The Show Us Your V: A Versus-Inspired Cocktail

February 4, 2009 by Schnookie

Thanks to flex scheduling, we were lucky fans who got to see their team get picked up for an extra crappy Versus feed yesterday. On top of that, we’re staring down the barrel of another Versus game this coming Monday. How is a girl supposed to survive that? Two Versus treatments for the Devils in less than a week? It’s terrible!

Well, spurred on by Myra’s suggestion, we decided the only way to confront this situation is with a cocktail. And in honor of Versus, it should be a girly cocktail called “Show Us Your V”, and the crappier it turned out, the better. After some deep thinking, though, mixologist Schnookie decided that it should also be a cocktail we’d be willing to drink, since the point was to make this dreadful week of hockey more bearable, so we scaled back our ambitions of craptitude. Instead we decided to aim for something kind of Sandra Lee Semi-Ho.

show-us-your-v-start

The components of the Show Us Your V are vanilla vodka, Sailor Jerry spiced rum, 7-Up, pomegranate juice, and limes. Girly? Check.

show-us-your-v3

Step 1. Fill a glass with ice. If you do this loudly enough, you can drown out the sound of Jones and Engblom during the intermission show.

show-us-your-v2

Step 2. Add 1 1/2 oz. Sailor Jerry and 1 oz. vanilla vodka to the glass. If you were not able to time the ice clanking to drown out the intermission show, pour with a very heavy hand — you’ve earned it by watching Versus.

show-us-your-v1

Step 3. Squeeze the juice of a whole lime into the glass, and pour in 1 oz. pomegranate juice as well. Don’t ever think we’re not health-conscious, as even our noxious cocktail has antioxidants and helps stave off scurvy. There’s way more nutritive value to the Show Us Your V than any of Versus’s programming choices!

show-us-your-v

Step 4. Top the glass off with 7-Up and stir. The Show Us Your V is ready to go before the intermission’s over, so you’ll be ready for the next period with glass in hand. It actually wasn’t nearly as sickly-sweet as we hoped it would be, what with the tart pomegranate and lime, but it’s certainly not a drink that’s going to put any hair on your chest. In other words, it goes great with MMA and bullriding. Cheers!

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Posted in NHL-Inspired Food & Drink | 193 Comments

193 Responses

on February 4, 2009 at 8:00 pm alix

This actually sounds quite delicious! Show us your V never gets unfunny.
on February 4, 2009 at 8:14 pm Schnookie

If you drink enough of these, or make them with “Sandy pours” (as Sandra Lee calls them), maybe Versus will get lucky and you actually will show them your V?
on February 4, 2009 at 8:27 pm alix

Just maybe :D
on February 4, 2009 at 8:42 pm Meg

I’m with Alix, those actually sound pretty tasty. Of course they also sound like they’re totally girly. And look rather feminine. And Show Us Your V is a kind of fantastic name for a cocktail.
on February 4, 2009 at 8:52 pm Schnookie

Ultimately it turned out that the drink’s only shortcoming is that it’s WILDLY girly. They’re quite delicious. And frankly, I’d be stunned if someone else hasn’t already named a drink “Show Us Your V”. I mean… surely we’re not the first ones to come up with that?

And as for hockey today, dude, the Pens are DREADFUL. What more do they have to do to get Therrien fired?
on February 4, 2009 at 8:54 pm Meg

What more do they have to do to get Therrien fired?

I’m sure they’re wondering that themselves.
on February 4, 2009 at 8:58 pm Schnookie

I’m sure they’re wondering that themselves.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Yeah, they’re all like, “I’m giving it all I’ve got!”
on February 4, 2009 at 9:09 pm Meg

The Leafs are also terrible. 38 minutes into the game they have 8 shots. The Sabres aren’t that good, dudes.
on February 4, 2009 at 9:10 pm mcguffers

Therrien’s got a picture of Crosby in a compromishing position with a goat. He’s not going anywhere.
on February 4, 2009 at 9:15 pm Schnookie

The Leafs are also terrible. 38 minutes into the game they have 8 shots. The Sabres aren’t that good, dudes.

Oooh, ouch. It’s games like that that make me wish shitty teams could make the playoffs. Just so the Devils can play them. :P

Therrien’s got a picture of Crosby in a compromishing position with a goat.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Sid’s like, “I was just trying to find out if every animal has a five-hole!”
on February 4, 2009 at 9:25 pm Meg

Tortorella is talking about how Toronto’s shitty game is “a great teaching tool for a coach.” I can only imagine how he would make use of such a teaching tool. I assume it would involve his head spinning around 360 degrees and smoke coming out of his ears.
on February 4, 2009 at 9:27 pm Schnookie

I assume it would involve his head spinning around 360 degrees and smoke coming out of his ears.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on February 4, 2009 at 9:27 pm mcguffers

Sid’s like, “I was just trying to find out if every animal has a five-hole!”

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

And along these lines of perversion, Rob Ray totally just said, “If two guys wanna do it, and they know how to do it, then let them do it while 18,000 watch and cheer.” Uh, that’s not what she said?
on February 4, 2009 at 9:31 pm Meg

Rob Ray totally just said, “If two guys wanna do it, and they know how to do it, then let them do it while 18,000 watch and cheer.”

And people say professional sports aren’t gay-friendly . . .
on February 4, 2009 at 9:59 pm Schnookie

And people say professional sports aren’t gay-friendly . . .

HAHAHAHAHA!

And poop! I go to make dinner and come back to find the BOLTS! coughed up a 3-0 lead. THE HELL?
on February 4, 2009 at 10:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Dumb BOLTS!…!
on February 4, 2009 at 10:07 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Hey, speaking of Versus, I just bought this vacuum cleaner!

