1-2-3 Hockey: 39 of 39
After months of talking about it, we finally tried our hands at homemade Devils logo bokeh, to celebrate the start of the hockey season tomorrow.
Instead of a crankypantsy season preview for you, Gentle Reader, we are presenting an exclusive peek behind the scenes of this year’s Devils. That’s right, it’s 38 Things You Don’t Know About The 2009-2010 Devils!
1. Zach Parise doesn’t actually know how to play cribbage. He just moves his peg on the board as many space as Travis did on his turn, and then adds five more.
2. Jacques Lemaire is waiting until he’s on his deathbed to admit that he did, in fact, intend to kill hockey. It will not, however, come as a surprise when he makes the confession.
3. Brian Rolston thinks he’s better than you at everything.
4. Brendan Shanahan is on the Devils roster again this year. [ETA: Or, um, not.]
5. Bryce Salvador is in the process of legally changing his name to The Iron Boar.
6. Rob Niedermayer isn’t sure who is scamming whom in this Rob Niedermayer/Lou Lamoriello relationship.
7. Rob Neidermayer isn’t sure who is who in the Rob Nediermaeyr/Lou Lamoriello relationship. In fact, he thinks in that relationship he might be Tycho Brahe.
8. Yann Danis is smizing.
9. Scott Stevens does not know what smizing is.
10. Egg Pelly has dead eye.
11. Larry Robinson cursed this franchise.
12. Last year we correctly predicted Brian Rolston’s goal total, but incorrectly predicted that Vincent Lecavalier would be captain of the Devils. We will not make that same mistake twice. This year’s new future captain of the New Jersey Devils is Duncan Keith.
13. Bobby Holik is planning on making a midseason return to the NHL this year. At the rate he’s going, Lou seems likely to sign him.
14. Patrik Elias’s groin will remain wonky until the Devils trainers allow Patty to get back on his foecal oyster diet.
15. Jamie Langerbrunner spent his summer having the crotch taken in on his crankypants.
16. Johnny Oduya’s off-season home is an exact replica of Dr. No’s volcanic lair.
17. If all goes according to plan, Nicklas Bergfors will complete his correspondence-school certification as a court reporter by the end of February.
18. Colin White thinks the “C” on Jamie Langenbrunner’s sweater stands for “choker”. When he told him as much, Langer tried to start a fight over it, but ultimately decided it wasn’t worth battling the truth.
19. Jacques Lemaire already has his costume picked out for the team’s mandatory Halloween Bag Skate Party. Ahoy, Captain Bligh!
20. Travis Zajac thinks he has a great idea for his costume for the team’s mandatory Halloween Bag Skate Party, but he’s not quite sure how dress as a sexy first-round playoff loss.
21. Zach Parise’s invite to the team’s mandatory Halloween Bag Skate Party will go missing thanks to a turtle butler being nervous about being mistaken for a bobbing apple again.
23. Scott Stevens wants you to think he’s taking notes while watching games. He isn’t.
24. The Devils were the NHL’s first choice to appear in this year’s Winter Classic. Making it happen, though, would have been a logistical nightmare, as many of the Devils players are severely allergic to playing in televised hockey games.
25. David Clarkson wants to petition the league to change his name to David Wraparound. If his application is denied, he’d like to change it to Wraparound Wraparound. If that doesn’t work, he’ll try out Wraparound Dos-Tres.
26. Mike Mottau wear black shoes with brown pants.
27. Andrew Peters wears brown shoes with black pants.
28. In the comfort of his own home, Paulie Martin wears brown shoes with no pants.
29. Martin Brodeur is not going to bother learning the name of his new head coach, although he thinks he may have met that guy somewhere before.
30. Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond thinks “Emrick” is a name like falling down the stairs.
31. Jay Pandolfo is nervous and excited about embarking on his new solo career.
32. Mario Tremblay can’t wait to run Marty Brodeur out of town. He keeps walking up to Marty and saying, “Finish this sentence: ‘This is my last game in…’”
33. Ilkka Pikkarainen is imaginary.
34. Andy Greene always calls dibs on the seat in the very back of the bus, in the hopes that it will earn him some currency with the cool kids. Zach Parise always calls dibs on the seat right next to the head coach. The cool kids try not to make eye contact with him when they file past him to hang out with Greene.
35. If there is a banana peel on the ground anywhere in the world, Dainius Zubrus will find it and slip on it.
36. Paulie Martin thinks it’s hilarious that the team is out of shape.
37. The team thinks it’s hilarious that Paulie Martin has no finish.
38. The Devils are going to surprise no one by not winning the Atlantic Division this year.
smizing! god I want to strangle that word!
Also, when will you post your Tranny Brides preview? or should I just check my email for that one?
In the comfort of his own home, Paulie Martin wears brown shoes with no pants.
This makes me want to go to his house and take his photo. I certainly hope he wears those old-man garters to hold his socks up.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: all of it.
35. If there is a banana peel on the ground anywhere in the world, Dainius Zubrus will find it and slip on it.
Then why on this green earth is Dainius Zubrus not standing in my kitchen right now? (I’m in the middle of baking banana bread, and dropped a banana peel, just to see if Zubbie would pop up)
I certainly hope he wears those old-man garters to hold his socks up.
There is no way he DOESN’T. Paulie is just that cool.
What a great post to start the season off with! You obviously are in shape for the season.
Zach Parise’s invite to the team’s mandatory Halloween Bag Skate Party will go missing thanks to a turtle butler being nervous about being mistaken for a bobbing apple again.
Maybe the turtle butler needs to visit YouTube and watch the Swedish Chef turtle soup sketch for ideas on how to protect himself when an errant Devil mistakes him for a bobbing apple.
Kristin, the Tranny Bride preview would go like this: “Mmmm Beaks and Farts. Ewwwww Pronger/Emery.” heh.
Carol, of course Paulie wears garters! Duh!
Mags, Zubie can spot a trap like that a mile away. He is a Devil afterall.
Amy, :^::::::::::::::
Happy first day of hockey everyone! I’m off to a full day of training. In which it willl be hard not to blurt out every ten minutes “hockey starts today!!!!!”
Oh man, does Paulie EVER wear old man garters! He even wears them when he doesn’t have socks on. Like, when he’s wearing sandals to all those Phish concerts.
I’m in the middle of baking banana bread, and dropped a banana peel, just to see if Zubbie would pop up
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Keep trying. He wants to get there, but he’s very, very slow. :P
And happy hockey everyone! WE MADE IT! WOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
He wants to get there, but he’s very, very slow. :P
You’re not kidding. Jeez.
Heh. Maybe he’s slipping on that banana peel in spirit?
Excellent preview thingy!
Thanks, Pam!
I’m not totally sure why, but:
4. Brendan Shanahan is on the Devils roster again this year.
Made me LOL
I believe when we were writing this, 4. Brendan Shanahan is on the Devils roster again this year was immediately followed by 5. Why God? WHY????
Maybe he’s slipping on that banana peel in spirit?
That must be it. I had thought I heard the echo of a thud, reverberating through space/time.
I had thought I heard the echo of a thud, reverberating through space/time.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I think that pretty well sums up the Zubrus Era.
Goddamn Zubrus…he frustrates me so much. He’s a big strong dude playing like he’s 5’5″ and 150 lbs.
And another thing about him, he’s a nosejob away from being totally foxy.
In fact, he thinks in that relationship he might be Tycho Brahe.
Rob thinks he’s Tycho Brahe in his relationship with Scott. That way he’s not the less talented younger brother. Unless Tycho had a more brilliant older brother, Wacho.
