Things We Like:
1. The Whalers logo. We were recently digging through some old things and found the camera bag we used to lug to all the games we went to. We used to buy pins for every team whose arena we saw a hockey event at, and there, nestled into our modest collection, was the resplendent whale-tail W. Man, they just don’t design logos like that anymore. Or team colors, come to think of it.
2. Paulie being back off IR. We really like the Devils a lot more with our very own Sexy, Passionate Adorkable Gopher Warrior in the lineup.
3. That commercial that NHL Network plays in the wee hours of the morning where Rick DiPietro, Ryan “Crunchy” Miller, Jonathan Toewes, and the Staal Brothers (Marc doesn’t count ever since he tried to hurt Paulie) tell us to make sure we have digital cable by February of 2009.
Things We Hate:
1. That WordPress has taken the comment numbers out of the template design that we use here. This is seriously inconveniencing us, but we love how IPB looks too much to change templates to something that has numbers. Our lives are so hard.
2. The Rangers. In case you’d forgotten.
3. That Canon Rebel XSi’s are not waterproof.
Things That Just Aren’t That Hard:
1. Roasting a Thanksgiving turkey. Seriously. Buy a nice bird, don’t waste your time brining, rub it up with some herb-seasoned butter, and roast for 15 minutes per pound at 325 (F). Every Thanksgiving Schnookie gets all wound up that it’s such a production to make a turkey dinner, and every Thanksgiving she finds herself wondering, “What the hell is the big deal with all this?” It’s just not that hard.
2. Growing beans. Put a bean in the dirt. Water it. Watch it grow.
3. Outlawing headshots in the NHL. Would it really kill anyone just to make hits to the head illegal? Give guys penalties for hitting other guys in the head. Give more severe penalties if the hits are intentional. If it doesn’t work, tweak the rule until it does. Doesn’t it make more sense to at least try before deciding there’s no way the NHL can police this?
Things We Are Not Even Remotely Willing To Care About:
1. The Winter Classic in Chicago. Not the uniforms being worn, not the configuration of the seats, not anything. If there was any charm in turning a regular season game that counts for regular season points into a carnival, it’s retained only through making the event something special and unique. This year’s Winter Classic is not special and unique. They should call it the Winter Retread.
2. Voting on the All Star Starting Line-ups. Listen, if you want the fans to vote, don’t complain about who they vote for. If they want to see Turco start, fine. The other good goalies in the WC will get to play the second and third periods. It’s just not that hard. If you don’t want the fans to vote, then take the voting out. That might be harder since, when it suits their purposes, some people can get unreasonably uppity over what is not just essentially, but in fact quite literally, a popularity contest.
3. Mike Comrie and Hilary Duff.