See my V?
on February 4, 2009 at 10:10 pm Schnookie

What a sassy V, you sassy thing, Patty!
on February 4, 2009 at 10:14 pm Pookie

Patty, please! Children might read this blog!
on February 4, 2009 at 10:16 pm Patty (in Dallas)

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I apologize profusely!
on February 4, 2009 at 10:18 pm alix

HAHAHAHA!

The airport did block me from your lewd, lewd, blog the other day. :D
on February 4, 2009 at 10:19 pm Schnookie

The airport did block me from your lewd, lewd, blog the other day. :D

Well, thanks to Patty, now the airport’s going to have to block people EVEN MORE.
on February 4, 2009 at 10:25 pm mcguffers

Maybe Patty (in Dallas) should be changed to Patty (does Dallas).
on February 4, 2009 at 10:33 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Watch it! It’s just a vacuum cleaner! Y’all told me to show you my V! I didn’t make that up! :P

And mcguffers, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on February 4, 2009 at 10:40 pm Schnookie

Maybe Patty (in Dallas) should be changed to Patty (does Dallas).

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You know, I’ve met her. In person. I think that’s a TOTALLY apt name! :P
on February 4, 2009 at 10:45 pm alix

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Yeah, you should have SEEN her in Ottawa! :D
on February 4, 2009 at 10:49 pm Pookie

She was out vacuuming the draft boys’ carpets all night long.
on February 4, 2009 at 10:56 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Y’all said you’d never say anything about that!
on February 4, 2009 at 10:57 pm mcguffers

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: You guys are gonna need an 18 or older sign in from now on when anyone wants to see this blog!
on February 4, 2009 at 11:03 pm Schnookie

Well, way back in the day we plugged ourselves into one of those sites that gives your blog a movie rating, and we were PG. I’ve never been so ashamed in my life. I’m glad we’re creeping up toward at least PG-13.
on February 5, 2009 at 12:20 am kristin

Hey?!!? Where did everybody go?
on February 5, 2009 at 8:24 am Amy

That cocktail looks yummy. Though if Sandy were making it, not only would she be using “Sandy Pours,” she would be using bottled lime juice as well. And saving the actual lime itself for a choking hazard inside the glass.

I assume it would involve his head spinning around 360 degrees and smoke coming out of his ears.

I’m surprised Ron Wilson was doing this last night. The Leafs were just horrid against the Sabres.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:31 am Myra

Note to self: Do not let the Kid read this post.

Follow-up note to self: Consider not letting Hub read this post.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:55 am Schnookie

Good morning, everyone!

Amy, you’re so right. We completely failed in the Semi-Ho department by using fresh limes for fllllllavor and not just for garnish. *Smacks forehead* How could I be so dumb!

Myra, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on February 5, 2009 at 10:10 am Pookie

Amy and Myra, :^::::::::::::::::::::

To complete the Semi-Ho scene, we’d also have to double the recipe and pour the drinks into enormous glasses and then surround them with V related tablescape items.
on February 5, 2009 at 10:24 am Schnookie

A Show Us Your V tablescape would be HILARIOUS.
on February 5, 2009 at 10:32 am Amy

A Show Us Your V tablescape would be HILARIOUS.

And alternately terrifying.
on February 5, 2009 at 10:36 am Schnookie

And also totally NSFW.
on February 5, 2009 at 10:38 am Pookie

“This is my Show Us Your V tablescape! Look at these cute little place cards! I made them using just a few pieces of photocopy paper and a Xerox machine…”
on February 5, 2009 at 10:41 am Schnookie

Look at these cute little place cards! I made them using just a few pieces of photocopy paper and a Xerox machine…

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I just can’t wait to find the gynecological-themed remnant fabric for our tablecloth.
on February 5, 2009 at 11:04 am Pookie

I can’t believe “gynecological-themed remnant fabric” is a thread killer! Color me shocked!
on February 5, 2009 at 11:13 am Schnookie

I know. I was pretty surprised, too. :P
on February 5, 2009 at 11:17 am Morgan

Gynecological-themed? Oh! That V!
on February 5, 2009 at 11:19 am Schnookie

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on February 5, 2009 at 12:07 pm Amy

I just can’t wait to find the gynecological-themed remnant fabric for our tablecloth.

Remember to leave the edges unfinished for that rustic look.
on February 5, 2009 at 12:34 pm Schnookie

Remember to leave the edges unfinished for that rustic look.

HAHAHAHAHA! I might have neglected to use fake limes in my cocktail, but I’m confident I’d remember not to finish the edges of my tablecloth. I mean, if you were doing any hemming, it wouldn’t be semi-ho, would it?
on February 5, 2009 at 12:59 pm alix

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Only at IPB!

Awwww! Some snarky reporter callled Sundin as fast as a snuffleupagus, and he didn’t know what it meant. He had to ask his agent. That’s so sad! Poor Big Baldy!
on February 5, 2009 at 1:06 pm Meg

Some snarky reporter callled Sundin as fast as a snuffleupagus, and he didn’t know what it meant.

Poor Sundin, to be unfamiliar with Sesame Street is a terrible thing.
on February 5, 2009 at 1:13 pm Schnookie

to be unfamiliar with Sesame Street is a terrible thing.

I know! I feel more sorry for him not knowing Snuffy than I do for him being compared to him. :D
on February 5, 2009 at 1:32 pm Myra

A Show Us Your V tablescape would be HILARIOUS.

And alternately terrifying.

Yes, yes it is.

I agree too that it is very sad that Sundin didn’t know who Snuffy was. But imaginig his agent trying to explain it to him, that could be funny.
on February 5, 2009 at 1:36 pm Schnookie

But imaginig his agent trying to explain it to him, that could be funny.

HAHAHAHA! I’m trying to picture Mats’s face falling as the description progresses…
on February 5, 2009 at 2:00 pm Pookie

Mats [thinking]: When does he get to the part about the imaginary woolly mammoth thing being super fast?
on February 5, 2009 at 2:04 pm andrew

Poor Mats.

