down the standings.
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Actually, that kind of describes the Raccoon Wives. They just dragged around and then dropped down the standings
The Raccoon Wives! :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I think my favorite part will be the team names.
I think my favorite part will be the team names.
Certainly was one of the high points last year, Myra. We definitely have a creative bunch here.
And just for you (and anyone else who might not have been around last year), here’s all the teams from both leagues last year:
Superleague:
1. Statbitty Avengers
2. Rumble Frog Robots
3. The Invinnycibles
4. Mmmmm Kool-Aid!
5. Rabid Chinchillas
6. The Freudian Slips
7. 3-Way Lightbulbs
8. It Just… Team
9. Evil Orange Stripes
10. Fancy Bits
11. Sleek and Destroy
12. wdintrtkn
Amazingleague:
1. Slag Faced Horcoffs
2. BraveLittleToasters
3. Pink Piranhas
4. McCrotch’s Marauders
5. Mother Puckers
6. Pandora’s Boxworthy
7. Tally-Hos
8. The Raccoon Wives
9. The Waffles
10. Keyboe Soloists
11. Swedish Meatballs
12. Itty Bitty Sidbits
Boxworthy is watching. He’s ready to pounce.
Would Boxworthy do something as inelegant and undignified as pouncing?
The Little Honkers are tuning up their honks in preparation for the season. Their motto is “if you can’t beat them, HONK! at them.”
Good to hear I won’t be the only one who will be grasping blindly when it comes to fantasy hockey!
I clearly need to work on my team name ideas. I don’t think that “Unnamed Team” is gonna match up well with the Ice Trolls or Raccoon Wives.
I clearly need to work on my team name ideas. I don’t think that “Unnamed Team” is gonna match up well with the Ice Trolls or Raccoon Wives.
Yeah dude, you gotta bring the funny. Your competition will be fierce.
Man looking at all those team names reminds me of a million old IPB jokes, I guess all (most) have moved on to better places.
3-Way Lightbulbs? I don’t think I even want to know. Those are so fun. I can guess on several but not all. I think I love Itty Bitty Sidbits the best though.
Man looking at all those team names reminds me of a million old IPB jokes, I guess all (most) have moved on to better places.
I was thinking the same thing. I can’t wait for Hockey season!
Man, I’d forgotten a lot of those that were in the other league!
And Josh, I think “Unnamed Team” is actually kind of funny.
Oh, I don’t know if you’re still around, andrew, but the team change was due to the fact that a little birdie told me I was going to be kicked out if I didn’t change it! :P
Pookie, I kind of want to change my team’s name, too. I was looking at my old list of ideas and I might use one of those. I think “Intangible Intangibles” is too long, but if it’s not, I call it. :D
Intangible Intangibles! Love it!
HAHAHAHAHA! I love Intangible Intangibles!
There’s no I in Intangible Intangibles… there’s four!
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:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::, Pookie!
The Intangible Intangibles: We Don’t Know What the Hell They’re Doing
Your billboard campaign to advertise the Fightin’ Double I’s is awesome, Patty!
Thanks, Pookie! I wonder if the Stars will call for slogan ideas this year like they did last year. :D
And no “oops, I picked up the wrong guy” mid-way through the season. Sherry. Heh.
I must have really horrible memory because I do not remember this happening at all.