One Last Open Thread For 2008-2009 « Interchangeable Parts

One Last Open Thread For 2008-2009

June 18, 2009 by Pookie

Every year we watch the NHL Awards and every year we think “this is the worst pain on Earth!” So… uh… join us for the worst pain on Earth! Will Zach win the Lady Byng? Will Beaker when the Selke? Will the musical acts be even more ear-bleedingly-awful than last year?

Posted in Open Thread | 265 Comments

265 Responses

on June 18, 2009 at 7:37 pm Schnookie

Is it over yet?
on June 18, 2009 at 7:38 pm Pookie

Do you feel 110% like you’ll never believe in happiness again as long as you live? Then no.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:39 pm Pookie

How drunk do you think Max Talbot is right now? :D
on June 18, 2009 at 7:40 pm Pookie

OK, I feel like I will never feel happiness ever again as long as I live. All it takes, apparently, is Pete Kane presenting an award.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:40 pm Myra

I know it is awful but hockey players in suits. I can’t resist.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:41 pm Amy

Why does old Pete look slimy, drunky and baked at the same time?
on June 18, 2009 at 7:41 pm Myra

WOOOOOOOO!!! China Doll Cheeks wins!
on June 18, 2009 at 7:43 pm mcguffers

Oops. Missed the beginning of this for a rerun of Bones. Pretty much sums up the hockey season for me.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:43 pm Myra

He needs to take some lessons from Turco. And I don’t mean for his playing.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:44 pm Schnookie

All it takes, apparently, is Pete Kane presenting an award.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Seriously. *Shudder*

And I’m with you, Myra. I watch every year just because I like to see the boys in suits. I’m sorry they’re not in tuxes this year. :( (I’m also sorry that they didn’t have the red carpet on Blersus. Honestly, that’s the best part! And I missed it! BOOOO!)
on June 18, 2009 at 7:44 pm Pookie

And I don’t mean for his playing.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 7:47 pm Myra

Why does old Pete look slimy, drunky and baked at the same time?

I don’t know, most guys end up looking slimy and baked when they are drunk.

Mike Green creaks me out.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:47 pm Amy

You would think Mike Green would get a damn haircut and cut the douche factor in half for tonight.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:47 pm Pookie

OK, compared to having to look at Mike Green, the rest of the awards seems awesome!
on June 18, 2009 at 7:48 pm Schnookie

Can either of these two presenters read?
on June 18, 2009 at 7:48 pm Myra

Ok that is supposed to say “creeps”. I’m not sure what “creaks me out” means.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm mcguffers

Really? We’re not gonna put Datsuuk at the end of the row? No instead make him crawl over the most bored looking girl ever and my 9th grade gym teacher.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm Pookie

Hey, this blows! In the past we’ve gotten to see the nominees in the crowd! Where the fuck is Beaker?!?! THIS SUCKS! (I sound surprised.)
on June 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm Myra

When they showed Mike Richards, Hub yelled, Beaker!
on June 18, 2009 at 7:52 pm Pookie

I’m not sure what “creaks me out” means.

Whatever it means, Chelios does it to all of us, I think.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:52 pm Schnookie

I’m not sure what “creaks me out” means.

It’s because Mike Green is just that much worse than merely creeping a girl out. He goes straight into creaking territory.

The lack of Beaker in this broadcast is very depressing.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:52 pm Pookie

When they showed Mike Richards, Hub yelled, Beaker!

Mission accomplished! :D
on June 18, 2009 at 7:54 pm pam

Hi Guys!

Did someone else win the Lady yet?
on June 18, 2009 at 7:54 pm Myra

Really? We’re not gonna put Datsuuk at the end of the row? No instead make him crawl over the most bored looking girl ever and my 9th grade gym teacher.

For real! I mean, Hello? It’s Datsuyk?

9th grade gym teacher — spot on, mcguffers.

I think next year, they should hire the Ookies and the Irregulars to plan the Awards Show. I’ve planned funerals that were better than this.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:55 pm mcguffers

Pattttyyyyy!!!!!
on June 18, 2009 at 7:56 pm Amy

I’m drowning my outrage at Teppo not being nominated for the Masterton in a bowl of Ben & Jerrys.

Oh look, it’s William Fichtner. He’s a Buffalo boy.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:58 pm Schnookie

I’ve planned funerals that were better than this.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I can’t wait for us to be in charge next year!

And Sullivan winning the Masterton over Zednik is a TRAVESTY.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:58 pm Pookie

I’ve planned funerals that were better than this.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

What the heck is with Sullivan winning this?!?

Also, Pam, you have not missed the Lady Byng.
on June 18, 2009 at 7:59 pm mcguffers

Oh for the love of all that’s holy. Ben Rothlesber..etc??? WTF??? I hate this show.

I think next year, they should hire the Ookies and the Irregulars to plan the Awards Show. I’ve planned funerals that were better than this.

I agree because this is making me think I’d rather be at my funeral right now.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:00 pm Schnookie

When I’m in charge of this show, I’m issuing an edict that Jeremy Roenick never gets shot in hi def. *Vomits copiously*
on June 18, 2009 at 8:00 pm Amy

Schnookie, can we add the Chelios corollary to that edict?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:01 pm pam

I literally cannot endure this shit on TV, so I’m hoping for reports from the rest of you, who were brave enough to watch, to report the winners!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:01 pm Schnookie

Oh for the love of all that’s holy. Ben Rothlesber..etc??? WTF??? I hate this show.

Yeah, I was thinking the douche factor was plenty high already. Why add Roethlisberger to the mix?

I agree because this is making me think I’d rather be at my funeral right now.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:02 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I just joined, and I know I’m always wrong about this, but the lighting is TERRIBLE! Every is blue! Are they holding their breath? Is it supposed to maybe look like it’s really cold in there? Like Mr. Freeze’s lair?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:02 pm mcguffers

Woah! Tim Tom made me laugh! haha “Thank your wife”
on June 18, 2009 at 8:02 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Every BODY is blue. Sheesh.

Kelly Hrudey is SO ADORABLE.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm KG

Zach’s so trying not to cry right now.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm Schnookie

Schnookie, can we add the Chelios corollary to that edict?

He appeared just as I entered that comment. I was like, “AIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I’m going to be seeing Chelios and JR in my nightmares.

WHY ARE THEY NOT SHOWING US THE OTHER NOMINEES? Why is it all reaction shots of Chelios? I want to see Zach being sad!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm pam

KG, please tell me that means he didn’t win it…
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm Pookie

It’s the Annual Pavel Datsyuk Comedy Night!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm Patty (in Dallas)

When I’m in charge of this show, I’m issuing an edict that Jeremy Roenick never gets shot in hi def. *Vomits copiously*

Just imagine when he finally becomes what he was meant to be: a broadcaster!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:04 pm mcguffers

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

the whole row got up for him this time!! What a bunch of maroons!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:05 pm Schnookie

Are they holding their breath? Is it supposed to maybe look like it’s really cold in there? Like Mr. Freeze’s lair?

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:06 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Did they give this show to somebody’s nephew? The crowd’s not even mic’d. Or, maybe there’s really just a handful of people in the audience.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:07 pm KG

I want to see Zach being sad!

