Pens/Canes G1 Open Thread

May 18, 2009 by Pookie

Oh no, our East Coast bias is showing! Wings/Hawks got nothing but drunken babble, but Pens/Canes gets its own open thread. Because that’s how we roll here in the Eastern Time Zone.

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Posted in Carolina Hurricanes, Conference Finals, Open Thread, Pittsburgh Penguins, Playoffs | 271 Comments

271 Responses

on May 18, 2009 at 7:48 pm Patty (in Dallas)

You call this a thread?!
on May 18, 2009 at 7:49 pm Pookie

Well, let’s see… What would be a good conversation starter… Hey, did you know the Staals are brothers?
on May 18, 2009 at 7:49 pm Schnookie

Yeah, yeah. It’s always a bit of a leap of faith to call a post an open thread — you never know if anyone’s going to show up. And there’s nothing more pathetic than an open thread with only comments in it from yourself. :P
on May 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm Schnookie

Hey, did you know the Staals are brothers?

If I were actually writing serious content about this series, I’d make a point of saying “(no relation)” every time I mentioned the two of them.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:51 pm Pookie

And there’s nothing more pathetic than an open thread with only comments in it from yourself.

No, no, there is something more pathetic — and open thread with only comments from yourself in which the content is entirely just play-by-play.

Hall dumps it in.

Holding call.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:51 pm mcguffers

From what I’ve read, there are quite a few East Coast teams who like drunken babble. Especially if it includes the phrases, “I was in Maxim once” and “Can my friend come?”
on May 18, 2009 at 7:52 pm alix

I’m contemplating playing the Staal bros drinking game. But I think I might end up comatose…
on May 18, 2009 at 7:53 pm Schnookie

From what I’ve read, there are quite a few East Coast teams who like drunken babble. Especially if it includes the phrases, “I was in Maxim once” and “Can my friend come?”

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 7:55 pm Schnookie

I would love it if they put a shock collar on Razor that made it very painful every time he said the word “larcenous”. Among others.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:55 pm alix

“Can my friend come?”

Oh there’s a Western team I can name that loves to ask this one too.

LOLS.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:55 pm Amy

“I was in Maxim once” and “Can my friend come?”

That’s straight out of the “How to Pick Up a Hockey Player” handbook. Chapter 6, Paragraph 3, Line 2.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:55 pm Patty (in Dallas)

No, no, there is something more pathetic — and open thread with only comments from yourself in which the content is entirely just play-by-play.

Hall dumps it in.

Holding call.

HAHAHA!
on May 18, 2009 at 7:56 pm mcguffers

I’m contemplating playing the Staal bros drinking game. But I think I might end up comatose…

I was thinking the same thing. I might just do 20 sit-ups whenever the Staals are mentioned. I’ll end up with 6 pack abs instead of going through a six pack.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:56 pm alix

Wow. I’m really glad we don’t have Razor. (sorry Stars fans)

WOAAAHHH!! That was pretty.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:56 pm Pookie

That’s straight out of the “How to Pick Up a Hockey Player” handbook. Chapter 6, Paragraph 3, Line 2.

I tried to read that, but as soon as I opened the cover it read “You are too fat for this book. This book will now self-destruct, fatty.” I think it was the special Crunchy Edition.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:57 pm mcguffers

Amy, you totally used that on Timmy, didn’t you?
on May 18, 2009 at 7:59 pm Schnookie

So now that they’re not playing the Caps, Geno’s allowed to score? Heh.
on May 18, 2009 at 7:59 pm carolbrowne

Pens are kicking All Kinds of Ass!
on May 18, 2009 at 7:59 pm mcguffers

Eh, the goal was nice, but did you see that assist?? Magical. Right, Patty?
on May 18, 2009 at 7:59 pm alix

mcguffers, that’s a good plan! You’ll be an icegirl in no time!

Well. my mum is making mojojitos. I guess that solves my deiimma about the drinking game. HAHA.

MALKIN!!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:01 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Pens are kicking All Kinds of Ass!

I always wondered what AKA stood for! :P

I want the Pens to to win, but not by a landslide!

And WOOOOOOOOO! Bouche got an assist!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:01 pm Schnookie

Hmph. No one’s making mojitos for me. :( (I say, chugging the beer Boomer picked up today at our local brewery.)
on May 18, 2009 at 8:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

This book will now self-destruct, fatty.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I love Razor, but I’m TOTALLY with you on the “larcenous.” He definitely needs new material. He’s been very lax-adaisical in that area.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:03 pm alix

By the way what the fuck is a mojojito? I spell good. Lol. It must be what Malkin drinks.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:03 pm Amy

You are too fat for this book. This book will now self-destruct, fatty.” I think it was the special Crunchy Edition.

So that’s what he’s been writing instead of his blog. Bad Crunchy!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm Schnookie

Just for that, alix, I’m totally making mojojitos this weekend. I don’t know yet what goes in it, but I’ll think of something.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm mcguffers

I tried to read that, but as soon as I opened the cover it read “You are too fat for this book. This book will now self-destruct, fatty.” I think it was the special Crunchy Edition.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I opened the book to the Table of Contents and saw the chapter titled “34B and a Personality Will Get You No Where”
on May 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm Myra

Ok, let me get this straight.

You like Jack Edwards but you don’t like Razor?

I find this very disturbing.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:05 pm Schnookie

I opened the book to the Table of Contents and saw the chapter titled “34B and a Personality Will Get You No Where”

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 8:06 pm mcguffers

A basic muddled mojito requires you to take about an ounce of simple syrup and muddle 8 mint leaves in it. Then add ice, rum and a touch of soda water. Shake and serve.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:07 pm Patty (in Dallas)

It’s a mojito with extra mojo.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:07 pm Schnookie

Someone needs to tell Mario how dreadful that playoff beard looks. When you’re sitting in the owner’s box drinking expensive wine, you don’t look cool anymore growing a playoff beard, no matter how much of a first-ballot HOFer you were as a player. No mojojito for him.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:08 pm Schnookie

A basic muddled mojito requires you to take about an ounce of simple syrup and muddle 8 mint leaves in it. Then add ice, rum and a touch of soda water. Shake and serve.