Wraparound Dos-Tres has kept me amused for over 78 minutes now. Well done!
Wraparound Dos-Tres has kept me amused for over 78 minutes now.
I’m not going to lie — that one keeps cracking me up too. :D
He’s a big strong dude playing like he’s 5′5″ and 150 lbs.
Sigh. Yeah. I kinda don’t mind him that much, really, because he’s essentially just a less creaky-kneed Brylin. Which, on the one hand, is a pretty good thing, but on the other hand, he’s about two feet taller and 100 pounds heavier than Sarge, so I guess he could construe it as an insult. (Although I think he’s way foxy, nose and all.)
Unless Tycho had a more brilliant older brother, Wacho.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Yea, I gotta say, Wraparound Dos-tres was pretty epic!
I gotta say, Wraparound Dos-tres was pretty epic!
It kind of reminds me of the guy who had Louis XVI on his jersey yesterday.
That Louis XVI sweater was crazy!
So. Awesome.
but he’s not quite sure how dress as a sexy first-round playoff loss.
I can’t stop laughing at this. Especially while picturing Staffy in his sexy oh so close to making the playoffs costume.
Especially while picturing Staffy in his sexy oh so close to making the playoffs costume.
HaHaHa. Please, oh please, let there be a fake mustache involved.
Uh, you are gonna have to ammend #4. Shanny just left the team according to Fire and Ice:
http://njmg.typepad.com/devilsblog/2009/10/brendan-shanahan-leaves-devils-will-not-be-on-the-team-this-season.html
I know Shanny leaving the Devils will please the Ookies to no end, but this has been a weird preseason, no? Patty’s scar tissue, White and Langer at each other, Danis mask going AWOL, Shanny leaving, Pikkarainen on IR with a week old flu. Just odd stuff.
WOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Hockey is here! That’s right mothereffers!
Good morning all! Looks like the day has finally arrived. I need to get to the damn store. We’re gonna need beer. Lots and lots of beer.
Uh, you are gonna have to ammend #4. Shanny just left the team according to Fire and Ice
Dude, THE HELL? This has been the freakin’ craziest preseason ever. I, um… well… I wasn’t optimistic about the season anyway, but this goofy-tastic preseason isn’t helping.
We’re gonna need beer. Lots and lots of beer.
Ooh, ooh, could you get some for me while you’re out?
Ooh, ooh, could you get some for me while you’re out?
Will do!
Oh! I almost forgot to tell you guys…check this out. If you own a Wii and haven’t bought Guitar Hero 5 yet…I went to Toys R Us yesterday, this week you can buy the GH5 bundle (w/guitar) and you get a free copy of GH World Tour (w/guitar). AND if you buy it by today you get a free copy of GH Van Halen via mail in. So $99 gets you 3 games and 2 guitars. Crazy.
I don’t know about other game systems, but I do know that the GH Van Halen deal is valid with any platform. The purchase-by date is today though. (and hey, I can’t stand Van Halen, but a free game is a free game.)
Um, now that #4 is even funnier. WTF?
I just saw Fire & Ice and Shanny left the Devils and I rushed right over here. That must mean I love you.
but Whoa. i didnt see that coming. (famous last words). yes to everyone that this is one weird off-pre-season.
I hope they’ve saved some wackiness for the season.
HaHaHa. Please, oh please, let there be a fake mustache involved.
And super tight 80′s shorts!
Huh, Shanny’s departure tops Pommers hastily-arranged, no-deportation wedding as the strangest thing I’ve read about today.
So do the Devils call up someone to replace him or is there just a blank space where he used to be?
andrew, that’s, like a lifetime supply of Guitar Hero! Wow!
I just saw Fire & Ice and Shanny left the Devils and I rushed right over here. That must mean I love you.
*Blushes* Thanks, Ken. :P
As for Shanahan, I’d kinda made my peace with him. I was fully prepared for him to score, like, 7 goals for us this year and going loooooong stretches at a time where you wonder, “Say, was Shanny scratched for this game and I just didn’t notice?” But now that he’s gone, I have no idea what to expect from this season. Who’s going to pick up the “Is [player X] still even on our active roster?” slack for him? I’m so excited to find out!
So do the Devils call up someone to replace him or is there just a blank space where he used to be?
Both
Especially while picturing Staffy in his sexy oh so close to making the playoffs costume.
HaHaHa. Please, oh please, let there be a fake mustache involved.
Somehow I missed these comments! :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
So do the Devils call up someone to replace him or is there just a blank space where he used to be?
Well, considering the production I’d penciled Shanny in for, I think they might have to call up a blank space to fill in for the blank space that’s leaving. :P
It took some time but my snub of Shanahan back in May at the NHL store in favor of talking to Daneyko finally made him realize he isn’t welcome on the Devils :D
This is awfully strange timing though, this close to the start of the season. I think it would be good for the team though, if young people actually started coming up and contributing like back in the era for which this blog was named…
Shanny’s departure tops Pommers hastily-arranged, no-deportation wedding as the strangest thing I’ve read about today.
Uh…what? Pommers got married to keep from being deported? Where did you see that, Amy?
that’s, like a lifetime supply of Guitar Hero! Wow!
It is! I figured I should share the wealth, for anyone who may need it. Or anyone who hasn’t already spent all of their money on CI.
All hail Matt Halischuk!
Pommers got married to keep from being deported? Where did you see that, Amy?
Pommers got married last December in order to avoid the girlfriend (now wife) from being deported, per Bucky’s column this morning. That wailing and sobbing you hear is from the countless teenyboppers and puckbunnies whose hopes and dreams of becoming Mrs. Pommer have now been crushed.
It took some time but my snub of Shanahan back in May at the NHL store in favor of talking to Daneyko finally made him realize he isn’t welcome on the Devils
We should all be thanking you, then! Or, when the kids aren’t even good enough to produce the extremely rare goal I was expecting from Shanny, we should all be blaming you. :P
Or, when the kids aren’t even good enough to produce the extremely rare goal I was expecting from Shanny, we should all be blaming you. :P
With great power comes great responsibility.
…per Bucky’s column this morning
Ah, that’s why I didn’t see it. I decided long ago that Bucky’s columns aren’t worth the migraines they induce. I’m glad to say that I’ve been Bucky-free for over a year!
Sounds like the puckbunnies are going to have to go back to Roy-Z. Those poor poor women.
know what i just realized? no one has ever seen Brendan Shanahan and Ilkka Pikkarainen in the same room together at the same time!
huh?! huh!?
if the power goes out and theres a odd green glow over Newark tonight and Shanahan is never seen again, you’ll know what happened. (insert creepy Vincent Price laugh here)
With great power comes great responsibility.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: So true.
Sounds like the puckbunnies are going to have to go back to Roy-Z. Those poor poor women.
HA! It’s not easy being a Sabres puckbunny anymore. Pickings have gotten really slim. (Congrats on being Bucky-free, andrew. That’s the kind of thing that can make life so much more worth living!)
no one has ever seen Brendan Shanahan and Ilkka Pikkarainen in the same room together at the same time!
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Well, as we established in our post, Ilkka Pikkarainen is imaginary. At least, he was, right up until Shanahan “disappeared”.
So, Shanny joins Larry Robinson in the strange departures from the Devils club (we don’t count Sutter…we all knew what was going on there).
Many more of these and they’ll have to have a secret handshake and a club holiday party.
WOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Hockey is here! That’s right mothereffers!
It’s true. And the First Round Rioters are going down. I’m just saying.
Sounds like the puckbunnies are going to have to go back to Roy-Z. Those poor poor women.