That’s the whole point of watching this is to see Zach sad.

And Pam, Zach lost.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:08 pm pam

They should change the name to the Lady Datsuyk award or something. isn’t that like 4 straight?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:09 pm mcguffers

I just joined, and I know I’m always wrong about this, but the lighting is TERRIBLE!

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Patty, for the first time I’ve thought of something I’ve missed about the regular season: finding out what color the ice is with your cable provider on any given night.

Patty: “Is the ice purple on anyone else’s tv?”
on June 18, 2009 at 8:10 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Lady Byng Voters: I’m just gonna pick Datsyuk. I don’t know any of those other guys.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:11 pm KG

Is anyone surprised Zednik didn’t win the Masterton?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:11 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Patty: “Is the ice purple on anyone else’s tv?”

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

It’s only Versus!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:11 pm pam

Later guys…I’m too tired to stare at the computer screen…enjoy (or at least try to enjoy) the rest of the show!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:13 pm Myra

So what was Sullivan’s reason for the Masterton?

Roenick is killing me. And not in a good way. Turco would be so much better. Or how about some of the various announcers. Old what’s his name from Boston would be hilarious I bet.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:13 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Bye, Pam!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Um. Podium mics work from more than an inch away, dude. :P

I’m very snarky today…
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Schnookie

Patty, for the first time I’ve thought of something I’ve missed about the regular season: finding out what color the ice is with your cable provider on any given night.

Patty: “Is the ice purple on anyone else’s tv?”

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

And g’night, Pam! You didn’t tell us how the Devils train was!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Pookie

Patty, for the first time I’ve thought of something I’ve missed about the regular season: finding out what color the ice is with your cable provider on any given night.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::: *gasp* :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

WAH! I miss regular season hockey!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Patty (in Dallas)

OWWW!! MY EYES!

And my ears!

And my stomach! *vomits copiously also*
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm KG

Why does JR keep appearing on my screen? He’s really starting to scare me. :/
on June 18, 2009 at 8:14 pm Schnookie

You know what this show needed? It needed Goose teaching everyone the fundamentals of reading.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:15 pm mcguffers

:^}————– <- mcguggs drooling.

Oh come on now! I have to go from Ethan Moreau to Roenick and that guy?!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:15 pm Schnookie

OWWW!! MY EYES!

And my ears!

And my stomach! *vomits copiously also*

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:16 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I think yours is blue, too, you just don’t know it! The clips of people outside the theater are normal-colored!

Do y’all think the audience members look normal, too? Maybe it IS just me.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:16 pm Amy

Does Roenick have photos of someone with a goat or something? He’s everywhere!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:17 pm Schnookie

Wait, MORE Roenick? Christ. If he shows up at my funeral, please, someone just cut his mic.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:17 pm mcguffers

It needed Goose teaching everyone the fundamentals of reading.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Goose was apparently busy because they sent Adam Mair instead.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm Patty (in Dallas)

It needed Goose teaching everyone the fundamentals of reading.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Turns out it wasn’t Toronto that was holding back the Awards show.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm mcguffers

Do y’all think the audience members look normal, too? Maybe it IS just me.

Nothing about this show is normal.

Oh. My. God. Shaka Khan.

I’ll be back in about 15 minutes.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm Schnookie

Do y’all think the audience members look normal, too? Maybe it IS just me.

No, the lighting is definitely retarded. I guess I should be glad they’re not showing Zach or Beaks.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:18 pm pam

back for a sec…The Train Ride was surprisingly fun! Like a class trip! We’ll give an official report soon!

G’night!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:19 pm Patty (in Dallas)

If he shows up at my funeral, please, someone just cut his mic.

Roenick (actual quote): Normally I’m pretty good in front of a mic. You guys all know that.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:19 pm Amy

Instead of a “tribute to the fans” let’s just call it what it is: an opportunity for Chaka Khan to kill some music.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:19 pm Myra

Shaka Khan. Really. Are there no mirrors backstage.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:20 pm Schnookie

Turns out it wasn’t Toronto that was holding back the Awards show.

Nothing about this show is normal.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Man, we are all this show is missing. We’d have made it so perfect!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:20 pm Pookie

Good night, Pam!

Did I miss V.E. Mats up on the big screen?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:20 pm Patty (in Dallas)

What was THAT all about? That’s the best they could do?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:22 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I’m crossing my fingers that the video game cover curse is still around. :P
on June 18, 2009 at 8:23 pm Myra

I wonder what Crunchy would say about Shaka Khan’s outfit?

And Patty, we are all being snarky tonight. There is no other way to get through this otherwise. I think alcohol might make it more frightening. Especially Roenick.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:24 pm Pookie

Oooh, good thinking, Patty! (I think that only works for Madden football. Think Madden Football wants Ovie on the cover? How can we make that happen?!)
on June 18, 2009 at 8:25 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I used to have SUCH the crush on William Fichtner, back when he was on my soap. Sigh.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:25 pm Schnookie

I will not rest until we’ve gotten Ovechkin on the cover of Madden Football. WILL. NOT. REST.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:26 pm Amy

I wonder what Crunchy would say about Shaka Khan’s outfit?

Crunchy: “Sparkles, nude fabric, empire waists and camel toe are all fashion donts.”
on June 18, 2009 at 8:26 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Think Madden Football wants Ovie on the cover?

Doesn’t everybody?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:28 pm Schnookie

Tim Thomas should be thanking Marty for getting hurt this year. :P
on June 18, 2009 at 8:28 pm KG

Awe Tim Thomas is making me swoon.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:28 pm Patty (in Dallas)

He’s charming me JUST a little, too.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:29 pm Myra

Tony Esposito was freaking me out.

Ok, I know he is a Ruin but I secretly have a crush on Tim Tom.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:29 pm Amy

Me too, KG. Me too. The emotion he shows is so refreshing from the memorized speeches we’ve seen so far.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:29 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Kevin Smith thinks he’s the shit, doesn’t he? yuck.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:30 pm Pookie

Crunchy: “Sparkles, nude fabric, empire waists and camel toe are all fashion donts.”

Roy-Z: Pardon me?!? *death glare*
on June 18, 2009 at 8:31 pm Pookie

Kevin Smith thinks he’s the shit, doesn’t he? yuck.

Hey, that’s a Devils fan you’re talking about! Go Devils! [Gretzky] yeah!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:31 pm Schnookie

I adore Kevin Smith. You’re just jealous, Patty, that you don’t have an awesome high-profile fan of your team. :PPPPPP

Roy-Z: Pardon me?!? *death glare*

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:31 pm Myra

Kevin Smith thinks he’s the shit, doesn’t he? yuck.

My sentiments exactly. Bleh.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:32 pm Schnookie

[Gretzky] yeah!

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:33 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize y’all were fans of his. @@@
on June 18, 2009 at 8:33 pm Amy

Roy-Z: Pardon me?!? *death glare*

Oh, shut it, Roy-Z.