I knew that! I just don’t know what to add to make it a mojojito. Probably a shot of Red Bull. *Shudder* :P
on May 18, 2009 at 8:08 pm alix

Letang can have a mojojito for his pretty, pretty hair.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:10 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Wow. That’s some savin’ right there.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:10 pm alix

Schnookie, you add liquid pot brownies to it! LOLS.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:13 pm mcguffers

Sorry, Schnookie! I didn’t notice the extra “jo” without the contacts. Um, how about adding meth?
on May 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Razor said firing your coach mid-season is the new blockbuster trade. I like that point.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Amy

you add liquid pot brownies to it!

Mmm liquid brownies with alcohol and mint.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Schnookie

I didn’t notice the extra “jo” without the contacts. Um, how about adding meth?

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Hey, it’s never a bad time to post a mojito recipe!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:15 pm Pookie

You like Jack Edwards but you don’t like Razor?

When I was in college, I was assigned to design a worship space for a new religion. I was supposed to create drawings of the space, but I was bored and prefer model-making to drawing, so I created a whole scale model of the whole thing. I spent hours cutting and gluing hundreds of teensy tiny balsa wood steps into elaborate staircases. I made sure the model was designed so that it could deconstruct so the teacher could see all the important parts. I designed it especially so that it would be dramatically lit. It was a thing of beauty and it blew everyone else’s half-assed drawings out of the water.

I did my presentation and it was met with almost deafening silence from the instructor. Finally he said, “It’s very good, but next time, you need to make a person for the model to give it scale. Next presentation!” He then raved about everyone else’s stuff.

After class I ended up staying around to talk to him about something else and somehow the topic of my model came up. He said, “It was spectacular and you did really great work. But you have to know that I have much higher expectations for you than your classmates who don’t get the material as well as you.” And that was that.

And that’s how I feel about Razor. I have much higher expectations for him. I remember him from his Whaler days. I know that he knows hockey better than any other play-by-play guy now that JD is in management. I know he’s more creative and more engaging than anyone else. He’s better than the flashy stuff he’s trying to make his signature move! He needs to quick making models that don’t have people to scale them! :D
on May 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm Schnookie

Aren’t you sorry you asked about Razor, mcguffers? :P
on May 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm carolbrowne

you add liquid pot brownies to it!

Someone’s from BC, right alix?

AKA = all kinds of ass from now on. W00T! Thanks, Patty (in Dallas)!

I’m making a lemon loaf – now called the Evgeni Malkin Lemon Loaf, actually. Because Malkin Kicks AKA.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:19 pm Schnookie

Carol, I love how quickly you adopt our jargon into everyday usage!

Someone’s from BC, right alix?

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 8:21 pm Pookie

Aren’t you sorry you asked about Razor,

I just wanted to make it VERY clear that Jack Edwards and Razor are graded on very different scales! Jack Edwards is on the Crazy Man Scale.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:22 pm mcguffers

Aren’t you sorry you asked about Razor, mcguffers? :P

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::: I honestly had to go back and check, but for once this wasn’t my fault. *pushes Myra forward*
on May 18, 2009 at 8:22 pm alix

Someone’s from BC, right alix?

You better believe it! My family’s part time gardener supplies almost my whole family with pot. HAHAHA. Did I type that out loud? *whistles*

And you’re right. Geno’s middle name is AKA.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:22 pm Myra

Ok, that explains Razor, but how do you explain Jack Edwards? :P

(Sorry, I just couldn’t resist.)
on May 18, 2009 at 8:23 pm Schnookie

I honestly had to go back and check, but for once this wasn’t my fault. *pushes Myra forward*

Wait, that was Myra? I need another mojojito. :P
on May 18, 2009 at 8:24 pm Pookie

how do you explain Jack Edwards?

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds. After listening to Doc for 82 games, you need a little “Montreal blood red”. Heh.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:24 pm alix

The Razorism that drives me batty is mastadonic. Like what does that EVEN MEAN? Or am I just blonde and too high on the reefer?
on May 18, 2009 at 8:28 pm mcguffers

Wait, that was Myra? I need another mojojito. :P

I apparently need to lay off the mojojitos because I literally paused and agreed, then went, “Wait, I didn’t bring up Jack Edwards…”

It must be my Boston-hate that made it sound like me.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:31 pm mcguffers

The Razorism that drives me batty is mastadonic. Like what does that EVEN MEAN? Or am I just blonde and too high on the reefer?

I think mastachronic would be a funnier word.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:32 pm Pookie

The Razorism that drives me batty is mastadonic.

That’s what I said! Schnookie suggested that he stop using “larcenous” and I said “mastadonic”. I think he should replace those words with the words Grandpa Simpson didn’t want to hear on TV anymore. Instead of “larcenous” we’d hear “family jewels” and instead of “mastadonic” we’d hear “bra”.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:32 pm Schnookie

The Razorism that drives me batty is mastadonic. Like what does that EVEN MEAN?

“Mastadonic” was offered up as the second shock-collar option for Razor when I floated the notion here at stately IPB Manor. What I love about “mastadonic” is that the first time we heard him say it was during a Devils game, and while context made it clear that he meant it as a “look at me!! Look at me!!” synonym for “HUGE”, Pookie still cracked, “Hey Marty, he’s calling you fat.” (It always makes me think “old and slow”. Like Giguere.)
on May 18, 2009 at 8:33 pm Myra

I hate Boston just as much as you, mcguffers. I just haven’t had time to express it here lately.

Sorry to confuse everybody. And hello everyone. I’m back from my business trip and don’t have a major project hanging over me for the first time in a while.

So hello Playoffs!!!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:33 pm alix

I think he should replace those words with the words Grandpa Simpson didn’t want to hear on TV anymore. Instead of “larcenous” we’d hear “family jewels” and instead of “mastadonic” we’d hear “bra”.

HAHAHAHA!! I love it!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:34 pm Pookie

(It always makes me think “old and slow”. Like Giguere.)

Big, slow mastadons have big, slow five-holes.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:35 pm alix

“Hey Marty, he’s calling you fat.” (It always makes me think “old and slow”. Like Giguere.)

*Giggle giggle*
on May 18, 2009 at 8:35 pm Schnookie

And hello everyone. I’m back from my business trip and don’t have a major project hanging over me for the first time in a while.

Welcome back! Congrats on finishing your big project! And honestly, you look SO MUCH like mcguffers now! :P
on May 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm Schnookie

Big, slow mastadons have big, slow five-holes.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm Myra

Woah. So sorry about that, mcguffers.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm mcguffers

I hate Boston just as much as you, mcguffers. I just haven’t had time to express it here lately.