Yeah. My heart goes out to them. *eye roll* Mair and Connolly are there to comfort as well.
Well, as we established in our post, Ilkka Pikkarainen is imaginary. At least, he was, right up until Shanahan “disappeared”.
Thats exactly where i got this theory from.
but it makes perfect sense, and therefore must be completely true.
but it makes perfect sense, and therefore must be completely true.
And now it’s on the interwebs, meaning it’s an unassailable fact.
Many more of these and they’ll have to have a secret handshake and a club holiday party.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Don’t forget the weird way the team handled Scotty Stevens’s concussion in ’03-’04, the way he was gone, but he kinda wasn’t, and no one was allowed to talk about it, and it cast a strange pall over the entire season. I think that counts as a strange departure, too. They tried to do that to Whitey and Langer two years ago, didn’t they? And now they’re doing it to Patty! I’m now completely paranoid that the Devils are disappearing key team members! (Mike Danton, I don’t mean you.)
(Congrats on being Bucky-free, andrew. That’s the kind of thing that can make life so much more worth living!)
Well thank you, Schnookie! To be honest it wasn’t really that hard. There are a crap-ton of good Sabres blogs out there. Whenever I missed Bucky’s work I would just google “Briere and Drury”, then smack myself in the face with a hammer.
It’s true. And the First Round Rioters are going down. I’m just saying.
Look out! Meg’s coming out swinging! Trust me, Meg…the only thing the Kleptos are going to steal this week is a big fat ‘L’! (um, as in ‘loss’. Just making sure we’re clear here)
My heart goes out to them. *eye roll* Mair and Connolly are there to comfort as well.
Ha! Again, those poor women. (but seriously, Mair is godamn awesome. He’s been my mancrush for like 4 years now.)
And now it’s on the interwebs, meaning it’s an unassailable fact.
I may have to have that embroidered on a sampler.
Whenever I missed Bucky’s work I would just google “Briere and Drury”, then smack myself in the face with a hammer.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Again, those poor women.
Then it falls to Goose and Crunchy to pick up the slack.
Whenever I missed Bucky’s work I would just google “Briere and Drury”, then smack myself in the face with a hammer.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: That actually seems a lot less painful than reading Bucky’s columns.
I’m now completely paranoid that the Devils are disappearing key team members! (Mike Danton, I don’t mean you.)
It’s almost like someone is kidnapping them and holding them hostage somewhere large and secluded from the city. Like a farmhouse. And the kidnappers would probably have to make them clothes so it wouldn’t be suspicious that they were buying men’s clothes. And the kidnappers would probably have to grow produce so no one would notice the large quantities of food they were buying. And they probably would have to redo they’re bathrooms from the extra use of the players. So, we’d be looking for a farmhouse where the kidnappers could sew, grow veggies, and have recently redone the bathroom facilities. Hmph. Needle in a hay stack.
ahem, their bathrooms. Yay English major!!
So, we’d be looking for a farmhouse where the kidnappers could sew, grow veggies, and have recently redone the bathroom facilities. Hmph. Needle in a hay stack.
AHAHAHAHA! That’s some fine detective work there, Lou.
And now they’re doing it to Patty! I’m now completely paranoid that the Devils are disappearing key team members!
I think the plan to ‘disappear’ Patty is a leftover from the Sutter regime and Lou forgot to stop it. Really, he needs to keep better track of this stuff.
So, we’d be looking for a farmhouse where the kidnappers could sew, grow veggies, and have recently redone the bathroom facilities. Hmph. Needle in a hay stack.
Ummm… I’d be all “*Shifty eyes*” but dude, look at the list of the disappeared. Larry Robinson? Brendan Shanahan? A failed attempt at disappearing Colin White? No, we’d be a lot more obvious about it. (But thanks for pointing out what a PERFECT set-up we have here. *Begins formulating plans*)
I think the plan to ‘disappear’ Patty is a leftover from the Sutter regime and Lou forgot to stop it. Really, he needs to keep better track of this stuff.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I think Lou’s lost a step or three.
So, we’d be looking for a farmhouse where the kidnappers could sew, grow veggies, and have recently redone the bathroom facilities. Hmph. Needle in a hay stack.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: *gasp* ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Sounds like a job for the Pommerdoodle Detective Agency, no?
Really, he needs to keep better track of this stuff.
Yeah, pity he doesn’t have a turtle of affairs to manage his disappearances ledger.
So, we’d be looking for a farmhouse where the kidnappers could sew, grow veggies, and have recently redone the bathroom facilities. Hmph. Needle in a hay stack.
No, we’d be a lot more obvious about it.
But i think thats your plan, to lull them into a false sense of security until you can nab the players you wanted all along. allegedly, of course.
“First they came for the old players, and I did not speak out
Then they came for the old coaches, and I did not care
Then they came for the concussed, and I did not remember
Then they came for the injured, and I did not notice
Then they came for the groin injured, and I did not cringe…”
That’s some fine detective work there, Lou.
It’s those brain teasers. They really work!
Then it falls to Goose and Crunchy to pick up the slack.
I dunno. What with the paparazzi following Crunchy and his “movie star” girlfriend, he might want to behave!
“First they came for the old players, and I did not speak out
Then they came for the old coaches, and I did not care
Then they came for the concussed, and I did not remember
Then they came for the injured, and I did not notice
Then they came for the groin injured, and I did not cringe…”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::*gasp*:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
“First they came for the old players, and I did not speak out
Then they came for the old coaches, and I did not care
Then they came for the concussed, and I did not remember
Then they came for the injured, and I did not notice
Then they came for the groin injured, and I did not cringe…”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: *gasp* :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::*splutter*:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: *cough* :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: *izded*
Then they came for the concussed, and I did not remember
So, Eric Lindros hasn’t really been conspiring against the former Director of the NHLPA, he’s been washing vegetables in South Jersey?
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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Good Gollie!
Y’all have been on a roll this morning! Good thing my bosses aren’t here today. They would be wondering what was wrong with me.
Andrew! If you see a good deal on Rock Band for Wii, please let me know! I want one for Christmas.
Speaking of Christmas! It’s the first day of Hockey Season!!! Because, you know, I thought y’all might have forgotten.
I just ordered Center Ice!!!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
he’s been washing vegetables in South Jersey?
Well, I would assume so. I mean, he’s probably showering regularly.
*badumbumching*
Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week. Be sure to try the fish.
If you see a good deal on Rock Band for Wii, please let me know! I want one for Christmas.
Will do, Myra!
I just ordered Center Ice!!!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Yeah! Get some! WOOO!!!!
Speaking of Christmas! It’s the first day of Hockey Season!!! Because, you know, I thought y’all might have forgotten.
Wait, WHAT??? Why didn’t anyone tell me?!? :P
And WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! for the Center Ice! Let the good times roll!
Well, I would assume so. I mean, he’s probably showering regularly.
ZING!
So how did Brodeur finally escape from you? I am picturing him holding a kitten hostage as he climbs over a barbed wire fence at your “pastoral retreat.”
And another :^::::::::::::::: to KenF, I always loved that quote.
So how did Brodeur finally escape from you? I am picturing him holding a kitten hostage as he climbs over a barbed wire fence at your “pastoral retreat.”
Nothing so dramatic. Cost too much to feed him.
So how did Brodeur finally escape from you? I am picturing him holding a kitten hostage as he climbs over a barbed wire fence at your “pastoral retreat.”
Nothing so dramatic. Cost too much to feed him.
HAHAHAHAHAHA! Yeah, we ran out of dormice and just couldn’t deal with the whining and tantrums. We finally just “accidentally” left the front door open, and after a few weeks, he finally “escaped”.