And Pat Burns looks fantastic.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:34 pm Schnookie

Julien is reminding me right now why I don’t miss having him on our pregame Coach’s Corner segments. *YAWN*
on June 18, 2009 at 8:34 pm Pookie

Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize y’all were fans of his. @@@

I don’t like his movies (although as a good Jerseyian, I do have to say I like Clerks) but I like that he’s a real Devils fan.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:34 pm Schnookie

Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize y’all were fans of his. @@@

Heh. I’m a fan of his approach to being a Devils fan. :D

And yeah, Pat Burns looks surprisingly good.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:35 pm Patty (in Dallas)

OH MY GOSH! What’s with Bettman’s face!?!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm mcguffers

Crunchy: “Sparkles, nude fabric, empire waists and camel toe are all fashion donts.”

Roy-Z: Pardon me?!? *death glare*

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Yeah, Clerks was about the only one I liked.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm mcguffers

Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize y’all were fans of his. @@@

I was one of the five people who liked Mallrats
on June 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm Pookie

Hey, I just figured the Messier Leadership Award out! It’s to make the Lady Byng look less pussy-ish!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:37 pm Schnookie

It’s to make the Lady Byng look less pussy-ish!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That’s GOT to be it!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:38 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I bet Ovie will be on the cover of Katamari next year, too.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:38 pm Myra

OH MY GOSH! What’s with Bettman’s face!?!

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 18, 2009 at 8:40 pm mcguffers

Ok, I really do crack up when that Old Navy commercial shows the “One armed push up” with the mannequin that lost his arm.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:40 pm Amy

Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize y’all were fans of his. @@@

Dogma was pretty good.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:40 pm Meg

I was one of the five people who liked Mallrats

I liked Mallrats! Of course I also like SLC Punk when I was a teenager so that’s not exactly a ringing endorsement.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:43 pm Myra

Help me out, who is Kevin Connally? One of the Hobbitt dudes?

Chara looks awfully nice tonight. What is it with me and Boston tonight. I must be feverish.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:44 pm Meg

Yay! I’m so glad Green didn’t win.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:44 pm Schnookie

Okay, I’ll trade a shot of sad Zach for that shot of stunned Mike Green. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:44 pm Pookie

Sweet! He missed seeing Zach’s heart break but instead we get to see Mike Green losing! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:44 pm Patty (in Dallas)

YAY ZEEEEEEEEE!!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:45 pm Amy

Help me out, who is Kevin Connally?

He’s on Entourage.

Chara’s kind of adorable up there.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:45 pm mcguffers

He’s from Entourage. I love that they had him present the award to the tallest guy in the NHL
on June 18, 2009 at 8:46 pm Meg

If this was the Oscars he’d have been played off ages ago.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:46 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Oh my gosh, he’s even sweeter than I already thought!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:47 pm mcguffers

I HATE that I love a Bruin right now.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:47 pm Patty (in Dallas)

What a great speech!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:48 pm KG

Geno’s so adorable.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:48 pm Meg

“My teammates…and stuff.” I love it.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:49 pm Schnookie

Dude, Zdeno just would not shut up! I mean, he’s adorable, but yeah, Meg, he needed that Oscars orchestra big style.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:49 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Ovie can’t wait one second until it’s his turn. He has to get in Geno’s shot.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:49 pm Meg

Or was that staff?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:49 pm mcguffers

When they get offstage, Ovie will translate that joke to Geno.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:52 pm KG

What didi Ovie say? I was totally tuning him out and missed his joke.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:52 pm Amy

My mother just asked me if Lindy and Darcy are there representing the Sabres. I just glared at her.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:54 pm KG

Is Zach hiding or does the camera not like him? I haven’t seen him since the red carpet.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:55 pm Pookie

I missed the red carpet so I haven’t seen a lick of Zach or Beaks! This is TERRIBLE!
on June 18, 2009 at 8:55 pm Myra

I have not seen Sid once. Is he there?
on June 18, 2009 at 8:56 pm KG

I’m sure Zach’s interview from the red carpet will be on youtube soon.
on June 18, 2009 at 8:58 pm mcguffers

What didi Ovie say? I was totally tuning him out and missed his joke.

I’m not sure who he was slamming more, but he compared Malkin English to Datsuuk English.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:00 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I’m not sure who he was slamming more, but he compared Malkin English to Datsuuk English.

He probably translated it, then cackled loudly, and Malkin just pointed at the Cup and walked off rolling his eyes. :P
on June 18, 2009 at 9:02 pm Myra

I love Michael’s music but wouldn’t you want someone a little more prestigious to present this award?
on June 18, 2009 at 9:02 pm Patty (in Dallas)

BOOOOOOOOOOO!! I should have been MALKIN!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:03 pm Pookie

Malkin just pointed at the Cup and walked off rolling his eyes.

Heh. And then Max Talbot hit him on the head with the Cup.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:03 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Ergh.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:04 pm Pookie

I SURVIVED ANOTHER AWARDS SHOW! WOOOOOOO!!!!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:05 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I love Michael’s music but wouldn’t you want someone a little more prestigious to present this award?

I gather he’s a singer, then?
on June 18, 2009 at 9:05 pm Schnookie

I SURVIVED ANOTHER AWARDS SHOW! WOOOOOOO!!!!

It is AMAZING how much more tolerable it is when Ron McLean isn’t hosting it.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:07 pm Myra

I gather he’s a singer, then?

Yep, big band, torch song singer type.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:07 pm Patty (in Dallas)

It is AMAZING how much more tolerable it is when Ron McLean isn’t hosting it.

And yet it was still barely tolerable! :P
on June 18, 2009 at 9:08 pm Schnookie

And yet it was still barely tolerable! :P

Well, yes. But that says a lot about how bad it normally is.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:09 pm mcguffers

Ladies, I’d like to thank you again for getting me through another night of an NHL debacle. Failure to Launch is on right now. I’m muting all the parts that Bradley Cooper’s not in.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:14 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I’m muting all the parts that Bradley Cooper’s not in.

Nice!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:20 pm Schnookie

Oh my god. Failure To Launch is the only thing I can think of that’s worse than the NHL Awards. We watched it during the Christmas break before last, figuring it was at least handsome enough to be worth the time. NO. IT IS NOT.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:21 pm SueNJ97

My take:

Tim Thomas was actually the best thing about the awards show. I sort of like him now.

I’m still debating who is uglier, Messier or Bettman, and I think Messier wins just because Bettman is shorter and therefore there is more of Messier and therefore more ugliness.

I believe Messier had to be told he could not award the Messier Leadership award to himself, and that he HAD to choose someone who was still playing. Otherwise he would simply walk out on stage and hand the award to himself each year.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:24 pm Schnookie

Otherwise he would simply walk out on stage and hand the award to himself each year.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: It’s TOTALLY a struggle every year to get him to relinquish the trophy to someone else. Not that any of them want it. I love Iginla “accidentally” forgetting to take it with him when he left the podium. Heh.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:25 pm mcguffers

Failure To Launch is the only thing I can think of that’s worse than the NHL Awards.

Yup, it’s pretty bad. That’s how much I love me some Cooper blue eyes.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:27 pm Myra

I’ve been watching the Red Carpet interviews on NHL.com. At least we get to see a few more of the players. Just saw Beaker and Parise. But it is pretty bad as well. These people really need help.

And I agee Sue, Tim Thomas was by far the best thing about the awards.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:28 pm Pookie

That’s how much I love me some Cooper blue eyes.