What’s the Swedish equivalent of Snuffleupagus? Oh right…I guess he is. Nevermind!

How’s everyone’s morning going?
on February 5, 2009 at 2:04 pm Schnookie

When does he get to the part about the imaginary woolly mammoth thing being super fast?

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Poor Mats!
on February 5, 2009 at 2:09 pm Myra

andrew,

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on February 5, 2009 at 2:24 pm Schnookie

What’s the Swedish equivalent of Snuffleupagus? Oh right…I guess he is. Nevermind!

AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He makes it so easy, though, doesn’t he?
on February 5, 2009 at 2:27 pm andrew

He makes it so easy, though, doesn’t he?

Not for Canucks fans, that’s for sure.

Sorry alix, I hate to laugh at your teams expense!
on February 5, 2009 at 2:35 pm Schnookie

I thought we were laughing with the Canucks, not at them. Wait, what’s that? They’re not laughing? Hm. Um… sorry, alix.

(Heh.)
on February 5, 2009 at 2:49 pm alix

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Poor giant sized button! It’s ok Mats. You looked very fast against Carolina. And you were 16 for 19 on faceoffs. And you weren’t in the box for the GWG. Progress, baby. Now you’re…the Swedish Chef or something!
on February 5, 2009 at 2:50 pm andrew

Borkborkbork!
on February 5, 2009 at 2:53 pm Schnookie

You looked very fast against Carolina.

Well that’s certainly not hard. Unless he wasn’t matching up against Brind’Amour… :P
on February 5, 2009 at 2:59 pm alix

Well he was skating with Ryan Kesler, and he kept up. Heh. Kesler is fast.
on February 5, 2009 at 3:21 pm andrew

Kesler is fast.

He is a speedy little guy isn’t he? Kinda reminds me of Torrey Mitchell.

Well, I’m excited. The Sharks are playing tonight for the first time in forever. They have a tough act to follow though, coming in on the heels of that asskicking in Toronto last night.

Did you guys hear, that was Vaneks 4th consceutive natural hat trick. Matched a record from the 1923-24 season. That’s insane.
on February 5, 2009 at 3:30 pm Schnookie

It has been ages since the Sharks last played, hasn’t it? Man, I hate when that happens. (Of course, I don’t hate it when it’s Versus games I’m waiting between. I can’t remember the last two Devils games I’ve dreaded as much as this past Caps one and the Rangers one on Monday. I’m being such a baby about it.)
on February 5, 2009 at 3:31 pm Schnookie

And that’s such a cool stat about Vanek!
on February 5, 2009 at 3:34 pm alix

I think Torrey Mitchell is a great comparison.

Kes is getting even better offensively lately. He’s a stud. And he’s only gettting 1.9. Love it. Everyone raves about freakin Mikko Koivu, but Kes does exactly the same thing at 2/3 the cap hit. Anyways…

The Canucks have a weird break right now to. They played Carolina on Tuesday and then play the Hawks on Saturday. I hope the Sharks put on a good show for you!
on February 5, 2009 at 3:42 pm Amy

that was Vaneks 4th consceutive natural hat trick. Matched a record from the 1923-24 season. That’s insane.

That they even keep a record of that kind of thing is insane.
on February 5, 2009 at 3:46 pm andrew

Of course, I don’t hate it when it’s Versus games I’m waiting between.

Me neither. Did you see on Puck Daddy the other day? NBC chose not to air the Sharks/Devils game this weekend in favor of the Rangers/Flyers. People were fighting and arguing over talented teams vs. ratings vs. whatever, and I think only one person mentioned the fact that not being on NBC was actually a good thing. I concur.

And that’s such a cool stat about Vanek!

I guess in the grand scheme of things it’s kind of irrelevant, but regardless, it is pretty cool.

I hope the Sharks put on a good show for you!

They should! It’s Columbus coming into town. They beat the Sharks in OT last time they were here, so it will be a good revenge game.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:00 pm Schnookie

Did you see on Puck Daddy the other day? NBC chose not to air the Sharks/Devils game this weekend in favor of the Rangers/Flyers. People were fighting and arguing over talented teams vs. ratings vs. whatever, and I think only one person mentioned the fact that not being on NBC was actually a good thing.

HAHA! The voice of reason is so often the quietest one over in those comment threads. As the hockey media is ever-so-slowly realizing the Devils are no longer the trappingest team in hockey, and we’re ever-so-slowly getting more exposure, I’m increasingly horrified that anyone ever whines about not getting enough national games. (And seriously, the Wings fans! Dude! What is WRONG with them??? Every time a non-Wings game is shown, they’re all, “But what about US????” And you’d think they’d know, of all people, what with about a quarter of all their games on the national feeds. Of course, if I had to contend with Mickey Redmond on my home feeds, I’d probably prefer Versus and NBC too…)
on February 5, 2009 at 4:00 pm Pookie

Yeah, I’m like, “Have at it, other fans. Be on NBC and Versus all you want.” I figure if after 3 Cups in 9 years the Devils don’t get off the hook for killing hockey, putting a game or two on a national broadcast won’t help, so fuck that “national recognition” crap.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:10 pm Amy

Continuing along the “non-recognition” lines, two of my co-workers that are my age just admitted that they have no idea what “Reading Rainbow” is. I’m trying to hide my shock, as I’m not involved in their conversation, but it’s happening two feet from me, so I have no choice but to listen.

And that’s my story.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:12 pm Schnookie

two of my co-workers that are my age just admitted that they have no idea what “Reading Rainbow” is.

HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!?? That’s terrible! Amy, I’m sure you don’t need me to say this, but your coworkers are cretins.