Sweet!! The Playoffs and I both welcome you back with a big hug :)
on May 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm alix

I think mastachronic would be a funnier word.

Mcguffers I LOVE IT!!! Next time I have the munchies I’ll say “Man those frosted flakes were mastachronic!”

Or. Wow, Matty. That naked cab party was mastachronic!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:38 pm Amy

Big, slow mastodons have big, slow five-holes.

That’s what she said.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:39 pm Myra

Thanks! I really appreciate you carry on the mantle of Boston hate, in my absence!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:39 pm alix

Oh by the way Ookies, here’s a little present for you that made me giggle.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2360/3540052345_744514ced4_o.jpg
on May 18, 2009 at 8:39 pm mcguffers

Woah. So sorry about that, mcguffers.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I’m sitting here unshowered in my gym clothes thinking I can’t imagine anyone wanting to be my twin right now.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:40 pm Schnookie

*Kittensaurus roar!*

Boomer just said after that save, “Charge up the electric collar!”
on May 18, 2009 at 8:41 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I think we could drink ourselves under the table in no time if we had the “ph-nom-nal” drinking game.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:41 pm Schnookie

alix, :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 8:42 pm Pookie

alix, that picture is too funny!
on May 18, 2009 at 8:45 pm mcguffers

Next time I have the munchies I’ll say “Man those frosted flakes were mastachronic!”

That was actually going to be the tagline said by Michael Phelps in his ads until Kellog’s fired him.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:46 pm alix

HAHAHA!! Kennedy got poked in his twig and berries!

Yes. I’m 12.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:48 pm mcguffers

I really appreciate you carry on the mantle of Boston hate, in my absence!

It was a challenge, let me tell ya. There’s a lot of Looch love here. (and why does he look like he’s enjoying that nipple twist?)

Unfortunately, I’m now left with four teams I neither like nor hate.
on May 18, 2009 at 8:58 pm Schnookie

Mmmmm… Looch.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:01 pm Schnookie

You guys, I was on SUCH a tear this past weekend with Squaresville, and if I keep up that pace, I’ll finish it this weekend. Alas, though, I’m not keeping up that pace. I suck.

And that’s my story.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:03 pm Amy

I want to point out to our esteemed Versus commentators that for every good ex-goalie GM out there, you have a Garth Snow.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:07 pm mcguffers

I want to point out to our esteemed Versus commentators that for every good ex-goalie GM out there, you have a Garth Snow.

I think even Garth Snow agrees with you.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:07 pm Schnookie

I want to point out to our esteemed Versus commentators that for every good ex-goalie GM out there, you have a Garth Snow.

Amy, you and Boomer are on the same wavelength!
on May 18, 2009 at 9:11 pm mcguffers

75999 seconds left of the playoffs. How do they account for overtime(s)?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:11 pm Pookie

I think even Garth Snow agrees with you.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::

Garth Snow: I’m a living joke.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:13 pm Myra

Chad LaRose has really big eyes.

Just felt the need to share that.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:21 pm Schnookie

Myra, you and Boomer are also on the same wavelength. :P
on May 18, 2009 at 9:23 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I MUST HAVE ONE OF THOSE POWER HAMMERS!
on May 18, 2009 at 9:29 pm Myra

I think I am out of practice, because I’m bored.

Or it could be that I just don’t really care about either of these teams.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:34 pm mcguffers

Or it could be that I just don’t really care about either of these teams.

Yup. That one.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:35 pm Schnookie

Or it could be that I just don’t really care about either of these teams.

Yup. That one.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Yeah, no kidding. I mean, I know who I want to win this one, but I’m not going to be jumping off the roof if they don’t. Heh.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:37 pm Schnookie

Chris Simpson: “Have you ever wondered what Sidney Crosby and Shania Twain have in common?”

Me: “ARE THEY BOTH CANADIANS????”
on May 18, 2009 at 9:40 pm mcguffers

Chris Simpson: “Have you ever wondered what Sidney Crosby and Shania Twain have in common?”

Me: “ARE THEY BOTH CANADIANS????”

Same amount of facial hair?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:45 pm mcguffers

Actually, a friend of mine is a complete stoner, and I always tease her about being a total moron but able to make a bong out of anything. Whenever she picks up two random items, I ask if she’s going to make a bong out of those. So my first response to the Crosby/Twain question was, “You can make a bong out of them?” but I figured it’d be random.
on May 18, 2009 at 9:46 pm Schnookie

Did Patty just pass out?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:47 pm Patty (in Dallas)

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
on May 18, 2009 at 9:47 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Whoa. What happened? Where am I?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:48 pm Schnookie

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Do you need smelling salts?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:48 pm Myra

Patty! Patty! Anybody got any smelling salts?

WWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For the Lovely Mr. Boucher!!!!!!!!!!!!
on May 18, 2009 at 9:49 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Same amount of facial hair?

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 18, 2009 at 9:51 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Did you see him blow me a kiss from the bench?
on May 18, 2009 at 9:54 pm Schnookie

He totally did!
on May 18, 2009 at 9:58 pm Myra

Well, of course he did.

(Pssst, Patty may need a little more of those smelling salts.)
on May 18, 2009 at 10:00 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Now THAT is a goal view!
on May 18, 2009 at 10:01 pm Patty (in Dallas)

WOOOOOOOO!!

And bummer for Canes.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:04 pm Myra

WOOOOO!!! Boucher goalie head nuzzle. Woops, there goes Patty again.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:04 pm mcguffers

I can’t remember who I decided to root for this series, so WOOO Boucher!!

(Pssst, Patty may need a little more of those smelling salts.)

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Borrow Guerin’s.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:06 pm Pookie

I kinda wish that game had gone into OT.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:06 pm Myra

Guess who was the number one star of the game???

Anyone? Anyone?
on May 18, 2009 at 10:08 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Who??
on May 18, 2009 at 10:09 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Boucher goalie head nuzzle.

I bet he said just the right thing. In French. *ka-thump*
on May 18, 2009 at 10:09 pm Myra

The Lovely Mr. Boucher, of course!