You need to keep a copy of “Wet, Hot” around! It’s imminently rewatchable and he’s hilarious in it!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:33 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Go see The Hangover!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:36 pm mcguffers

You need to keep a copy of “Wet, Hot” around! It’s imminently rewatchable and he’s hilarious in it!

Done…

Go see The Hangover!

and done.

(I’ve actually only made it through 3/4 of WHAS cause I had to get ready for work, but I’ve never been so attracted to an extremely gay camp counselor in 80’s shorts before)
on June 18, 2009 at 9:38 pm Schnookie

but I’ve never been so attracted to an extremely gay camp counselor in 80’s shorts before

He really wears it well, doesn’t he? :D
on June 18, 2009 at 9:43 pm SueNJ97

If you think about it, they took an hour and a half to give out awards to basically 7 different people (if you include the traditional awards and only the ones people voted on, not the ones pre-determined by season stats). The fact that there were some multiple winners makes it look worse, but here’s the list – this is what took 90 minutes:

Mason
Ovechkin
Datsyuk
Sullivan
Thomas
Julien
Chara
on June 18, 2009 at 9:46 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Next up? The Draft. Then a gaping chasm. Otherwise known as the off-season.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:50 pm SueNJ97

Next up? The Draft. Then a gaping chasm. Otherwise known as the off-season.

But, there’s always July 1st, the day when certain GMs in the league either load up on coke, or just go insane without the help of drugs.

Also, with the CBA, they can talk to RFA’s a week before, so there’s always the possibility that Edmonton will make another massive offer sheet!!!!

WOOOHOOOO!!!
on June 18, 2009 at 9:50 pm Myra

Don’t forget Prospect Camp. Grace can’t wait to see that young goalie Beskorowany.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:52 pm Schnookie

Ooooh! Offer sheet season! I have high hopes for this summer’s offer sheet prospects!

And Prospect Camp doesn’t count for those of us who live in a market with a complete media blackout prior to regular-season opening night. :P
on June 18, 2009 at 9:53 pm Myra

I don’t even want to think about what else Nieuwy might have up his sleeve.
on June 18, 2009 at 9:56 pm Pookie

Aw man! Beaker lost the Selke by three votes! Poor guy!
on June 18, 2009 at 10:15 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Who won the Selke? (I came in late.)

Yeah, July 1 should be fun. THEN the chasm will gape. :D
on June 18, 2009 at 10:18 pm SueNJ97

Who won the Selke? (I came in late.)

Datsyuk. He won the Selke and the Byng. Gave the same speech for both.
on June 18, 2009 at 10:40 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Thanks Sue! Saves me from having to watch it on TiVo. :D
on June 18, 2009 at 10:44 pm mcguffers

this movie is horrible. Even muted.
on June 18, 2009 at 10:54 pm Patty (in Dallas)

this movie is horrible. Even muted.

Even with Bradley Cooper?
on June 18, 2009 at 10:57 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I just have to say that I think Luongo’s short ringlets are pretty hot. He looks great with that haircut.

Plus, I give him kudos for not pulling a handful of hair in front into a point like all the kids do. That is the DUMBEST look. I know it makes me sound like an old lady, but I just can’t help it. They all look like Ed Grimley.
on June 18, 2009 at 11:01 pm mcguffers

Even with Bradley Cooper?

I should just put pictures of him on my desktop.
on June 19, 2009 at 5:30 am Grrrreg

Good morning!

I just read your comments about the awards show. It looks like for once, it was a good thing to be prevented from watching something hockey-related because of the time difference!

I’m now leaving Paris for two days, to attend a third wedding in only 2 months… I’m litterally surrounded by people getting married and/or having babies. I know it’s a normal phase, but I’m really really not there yet, so this is just creepy to watch!
on June 19, 2009 at 6:49 am Schnookie

Good morning, everyone!

And yeah, Grrrreg, you are a WAY better person for not having watched the awards show. I’m sorry you’re stuck going to tons of weddings (my approach to limiting that sort of thing is to not have any friends), but really, a million creepy weddings is still better than the NHL Awards Show.

this movie is horrible. Even muted.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you, mcguggs!
on June 19, 2009 at 8:21 am Grrrreg

I’m sorry you’re stuck going to tons of weddings (my approach to limiting that sort of thing is to not have any friends)

The weddings themselves are usually rather fun, it’s just the ‘oh boy, what’s happening to all of them?!’ feeling that’s weird!
I’m off to catch my train, have a good weekend!
on June 19, 2009 at 8:22 am Schnookie

Have a great time!
on June 19, 2009 at 8:47 am Amy

Beaker lost the Selke by three votes! Poor guy!

Mirtle posted the full results. Travis and Zach were 7 & 8 in the voting respectively.

And Crunchy finished 28th in the voting for the Lady Byng. I got a good chuckle out of that.
on June 19, 2009 at 9:04 am Schnookie

Travis and Zach were 7 & 8 in the voting respectively.

I saw that! I suspect Travis is going to lord it over Zach FOREVER that he beat him in the Selke voting. He’ll be all, “I’m sorry, but would Robin really have more Selke votes than Batman? I rest my case.” (I was very proud of Beaks that he got more first-place votes than Datsyuk, in case anyone was wondering…)
on June 19, 2009 at 9:17 am Amy

“I’m sorry, but would Robin really have more Selke votes than Batman? I rest my case.”

But Batman did get more votes than Robin for the Hart Trophy.

I just can’t figure out who voted for Roy-Z for the Selke. Did Roy bedazzle something for someone and that someone was repaying a debt?
on June 19, 2009 at 9:20 am Schnookie

But Batman did get more votes than Robin for the Hart Trophy.

Travis: “No, that was Robin. I’m Batman. And quit raining on my parade.”

The Selke voting list is hilarious. I think just about every forward in the league got at least one vote, didn’t they? (Except Pando. He got squat. :P)
on June 19, 2009 at 9:38 am Pookie

(I was very proud of Beaks that he got more first-place votes than Datsyuk, in case anyone was wondering…)

I feel like that should be enough for him to win! Waaaaah!

Good morning, everyone! When I left for the work the sun was out and I actually needed sunglasses! Then the closer I got to work the grayer the coulds got. Not cook, universe, not cook.
on June 19, 2009 at 9:45 am Pookie

OK, normally I don’t care about this shit but I have to say I’m outraged that Robin finished fifth in the Hart voting. That’s ridonkulous! Some a-holes out there voted for Steve Mason over him! Are you fucking serious?!? Fucking West Coast bias. :PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
on June 19, 2009 at 9:47 am Schnookie

Some a-holes out there voted for Steve Mason over him! Are you fucking serious?!? Fucking West Coast bias.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Worst. East Coast bias. EVER. :P
on June 19, 2009 at 9:51 am Amy

Fucking West Coast bias.

That’s a sentence I never thought I’d see.

And what is this that next year there will be two Expletive Deleted Stupid Ice Bowls? One in Boston and one in Calgary. Talk about too much of a good thing.
on June 19, 2009 at 9:54 am Schnookie

Talk about too much of a good thing.