And thanks for sharing that story, because that’s officially the most shocking thing I’ve heard all day, narrowly edging out what I was just about to comment on here. And that thing is:

I AM SHOCKED AND APPALLED THAT SCOTT CLEMMENSEN IS APPARENTLY STARTING THE DEVILS’ NEXT GAME. I’m sure you can all hear my strangled choking noises in all your far-flung locales.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:13 pm Pookie

WHAT?! Don’t know “Reading Rainbow”?!? Good grief! How do they know that gila monsters meet you at the airport in Arizona if they haven’t seen “Reading Rainbow”?!?! I can’t imagine a life without getting “take a look, it’s in a book, reeeeading raaaainbow!” stuck in my head at least four times a year.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:14 pm Schnookie

I can’t imagine a life without getting “take a look, it’s in a book, reeeeading raaaainbow!” stuck in my head at least four times a year.

Me neither! I also can’t seem to imagine a Devils team with a starting goalie that doesn’t give up soft goals at least four times a game. :P
on February 5, 2009 at 4:17 pm Amy

I’m still shocked at the Reading Rainbow admission. I thought that show was a universal experience for us older millenials / young Gen-Y’ers. It’s right up there with Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers in my book!

I AM SHOCKED AND APPALLED THAT SCOTT CLEMMENSEN IS APPARENTLY STARTING THE DEVILS’ NEXT GAME. I’m sure you can all hear my strangled choking noises in all your far-flung locales.

But at least you only have a few more games of dealing with Clemmer before Marty returns triumphantly.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:19 pm alix

Hmmmm…maybe someone needs to knock out all of Clemmer’s $300 000 teeth. Surely Marty knows someone who knows someone. (Oh wait. I’m thinking of my superstar goalie. Italian stereotype for the win!)
on February 5, 2009 at 4:20 pm Schnookie

But at least you only have a few more games of dealing with Clemmer before Marty returns triumphantly.

Right. *Nods enthusiastically* Right! I’m gonna focus on the positive and pretend all those bad goals are just… um… Countdown To Marty points. Or something like that. (Marty better return triumphantly. If he doesn’t, I am going to give the Hockey Gods a serious piece of my mind. :P)
on February 5, 2009 at 4:21 pm Schnookie

(Oh wait. I’m thinking of my superstar goalie. Italian stereotype for the win!)

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Hey, Marty lives in North Jersey. He might not be Italian, but he probably knows someone who knows someone anyway. :P
on February 5, 2009 at 4:22 pm alix

Oh and surely by now it is clear that Clemmer has incriminating photos of Sutter showing his V to an underage midget hooker.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:22 pm andrew

I’m thinking of my superstar goalie. Italian stereotype for the win!

Speaking of….Luongo’s new haircut makes him look like one of the mafioso guys in Boondock Saints. You guys seen that movie? When Rocco goes into the deli and shoots the two thugs who are sitting at the table eating….the guy on the right, with the short curly hair. Looks just like him.

And speaking of that….the dude that played Rocco looks like Mike Ricci. Huh.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:25 pm Amy

Oh and surely by now it is clear that Clemmer has incriminating photos of Sutter showing his V to an underage midget hooker.

So that’s what the kids are calling it these days.

And Mike Milbury called Timmy a “self-centered little dink” on the air last night. It’s one thing when we do it, but when a dink like Milbury does it, the line is crossed.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:47 pm Meg

And Mike Milbury called Timmy a “self-centered little dink” on the air last night. It’s one thing when we do it, but when a dink like Milbury does it, the line is crossed.

Heh. What occasioned that one?
on February 5, 2009 at 4:50 pm andrew

Heh. What occasioned that one?

According to the video, it was Connolly’s goal from last night. Yeah…it’s dumb. Millbury needs to get back under his bridge.
on February 5, 2009 at 4:55 pm Meg

He’s just grasping at straws to justifying letting Timmy go back in that Peca trade (Pssst, Mike, go with the injuries).
on February 5, 2009 at 5:02 pm andrew

He’s just grasping at straws to justifying letting Timmy go back in that Peca trade

It could be a weekly series with that moron. Next week: Luongo, then Jokinen, Bertuzzi, Chara, Redden…..

Cripes, he really traded away an all-star team in the 90′s didn’t he? Gah…what a turd.
on February 5, 2009 at 5:05 pm andrew

Whoops, Sharks are playing Carolina tonight. Columbus is next up. Good thing I’m not a fact checker.
on February 5, 2009 at 5:07 pm Pookie

Pssst, Mike, go with the injuries

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Well, andrew, that’s the last time I ask you for a factual answer to anything!
on February 5, 2009 at 5:09 pm andrew

Well, andrew, that’s the last time I ask you for a factual answer to anything!

The last time?! I’m still waiting for the first time!
on February 5, 2009 at 5:28 pm Pookie

Don’t take it personally. IPB is pretty much a fact-free zone.
on February 5, 2009 at 6:18 pm Puck Huffers

I can’t wait to do this. Pens don’t get the love of versus until March and now I’m not sure if I should be pleased or upset.

Well, you know, I’m pleased.
But still.
on February 5, 2009 at 7:36 pm Schnookie

Bottoms up, Puck Huffers! :D (It’s actually a really tasty drink. We’re planning to have more very soon, and not just because of the Devils being on Versus again!)