Woops, there goes Patty again.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:11 pm mcguffers

I bet he said just the right thing. In French. *ka-thump*

I may be off on the translation, but I think he said “I wanted to score with Patty.” Or maybe it was “I wanted to score for Patty.” Either way, win/win.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:13 pm Myra

Dang, Fleury is a baby.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:13 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Remember that movie, The Mask? When he turned into a crazy guy when he put on the Mask? His teeth looked a lot like Fleury’s.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:14 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I think you might be right, mcguffers. I think whichever he actually said, he also meant the other.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:14 pm Myra

That was not an attractive camera angle for Fleury.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:20 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Fanarchy is STUPID. (Although I like their cup made out of a beer bottle and an ashtray sprayed silver.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:21 pm alix

FLEURY!! I don’t care about your teeth. Just come join the sammich with me and TANGERS!
on May 18, 2009 at 10:22 pm Patty (in Dallas)

*swoon*
on May 18, 2009 at 10:23 pm Patty (in Dallas)

They’re actually very nice teeth, alix! Just HUGE.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:23 pm mcguffers

Fanarchy is STUPID.

I like how the Sabres’ fan says, “I’d use it to get laid.” That’s a pretty accurate representation, because that’s what the Sabres would use it for. I have no doubt that Adam Mair would be the one to lose it in Thailand.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:23 pm alix

Dallas fans, Jamie Benn just scored 4 goals. And one assist. Talk about stud. Enjoy him next season.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:24 pm Myra

Wow! Lengthy Boucher interview. I don’t know how much more Patty can take.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:26 pm Meg

Damn, I missed a Boucher goal? I’m missing all the good stuff these playoffs and seeing all the crap.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:29 pm Myra

Yep, alix, they are pretty excited around here about Jamie Benn.

I’ll be taking off to go see him during Prospects Camp. I can’t wait!
on May 18, 2009 at 10:30 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Wow! 4 goals!? I should have been TiVo-ing that game!
on May 18, 2009 at 10:31 pm alix

Oh and Buffalo fans will probably enjoy Tyler Meyers as well. Purrrrrr.

SQUEE!! The baby Canucks have a 3-0 series lead. Hoooray.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:35 pm Meg

Oh and Buffalo fans will probably enjoy Tyler Meyers as well. Purrrrrr.

Hee! I’d say Buffalo fans are just a little excited, you know. Maybe a smidge. If a smidge were the size of, say, Alaska.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:38 pm alix

If a smidge were the size of, say, Alaska.

Hee! That’s like Canucks fans and Cody Hodgson. The smidge is the size of Crosby’s bank account.
on May 18, 2009 at 10:48 pm Patty (in Dallas)

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: to the smidges.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:46 am Icing

I was sent this link. The idea seemed funny but I’m not sure it delivered. But if this is a friend of an IPB’er I take that back ;) I just thought it might inspire some IPB brilliance.

http://freetheunicorns.wordpress.com/2009/05/12/what-i-imagined-life-would-have-been-like-growing-up-with-bob-cole-hockey-night-in-canada%E2%80%99s-play-by-play-announcer/
on May 19, 2009 at 9:12 am Schnookie

Good morning, everyone! How are we all doing in the aftermath of Bouche’s big night? (That would sound a lot worse if it had been a Sabre, which is one more reason we should be happy that Derek Roy didn’t make the playoffs this year. :P)

I walked to work this morning, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t ready to crawl back into bed now.

And that’s my story.

(And Icing, that link is hilarious!)
on May 19, 2009 at 9:35 am Pookie

I walked to work this morning, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t ready to crawl back into bed now.

Replace “walking” with “driving” and I agree.

Icing, that Bob Cole thing was too funny!
on May 19, 2009 at 9:41 am Amy

Good morning, everyone. I’m ready for a nap and it’s only 9:41 am. How am I going to make it until 5pm?

How are we all doing in the aftermath of Bouche’s big night?

Bouche’s Big Night sounds like a Dr. Seuss book gone horribly wrong.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:43 am Schnookie

I’m ready for a nap and it’s only 9:41 am. How am I going to make it until 5pm?

I’m wondering exactly the same thing. And much to my surprise, my boss isn’t in the office today. It’s quiet as the grave here. No one would even notice if I was asleep under my desk! :P

Bouche’s Big Night sounds like a Dr. Seuss book gone horribly wrong.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 19, 2009 at 9:50 am chowner

First of all, Go Pens!

Second, whoever is sending the link to my blog post around, thank you.

Finally, Icing, in hopes of making my work better, what didn’t deliver?
on May 19, 2009 at 9:52 am chowner

By the way, I’m the author of Free The Unicorns.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:54 am Schnookie

Hi chowner! That Bob Cole post was a work of genius! :D
on May 19, 2009 at 9:57 am Pam

Good morning All! How is everyone today?
on May 19, 2009 at 10:11 am Mags

Bouche’s Big Night sounds like a Dr. Seuss book gone horribly wrong.

Or horribly right. It depends on your point of view, I think.

How is everyone today?

Good morning Pam! I’m doing ok. Neither of my “WRITE YOUR PAPER”-ers (my parents) are home today, and they both have late meetings. I’m actually getting more done right now than when I was trying to explain everything to my mother. Hmmmm.

Icing, that link is wicked funny. Seriously excellent.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:12 am Schnookie

How close are your papers to being done, Mags? Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?
on May 19, 2009 at 10:15 am Pam

Well Mags, I hope for the best for your papers!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:19 am Pam

Oh, I forgot to mention, we get some kind of “reward” for renewing our season tickets early and paying full, so Val and I will get to go on a tour of the Devils locker room during practice next fall!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:22 am Schnookie

Whoa! That’s so cool, Pam! (Although I have to say, we were watching Travis’s NHL Live appearance online last night, and they had some clips from the first round, complete with shots of Langer looking all typically Langerish after the G7 loss, and I was like, “Ack! Too soon! Too soon! Turn it off!” Right now I’d be thinking, “A tour of the dressing room? Cool! But does it have to be the Devils’ room?” :P)
on May 19, 2009 at 10:29 am Pam

Schnookie, I think my wounds have somewhat healed!

They had a whole list of things to choose from. You were supposed to pick your top 10 reward choices, and that was our #1. Val was convinced they were going to give us the “guaranteed verizon fan rant” to be shown on the big screen at an intermission.

Also, for the first time in my life, I saw that “Langer” truck that you guys mentioned many moons ago. But it was headed north! That has to be a good sign for next year, right? Well okay, probably not.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:31 am Schnookie

Val was convinced they were going to give us the “guaranteed verizon fan rant” to be shown on the big screen at an intermission.