Hee! Imagine how those of us who never thought it was a good thing at all feel about TWO of them! :P
on June 19, 2009 at 10:05 am SueNJ97

I’m now leaving Paris for two days, to attend a third wedding in only 2 months… I’m litterally surrounded by people getting married and/or having babies. I know it’s a normal phase, but I’m really really not there yet, so this is just creepy to watch!

I remember that, although for me, most of my friends finished up the marrying and having kids around 5/6 years ago at the latest – the last wedding I went to was two years ago.

The part which became uncomfortable for me was actually work. As the women I worked with married and had children, the fact that I didn’t want children and wasn’t married was something that bothered them. I really didn’t talk about it, but women would walk into my office, talk about their kids and their husbands and then ask me, point-blank, when I was going to get married and have a family like everyone else my age. I didn’t have this problem with the men or with my close friends. But I was definitely considered odd by women at the office.
on June 19, 2009 at 10:22 am Caitlin

But I was definitely considered odd by women at the office.

Aww, I’m sorry, Sue. I know the feeling, though. A girl told me the other day that I should be married with a baby on the way “by now”. Er…. yeah.

talk about their kids and their husbands and then ask me, point-blank, when I was going to get married and have a family like everyone else my age

I always find this so, so rude. I have no idea why people feel that because you’re single and childless and have no plans to steer away from that route that they can be so impolite about the subject.

All the people I went to high school with are getting married and having babies now. Seeing old classmates spawning is unnerving. I have two weddings to attend in the fall. Should be fun.

Hey, -Ookies, in random news: Did you guys see that Kathy Barrick is selling old, non-Carriage House (I think) patterns on Etsy?
on June 19, 2009 at 10:23 am Morgan

Another awards show come and gone. It’s nice to know that both the media (Hart) and players themselves (LBP Award) don’t give a fuck about defense and gave both awards to Ovie. Datsyuk is by far the most complete player out there, so he gets the Selke and the Byng? Whatevs.

The only thought I had about Parise being in Vegas was him trying to get the “Zach Parise Vegas Charitable Cribbage Tournament” off the ground in his hotel room while all the other NHLers were getting lapdances.
on June 19, 2009 at 10:36 am Schnookie

Did you guys see that Kathy Barrick is selling old, non-Carriage House (I think) patterns on Etsy?

Oooh, intriguing! We’ll have to check that out!

The only thought I had about Parise being in Vegas was him trying to get the “Zach Parise Vegas Charitable Cribbage Tournament” off the ground in his hotel room while all the other NHLers were getting lapdances.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He probably spent all his time in Vegas chasing after his fellow NHLers, crying, “I say, chappie! Not just one quick round of cribbage?”
on June 19, 2009 at 11:55 am Pookie

The only thought I had about Parise being in Vegas was him trying to get the “Zach Parise Vegas Charitable Cribbage Tournament” off the ground in his hotel room while all the other NHLers were getting lapdances.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::: *gasp* ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

You know it!

Did you guys see that Kathy Barrick is selling old, non-Carriage House (I think) patterns on Etsy?

Innnnnnnnnnnnnnteresting! *runs to go check it out*
on June 19, 2009 at 11:56 am Pam

Aww, I’m sorry, Sue. I know the feeling, though. A girl told me the other day that I should be married with a baby on the way “by now”. Er…. yeah.

Caitlin, that’s effed up…your reply should have been “blow it out your ass”
on June 19, 2009 at 12:06 pm SueNJ97

Caitlin, that’s effed up…your reply should have been “blow it out your ass”

I’d tend to agree, except you have to work with them. And, if you say that to them, you get reported to HR, which tends to be run by women who think the same way as your questioners. If you explain that they were in your office asking unprofessional personal questions, you’ll be blamed. I was reported for simply telling them that I didn’t think the conversation was appropriate.
on June 19, 2009 at 12:11 pm Pam

Yes, Sue, you are correct. Unfortunately, it is best to hold your tongue in that case.

I’m still in grad school, working with mostly men, and the women who are around never bring this stuff up. It’s hard to think about families and that stuff when you’re so deeply involved with school. I guess it greatly depends on the situation.
on June 19, 2009 at 12:11 pm Pam

PS – I love the idea of Zach wanting to have a go at cribbage instead of hookers in Vegas!
on June 19, 2009 at 12:16 pm SueNJ97

PS – I love the idea of Zach wanting to have a go at cribbage instead of hookers in Vegas!

Maybe Zach insists that his hookers play cribbage (before, of course).
on June 19, 2009 at 12:23 pm andrew

Hey everyone! Happy Friday! I watched about 5 minutes of the awards show last night so I don’t have a lot of input. I saw Timmy Thomas win the Vezina and Kevin Smith get bleeped out by the NHL. That was pretty funny. But it looks like it was a good open thread last night!

Of course I also like SLC Punk when I was a teenager so that’s not exactly a ringing endorsement.

Woot! SLC Punk is a great movie! Did you know that’s future superstar Jason Segel playing Mike, the psychotic preppy punk rock kid? Great stuff.

Also, I love Kevin Smith. Mallrats is a fine movie. Then again, vulgar comedy is pretty much my bread-and-butter, so I guess it’s no surprise.

Amy, I didn’t know William Fitchner was a WNYer. That’s cool. I like that guy. He was great in the Dark Knight.
on June 19, 2009 at 12:29 pm Schnookie

I watched about 5 minutes of the awards show last night so I don’t have a lot of input.

I am SO jealous. Heh.
on June 19, 2009 at 12:33 pm andrew

I am SO jealous. Heh.

Ha! Yeah, I had to go for a run. It took precedence over whatever the NHL was shovelling.

And oh man, on the whole “married with kids” thing. We put up with that shit for years. What a bunch of poo. The families have finally stopped bugging us about when we’re having babies. It only took us saying “probably never” about a thousand times.
on June 19, 2009 at 12:38 pm Schnookie

It only took us saying “probably never” about a thousand times.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: This is where being a spinster sister is so easy. No one’s ever bugged Pookie and me about that crap because we’ve had “SPINSTER CRAZY CAT LADY” stamped on our foreheads since we were kids. :P
on June 19, 2009 at 12:59 pm Pam

Speaking of being a “crazy cat lady,” you guys should check out the Cat Expo sponsored by the Garden State Cat Club! It’s in July.

http://www.gardenstatecatclub.org/
on June 19, 2009 at 12:59 pm SueNJ97

The funny thing was, I wasn’t really opposed to getting married, if I met the right person, I just knew I should not have children, I have zero interest in them (and contrary to what people with children say, not everyone suddenly develops a keen interest in their own just because they gave birth to them).

But what I didn’t realize until my late 30s was that being honest with the men I was seeing about my lack of interest in children made it unlikely that I would have a relationship. It’s not that you can’t find someone who doesn’t want children. But, most men who don’t want children are very leery of women who really don’t want children. What they want are women who will give up their own dreams of having children for the relationship. They tend to consider women who never wanted children oddities as well. Maybe I’m just not meeting the right people – but it’s not a comforting thing.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:09 pm Amy

I love the idea of Zach wanting to have a go at cribbage instead of hookers in Vegas!

Maybe Zach insists that his hookers play cribbage (before, of course).