Then they came for the injured, and I did not notice
Then they came for the groin injured, and I did not cringe…”
Someone HAS to embroider that on a pillow.
Alright, I’m off to celebrate the first night of hockey/last night with incontinent 80 year old dog by watching the Leafs/Habs game and counting how many times Pierre mentions Komisarek used to be a Hab, predicts Gomez is going to have a 50+ goal season, laments about Carey Price’s rough season, discusses how Burke signed a “tougher” team, discusses how Gainey dismantled his team, and poops on the floor. (er, wait. The “poops on the floor part” was for the dog. Well, maybe both.)
So how did Brodeur finally escape from you? I am picturing him holding a kitten hostage as he climbs over a barbed wire fence at your “pastoral retreat.”
and he’s holding a summer squash in his pocket that he insists is a gun.
Nothing so dramatic. Cost too much to feed him.
Most people simply don’t realize it, but honeyed doormice are fucking expensive.
Oh man, also, I was at Costco yesterday and I parked next to a Lexus with a license plate that said “EL PANDO”. I have no idea what to make of it, but it was kinda funny.
(er, wait. The “poops on the floor part” was for the dog. Well, maybe both.)
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Have a great time, mcguggs!
Most people simply don’t realize it, but honeyed doormice are fucking expensive.
Dude, for reals! And believe you me, Marty can tell the difference between the real deal and imitation dormice. Don’t even try to fool him.
I parked next to a Lexus with a license plate that said “EL PANDO”.
Yeah, I was at your Costco yesterday. It was a long way to go, but I was hoping maybe they had a deal on bulk dormice.
We finally just “accidentally” left the front door open, and after a few weeks, he finally “escaped”.
He’s not too swift if it took him a couple weeks to realize the front door was open.
And according to Eklund (I know, I know), the Devils are potentially looking at a major acquisition of a top center via trade.
It was a long way to go, but I was hoping maybe they had a deal on bulk dormice.
Ha! Nice.
And according to Eklund (I know, I know), the Devils are potentially looking at a major acquisition of a top center via trade.
So you’re saying I shouldn’t be expecting a major acquisition of a top center via a trade, then, eh?
Oh my god. It’s only 10:40 in the morning. I am not going to make it. This is total bullshit.
Eight more hours?!?! GAH!!!
Oh my god. It’s only 10:40 in the morning. I am not going to make it. This is total bullshit.
Oh man, I am so sorry. I’m all turned inside out, though, because my boss called me a little while ago from India. I knew he was flying home on Friday, but he said to me, “I’m on my way to the airport now.” So as I scrambled to register that it was tomorrow already in Bangalore, he said to me, “I suppose you’re heading home for the weekend shortly.” I’m like, “Wait, what the fuck day is it?”
really, what the fuck day is it?
i fluctuate between feeling like its wednesday and friday. I never feel like its tuesday because tuesdays feels like tofu tastes.
I never feel like its tuesday because tuesdays feels like tofu tastes.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I can’t even deal with Tuesdays anymore. Pookie has worked the late shift on Wednesdays for the last, like, four years, and just within the last few weeks switched permanently to Monday nights. Since we hold up dinner until Pookie gets home at 10 on her late nights, you can see how this would be a drastic change for all of us at stately IPB Manor. And now I wake up every Tuesday morning thinking it’s Thursday, and spend Wednesday thinking it’s Friday, and by Thursday I just have no idea where I am or what I’m doing.
I think the Canucks are going to KILL the Flames tonight! Can. Hardly. Wait.
Also, totes off topic – Wesley Snipes eliminated last night off ANTM. Who has time to mourn, though? It’s really hockey season tonight. AND, it’s Friday Eve!
Yahoo!
Best. Day. Ever.
Since we hold up dinner until Pookie gets home at 10 on her late nights, you can see how this would be a drastic change for all of us at stately IPB Manor.
I think it’s so nice that you guys wait and eat together. My family would be like, “Well that’s why microwaves were invented. Enjoy!”
I don’t even know who’s playing tonight! All I know is that it’s HOCKEY! (And, it seems, that the Canucks are going to KILL the Flames. I can live with that! :D)
Who has time to mourn, though?
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Yeah, it’s a tough time, but I’ll try to muddle through. Pookie has pointed out that Kara (Cara?) looks like Eric Staal, though, so if we’re looking for another male celebrity to cheer for on ANTM, she might be the one. Of course, I think she’s going to be the next one to go — it’s never a good thing when Tyra accuses a girl (or, in Kara’s case, “girl”) of relying on her DNA. Heh.
I think it’s so nice that you guys wait and eat together. My family would be like, “Well that’s why microwaves were invented. Enjoy!”
We used to do that, but it’s just so depressing to watch poor Pookie try to figure out what she’s going to eat when she gets home at 10. Boomer likes to joke that she and Pookie are the baby birds who sit there peeping up at the sky, waiting for me to bring them food. So I’d be a very bad baby bird caretaker if I forced Pookie to fend for herself once a week! :P
Pookie has pointed out that Kara (Cara?) looks like Eric Staal, though
Heh. I see a very rough Julia Roberts.
I think the Sabres Tyler Myers looks like he could be a long lost Staal brother, though.
Hi IPB. Long time, no write, but with all that’s going on in hell today, I needed a sanctuary to come to. Shanny and Lou see no love left in the marriage, but Lou’s hitman gets the operating instructions wrong and puts the whack on Jeff Frazee?
Oduya want some birthday cake?
redank, what’s up! Great to hear from you again!
Lou’s hitman gets the operating instructions wrong and puts the whack on Jeff Frazee?
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Lou can’t do anything right this year!
As for Kara looking like Eric Staal, it’s really only when she’s looking straight at the camera. I think her “dead eyes” are going to do in her in. Poor Hooters.
Kara (Cara?) looks like Eric Staal
At first I thought I read “Eric Stoltz” – you mean when he was Rocky in that story about the guy with the big head? You know, Mask? Heh.
ANYWAY, then I remembered this is a hockey blog, so, full disclosure – I had to google Eric Staal to see what he looks like exactly. She has the same nose for sure.
AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Carol, I think Kara looks more like Eric Stoltz in “Mask” than Eric “Hooters” Staal. Both both are apt comparisons. Heh.
Ahhhh, let the Caps-hating begin again!
Ahhhh, let the Caps-hating begin again!
WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I love how the intro was “This game is all about STARS! Oh, er, I mean, hockey is a team game. But… OVIE is a STAR!!!”
Ahhhh, let the Caps-hating begin again!
Tonight I’ll just have a big glass of Leafs hating! WOOOOOOOOOOO! I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey I’m watching hockey !
So are you excited to be watching hockey, Grrrreg? We just agreed here at stately IPB Manor that our cable has paid for itself — without it, we wouldn’t be able to be watching Looch right now!
I’m watching Center Ice! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
I just saw my first ever Tim Horton’s commercial!!!
So are you excited to be watching hockey, Grrrreg?
Yes I am!
Burke was just watching Orr and Laraque fighting with his binoculars. What a jerk.
Happy Center Ice, Myra! Isn’t it the greatest thing ever?!?
I just saw my first ever Tim Horton’s commercial!!!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! So exciting!!! Congratulations!
Burke was just watching Orr and Laraque fighting with his binoculars. What a jerk.
I’m surprised he didn’t run down to the ice and take all the credit for the sheer awesomeness of it all.
You guys, I love hockey SO MUCH. Just wanted to share that. :D
EEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
The little musical jingle for CBC is “Oh, Canada!”
Sorry, y’all are going to just have to bear with me tonight!