And you guys, I worked AN HOUR LATE today. It was TERRIBLE. I thought I was going to DIE. They turn the heat off after 5:00! Who knew?
on February 5, 2009 at 7:37 pm Amy

Luongo, then Jokinen, Bertuzzi, Chara, Redden

I knew the Lui deal led to the Isles getting Pretty Ricky, but I had no idea he traded away Chara. No wonder he’s not a GM anymore.
on February 5, 2009 at 7:48 pm Schnookie

Yeah, with Milbury you can pretty much throw a rock into a group of all-star caliber players of a certain age and you’ll hit a guy he traded away for nothing. :D
on February 5, 2009 at 8:11 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Poor Jussi Jokinen! The BOLTS! waived him and sent him to the minors. I mean, sure, he’s no Vinny, but I didn’t think he was so bad that the Lightning couldn’t use him. So sad!
on February 5, 2009 at 8:12 pm alix

Hee. Dear Mike led to the Canucks getting a ton of our badass players over the years. Good times, good times.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:12 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Milbury really cut a swath, didn’t he?
on February 5, 2009 at 8:13 pm alix

Schnookie, that’s a HORRIFYING tale! I’m so sorry! An hour extra work is terrible.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:22 pm Schnookie

Milbury is a force of nature. :D

And thanks alix. It was so dreadful. I made a point of emailing my boss right before I left, just so he’d know I was there slaving away until AFTER 6:00.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:24 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I made a point of emailing my boss right before I left, just so he’d know I was there slaving away until AFTER 6:00.

I always do that when I have to stay late! :D

So sorry you were tortured like that today.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:26 pm Schnookie

Hey! I just saw a commercial for a drug my employer makes! The “these side effects have been reported” part at the end is especially gruesome — it’s like Colbert’s “Cheating Death” segment but worse. I’m suddenly not sure whether I want to ever take my employer up on the benefit of free drugs…
on February 5, 2009 at 8:27 pm Schnookie

My boss is married to a woman who voluntarily works 18-hour days. When I complained to him last time I stayed past 6:00 he literally laughed in my face. I… don’t think he’s going to be very impressed by my dedication tonight. :P
on February 5, 2009 at 8:32 pm Patty (in Dallas)

My boss is married to a woman who voluntarily works 18-hour days.

He doesn’t see anything wrong with that? Hmph.

My cousin used to do that, and she made really good money. But she finally told them she didn’t want to live like that any more so they gave her a staff and a big promotion and she only works 10-hour days and no weekends (except during the rush period before Christmas). She often kicks herself for not telling them that 5 years sooner.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:36 pm Schnookie

Yeah, every time he tells me about the hours his wife works, I’m like, “This is a good thing?” And this is why she’s a high-powered executive and I’m not. :D

So we’re in a state of emergency here at stately IPB Manor. THERE IS NO DESSERT! What should we do??? What should we do???????
on February 5, 2009 at 8:38 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I always keep chocolate chips in the pantry for just such an occasion, Schnookie!

A handful of them isn’t the best dessert, but it’s better than nothing.
on February 5, 2009 at 8:39 pm humminggiraffe

NO dessert!!!

Oh my gosh! How awful!

We had a Valentine’s day banquet at school today which normally would make me puke, but they had a freakin CHOCOLATE fountain. And truffles. And cake.

Do you gals have bread? You could make cinnamon/sugar toast. Or…cereal? With something on top? Hmmmmm….
on February 5, 2009 at 8:47 pm Pookie

It should be noted this isn’t just any no dessert travesty — this is a “I had my annual physical today and thus have a free pass on desserts for today” no dessert travesty!
on February 5, 2009 at 8:47 pm Schnookie

Thanks for the suggestions and support. We ended up going with brownies from a mix, but cinnamon-sugar toast and/or choco chips are great ideas.

alix, that is SO COOL that they had a chocolate fountain! I’ve seen them on TV, but never in person…
on February 5, 2009 at 8:47 pm Pookie

Oooh, a chocolate fountain sounds fun!
on February 5, 2009 at 8:48 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Chocolate fountains are GREAT!
on February 5, 2009 at 8:57 pm humminggiraffe

Oh yeah. It was magical.

OK, so I’m watching the Kings/Caps game. I kind of heart the Kings. But the Caps announcers are AWWWWFULLLL!!
on February 5, 2009 at 8:57 pm Schnookie

::Shudder:: Caps. Ugh. :P
on February 5, 2009 at 9:00 pm humminggiraffe

Well yeah, I hate the Caps! :D But the Kings are so adorable! Dustin Brown is such a cutie and then there’s little Anze the racoon and Drew Doughty. Plus NHL center ice online wouldn’t give me Bruins/Sens for some bizarre reason.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

alix, I saw the very end of a feature on the Kings feed about Doughty and Stoll and one other guy going out to eat and then bowling. Doughty is ADORABLE! They were giving him a hard time for drinking, like, ten Diet Cokes with his meal.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:04 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Dustin Brown really is pretty cool.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:06 pm Schnookie

Wait, Doughty drinks as much Diet Coke as I do? He and I have so much in common!
on February 5, 2009 at 9:07 pm humminggiraffe

Isn’t he totes adorable, Patty? I’m all about those 08′ draft defencemen! Drew Doughty and Luke Schenn. EEEEE. Must stop crushin on Luke Schenn…
on February 5, 2009 at 9:21 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I do the same thing at Chili’s! It’s easy to drink a gallon when your glass is constantly refilled for you.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:36 pm Karen

Mmm, dessert. I’ll be eating storebought cookies, but I did prepare cinnamon rolls to bake tomorrow morning, so I will make it through my hardship.

Some random blogger linked from Puck Daddy predicted that the Jackets will get into the playoffs over Vancouver and Minnesota. Therefore it is totally set in stone now! Despite the fact that we didn’t even manage to beat the Blues earlier this week. Oh well, I am still convinced that this is our year! Unless poor Mason continues to suffer from the consumption.
on February 5, 2009 at 9:39 pm alix

Karen, you can take Minnesota’s spot! They’re whiny and boring and they employ that mutant Boogard! But…Vancouver will not be denied. We have the Snuffleu…Swedish Chef!
on February 5, 2009 at 9:42 pm Pookie

Mmmmm cinnamon rolls…

Yes, I think you can mark the first round on your Blue Jackets calendar now based on that random blogger! :D
on February 5, 2009 at 9:54 pm Schnookie

Unless poor Mason continues to suffer from the consumption.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Poor consumptive Mason. Heh. (But yeah, you can totally write those playoff dates on your calendar in pen. If someone on the interwebs said it, it’s true.)