There’s a hookers and blow joke in there somewhere. I just can’t find it.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:10 pm Pookie

It only took us saying “probably never” about a thousand times.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Hey, have you harvested any of your potatoes yet this year? Everywhere I go I see blog posts where people have been digging up new potatoes. I think I’m getting Potato Fever. I just reeeeaelly need to peek under the soil one of these days, I think.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:24 pm Schnookie

There’s a hookers and blow joke in there somewhere. I just can’t find it.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I can’t find it either. Heh.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:26 pm andrew

Hey, have you harvested any of your potatoes yet this year?

I actually didn’t plant any this year. I went with lettuce instead. I planted one stinkin’ packet of spicy mesclun salad mix seeds and I have been eating about a pound of lettuce daily every since. I can’t give the stuff away fast enough. I finally stopped clipping the mustard greens for salad, I just let them grow to be huge, then cut ‘em down and sautee them. I also stopped harvesting the arugula, I let them go too. I harvested a ton last week and made two batches of arugula pesto. The bed is finally almost through it’s run. When it’s done I’ll just be planting a cover crop. So I take it you haven’t starting pulling up any potatoes yet?

I think I’m getting Potato Fever.

I think there’s a pill for that.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:27 pm andrew

There’s a hookers and blow joke in there somewhere. I just can’t find it.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I can’t find it either. Heh.

Don’t worry guys, I’ll find the hookers and blow. You can count on me!

Wait…what? Oooohhh…a hookers and blow joke? Oh, okay, never mind then.
on June 19, 2009 at 1:29 pm Schnookie

Wow! Sounds like quite the bounteous bounty of lettuces! And sounds like you’re making delicious use of it. (Pookie keeps insisting she wants to plant lettuce because it comes up so quickly and is so pretty. But we get so freakin’ much from our farm that it would be a complete waste of the lettuce’s time to plant it ourselves.)

I think there’s a pill for that.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 19, 2009 at 1:35 pm Schnookie

Don’t worry guys, I’ll find the hookers and blow. You can count on me!

Wait…what? Oooohhh…a hookers and blow joke? Oh, okay, never mind then.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
on June 19, 2009 at 1:42 pm Mags

I think there’s a pill for that.

:^::::::::::::::::::

Don’t worry guys, I’ll find the hookers and blow. You can count on me!

Wait…what? Oooohhh…a hookers and blow joke? Oh, okay, never mind then.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::: again.

As for spinster, I overheard one of my ex-boyfriends telling someone that I was “three cats away from being a spinster”. I got all huffy and offended, and then told my Mummers. She said something to the effect of “Get 3 cats, and then go have a mad love affair with a hockey player. See how he feels then”. I think I might do just that, heh. (I twittered about it, sorry for the repeat for those who’ve read it.)
on June 19, 2009 at 1:45 pm Pam

Mags, where can we find you on Twitter?
on June 19, 2009 at 1:47 pm Schnookie

“Get 3 cats, and then go have a mad love affair with a hockey player. See how he feels then”.

HA! I’ve taken care of step one…
on June 19, 2009 at 1:48 pm Mags

Pam, right here
on June 19, 2009 at 1:52 pm Pam

Excellent..I am now stalking – err, following – you!

Also: http://twitter.com/pamcar
on June 19, 2009 at 1:55 pm Mags

Excellent..I am now stalking – err, following – you!

Insert obligatory “Are you stalking me? Because that would be super” joke here ;)
on June 19, 2009 at 1:59 pm andrew

Sounds like quite the bounteous bounty of lettuces! And sounds like you’re making delicious use of it.

Trying to anyway! The pesto turned out very good and I’m going to try a new recipe for the greens this weekend. It’s a soup with mustard greens and sweet potato. I think it sounds interesting, I might add some sort of meat, I think something like andouille or linguica would be good in it.

Pookie keeps insisting she wants to plant lettuce because it comes up so quickly and is so pretty. But we get so freakin’ much from our farm that it would be a complete waste of the lettuce’s time to plant it ourselves.

I hear ya. I haven’t bought so much as a leaf in two months. If you’re already getting it from your CSA, there’d just be no way to eat it all.
on June 19, 2009 at 2:09 pm Caitlin

I’ve just decided my goal in life is to be Auntie Mame minus the men. I don’t think Rosalind Russell as Mame is a bad role model, no? And then I can take my nephews on wacky hijinks and teach them how to make martinis for Lithuanian bishops. It’ll be fantabulous.

No one’s ever bugged Pookie and me about that crap because we’ve had “SPINSTER CRAZY CAT LADY” stamped on our foreheads since we were kids. :P

I’m pretty sure I have “SPINSTER CRAZY CAT LADY” stamped on my head too, but I definitely get bugged about it. People say spinster like it’s a bad thing.
on June 19, 2009 at 3:41 pm carolbrowne

I can’t wait for us to be in charge next year!

Oh yes! I’ll be in charge of the photos! Funny, according to my documentation of the event, there was not a single woman at the event. Just hockey players in suits! RAWR!
on June 19, 2009 at 3:51 pm Pookie

People say spinster like it’s a bad thing.

I know! Sheesh! :D
on June 19, 2009 at 3:53 pm Schnookie

People say spinster like it’s a bad thing.

Those people are INSANE. :^:::::::::::::::::::::

Funny, according to my documentation of the event, there was not a single woman at the event. Just hockey players in suits! RAWR!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I’ll be your editor. And I’ll yell at you if you so much as THINK of including a picture that isn’t a foxy player in a foxy suit. I mean, don’t even bother with the retired old guys. Or the ugly young guys. :P
on June 19, 2009 at 4:00 pm carolbrowne

I mean, don’t even bother with the retired old guys. Or the ugly young guys. :P

I’ll be brutal in screening for hotness. Don’t you worry.

And on the topic of spinster cat ladies and people all, “When are you going to have kids?” Mike & I don’t want any. Ever. A married couple that doesn’t want kids? Some people just can’t seem to figure that out. Including some family members. Are you sure? Oh, you’ll change your mind…we get that all the time. I think it’s so. tacky.

And that’s my story.
on June 19, 2009 at 4:07 pm Schnookie

I think you and Mike should have a convention for married couples who don’t want kids, and andrew and Tracie could come to it! Safety in numbers, right?
on June 19, 2009 at 4:08 pm Schnookie

I actually had a boss once who introduced herself to me — during my interview for the job — by saying, “Hi, I’m Nancy, I’m 51, married, and don’t have kids by choice.” I’ve kind of held her up as my hero ever since. :D
on June 19, 2009 at 4:14 pm SueNJ97

People say spinster like it’s a bad thing.

I think my cats would deadlock 1-1 against a move out of spinsterhood. Eric’s opinion would be, “Feedings will not increase, I vote, NO!” and Claude would say,”Someone else to pay attention to me, yes please, YES!!!!”
on June 19, 2009 at 4:44 pm Caitlin

by saying, “Hi, I’m Nancy, I’m 51, married, and don’t have kids by choice.” I’ve kind of held her up as my hero ever since. :D

Dude, that’s awesome…! That’s pretty cool.

The kids subject just seems to be an open door for people to be incredibly tacky and hurtful. When I told someone that I would never have kids, they told me I would never have a “complete world view” and “life doesn’t mean anything until you have kids”. Responding to it, like Pam and Sue said, is tricky. Ugh.