Don’t apologize, Myra — it took me years before I could act all calm with Canadian broadcasts. In fact, sometimes I still get all giddy. Heh. (Not to be all patronizing to any Canadians who might be reading this right now… :P)
“OVIE is a STAR!!!”
Huh. More like a toothless black hole that sucks the true spirit of hockey out of the game. But I digress.
And while I would love to see Zdeno Chara clothesline Ovechkin, I have Direct TV, which is currently feuding with Versus, and am thus unable to listen to Joe Beninati wax poetic on the greatness that is ‘Ovie.’ Instead I’m watching Brian Gionta score his first goal as a Canadien on Center Ice. Poo.
Dave just yelled,”Alright! He’s (Gio) on track for 82 goals this year!”
Gio is a Broken Noser.
WOOOOOOOOOOO! a PP goal, during a 4 minutes penalty for Komisarek! Ahahahahahahahahahahah!
Am I the only one who thinks ‘Komi’ isn’t as great as he’s made out to be?
Did I miss the discussion about Zdeno Chara going to appear tastefully nude in ESPN? Because I know that had to be a good conversation.
Aaaannnndddd, Ponikarovsky scores, with an assist from Habs $2 million dollar defenseman Hal Gill, to tie the game.
Damn. About Komi, it’s tough for me to defend him now that he’s a leaf, but I wouldn’t have minded at all to have him back with the habs. He did have a lousy season last year (just like all his teammates), but he was really good the season before (just like most of his teammates too…)
Dave just yelled,”Alright! He’s (Gio) on track for 82 goals this year!”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 82 is a lot like 20. Give or take 62.
Dave just yelled,”Alright! He’s (Gio) on track for 82 goals this year!”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 82 is a lot like 20. Give or take 62.
Yeah, I don’t know about 82, but I think he’ll score a little more than 20. He’s been pretty impressive in the preseason… I was a little suspicious because of what you said about him, but so far so good.
but I think he’ll score a little more than 20.
He’s had a whole lot of seasons where he’s scored between 20 and 25, and one season where he scored 48. Make what you will of that. :P
Oh I know! I’m not exactly looking at 48 either. But something around 30 would be good.
I just saw my first ever Tim Horton’s commercial!!!
Yay!
How long until the stick size jokes start regarding Chara’s posing in ESPN Magazine?
I’m not exactly looking at 48 either. But something around 30 would be good.
If I had a nickel for every season I said that about him… :P
I’m getting my first look at Don Cherry (except for YouTube). I don’t understand anything that he is talking about.
How long until the stick size jokes start regarding Chara’s posing in ESPN Magazine?
I know I’ve had one conversation like that already. :)
I’m getting my first look at Don Cherry (except for YouTube). I don’t understand anything that he is talking about.
I have NEVER understood why Don Cherry is so talked about. I mean, beside being a xenophobic dipshit with a stupid schtick, he’s just nonsensical. He is as coherent an intermission speaker as Mike Milbury. Basically, I think Don Cherry is the most overrated thing in all of hockey. It’s not even like he’s entertainingly annoying.
Wait, is Zdeno Chara really posing naked in ESPN the magazine? And if so, why?
Basically, I think Don Cherry is the most overrated thing in all of hockey. It’s not even like he’s entertainingly annoying.
The fact that he can’t go 20 seconds without interrupting himself makes it exhausting to try to pay attention.
Part of the fun of watching Don Cherry is watching various expressions of WTF cross Ron MacLean’s face. I do also like his tributes to the troops, but I’m a sentimental softie that way.
I have to say, this Bruins team looks like one that’s coached by Claude Julien. Heh.
Dudes, we ordered our favorite super-fancy fine chocolates to celebrate Opening Night, and you know what troubling thing we discovered in it? They’ve added a banana ganache to the mix. BANANA! WITH NO WARNING! What is UO with that?
Banana? Ew.
We missed Savard’s intermission interview. I’m so sad. Um. Maybe not. :P
Myra, Savard didn’t look into the camera and say, all sexy-like, “I have one thing to say… pot roast“, so you didn’t miss anything! :P
Savard didn’t look into the camera and say, all sexy-like, “I have one thing to say… pot roast“, so you didn’t miss anything!
He was thinking it, though.
Yeah, he’s jealous because there is no pot roast waiting for him after the game like there is for Ovie, Backstrom and Semin.
Bleh. I know they are Pot Roasters but I sure feel dirty saying that about them.
In the meantime, Komisarek is racking up the PIM’s for the Pot Roasters. Wahoo! Go Komi!
Basically, I think Don Cherry is the most overrated thing in all of hockey. It’s not even like he’s entertainingly annoying.
More like smash-your-television annoying.
They’ve added a banana ganache to the mix. BANANA! WITH NO WARNING!
Banana ganache is just a bizarre idea to begin with.
Banana ganache is just a bizarre idea to begin with.
*tiny voice* It wasn’t that bad. I mean, the chocolate itself was so insanely good I thought for a split second “maybe banana isn’t that bad?”, but then I came back to my senses.
OK, this Caps-Bruins game blows.
Bleh. I know they are Pot Roasters but I sure feel dirty saying that about them.
That’s DISGUSTING, Myra! For shame! :P
More like smash-your-television annoying.
Dude, seriously. I just don’t get it.
And yeah, banana ganache is not something I would think of. It’s from La Maison du Chocolat, so there are plenty of unexpected flavors, though. Like the cinnamon ganache and the fennel one. They’re all really good. Except the banana. (Although there was an agreement that if a coworker gave us a box of these banana ganaches at Christmastime, and it was sitting at our desk at work, and there was nothing else to eat, we’d eat all of them. I mean, they were banana, but they were at least artfully done, with REALLY good chocolate. :D)
Alright, it’s the 2nd intermission, I’m heading to my bed… I’m too tired to see the rest. Good night everyone!
*tiny voice* It wasn’t that bad.
What was that, Pookie? I couldn’t heaaaaaaaaaaaar you…
In all seriousness, I’m actually a big fan of bananas. I love them and eat them all the time. And I think they go great with chocolate. And also with peanutbutter. It’s banana flavored things I’m iffy on.
G’night Grrrreg!
I’m actually a big fan of bananas. I love them and eat them all the time. And I think they go great with chocolate.
Well, if I’d known that, and if I’d known ahead of time that that particular chocolate was banana-infused (the tasting guide didn’t mention that one — it was our mystery chocolate), I would have sent it to you! :D
Like the cinnamon ganache
That sounds fantastic.
The La Maison du Chocolat stuff is sooo pretty and delicious looking. I’ve been in their Rockefeller Center store a few times just to torture myself.
What was that, Pookie? I couldn’t heaaaaaaaaaaaar you…
I said, “Banana is the most disgusting flavor on Earth if it’s not a delicate infusion in delicious, delicious dark chocolate.” :D
I took a chocolate-making “Lunch and Learn” class at work once (back before they cut all the budgets for that stuff), and the chef teaching it recommended them. We sent an assortment to our grandmother not long after that, because she was a huuuuge chocoholic. She sniffed unhappily after trying them that she much preferred a Hershey bar, so for quite a while, I just assumed that La Maison du Chocolat was all flash and no substance. Then one day we decided to splurge on a box of them to celebrate the start of the hockey season (a tradition that has taken hold here), and have been laughing at our grandmother’s unsophisticated chocolate palette ever since. They are even better than they look. SO. GOOD.
OMG, the Flames are wearing clown suits! Ack.
OMG, the Flames are wearing clown suits! Ack.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: They’re like, “Yes. Flames uniforms.”