We have the Snuffleu…Swedish Chef!

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: You can’t beat that! :P
on February 5, 2009 at 9:59 pm Myra

Unless poor Mason continues to suffer from the consumption.

I hope he doesn’t continue to suffer. He is way to pretty to suffer. Poor little thing. I’m rooting for your guys, Karen!

We have the Snuffleu…Swedish Chef!

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

My little ice troll scored!!! He is on fire these days!
on February 5, 2009 at 10:20 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Boooooo!
on February 5, 2009 at 10:27 pm Myra

Patty is boooing the Avs scoring, not my ice troll. Just sayin.
on February 5, 2009 at 10:30 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Oh! Sorry! Myra’s right!
on February 5, 2009 at 10:36 pm Schnookie

SUUUUURE she is, Myra. You just tell yourself that. :P

(I’m kidding!)
on February 5, 2009 at 10:41 pm Myra

**pout face**
on February 5, 2009 at 11:04 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Poor little Conner got hit in the head with the puck and it couldn’t have been higher than the crossbar. :D
on February 5, 2009 at 11:11 pm Myra

Poor little munchkin. I don’t know what they are called but I think of them of them as their kidney protectors, anyway, Conner’s are almost to his armpits.
on February 6, 2009 at 9:32 am Grrrreg

Hi everyone!

I should be working instead of commenting here, but I’ve just read your conversation, and I have to say I’m rooting for the Blue Jackets these days. I hope they won’t prevent Vancouver from sneaking into the playoffs, but I’d like them to finally experience the best part of the season. (And by the way, the “random blog” in question is Battle of California. So they’re not so random after all, you can definitely trust them. And they also predicted the Stars to finish 5th. Just sayin’)

And the same goes for the panthers in the East. I am officially on the panthers bandwagon (I’m pretty much alone on that wagon, but I don’t care). Those poor florida fans have suffered for too long.
on February 6, 2009 at 9:54 am Schnookie

You know, Grrrreg, I’m also partial to the Panthers this year, too. Poor little buttons. I feel like they’ve been kicked around so much that I’m like, “You can DO IT!”
on February 6, 2009 at 9:55 am Meg

I’m down with the Panthers making the playoffs as long as they don’t do it at the expense of the Sabres.
on February 6, 2009 at 9:57 am Pookie

I’m pretty much alone on that wagon, but I don’t care

Hee! Maybe you’ll be a trendsetter!

Guess what? One of my colleagues called out today with — no joke — “the bends”. Um… I do not think that word means what you think it means.
on February 6, 2009 at 10:00 am Meg

One of my colleagues called out today with — no joke — “the bends”.

What, you mean he’s not secretly a technical diver in his spare time? I’m SHOCKED. :D

(My former neighbor actually is a technical diver. It’s insane as far as I’m concerned.)
on February 6, 2009 at 10:22 am Stalky

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAAJAJAJAJHAHAHA!
Avery back to the Ranger’s? A marraige of douchey and douchier!! HAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA! An original 6 franchise and the league’s most productive pustulating fistula.
I hope this gives Bettman the bends! Our maybe Whipler’s Hunch. Or dandy fever. Or Poor man’s gout. Or Hotdog fingers.
on February 6, 2009 at 10:28 am Patty (in Dallas)

Did y’all see Zednik’s goal over on Puck Daddy? I’m kind of partial to the Panthers, too.

And I also wouldn’t mind Columbus making it, as long as it’s not at the expense of the Stars.
on February 6, 2009 at 10:32 am Schnookie

I hope this gives Bettman the bends! Our maybe Whipler’s Hunch. Or dandy fever. Or Poor man’s gout. Or Hotdog fingers.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I don’t even know how to respond to that — I’m humbled by these afflictions, and only wish I’d thought of them first. :D
on February 6, 2009 at 10:44 am Schnookie

It’s always so awkward at the Bettman dinner table when Gary has to explain to his daughter where his Dandy Fever came from.
on February 6, 2009 at 10:45 am Pookie

I hope this gives Bettman the bends! Our maybe Whipler’s Hunch. Or dandy fever. Or Poor man’s gout. Or Hotdog fingers.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I’m getting the vapors just thinking of these ailments!
on February 6, 2009 at 10:49 am Stalky

I’ll need to defer to Abe Simpson and his Doc Washburn’s Guide to Maladies and Mustard Plasters as my reference guide for those crippling illnesses.

Zednik’s goal was slick. Billy Jaffe was beside himself on the isle’s broadcast last night. The rest of the night he highlighted the Zednik v. Martinek match-ups.

The Panther’s haven’t had this much positive hype since Mellanby killed that rat in the locker room with his skate.
on February 6, 2009 at 10:49 am Pookie

I really feel like it’s the NHL’s responsibility to making sure that I don’t have to teach ~~my children~~ Rollie the Cat about dandy fever before I’m ready to!
on February 6, 2009 at 10:57 am Schnookie

I’ll need to defer to Abe Simpson and his Doc Washburn’s Guide to Maladies and Mustard Plasters as my reference guide for those crippling illnesses.

HAHAHA! I should have known! Well, major finger to the nose. :D

I can’t believe how… likable the Panthers suddenly seem. I mean, for years they’ve been that bad, insufferably dull franchise we all just tried to ignore. And now all of a sudden it’s like, “Oooh! Sexy sleeper Florida!” Life is so full of strange twists and turns.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:07 am Amy

And I also wouldn’t mind Columbus making it, as long as it’s not at the expense of the Stars.