Wait, that’s a reward? That sounds AWFUL! (Of course, I am now imagining what my “fan rant” would sound like. Probably lots of, “GAH! This fucking team! GAH!”)

And the Langer truck is heading north? I’m totally taking that as a good sign!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:36 am KenF

Pam, what you’ll need to do is body paint yourself with wood-grain to match the stalls, then blend into the walls while the rest of the tour group continues.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:37 am Pam

The rewards were strangely incongruent. Like, one of them was to have a luxury suite for a game, and another is the Fan Rant. I wonder if anyone chose that. It wasn’t even on our list, but Val figured that since we are unlucky and we sit in cheap seats that they didn’t care what we wanted.

We already had it planned out: We both sit in the little booth thing with our middle fingers up and say something like “I paid for my tickets in full way before April 17th, and all they gave me was this fucking fan rant”.

As for the Langer truck, we were driving to our parents home in North Jersey, and we’re all “Oooh, that’s the truck the Ookies were talking about! Look, it’s heading north!”
on May 19, 2009 at 10:37 am Morgan

‘Canes lose game 1, so uh ‘Canes in 7?
on May 19, 2009 at 10:38 am Pam

Ken, maybe we’ll hide in the dirty laundry bin, wait for the tour to leave, and then wreak havoc in the locker room!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:40 am Schnookie

“I paid for my tickets in full way before April 17th, and all they gave me was this fucking fan rant”

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I love it! And yeah, being unlucky and in the cheap seats means your reward is generally something akin to a kick in the teeth. At our last fan appreciation day, Morgan kept hoping he’d win a grand piano, just so the people handing out the prizes would have to carry it all the way up to the last row. Let them feel some pain once for once. :P

KenF, that is SUCH a brilliant plan!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:43 am Mags

Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?

The draft is due on Monday. Beyond that, we’ll see.

‘Canes lose game 1, so uh ‘Canes in 7?

That’s pretty much what I thought this morning.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:47 am Pam

Sadly, I’m also thinking ‘Canes in 7.

Usually I’d expect a kick in the teeth, so getting our chosen reward was quite uplifting.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:49 am Pookie

Ooooh, a tour of the dressing room! Cool! I’d write in my own reward: “The opportunity to ask each of the players if they can swim. Since I already know that Weekes can’t, I’d like to ask Paulie twice. Thank you.”
on May 19, 2009 at 10:51 am Pam

Pookie, the “write-in” idea is pure brilliance!

My write-in: “Lou has to check with me before he signs and free agents or makes any trades.”
on May 19, 2009 at 10:57 am SueNJ97

I was watching the Pens-Canes last night and couldn’t decide who I wanted to win, because I didn’t like either one. There just wasn’t a rooting interest. What I really, really did want to happen was for the ‘Canes to come back, tie the game up in the final seconds and ‘bring shame’ on the Pens (like some other teams who shall remain nameless), but then I somehow wanted them both to lose.

I just don’t like this series. There, I said it.
on May 19, 2009 at 11:01 am Pam

Sue, I don’t like it either. What I was hoping for in Game 7 from ‘Canes-Bruins: ‘Canes are up by one late. Boston ties it with 1:20 left. Boston scores the game winner with 0.2 seconds left. It didn’t happen that way. Was that too much to ask for?
on May 19, 2009 at 11:03 am SueNJ97

Was that too much to ask for?

I don’t think it was, but obviously, I don’t control anything.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:11 pm mcguffers

Was that too much to ask for?

I wanted the Bruins to be tainted by the Russian Mob, cocaine, Celine Dion’s husband and hookers, causing them to be trainwrecks and get swept while losing whatever was left of their dignity. So I think you’re request was slightly more attainable.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:12 pm Amy

maybe we’ll hide in the dirty laundry bin, wait for the tour to leave, and then wreak havoc in the locker room!

Make sure you have a snorkel or something handy to help you breathe. Do you know what dirty hockey gear smells like?
on May 19, 2009 at 12:14 pm Schnookie

mcguffers, :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Oh, and if everything you listed there wasn’t enough indignity for Habs fans to suffer, you failed to note that by being bad enough for the Bruins to sweep them, the Habs inadvertently gave hockey fans their annual “No, no, I really do love hockey” insult column from Bill Simmons. Thanks, Habs. Thanks a lot.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:21 pm Pam

Amy, I’m fairly certain that if we actually jumped in a laundry bin with sweaty hockey gear we would perish!

Bill Simmons is such a douche.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:38 pm Pookie

Less a douche and more just not very smart about hockey. I was saying to Schnookie that it’s just embarrassing to listen to casual fans talk about hockey.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:42 pm Caitlin

Has Bill Simmons suffered a head injury recently.

He seriously didn’t write an article about how the game has not changed a bit and instead, we, as the great American collective, have changed twice, did he?

Argh.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:46 pm Schnookie

I love Bill Simmons, so I find it especially tragic (and also insulting to hockey fans) to watch him pathetically try to justify how he has spent the last ten years relentlessly slagging on the NHL but now that it’s dawned on him that the NBA’s product is boring (not to mention teetering on the brink of “lockout season” apocalypse), it turns out he really did like hockey all along. How embarrassing. Heh.
on May 19, 2009 at 12:52 pm Pam

I wonder if he knows about Walker’s wife.

Hockey column or not, I think Simmons is a giant homer, sexist, and douche.
on May 19, 2009 at 1:11 pm mcguffers

Oh, and if everything you listed there wasn’t enough indignity for Habs fans to suffer, you failed to note that by being bad enough for the Bruins to sweep them, the Habs inadvertently gave hockey fans their annual “No, no, I really do love hockey” insult column from Bill Simmons.

It was all part of their sadistic little plan. Bastards.

Oh, and among the Komisarek rumors… the Flyers! Wouldn’t that be a lot of blond hair and white teeth!
on May 19, 2009 at 1:15 pm Schnookie

Wouldn’t that be a lot of blond hair and white teeth!

My goodness! (How are they planning to afford him? Was his season really so bad that his price has plummeted that much?)
on May 19, 2009 at 1:18 pm mcguffers

Please! In the world of sports writers, salary caps are only hypothetical. They can find a way to get Bouwmeester and Komi.