Watching the Leafs suck! Yah! It’s hockey season alright! So, now I have to pay attention to the Eastern League. I’m on it.
Buzzer beater? Heh. My new favourite phrase only AFTER Beard of Bees.
Don’t work TOO hard paying attention to the EC. Goodness knows none of us Amazing/SuperLeaguers drafting out of the west pay any attention to y’all in the other conference. It’s best just to play blind. :P
I think they should change the term “buzzer beater” to “beard of bees”. Last-second goals would be so much more exciting if they were called beards of bees. Or beard of beeses.
Jar-o-may is a fire clown?!
Or beard of beeses. YAY!
Fire clown? Damn it! The Canucks are getting bumped right now by the stinkin’ Maple Leafs! ARGH! Come on guys! Somebody score!
Oooh, any guesses how long it’s going to take the Avs to retire 19? I’m calling no less than 90 minutes. :P
“I’m going to bake you into a lemon bar and eat you.” Hockey chic in commercial to Ryan Kesler.
I think that is my new favorite phrase next to, “I want to put him in my pocket and take him home with me.”
And The Fire Clowns = Calgary! Perfect!
Waiting to see Shirokov – apparently he kicks all kinds of a$$.
Darcy Tucker is still alive? Surely he died in Vegas.
Waiting to see Shirokov – apparently he kicks all kinds of a$$.
I love how considerate you are to our delicate ears, going with “a$$” instead of… well, I won’t type it. One of our cats might be reading, and I don’t want them exposed to that kind of language.
Gulp. What’s happening?
I’m watching the Sharks/Avs game (and the Too Oranges just notched their first assist. Way to go, Pavelski!) — what’s going on in the Canucks game?
One of our cats might be reading, and I don’t want them exposed to that kind of language
Heehee. Lady boners.
Sorry, kitties.
Oh. Nothing much. Just Luongo let the first shot on goal in. Yeesh. Also, we have new announcers and I don’t recognize them or like them.
I think I may have a temper tantrum! This is not how it’s supposed to be.
And The Flames just scored again. FAHK.
Heehee. Lady boners.
Sorry, kitties.
The kitties of stately IPB Manor: “Well I never!”
Also, we have new announcers and I don’t recognize them or like them.
I think I may have a temper tantrum! This is not how it’s supposed to be.
Man, I would be having a tantrum too! New announcers? That BLOWS! And to be losing right off the bat? That blows even worse! BOOOOOO!
Seriously, my tv doesn’t know what to do with those orange/red clown suits. It can’t seem handle the contrast. They sorta look like they are glowing.
OMG, the Fire Clowns just scored again…
OMG. This is NOT happening. They are going to have to pull Luongo?
The hell????
OMG, the Fire Clowns just scored again…
Wow! Er… Is Luongo usually a slow starter?
Er… Is Luongo usually a slow starter?
Or has the new contract made him lazy? :P
Is Luongo usually a slow starter?
I’m not sure. I’m in hysterics. I can’t remember last season. Just the end.
Oh. No.
Wait, I feel better. They just mentioned Battle of the Blades. There. I’m calming down now.
3 goals on 7 shots.
12 more years!!!! Your captain!! WOOOOOOOO!! Go Canucks!!
I’m in hysterics. I can’t remember last season. Just the end.
It’s gonna be fine! Even if the Canucks don’t pull this one out tonight, they can still go 81-1! They’re gonna be fine! (And don’t forget Battle of the Blades. That’s just dying to cheer you up.)
3 goals on 7 shots.
12 more years!!!! Your captain!! WOOOOOOOO!! Go Canucks!!
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: This is why no team should ever sign a guy to more than a one-year deal. If everyone was in a contract year all the time, just think how great they’d be! And if no one was ever in that “I just signed a huge deal” year, it’d be even more great! :P
Mike just got up and left the game. It’s that bad.
No more 12 year contracts. Ever.
Oooh, that’s terrible, Carol. How’s Oscar holding up?
Lucky for him, he got Mike’s spot when Mike got up and left. So it’s worked out really well for Oscar!
Is Oscar sabotaging Luongo?
Is Oscar sabotaging Luongo?
Totally. He really wanted that spot on the couch.
Totally. He really wanted that spot on the couch.
That might be a bit too steep a price to pay, even for the couch. You might have to talk with Oscar about his priorities, Carol.
And on that note, I’m planning to get up super early tomorrow to walk to work, so I’m turning in for the night. G’night!
Nighty Night Pookie! Happy walking tomorrow.
Oh. I have a SuperLeague question – Uh, Brendan Shanahan was on the Beard of Bees. So, what? He’s just gone now? Retired?
Why, I never! I guess I’m short a Left Wing. Poop.
Good morning, everyone!
I’m sorry you have to find a new LW, Carol, but I think you’re probably way better off in the long run not to have Shanny. Heh.
And here’s my story for the day: I got up bright and early, had a lovely brisk walk to work, and was all excited to settle in at my empty office (both bosses are offsite today) for a nice cup of tea and my breakfast. For breakfast today was leftover Cuban-style black beans and yellow rice, leftovers from a PHENOMENAL dinner I’d made earlier this week. It was even made with super-fancy rare heirloom black runner beans, and was just out of this world. It was the reason I was able to get out of bed this morning. I’d been looking forward to this breakfast for DAYS. So what do I do? When I’m taking it out of the microwave — whoops! The tupperware seems to leap out of my hand by its own free will, flip off its lid, and plummet to the floor. Face down. Beans and rice EVERYWHERE but in the tupperware. So now I’m starving and feel like a kid whose ice cream just fell off the cone. *Sniff, sniff* *Tries not to cry* I’m going back to bed now.
Schnookie, I’m sorry to hear about your breakfast tragedy. Times like this you really wish you had a turtle butler to run out and get you a replacement breakfast.
What the heck happened with Luongo last night? And Tim Thomas was a sieve as well. Maybe it’s a pre-Olympic curse? Which means that Crunchy and Marty are well and truly effed.
Times like this you really wish you had a turtle butler to run out and get you a replacement breakfast.
Dude, big style. Or better yet, a turtle butler to get the tupperware out of the microwave so I’m not responsible for tossing it all onto the floor.
What the heck happened with Luongo last night? And Tim Thomas was a sieve as well. Maybe it’s a pre-Olympic curse?
Nah, I wouldn’t worry. I think it’s the post-big-contract-signing curse. Basically, Luongo and Thomas are ruined forever, but Crunchy and Marty should be fine. :P
You know what would be really good right now? Beans and rice. :(
So now I’m starving and feel like a kid whose ice cream just fell off the cone.
More like a kid whose rare heirloom best ice cream ever fell off the cone. I am so, so, so, so, SO sorry!
I think it’s the post-big-contract-signing curse.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Yup!
Good morning, everyone! I have to go to staphylococcus meetings this morning. Yuck.
More like a kid whose rare heirloom best ice cream ever fell off the cone.
Yeah, that’s more apt. Those beans! SO GOOD! So not available from Rancho Gordo anymore! :(
Ew! A staphylococcus meeting? I’m so sorry! That’s almost as bad as having your rare heirloom best ice cream ever fall off the cone.
I’m so sorry, Schnookie. I would be so upset if I dropped my breakfast (and all I have today is infinitely-less-exciting instant oatmeal).
Yeah, I would have been pretty devastated if I’d dropped instant oatmeal too. It just escalated from there. (It was suggested to me that I just make a bagel run so I can have something to eat, a solution that sounded great until I remembered that the reason I needed breakfast in the first place was because I walked to work today. Sigh. My life is so difficult. :P)
What the heck happened with Luongo last night? And Tim Thomas was a sieve as well. Maybe it’s a pre-Olympic curse? Which means that Crunchy and Marty are well and truly effed.