I wouldn’t mind seeing Columbus and the Stars make it. The Coyotes can be the odd team out. Hearing about their financial dealings throughout the playoffs would probably make me want to off myself.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:24 am Patty (in Dallas)

I hope this gives Bettman the bends! Our maybe Whipler’s Hunch. Or dandy fever. Or Poor man’s gout. Or Hotdog fingers.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I wouldn’t rule out Dropsy, either.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:39 am Amy

I hope this gives Bettman the bends! Our maybe Whipler’s Hunch. Or dandy fever. Or Poor man’s gout. Or Hotdog fingers.

I wouldn’t rule out Dropsy, either.

But even if he was suffering from these afflictions, all we we would be told is that they were inner, outer, upper or lower body injuries.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:42 am Schnookie

But even if he was suffering from these afflictions, all we we would be told is that they were inner, outer, upper or lower body injuries.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: (Pookie’s been dropping things lately, and Boomer suggested that she had dropsy. Dropsy cracks me up every time.)

The Coyotes can be the odd team out.

Aw! Poor Coyotes. How about we have the Ducks be the odd team out instead. Because one way or the other, we’re going to be hearing about the Coyotes financial situation until we want to off ourselves.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:46 am Patty (in Dallas)

I’m ALL for the Ducks being the odd team out!
on February 6, 2009 at 11:48 am Amy

Dropsy cracks me up every time.

Same here. And listing all these ailments makes me think that we’re one good case of dysentery away from an Oregon Trail game.

I’m about to go look for some Goose sized bubble wrap. The poor dear is out indefinitely(!) with an upper body injury. That’s like his third one this year.
on February 6, 2009 at 11:51 am Schnookie

And listing all these ailments makes me think that we’re one good case of dysentery away from an Oregon Trail game.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: TOTES! (Man, I love Oregon Trail…)

Wait, Goose is hurt AGAIN? What the hell? He didn’t hurt his hand again, did he?
on February 6, 2009 at 11:57 am Patty (in Dallas)

Pookie’s been dropping things lately, and Boomer suggested that she had dropsy.

My mom used to make that joke! (I still don’t know what dropsy really is. I was surprised as an adult that it wasn’t related to dropping things.)
on February 6, 2009 at 11:59 am Schnookie

I was surprised as an adult that it wasn’t related to dropping things.

I don’t want to be disillusioned. Just keep that kind of talk to yourself! :P
on February 6, 2009 at 12:06 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Like I say, I don’t know what it is, so it might be about dropping things. Maybe I mis-remembered about hearing that it wasn’t. :P
on February 6, 2009 at 12:21 pm Schnookie

I just looked up dropsy in wikipedia, and it didn’t clarify things one bit. :P
on February 6, 2009 at 12:26 pm Karen

I wouldn’t mind seeing Columbus and the Stars make it. The Coyotes can be the odd team out.

Aww, I’m glad everyone else is cheering for us to end our sad little drought!

Apparently the term dropsy has been dropped (sorry) in favor of edema. Which sounds way less fun.
on February 6, 2009 at 12:30 pm Stalky

Alright, maybe I’m killing the comments here (again) but here’s a dropsy definition from some archaic medical text:

The dropsy is a preternatural swelling of the whole body, or some part of it, occasioned by a collection of watery humour. It is distinguished by different names, according to the part affected, as the anasarca, or a collection of water under the skin; the ascites, or a collection of water in the belly; the hydrops pectoris, or dropsy of the breast; the hydrocephalus, or dropsy of the brain, &c. [Buchan1785].

Sounds lovely. Almost as exciting as French Pox or the Cuban Itch.
on February 6, 2009 at 12:36 pm Pookie

I knew my watery humour was off! That’s why I’ve been so dropsy!
on February 6, 2009 at 12:38 pm Schnookie

Apparently the term dropsy has been dropped (sorry) in favor of edema. Which sounds way less fun.

Yeah, when I got routed from “dropsy” to “edema” in wikipedia, I gave up. I like the archaic medical text’s description, though, because it at least as “watery humour” in it. I didn’t see that in wikipedia’s totally dry description. There was no water and no humour at all to be found. :P
on February 6, 2009 at 12:56 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I’m pretty sure my dropsy is of the brain.

I might need to check WebMD for Cuban Itch. :P
on February 6, 2009 at 12:57 pm Patty (in Dallas)

There was no water and no humour at all to be found. :P

:^:::::::::::::::::
on February 6, 2009 at 12:59 pm Myra

Hey all. I’m sad, I just read that they sent our little Swiss Miss backup goalie back down to the AHL and brought up some dude whose stats don’t look that promising either. Although he did just get a shutout. I liked Tobias Stephan and felt like he never really got a chance. :(
on February 6, 2009 at 1:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I don’t like seeing Tobias get sent down, either, but maybe he can get some confidence and some games and make himself look better to the coaches.

I’ll miss the occasional shot of him on the bench. I’m sure he’ll be back up eventually, though. Right? RIGHT??
on February 6, 2009 at 1:13 pm Myra

It probably is good for him to get some playing time and show everyone what he can really do.

**thumbs nose at coaches**

I hope he gets to come back, Patty. Sigh.
on February 6, 2009 at 1:18 pm Schnookie

That’s so sad that you guys can’t keep your backup goalie and we can’t make ours go away!
on February 6, 2009 at 1:21 pm Myra

I guess I should let it go, obviously the coaches know way more about the situation than I do. (Which is a hard admission for this know-it-all to make.) It just seemed like he never really got at chance and what little we did see didn’t look that bad. Whatever.
on February 6, 2009 at 1:31 pm Schnookie

(Which is a hard admission for this know-it-all to make.)

What are you talking about? The whole point of being a fan is second-guessing the decisions your team makes!
on February 6, 2009 at 1:41 pm Pookie

Rule #1 of IPB: Never admit that the coaches know better than you! :D
on February 6, 2009 at 1:44 pm alix

Columbus should totes make it as long as my Snuffleuphaguses do too! They can take Minnesota’s spot or the Ducks.