Eric’s opinion would be, “Feedings will not increase, I vote, NO!” and Claude would say,”Someone else to pay attention to me, yes please, YES!!!!”

My cat would just view it as a terrible burden. He would be pissed that he had to share my attention with someone else.
on June 19, 2009 at 5:29 pm carolbrowne

Oh goodie! That’s 5 people at the convention. I’m with that crew!

Being a mom never seemed like a viable work option for me. Like who’s going to take care of the kid? Anyone? Anyone?
on June 19, 2009 at 5:47 pm andrew

I think you and Mike should have a convention for married couples who don’t want kids, and andrew and Tracie could come to it!

Word! We’ll be there!
on June 19, 2009 at 5:49 pm andrew

Wait, there’s gonna be food, right? If there’s no free food we might be busy that weekend.
on June 19, 2009 at 6:35 pm SueNJ97

Being a mom never seemed like a viable work option for me. Like who’s going to take care of the kid? Anyone? Anyone?

Well, there is my business partner and his wife, I actually met him through his wife, who is one of my oldest friends, we went to college together. She never intended to get married or to have a child.

Lo and behold, she was unemployed, they were living together, they discuss having a child and she finally said, something like, “You know I’m going back to work, you know what I’m like when I work (she works insane hours) so, we can have a child, but you are going to be the primary caregiver. That’s it. It’s the only way it’s happening.”

He agreed, they got married when she was about 8 months pregnant and he IS the primary caregiver. He works from home. He sees their daughter off to school, then sits down to his computer. At 4pm he meets the bus and then deals with her and with business, sort of simultaneously. At times, it’s hilarious.
on June 21, 2009 at 10:58 pm mcguffers

There’s a hookers and blow joke in there somewhere. I just can’t find it.

First sign of hockey withdrawal.

Now if we were NHL players, then the first sign of hockey withdrawal would be if we weren’t able to find actual hookers and blow.
on June 22, 2009 at 7:09 am Schnookie

Good morning, everyone! Whew, what a busy weekend we had — KtG is in town and we had a little “cousins weekend” meet-up with our cousin from Boulder. I’m exhausted from all this human interaction (and in deep interwebs withdrawal, since I barely had my computer on all weekend — looks like I didn’t miss much, though…). So how’s everyone doing?
on June 22, 2009 at 9:07 am Amy

Sounds like you had a great weekend, Schnookie.

I had dinner with the family last night, which just was a trainwreck of epic proportions. My grandfather was upset that my aunt (my mom’s sister) hadn’t called him in over three weeks, my great aunt complained about the food, and the biker sitting at the table behind us doused his food with malt vinegar, thereby clearing out my sinuses.

But on the good side, with all the rain we’ve had, my plants are taking off. The hollyhocks are almost as tall as the floor of the porch, and my cherry tomato plant has actual tomatoes on it. The plant is uglier than sin, but there’s real tomatoes on it. I can almost taste them now!
on June 22, 2009 at 9:11 am Pookie

Good morning, everyone!

For four years I’ve driven past this totally wild 50’s-esque sign for a motel on my commute to work and for four years I’ve thought, “Man, if that place weren’t so sketchy, I’d stop and take pictures!” Finally this morning I got to work early enough and got over my fear of sketchiness enough to stop the car, get out, and take pictures! I got some strange looks and was sure my car was going to be stolen in the five minutes I was standing by the sign but still! I’m so pleased with myself! I did something I’ve wanted to do for a long time and something that I was scared to do! WOOOOO!!!
on June 22, 2009 at 9:31 am Schnookie

Amy, that dinner sounds DREADFUL! I’m so sorry! We actually had some fond chuckles with our cousin about some horrible family dinners from back in the day — maybe we were channeling some sort of vibe from you? :P

And seriously, this rain has been AMAZING for our garden too! Our tomatoes are bustin’ out all over — we’ve got actual sizeable green tomatoes already on two of the three big varieties we planted, too! (Our cherry tomatoes were started as seedlings much later, so they’re just catching up as plants.) What’s all this about your tomato plant being ugly, by the way? I love the look of tomato plants! And the smell! (That is, until they get rangy and eventually [if you're us] moldy… Heh.)
on June 22, 2009 at 9:35 am Schnookie

I did something I’ve wanted to do for a long time and something that I was scared to do!

Oh, and I have to say, I’m so proud of you, Pookie! I can’t wait to see how the pictures turned out!
on June 22, 2009 at 9:46 am Pookie

Amy, I’m sorry your family dinner was awful, but hooray for plants taking off! And yeah, tomato plants aren’t gorgeous or anything, but they smell better than any flower! They smell like summer and sunshine!
on June 22, 2009 at 9:59 am Amy

What’s all this about your tomato plant being ugly, by the way?

The cherry tomato plant is very, very scrawny, while the regular size tomato plant is going to be the plant that ate my fennel plant. It’s growing out so far with such dense foliage.

I hope those pictures of the motel sign come out, Pookie. It sounds like you had great material to work with.
on June 22, 2009 at 10:07 am Schnookie

Aw, you’ve got Mutt and Jeff tomato plants! :D I love when the scrawny, pathetic plants start yielding fruit. We had stunted pepper plants last year that still tried to grow peppers. They ended up being this little sticks with a handful of peppers bigger than the entire plants hanging off of them. I hope your cherry tomato does better than that!
on June 22, 2009 at 10:19 am Schnookie

Okay, I am having quite a day here today. I got up super-duper early and got into the office at 6:30 because I thought there were a ton of things I was going to have to prepare for a half-day meeting that started at 8:30. Only the people who would have needed handouts prepared never sent me their materials, so I’m assuming they printed everything themselves. So I got in at 6:30 for nothing. And now I’m starving, so I went to get something from the candy machine, and the peanut M&Ms I spent $1 on (for, like, six M&Ms total) got stuck in the machine so I had to pay for a second bag to make the first one come out. I’m tired and hungry and cranky and out $2 now. This is TERRIBLE! Heh.
on June 22, 2009 at 2:03 pm Meg

Schnookie, you’re day sounds terrible! I’m so sorry.

Also, I’m glad to hear the rain is doing wonders for your gardens, everyone. At least that’s one positive. Because I think it’s actually driving me slowly mad. Ick.
on June 22, 2009 at 2:06 pm Schnookie

Because I think it’s actually driving me slowly mad. Ick.

The garden being out of control is the only positive I take from this. And even that… well, I think our plants would really benefit at this point from some sun and warm weather. I am LOSING MY MIND from all this rain and gloom. I can’t remember which day it was last week when I woke up, saw it was pouring, and literally said aloud to my empty bedroom, “You have GOT to be kidding me.” If Mother Nature is trying to break me, she wins. I’m crying uncle. No mas! (It’s gotten so bad that it’s literally the only thing I’m capable of talking about anymore — complaining about this goddamn rain.)
on June 22, 2009 at 2:11 pm Mags

I’m tired and hungry and cranky and out $2 now. This is TERRIBLE! Heh.

Aww, I’m sorry!

I just spent a good 18 hours without internet. Our ISP updated their software and everything just went nuts. Longest 18 hours I have ever lived, and I’m SO GLAD it’s all working again!
on June 22, 2009 at 2:16 pm SueNJ97

Schnookie – The only thing I can tell you is, it’s the curse of Monday!