It’s one of 3 things:
1. It could be the pre-Olympic curse, as you noted.
2. It could be the revenge of Marty as he gears up for another Vezina, another first-round exit, but also racks up those nominations for comeback player of the year.
3. It’s all an evil sign that the Vezina will go to…Lundqvist.
3. It’s all an evil sign that the Vezina will go to…Lundqvist.
Noooooo!
I was watching HNiC last night and Kevin Weekes wasn’t half bad in the booth.
Mmmmm… Kevin Weekes. I was really hoping he’d find a way to ouster Chico from the Devils broadcasts.
Hockey’s back! WEEEEEEE!
I am happy for Gio, I really am, and I wonder if the Avs will retire Sakic’s jersey every night even on the road.
Versus was in so rare form for SJ@COL BTW (OMG LOL). Blake took a four minute highsticking minor with mere seconds to go in the first. Doc and Eddie both missed the call, and Versus did not give a replay of the foul. In the second Sakic was in the booth, and for someone who never talks, they couldn’t shut him up. He talked over an Avs goal, and completely into a commercial break. Ah, mid-season form Vs.
Mmmmm… Kevin Weekes. I was really hoping he’d find a way to ouster Chico from the Devils broadcasts.
Same here. It would be a vast improvement in all areas but one…I can’t see him doing “Kevin Eats!”.
However, I could live without that to get everything else.
I can’t see him doing “Kevin Eats!”.
However, I could live without that to get everything else.
Yeah, that’s a sacrifice I think I’m willing to make. :D
I wonder if the Avs will retire Sakic’s jersey every night even on the road.
They would but there’s a limit to the number of times Joe will agree to appear (he’s not Ray Bourque, after all). They plan to play the video of the retirement ceremony before all games, home and away.
In the second Sakic was in the booth, and for someone who never talks, they couldn’t shut him up.
Maybe he learned how to speak while he was injured.
Speaking of injuries, according to RDS, Markov could be out for 3 to 4 months. If this is true, the habs are screwed. He’s easily the best player of the team. Not only will we miss him, but now Hal Gill will get more ice time…
Is it october 2010 yet?
I can’t see him doing “Kevin Eats!”.
bwahahahaha.
they could have guests doing Chico Eats! maybe pick a random fan to eat some overpriced concession food while wearing Chico’s dead cat wig.
That was an interesting start to the season. Are the Habs really going to depend on Price to make 46 saves a night? Or with Markov out is he going to have to up it to 58? And i know Komi talks about how much he loves playing high pressure games, but he gets all excited and loses a hockey game. We get it. You’re a Leaf, not a Hab anymore. And HNiC, stop calling Gomez-Camalleri-Gionta Montreal’s “big line” cause it just sounds like your making fun of them for being short. Lapierre, stop sneering so much. You’re kind of a douche, and you’re only exaggerating it. Gorges… carry on. You rawk.
Hockey sucks.
Hockey sucks.
I agree and the Devils haven’t even played a game yet! :D
Eesh, it sounds like Markov got Gaustad’ed. But Goose returned from his torn tendon faster than they thought he would, so maybe Markov will as well (and Goose’s was something like an 80% tear).
maybe pick a random fan to eat some overpriced concession food while wearing Chico’s dead cat wig.
That would be SUCH a good idea! It would get me to go to more games, in the hopes that I’d get selected!
And I’m so sorry, Habs fans. There’s still plenty of time, though! I mean, all kinds of changes could be made! There’s, like, the ENTIRE SEASON to look forward to! Tons and tons and tons of games with Hal Gill as the top d-man… :P
Hockey sucks.
Been there, done that. Got the stitches to prove it.
Tons and tons and tons of games with Hal Gill as the top d-man… :P
Don’t let my mother hear you say that, she’s a big fan of Gill’s.
Eesh, it sounds like Markov got Gaustad’ed.
By his own goalie no less. (and I’m in no way blaming Price) I hate any injury that involves tearing. I get the heebie jeebies just thinking about it.
Been there, done that. Got the stitches to prove it.
:^:::::::::::::: That should be on a t-shirt.
That should be on a t-shirt.
You mean it isn’t?!
So how about the game that Craig Anderson played last night for the Avs? You would think that a player so cool he gets fantasy teams named after him would at least get to play but no, some idiot coach benched him since the Sharks are obviously so great!
I’m pretty sure this is all Pookie’s fault somehow…
I’m pretty sure this is all Pookie’s fault somehow…
Wait, you have the mighty Craig Anderson and you benched him?!?!? That’s it! Andrew, tell Mike he’s lost his Craig Anderson privileges!
I have to go to staphylococcus meetings this morning. Yuck.
Friday staphylococcus meeting? Oh man. That is BRUTAL! #ohmygodIhopeyoubroughtadoodlepadwithyou
OK, this Pens broadcast is totally taking me back… Banner raisings are the best!
Scratch that, we’re getting blacked out of the Pens feed. Oddly enough, MSG isn’t showing the ceremony in as much detail. Heh heh heh.
When they first showed the Stanley Cup, I thought it was snowing! It was just the flash bulbs going off. :D
I haven’t caught up or anything — I was out of town — but I do want to say that I LOVE that yellow countertop, Pookie! It’s so pretty!
Thanks, Patty! The contractor told me today she thought the bathroom looks like something out of a magazine!
Dan Bylsma just said, “Oh-nine, oh-ten,” in reference to this season! AARGH!
The contractor told me today she thought the bathroom looks like something out of a magazine!
Cool!
The only Center Ice game I’m getting on this “free preview” is the Trannies and Hurricanes. I can, however, see umpteen bajillion baseball games.
Are you enjoying the Pens on your new NHL Network, then, Amy? (We’re watching Trannies/Canes, but we’re 20 minutes behind. Heh.)
Patty, in “Make It Or Break It”, they CONSTANTLY referred to the “oh-twelve” Olympics. It cracked me up every time.
Dan Bylsma just said, “Oh-nine, oh-ten,” in reference to this season!
I’m not gonna lie. It took me a minute to realize what was wrong there. Shut up! It’s been a rough two weeks!
Nothing like the Penguins and Rangers to get me excited for hockey! Er, what word best means the opposite of excited for?
I haven’t caught the Pens game yet. I’m watching Toddlers and Tiaras off the DVR and I can’t figure out whether the mother who spent $1200 to win $600 or the girl named after an auto parts store chain is bothering me more.
I can’t figure out whether the mother who spent $1200 to win $600 or the girl named after an auto parts store chain is bothering me more.
Wow. That’s like choosing which you hate more between the Rangers and Pens. (Just kidding. That one’s easy. Rangers. Rangers is the correct answer. :P)
When I was a kid, my mom once asked me if I’d ever want to enter beauty pageants so I could dress up and act like Barbie. I gave her a horrified look and said, “No! That sounds stupid! Can we have pizza for dinner?” Every time I see that show, I just want to go back in time and give seven-year-old mcguggs a big hug. And order pizza.
I’m not gonna lie. It took me a minute to realize what was wrong there. Shut up! It’s been a rough two weeks!
Sorry about your rough weeks!
The oh-ten thing has been looming for a couple of years for me. I feel like I should be a tireless campaigner until everybody says “nine-ten.” :D
Sorry about your rough weeks!
It’s okay, Patty. It’s still no excuse for me being a dumbass. :D
The Rangers announcers like to point out the 4:20 mark of the period. Figures. Gilroy worshipping hippies.