I love David Booth on the Panthers.

Oh and BoC is epically wrong! Categorically wrong! There’s no way the Canucks are missing the playoffs two years in a row. I will probably knife someone.
on February 6, 2009 at 1:45 pm alix

Yeah, I’ve already verified I could coach much better than AV. :D
on February 6, 2009 at 1:59 pm Schnookie

There’s no way the Canucks are missing the playoffs two years in a row. I will probably knife someone.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Well, let’s hope it doesn’t come to that! :P

I think AV’s proven that pretty much ANYBODY can coach better than he does.
on February 6, 2009 at 2:33 pm Amy

The whole point of being a fan is second-guessing the decisions your team makes!

And the difference between being a fan and a member of the media is that the media gets paid to second guess the team’s decisions.
on February 6, 2009 at 2:38 pm alix

Awww. That’s so cute you think I’m joking, Schnookie. :D
on February 6, 2009 at 3:09 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Myra, Heika said that the new goalie is 6-5, 220! He could set his coffee cup on Turco’s head!
on February 6, 2009 at 3:13 pm alix

You know what they say about big goalies…big pads.
on February 6, 2009 at 3:17 pm Mike in Idaho

What are you talking about? The whole point of being a fan is second-guessing the decisions your team makes!

And we can always count on coach Sutter to give us plenty of material, although unbelievably I hear via Fire and Ice that Weekes will get the start tonight. I hope he gets a shutout, not that that will get him any more starts I’m sure.
on February 6, 2009 at 3:26 pm Schnookie

You know what they say about big goalies…big pads.

alix, are you trying to get us blocked in even MORE airports? :P

Mike, I saw that about Weekes, too! Boomer actively wishes against Clemmensen shutouts (it’s pretty hilarious, especially considering how many he’s taken into third periods and lost this year, but as soon as the other team scores, she lets out a happy little sigh. The Hockey Gods are SO going to smite her :P), so I suspect she’ll be cheering very ardently tonight for Weekes to blank the Thrashers. :D
on February 6, 2009 at 3:29 pm alix

Sorry, Schnookie! :P

Hee! Michael Buble is calling the game on Saturday with Shorty on the radio. Maybe he’ll sign in the intermissions…
on February 6, 2009 at 3:32 pm alix

Or sing…that would make much more sense than sign.
on February 6, 2009 at 3:42 pm Schnookie

Maybe he could sign and sing!
on February 6, 2009 at 3:42 pm Myra

Myra, Heika said that the new goalie is 6-5, 220! He could set his coffee cup on Turco’s head!

Holy cow! This could be very interesting.

(I want to see him standing next to Chris Conner! Hee.)

I’m heading for home — see y’all in a few.
on February 6, 2009 at 3:43 pm Schnookie

See ya, Myra! Have a fun drive home! (I’m so jealous.)
on February 6, 2009 at 3:45 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Aren’t you leaving soon, Schnookie?!
on February 6, 2009 at 4:02 pm Schnookie

I’m leaving at 4:30. I chickened out about leaving at 4. That seems outlandishly early. :P
on February 6, 2009 at 4:12 pm Pookie

I’m so glad Weekes is starting tonight so I don’t have to go throw a pumpkin at Clemmer’s head.
on February 6, 2009 at 4:28 pm Mike in Idaho

I’m so glad Weekes is starting tonight so I don’t have to go throw a pumpkin at Clemmer’s head.

I found the loss against the Capitals easier to take last game once I could blame it on Clemmensen. After two periods, I was angry at the game in general but then the comeback started and Clemmensen let in his standard 1-2 bad goals a game to sabotage it but I didn’t feel near as angry once I could blame Clemmensen and of course Sutter by extension instead of the team in general.
on February 6, 2009 at 4:28 pm Mags

I’m so glad Weekes is starting tonight so I don’t have to go throw a pumpkin at Clemmer’s head.

I was reading a book recently that had a bit in it about scientists and pumpkins and transformations and it not working so well. We could call those scientists, have them transform a pumpkin into something heavy/sharp/big-head-deflating, chuck it at Clemmer, and then when the cops come around to figure out what happened to him, there’d be nothing but pumpkin bits. And you can’t really seriously hurt a guy (bruised egos aside) by chucking a small pumpkin at him, so we’d be off the hook!
on February 6, 2009 at 4:32 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I’m leaving at 4:30. I chickened out about leaving at 4.

That means you can leave at 4:30 one more time! You’re a genius!
on February 6, 2009 at 4:33 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Mags, that’s brilliant!
on February 6, 2009 at 4:58 pm Mags

Thank you, Patty :) I try.

We could give it a go with Avery too :D
on February 6, 2009 at 5:09 pm alix

EEEEEE!! My practice coverage was linked on the first page of the Canucks website!
on February 6, 2009 at 5:24 pm Patty (in Dallas)

alix, you’re a SUPERSTAR!!

And Mags? It’s a deal.
on February 6, 2009 at 6:06 pm KG

Interview with Zach:
http://www.nhl.com/ice/news.htm?id=407567
on February 6, 2009 at 7:43 pm Pookie

Ooh, KG, thanks for the tip! I’m totally puzzled by all these NHL guys having Hotmail accounts. Does the PA set them up with Hotmail or something? Aren’t they cool enough for Gmail?

Also, there’s an open thread for tonight’s game.
on March 30, 2009 at 7:56 pm Devils @ Rangers, 3/30/09 « Interchangeable Parts

[...] 9:53 We come back from a commercial to hear Doc informing us “both teams are a man short for another 40.” What? They’ve been four-on-four? We feel like we’ve never seen hockey before when we watch Blersus. We have no idea what’s going on. This might take another round of Show Us Your V’s. [...]