The Root Of All Of The Devils Problems, or: Build-A-Cake Workshop

There are a lot of questions surrounding the Devils these days, but none more pressing than “how is it that a team of professionals can be this confused about how to play hockey?” Gentle Reader, it won’t surprise you that we, being the intrepid reporters we are, have gotten to the bottom of this story [...]

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Devils @ Rangers, 3/30/09

Mmm. Devils/Rangers. Versus. It’s like a match made in heaven. Before this game starts, we just want to make something clear. There are some things in life that we really, really, really, just flat-out do not care about, and nothing will ever change that. Things like other people’s kids. The nutritional content of a plate [...]

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A Cure For The March Doldrums

March is a month of nastiness. It brings us weather that doesn’t warm up fast enough, late-season snowstorms when all we want are flowers, and worst of all, March hockey swoons. There is however one thing to look forward to every March — The Name of the Year bracket. It’s like the March Madness of [...]

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Devils vs. Hurricanes, 03/28/09

Join us in an open thread for another Saturday night of hockey!

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Devils @ Blackhawks, 3/27/09

This is exactly what happened at stately IPB Manor at the conclusion of the last Devils game: Pookie: [At the final buzzer, with disgust] “That was awful! Let’s change the channel right now.” Schnookie: [Clutching her head in sudden pain] “Oh my god, I’ve just this minute come down with the most excruciating sore throat [...]

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RESPIETO

After reading this story about Alex Ovechkin’s latest effort to keep Don Cherry relevant, we have to think this is a new low. Seriously, does it get more pathetic than ripping off Yaya’s “RESPIETO” t-shirt act from ANTM Cycle 3? That’s just weak. Someone please just steal Ovie’s powerbars, lie about him to Tyra, and [...]

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A Dark Day For PandoNation

Scott Clemmensen won the Devils Unsung Hero award? Scott Clemmensen????? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! To whomever on the team awarded him this, we don’t believe “Unsung” means what you think it means. Clemmer could not possibly have been more sung this year. People were talking about him keeping the starting job after Marty came back. There were idiot [...]

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