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/169048-flyers-is-it-possible-to-acquire-both-bouwmeester-and-komisarek
on May 19, 2009 at 1:21 pm Schnookie

Okay, I don’t have to even read that. All I have to see is that the URL includes the phrase “flyers is it possible to acquire both bouwmeester and komisarek” and my mind immediately shouts, “NO!” Heh.
on May 19, 2009 at 1:22 pm mcguffers

Actually, I think the Flyers rumor that had validity was the Lupol or Briere + top prospect for Price and rights to Komisarek. But Briere has a no-trade clause they need to work around.
on May 19, 2009 at 1:23 pm Amy

How are they planning to afford him?

Not to mention the fact that they need to sign a goalie or two as well. Do the Flyers just have a printing press in the basement of the arena so they can go print cash whenever needed?
on May 19, 2009 at 1:24 pm mcguffers

HAHAHAHA Schnookie, that’s pretty much what EVERY comment says, too. Well, some of them contain the phrases “WTF is wrong with you?” and “You must be on some good shit! Please share.”
on May 19, 2009 at 1:25 pm mcguffers

Do the Flyers just have a printing press in the basement of the arena so they can go print cash whenever needed?

They’re already dressed like convicts…
on May 19, 2009 at 1:30 pm Schnookie

They’re already dressed like convicts…

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

It seems to me that Briere isn’t tradable for another year or two — I mean, doesn’t he at least have one more year where his cap hit is close to his actual salary? I thought the tradability of a contract like that came into play when his salary was way lower than his cap hit. Of course, the Habs are pretty stupid (almost as much as the Flyers), so who even knows what to expect from them. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 1:32 pm Pookie

All I have to see is that the URL includes the phrase “flyers is it possible to acquire both bouwmeester and komisarek”

All I have to see is that the URL includes “Bleacher Report”.
on May 19, 2009 at 1:35 pm Schnookie

All I have to see is that the URL includes “Bleacher Report”.

HAHAHAHAHA! So true.
on May 19, 2009 at 1:42 pm mcguffers

All I have to see is that the URL includes “Bleacher Report”.

I’ll stand by my previous assertion that if you find it online, it’s true.

But here’s the actual article:

http://www.courierpostonline.com/article/20090517/SPORTS04/905170376/1002/sports (second page)

And this is straight “from South Jersey to you”!
on May 19, 2009 at 1:49 pm Schnookie

Okay, as much as I want to encourage you to continue to believe everything you read on the interwebs, you should never, ever, ever trust ANYTHING coming from South Jersey.

(Just kidding. It’s certainly more trustworthy than North Jersey…)
on May 19, 2009 at 1:55 pm mcguffers

(Just kidding. It’s certainly more trustworthy than North Jersey…)

The Rochester Democrat and Chronicle could tell me the earth is round, and I still wouldn’t put money on it.
on May 19, 2009 at 2:11 pm Schnookie

The Rochester Democrat and Chronicle could tell me the earth is round, and I still wouldn’t put money on it.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 19, 2009 at 2:20 pm SueNJ97

you should never, ever, ever trust ANYTHING coming from South Jersey

You mean, the universe doesn’t rotate around South Jersey/Philly? Damn…all those decades of believing, shot to hell.
on May 19, 2009 at 2:23 pm Schnookie

Nope. The universe rotates around Central Jersey. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 2:27 pm SueNJ97

Do the Flyers just have a printing press in the basement of the arena so they can go print cash whenever needed?

LOL. I wonder what they Flyers, as an organization, really think of the cap. Because it has probably made them amazingly more profitable…but they still can’t get anywhere near the Cup and they still are cursed with sieves for goalies.

I remember right before the lockout Clarke and Snider gave interviews on the same day, Snider talking about how it was all necessary because how, even the Flyers were losing $$$ and Clarke, who never checked w/his owner, talking about how they didn’t need no stinking cap, they had plenty of revenue streams and tough for other teams because they could afford to spend what they were spending and more. But, Bobby, it didn’t get you a Cup.

So, I suspect they still have those revenue streams, even in this economy and they now aren’t allowed to spend. So, the printing press is not necessary. They are much more profitable than they used to be. But they still don’t win.
on May 19, 2009 at 2:49 pm SueNJ97

Travis’ NHL Live appearance is available on You Tube and BoNY has it. No cribbage, sorry. http://www.battleofny.com/2009/05/19/zajac-visits-all-access/
on May 19, 2009 at 3:29 pm Schnookie

WOO HOOOOOOOOOO! My first farm pick-up is this Friday!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Let the summer truly begin!!!

And that’s my story. :D
on May 19, 2009 at 3:31 pm Pookie

I saw that Travis video last night and he looked good. Clean, relaxed, happy. Losing early agrees with him. Just kidding!

I am SO excited for strawberries this weekend! WOOOOOOO!!!
on May 19, 2009 at 3:34 pm Schnookie

Clean, relaxed, happy. Losing early agrees with him.

Pookie remarked on this last night, and my response was, “Well, he’s on the right team then.”
on May 19, 2009 at 4:09 pm Amy

Losing early agrees with him.

Think about how relaxed he would be if he were a Sabre. He’d have an additional two weeks of vacation every summer.
on May 19, 2009 at 4:09 pm Schnookie

Don’t tempt Travis. It’s KILLING him that he missed out on two weeks of vacation.
on May 19, 2009 at 4:16 pm alix

Oh he’s such a foxy, foxy dullard. That voice. Purrrrr. Your move Paulie Pot Brownie Martin.
on May 19, 2009 at 4:18 pm Amy

Don’t tempt Travis.

Heh. Sabres fans (and Staffy) can be very persuasive.
on May 19, 2009 at 4:19 pm mcguffers

Think about how relaxed he would be if he were a Sabre. He’d have an additional two weeks of vacation every summer.

They usually take November off, too. And March. And February.
on May 19, 2009 at 7:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

They usually take November off, too. And March. And February.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on May 19, 2009 at 7:06 pm KG

Oh my god. Travis is soooooooooo adorable.
on May 19, 2009 at 7:24 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Mmmmm… Mr. Beefy.
on May 19, 2009 at 7:57 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Oh, man. I wish that one had gone in. It’d be fun if a random dump-in bounced over Osgood’s head and into the net. Then his confidence is completely shattered and they lose 4 in a row. Wouldn’t that be hilarious? Sigh.
on May 19, 2009 at 7:57 pm Schnookie

I feel like this series is going to be a short one. Heh.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:06 pm mcguffers

I had to think about who Chicago played last series, because I don’t think I was rooting for them. I think I will now. Just as long as Brian Campbell doesn’t score. *cue Soupy’s power play goal*
on May 19, 2009 at 8:08 pm Myra

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

I saw Mr. Beefy earlier when we were cooking dinner.