As for the weather, I am researching ways to convert my car into an ark. Seriously. Bleh.

Here is my formal announcement about the current weather:

Dear Pacific NorthWest and British Isles:

Apparently you were visiting the NorthEast and MidAtlantic Region and forgot to take your weather with you when you left. PLEASE come and retrieve your weather. We don’t mind your weather coming and visiting us, say, one day every two weeks or so, but, this extended visit is straining our sense of goodwill.

Thank You
on June 22, 2009 at 2:24 pm Schnookie

Mags, life without the interwebs is UNTHINKABLY awful! I’m so sorry, but I’m glad you managed to (barely) escape with your life!

Sue, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on June 22, 2009 at 2:25 pm Mags

Dear NE USA,

We’re most appreciative of your offer to have us take our weather back, no questions asked. But we’re going to have to decline. You see, we have become rather accustomed to this lovely bout of summery sunshine that has recently come to stay, and would like to take it on, on a more permanent basis.

However, given that you are so obviously disenchanted with your current meteorological situation, and that we are a kind and considerate people, we will make you an offer. If it came with the proper compensation, we could make ourselves a deal that would result in our more mutual satisfaction.

Perhaps you could simply stick the rain on France. It’d get those bitching farmers off our back.

Regards,
Most of NW Europe
on June 22, 2009 at 2:33 pm Meg

NW Europe,

You’re taking this weather back whether you like it or not.

South Bronx. 12:00 am.

Don’t make us come find you.

–NE U.S.
on June 22, 2009 at 2:40 pm Schnookie

Oooh, a strongly-worded letter! Tempers are flaring!
on June 22, 2009 at 2:45 pm mcguffers

You guys know that whole thing about staying away from controversial subjects like politics and religion and just sticking to safe subjects like the weather and sports? *looks outside at the absolutely beautiful clear blue sky* So, uh, how ’bout those Yankees?
on June 22, 2009 at 2:45 pm Mags

NE U.S.

We’ve had upwards of 400 years of trying to find ourselves. No dice so far. So by all means, give it a shot. Best of luck!

- NW Europe
on June 22, 2009 at 2:49 pm mcguffers

We’ve had upwards of 400 years of trying to find ourselves. No dice so far. So by all means, give it a shot. Best of luck!

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Now there’s some irony in “going backpacking through Europe to find myself.”
on June 22, 2009 at 2:50 pm Mags

Mcguffers, :^:::::::::::::::: How about those Yankees indeed. (I have absolutely no idea about them Yankees. The only thing I’ve watched on TV this week have been re-runs of game 7, and the College WS)
on June 22, 2009 at 2:50 pm Pookie

*looks outside at the absolutely beautiful clear blue sky* So, uh, how ’bout those Yankees?

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!! That’s it! mcguggers — you’re banned! Take your blue sky and get outta here!

I have never, ever, EVER been this upset over this much rain. I used to like the rain! I used to like that it meant I didn’t have to water the garden by hand! But seriously, at this point, I just want to drive home ONCE without having to crank my iPod up twice as much as usual just to hear it over the rain pouring on the roof of my car.
on June 22, 2009 at 2:51 pm SueNJ97

Actually, right after I wrote the post, the sun came out. There is lots of blue sky and white, puffy clouds. Let’s see how long this lasts!!!
on June 22, 2009 at 2:51 pm Amy

Oooh, a strongly-worded letter! Tempers are flaring!

It’s like the Jets and the Sharks are going to rumble. Where’s Officer Krupke when you need him?
on June 22, 2009 at 2:54 pm SueNJ97

Pookie, check the weather, because I’m in northern NJ and it has literally just miraculously cleared up. I’m not saying how long it will last.
on June 22, 2009 at 2:56 pm Schnookie

It was clear (ish) here in central Jersey this morning. Torrential rain at 6, then the clouds all scudded around enough that we had some patches of blue sky (albeit no sun), but it’s been low, gray, and dark again for the last couple of hours. I… CAN’T… TAKE IT… ANYMORE!!!!
on June 22, 2009 at 2:56 pm mcguffers

I made the weather clear up to keep myself from getting banned… again. Re-banned if you will.
on June 22, 2009 at 3:00 pm Schnookie

Oh, and now it’s pouring again.
on June 22, 2009 at 3:01 pm Schnookie

Thanks for nothing, mcguggs.
on June 22, 2009 at 3:01 pm Pookie

Thanks, mcguggers, that was nice of you!

(Actually, I have a secret — I’m pretty sure I’m the reason it’s been raining. Two weeks ago, I finally remembered, after many years of thinking it would be a good idea, to bring in sunscreen so I could put some on before driving home each day. The sun hasn’t shone since then. Sorry, guys.)
on June 22, 2009 at 3:04 pm mcguffers

Two weeks ago, I finally remembered, after many years of thinking it would be a good idea, to bring in sunscreen so I could put some on before driving home each day. The sun hasn’t shone since then.

AHAHAHAHAHA! I just found my umbrella ella ella Saturday night and Sunday and today were beautiful! The hockey gods have found a way to fuck with us in the off season. Say hello to their friends, the Weather gods.
on June 22, 2009 at 3:06 pm mcguffers

Oh, and now it’s pouring again.

Thanks for nothing, mcguggs.

It’s the thought, right? Right?
on June 22, 2009 at 3:16 pm Meg

It’s like the Jets and the Sharks are going to rumble. Where’s Officer Krupke when you need him?

Running frantically across town and over the bridge as we speak.

It’s not sunny here in New York but the sky is light-ish gray as opposed to dark gray so that’s a nice little change.
on June 22, 2009 at 3:21 pm SueNJ97

Well, I just checked the weather report. I need to enjoy this while I can. It’s supposed to rain tonight, rain tomorrow afternoon and rain all day Wednesday. It will only be partly cloudy on Thursday.

It’s not sunny here in New York but the sky is light-ish gray as opposed to dark gray so that’s a nice little change.

Meg, maybe my North NJ sunshine is headed your way for a little bit. It is a nice change. Before the rain hits again tonight!
on June 22, 2009 at 3:23 pm Schnookie

Apparently we’re predicting sun on Saturday. If I can just make it through the rest of this week, it might all be okay!
on June 22, 2009 at 4:47 pm mcguffers

I just had to go outside and water my plants! Ugh.

No sympathy? *giggling as I wander to my “banned” corner*
on June 22, 2009 at 5:22 pm Mags

I just had to go outside and water my plants! Ugh.

Poor mcguffers! Your life sounds terribly hard ;)

You know, I was glad the internet was back. Really, I danced a jig and everything. But now that I’ve reached the end of the internet I’m not so sure the dance was warranted. Come on ~~monkey~~ innernets, entertain us!
on June 22, 2009 at 6:22 pm mcguffers

Poor mcguffers! Your life sounds terribly hard ;)

It is! Thanks for understanding, Mags! I’m thinking about hiring a personal assistant. Or a BFF.
on June 22, 2009 at 8:16 pm Patty (in Dallas)

It’s a good thing I missed out on this convo. I might have put my foot in my mouth. :D