Oh, and the line made up of Chrises who used to play on teams I like just scored.
Gilroy worshipping hippies.
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I feel like I should be a tireless campaigner until everybody says “nine-ten.”
See, I don’t have any problem with “oh-nine”, since you wouldn’t call the year “twenty-nine”, would you? No, everyone can just whip themselves into shape and call it “oh-nine ten”. It’s not that hard! (I feel like this is probably a losing battle. Heh.)
Every time I see that show, I just want to go back in time and give seven-year-old mcguggs a big hug. And order pizza.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I don’t think it ever crossed Boomer’s mind to ask us if we wanted to dress up like Barbie. Especially considering we weren’t allowed to have long hair until we were in middle school and capable of taking care of it ourselves.
No, everyone can just whip themselves into shape and call it “oh-nine ten”.
I’ll accept “oh-nine ten.” I like “nine-ten” just for balance, personally. I wouldn’t want people to say “eight-nine,” but now that “ten” is here, I like “nine-ten.” It’s a transition to the paradise of double-digit years. :D
Just as long as it’s not “oh-ten” I’m fine.
I don’t think it ever crossed Boomer’s mind to ask us if we wanted to dress up like Barbie.
I had absolutely no choice in the matter. My dad suggested we chop my hair off one time and we both giggled until we realized it would mean our deaths. He did take a stand when it came to footwear. In his words, “This isn’t Imperialist China. I don’t care if those are cute! The don’t fit her!”
“This isn’t Imperialist China. I don’t care if those are cute! The don’t fit her!”
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Hey, is Patty Elias going to be on the IR for a long time?
“This isn’t Imperialist China. I don’t care if those are cute! The don’t fit her!”
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Hey, is Patty Elias going to be on the IR for a long time?
They say something like 4-6 weeks, I think, but I suspect it’ll be longer. Just because it wouldn’t be the Devils if he came back in a timely, not-weird manner.
Thanks, Schnookie! I put him on the IR.
Good thinking. I had to fight Yahoo pretty hard to put Hossa on IR last night. It was not something I figured out easily.
Every year Yahoo changes how to put a guy on IR just so every year someone somewhere ends up on the brink of tears for not being able to figure it out.
Hossa’s injured already? I might have known that…I’m all out of sorts, being mostly away from the ‘nets.
(Lehtinen lasted half a practice.)
Hossa was hurt before he signed with the Hawks, wasn’t he?
(Lehtinen lasted half a practice.)
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Typical. Heh.
She’s probably just gonna use that as an excuse when my team kicks her teams’ ass!! And by kicking ass, I mean barely squeaking by with the points only my defense acquires.
The ‘Soxers are losing miserably this week, but that’s to be expected — they can’t bear to be the reason Craig Anderson’s team loses!
If you can’t win this week, mcguggs, your team is stupid. I only have guys playing, like, ONE day.
If you can’t win this week, mcguggs, your team is stupid.
Jovo: “Heeeeyyyyy!!”
Soupy: “No, she said the other team is stupid.”
Jovo: “Oh, sorry. I hear ‘stupid’ and just assume.”
Soupy: “I hear that.”
*fist bumps*
I think you’re right, Schnookie. I think he had surgery already.
mguffers, :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::!
Heeeeey. Have you bugged the Too Oranges’ dressing room? That’s uncanny!
It’s better than the Fire Clown locker room. “Who are you?” “That guy on the Avs.” “Oh. Who are you?” “I used to be a Flyer.” “Oh.”
“Who are you?” “That guy on the Avs.” “Oh. Who are you?” “I used to be a Flyer.” “Oh.”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Fortunately, my guys are too dumb for that. None of them can remember what teams they’ve played for.
Fortunately, my guys are too dumb for that. None of them can remember what teams they’ve played for.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I love that we’ve started anti-trash talking. And I have to agree with the first week’s schedule for the WC teams. I have three days where they play. This should be promising.
I love that we’ve started anti-trash talking.
Yeah, that’s kind of the name of the game here at IPB, isn’t it?
WOO HOOO! I love it when the Rangers lose!
Woo-hoo! The Rangers lost! Let the season begin!
YAY! The Rangers aren’t going undefeated! Despite what their broadcasters probably thought.
I guess Gilroy decided to wait a game before unleashing his unbeatableness.
Gilroy is starting to sound a little human!
Good News: Rangers lost
Bad News: Gomez is going to piece this together with the Habs win and assume it’s all him.
Gomez is going to piece this together with the Habs win and assume it’s all him.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: He’s not that smart. Or rather, he would have assumed the same even if the Rangers had won. He’s an equal-opportunity delusional egoist. :P
He’s an equal-opportunity delusional egoist. :P
Tomorrow night’s game isn’t going to help. Someone better tell him that beating the Sabres doesn’t mean anything.
According to the guy who reported on Markov, the Habs are somewhere around here tonight. I was thinking about hunting him down and telling him how much I loved him on Fantasy Island.
Someone better tell him that beating the Sabres doesn’t mean anything.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: It doesn’t matter to him. No matter what happens on the ice, he still thinks he’s brighter than the sun. Heh.
I can’t believe you’re not stalking the Habs RIGHT NOW!
I can’t believe you’re not stalking the Habs RIGHT
NOW!
I know, right? I figured Ice Dancers don’t stalk. Now if Komisarek was a still Hab, I’d have a reservation at every downtown hotel until I found him. (Actually that’s a lie. Downtown is so torn up right now, even Komi’s pecs of gold would not get me to drive there.)
I figured Ice Dancers don’t stalk.
That’s such a good point. It’s in our contracts. We’re the stalkees, not the stalkers.
We’re the stalkees, not the stalkers.
So why isn’t Goose in my backyard?
Gomez is going to piece this together with the Habs win and assume it’s all him.
Oh crap. I’ve got Gomez! Sheesh. Thank goodness for Chris Pronger. Yup. Got him, too. Heh.
Gak. Stupid Pacific Standard Time. I miss all the good stuff.
:-(
Gak. Stupid Pacific Standard Time. I miss all the good stuff.
I’m with you on this. Heh. Good night I guess. I’m about to have lunch.
Carol, I always feel so bad for our Pacific Time Zone people! What you guys need to do is get onto East-Coast time. Talk to your boss about that, so you can plan to be in the office at 6 a.m. and out by 2 p.m…. :P (I have no idea what times you’d have to switch to to make that happen, Grrrreg, but it’s just a sacrifice you should make, so as to be able to watch the most hockey and hang out with us. Right? Right? :P)
Yeah, Grrrreg! Who doesn’t like to stay up til 3am talking about sparkly-assed pants?
Who doesn’t like to stay up til 3am talking about sparkly-assed pants?
Only an IDIOT wouldn’t want to do that! :P
Ahahah! Well it turns out I regularly do just that actually… And I consider it way less insane than staying up to watch Gomer and Gill!
Gomer and Gill are the kinds of players that make a person rethink his or her priorities. :P
So, hey, how about those Canucks? UGH. Okay, so I think I’ll stick with Pookie’s theory – they are slow starters.
Wow, I just saw the final score. Someone needs to tell the Canucks that it’s October now. Yeesh!
And I just finished processing the hot peppers from our garden and farm share. I had to take off the stems, seed them, roughly chop them, pulse them in the food processor, then bag them all up. I ended up with three quarts of minced hot peppers. And even with rubber gloves, my hands are KILLING me. It burns! IT BURNS! I think I’m going to be a game-time decision for our game diary tonight. (I say, typing this comment. Hm. I should take some lessons from Paulie on how to convincingly and conveniently get injured at opportune times… :P)