I can’t believe how many penalties the Wings have already had.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:12 pm mcguffers

Hmmm. I don’t think they should have let Holstrom stand there.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:19 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Woo and Boo.

Chicago needs to pretend it’s 0-0 so they can get the next goal.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:31 pm Schnookie

Does Versus really think anyone’s going to watch that Fanarchy show?
on May 19, 2009 at 8:39 pm mcguffers

Especially those of us who know how embarrassing and irrational our team’s fans can be.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:41 pm Myra

I’m frightened at the propect that there might really be some people out who would watch Fanarchy. REALLY SCARY.

CHICAGO! YOU CANNOT KEEP TAKING PENALTIES AND EXPECT TO BEAT DETROIT. DUH.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:43 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Poor dude. Got it in the jewels.

He’s got his hands down in his pants.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:44 pm Schnookie

I’m frightened at the propect that there might really be some people out who would watch Fanarchy. REALLY SCARY.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I’m actually very calm about it, because I am completely confident that there is NO ONE out there who would watch it. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 8:44 pm Pookie

Does anyone else have a hard time reading the word “fanarchy”? I’m like, “Farchy? Fana-chee? Faaaahahahahchy?” Also, those people are clearly actors.
on May 19, 2009 at 8:48 pm mcguffers

I’m like, “Farchy? Fana-chee? Faaaahahahahchy?”

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Also, those people are clearly actors.

I thought I recognized Elisha Cuthbert.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:03 pm Myra

What happened to Mr. Beefy!?!

Cleary. Boo.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:04 pm Patty (in Dallas)

This game is not going the way I want it to. How did that guy get away with tackling Mr. Beefy to the ice so blatantly? Oh, right. He’s a Red Wing.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:05 pm mcguffers

Oooh. It’s the Buffalo Bills 50th season. I hope they make a big deal out of it, because anniversary years always go so well.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:06 pm Amy

I’m frightened at the propect that there might really be some people out who would watch Fanarchy.

I’m glad they didn’t rip off the Sex Pistols “Anarchy in the UK” and have the theme song just be the line “I wanna be…fanarchy.”
on May 19, 2009 at 9:13 pm carolbrowne

Buffalo Bills 50th season

“It puts the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose again!”

Wait, you mean a different Buffalo Bill?

“Put the lotion in the fucking basket!!”

Hi guys!
on May 19, 2009 at 9:14 pm mcguffers

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: carol
on May 19, 2009 at 9:16 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Cleary: I don’t have the moves like Pavel… just the calf-wrestling move I showed earlier on Sharp.

(I might be paraphrasing.)
on May 19, 2009 at 9:18 pm Myra

Cleary was the one who hurt Sharp? Argh.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:21 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Cleary was the one who hurt Sharp? Argh.

Oh, I thought that’s what you said! You were probably talking about his goal by then. Oopsie!
on May 19, 2009 at 9:22 pm Schnookie

Carol, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

And mcguffers, 50th anniversaries are only half as bad as 100th ones. So the Bills should be fine. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 9:24 pm Myra

Ok, I just saw the commercial for the Craftsman Power Hammer.

I want one, too.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:26 pm alix

How did that guy get away with tackling Mr. Beefy to the ice so blatantly?

While I’m sad it wasn’t Byfuglidouche or Adam Burish or Ben Eager instead of Mr. Beefy, it’s about time a Blackhawk suffered an illegal hit. *Grumble grumble fuckin Adam Burish broke Kes’s nose and Ben Eager scrambled little baby Edler’s brain* Fucking refs* Fuckin NHL and their crush on the babyhawks* Ooooh look at that. Apparently I’m still bitter. Heh.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:28 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Ok, I just saw the commercial for the Craftsman Power Hammer.

I want one, too.

Isn’t it awesome? I’m gonna go look it up. See what it costs. I’ll report back in a minute…
on May 19, 2009 at 9:30 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Hm. $99. Might have to wait until I have a job that requires it. (Or think of one to start.)
on May 19, 2009 at 9:34 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Is Lidstrom’s visor new? Has he been wearing it all this time?
on May 19, 2009 at 9:39 pm Myra

Hmm…$99. Maybe Santa can bring us one.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:43 pm mcguffers

And mcguffers, 50th anniversaries are only half as bad as 100th ones. So the Bills should be fine. :P

Yeah, but football season is only half as long.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:45 pm mcguffers

Oh, and the Bills have this new player. You might have heard of him. I’m sure he won’t bring any drama to the situation. That’s right, Montreal. We’ll show you shenanigans!
on May 19, 2009 at 9:48 pm Patty (in Dallas)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Yay for persistancy (sic).
on May 19, 2009 at 9:48 pm carolbrowne

What is with The Blackhawks? They just don’t stop trying, I guess.
on May 19, 2009 at 9:48 pm Myra

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
on May 19, 2009 at 9:51 pm Myra

Oh, and the Bills have this new player. You might have heard of him. I’m sure he won’t bring any drama to the situation. That’s right, Montreal. We’ll show you shenanigans!

Buffalo, I feel for you and for what you are about to endure. (But I’m really really happy he is no longer in Dallas.)
on May 19, 2009 at 9:59 pm Patty (in Dallas)

This game’s getting a little more interesting.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:04 pm carolbrowne

I’m still getting used to the breaks in the hockey schedule…no hockey until Thursday after this. :-(
on May 19, 2009 at 10:05 pm KenF

no matter how many times the Devils have teased us and let us down, it is always a pleasure to hear Doc call a game.

one (or more) of you lovely ladies have to take him behind the barn and really let him KNOW how much the Devils fans appreciate having him
on May 19, 2009 at 10:07 pm mcguffers

Buffalo, I feel for you and for what you are about to endure. (But I’m really really happy he is no longer in Dallas.)

Don’t worry. You’ll be able to watch it all on his reality show. There’s another diva bitch coming to cable, so watch out Tyra!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:09 pm carolbrowne

one (or more) of you lovely ladies have to take him behind the barn and really let him KNOW how much the Devils fans appreciate having him

Maybe Doc would appreciate a manly touch, if you know what I’m sayin’…

But first, what does Doc look like again? Just checking before I pawn him off to the man folk.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:10 pm Myra

I’m not sure if Doc would survive any of these ladies. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 10:11 pm Schnookie

Maybe Doc would appreciate a manly touch, if you know what I’m sayin’…

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: (And, um, Doc’s not really someone I’d ever even consider joking about taking behind the barn. He’s… sort of like a muppet. With a lot of dignity. :P)
on May 19, 2009 at 10:13 pm mcguffers

He’s… sort of like a muppet. With a lot of dignity. :P

Kind of like Dr. Honeydew
on May 19, 2009 at 10:15 pm Schnookie

Yes! He is VERY MUCH like Dr. Honeydew!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:16 pm carolbrowne

Speaking of someone I’d never take behind the barn – Gary Bettman. He’s a horrid little troll.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:17 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I think I need a deck.

I wonder what kind of tools I’ll need to buy…
on May 19, 2009 at 10:17 pm carolbrowne

Awww! Dr. Benson Honeydew!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:20 pm Myra

Hmm, Patty, I bet one of those power hammers would come in very handy.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:21 pm Schnookie

I am soooo tired today. I’ve gotten almost no stitching done, and I’ve barely paid attention to the game. It’s been TERRIBLE!

And that’s my story.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:23 pm mcguffers

Maybe we could set him up with Mike “Beaker” Ric Hards.

I feel you, Schnookie. I started to reupholster/refinish a chair, and my wrists are sore from removing 3,454,654 chair tacks. And I’m now watching Without a Trace.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:24 pm carolbrowne

I like Datsyuk’s name. It sounds like Gatzukes!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:27 pm carolbrowne

Wow! That was some goal!!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:27 pm Schnookie

Mike “Beaker” Ric Hards. Heh heh heh. (Aw. I miss the Trannies.)

And there’s nothing worse than starting a reupholstery project and not being up for finishing it. :P
on May 19, 2009 at 10:27 pm carolbrowne

I just can’t help it. I like Detroit. I just do.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:27 pm KG

Well that was Soupy’s fault.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:28 pm mcguffers

Sabres Fans: *eyeroll* *snicker*
on May 19, 2009 at 10:29 pm Patty (in Dallas)

DANG IT! Soupy!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:29 pm Myra

Ah, crap. My pretty little Hawks aren’t fairing so well. Poor little fellas.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:29 pm Pookie

It sounds like Gatzukes!

It does, doesn’t it? For some reason tonight I’ve wanted it to sound more like “Matsui”. Makes no sense, I know.

I paid so little attention to that game. This series is just not pulling me in at all. Mr. Beefy needs to be hotter, I guess. Heh.

And on that note, I’m outta here! Good night, everyone!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:30 pm carolbrowne

Nighty night, Pookie!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:33 pm mcguffers

G’night Pookie!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:34 pm Myra

Carol, if Detroit were in your conference, you would not like them at all. Let me assure you.

But they are very good. Nauseatingly so.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:35 pm Myra

Oh and Good Night, Pookie!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:35 pm mcguffers

And there’s nothing worse than starting a reupholstery project and not being up for finishing it. :P

Plus, my knuckles look like I’ve been beating raw meat, a la Rocky. This chair is lucky I like it, or it’d be kindling right now.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:42 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Hmm, Patty, I bet one of those power hammers would come in very handy.

Wow, Myra! I bet you’re right!

Sabres Fans: *eyeroll* *snicker*

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Good night, Pookie!
on May 19, 2009 at 10:43 pm alix

HAHAHAHA. I hate this series so much. But suck it Blackhawks.
on May 19, 2009 at 10:57 pm mcguffers

alix, that is definitely why you’d have my vote for next Versus announcer.
on May 20, 2009 at 8:50 am Amy

He’s… sort of like a muppet. With a lot of dignity. :P

Kind of like Dr. Honeydew

How awesome would a game called by Dr. Honeydew and Beaker be? Swedish Chef could be the ice level reporter. It can’t be worse than some of the broadcasting crews out there.

Sabres Fans: *eyeroll* *snicker*

What she said. And that play was why the Sabres didn’t give him the mythical 5/25, let alone 7/56 or whatever his deal is.
on May 20, 2009 at 10:01 am Pookie

Amy, I would SO tune in to hear an all Muppet broadcast team! Someone, make this happen!
on May 20, 2009 at 10:08 am Schnookie

Good morning, everyone! I have to say, I am delighted at the thought of the Swedish Chef doing sideline reporting for hockey games — I imagine it would be a lot like back before Micheletti moved into the booth.

And it’s my Friday today! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
on May 20, 2009 at 10:23 am KenF

hurray for Fridays.
on May 20, 2009 at 10:26 am Schnookie

And a special hurray for Fridays that happen on Wednesdays. :D
on May 20, 2009 at 7:25 pm alix

Man everyone cleared outta here today, eh?

Vancouver radio is reporting that the Neiderdick brothers want to sign in Vancouver. Ewwwww. I loathe them.
on May 20, 2009 at 7:27 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Neiderdick brothers

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

And I’m so sorry! Don’t let them do it! Keep the brothers you have!
on May 20, 2009 at 7:32 pm Schnookie

Neiderdick brothers

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

And yeah, it’s been pretty slow in these here parts today. It sure didn’t make my work day go any faster, that’s for sure. :P

As for the Niederdicks, man, this is what the Canucks get for letting Mars dick them around this past season. Now everyone thinks they can get away with it. (I’m assuming that the Niederdicks would want to sign with Vancouver, but not play until January, right? :P)
on May 20, 2009 at 7:41 pm alix

Patty, yeah, I like the brother duo we have already. Two brother duos would just be weird.

Schnookie, HA! Damn Mars!

I also don’t see where this magical money is coming from the re sign the Sedins and the Neiderdicks.

Hopefully Gillis will tell them to take a hike. He can only handle one indecisive almost retiree at a time. He’s not superman!
on May 20, 2009 at 7:49 pm Schnookie

He can only handle one indecisive almost retiree at a time. He’s not superman!

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Seriously! Do the Niederdicks think the Canucks are made of money? From what I’ve heard, the team that’s made of money is the Flyers. :P