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Archive for September, 2009

1-2-3 Hockey: 30 of 39

September 21 2009

This truck delivering pumpkins, gourds, and corn stalks was spotted in the parking lot of the grocery store. Must be getting to be autumn!

1-2-3 Hockey: 31 of 39

September 22 2009

Last year we made Katamari one of our 365s, so imagine our delight with being able to pay that day homage with another Katamari shot today. Of course, this is Katamari Forever, which just came out. We had a huge scare when we got word this afternoon that the power was out in our neighborhood, but our local power company made good, and we were able to spend a magnificent evening rolling up new stars.

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Attention IPB Leaguers! This post is for you! (This post is also mostly recycled from last year; we’re all about efficiency here at IPB.) By now you should have received an invite from Andrew to join either the Amazingleague or the Superleague. By now you should have registered your team. And by Thursday, September 24th — and this is the most important thing EVAH — you must exclude all of the players in your favorite team’s conference. If you’re a Blues fan (shudder), you must exclude all, and we mean all, players from Western Conference teams from your draft-eligble players list. If you’re a Panthers fan (what, St. Louis isn’t good enough for you?), you must exclude all, and we mean all, players from Eastern Conference teams from your draft-eligible players list. We mean business on this matter; this fantasy league is meant to be a fun educational experience, dammit! If you do not exclude all the necessary players from your draft-eligible list, and end up accidentally drafting players from the wrong conference, you will have to jettison them from your roster and then you’ll be stuck choosing from the dregs of the correct conference that were left behind. Believe us, that is a fate worse than death.

Now you might be asking, “That’s all well and good, but how do I exclude players, O Wise Ookies?” It’s simple:

1: Click on the “Draft Central” tab.

2: Select “Pre Draft Rankings” at the top of the screen.

3: Above the list of “Default Player Rankings”, there is a small link that reads “Edit My Rankings”.

4: The following screen shows three columns — Excluded Players, List of Players, My Players. You must go through every single player in the List of Players box and move all players from the conference you’re NOT drafting from, using the arrows between the boxes, to the Excluded Players box. This sounds like an unholy terror of a task, but really, it should take about 20 minutes. If you’re slow. And if you’re like Pookie, you’ll ask every few minutes, “Columbus is in the WC, right?” And if you’re like Schnookie, you’ll spend the entire exercise saying, “Thank goodness I’m not drafting from the East. All these players suck!” The most important step of all, once you’ve moved all the players you aren’t allowed to have on your team, is to hit the “SAVE” button at the top of the screen. Because goodness knows, you don’t want to have to do that all again, do you?

The Amazing and SuperLeagues will have auto-drafts, which means that once you’re done sorting your players, you’re good to go. The draft order will be set at random by Yahoo, and then when the computer runs the draft for us, you’ll be given the highest-ranked player available whenever your turn comes up. If you want to go with the pre-set rankings, that works. If you feel the pre-set rankings are totally bogus and don’t give, say, The Iron Boar (ranked number 421 over all) enough respect, then you can set your own rankings in the “My Players” box. The draft will be two days from today (namely: Thursday, September 24), so get sorting!

We’ll be providing updates on both the leagues here on IPB so you can enjoy all the fun and excitement from across the best fantasy league in all the land, but please take note of the message boards and smack talk features on Yahoo. Take note, and use prodigiously. The more swagger and smack talk the better, right? And taking the time to talk smack will help your bolster your self esteem as you face the unenviable task of taking on the juggernaut Craig Andersoxers and The Too Oranges. Starting today, you’re all gunning for second place.

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1-2-3 Hockey: 29 of 39

September 20 2009

An empty countertop is like the changing leaves as a sign of fall. For the first time in about two months, the counter on the island is not covered with giant bowls of tomatoes.

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1-2-3 Hockey: 28 of 39

September 19 2009

It was finally time to admit that our dishwasher didn’t have anything left to give, so we bit the bullet and bought a new one. It was delivered today and it’s pretty fancy. The hard well water we have here, though, will make short work of knocking the smile off this dishwasher’s fancy face. No dishwasher is a match for our well water.

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1-2-3 Hockey: 27 of 39

September 18 2009

Today was the first time in a couple of weeks that I walked to work. It was gray and heavy and humid and seemed like rain was imminent. I was bleary-eyed and uninpsired for most of the walk, but did manage a few shots of the morning glories trailing up the corn stalks at the farm; this was the only one that really worked out. Then, as soon as I got to work, the sun came out and it was a beautiful, photogenic day. Of course. –Schn.

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1-2-3 Hockey: 26 of 39

September 17 2009

The other day we got a cheap quilting magazine that was full of hideous designs, but also happened to have a giant ad for eQuilter.com that featured some hilarious retro Christmas fabrics. I couldn’t resist checking it out, even though I have never really been inclined to shop eQuilter.com because its interface is so annoying. Well, good thing I persevered, because there were SO MANY awesome fabrics of all kinds. SO. MANY. I ended up buying a nice little heap of fabulous retro Christmas prints, and then Pookie and I went back for more non-seasonal discontinued prints that we haven’t seen anywhere else. What an amazing fabric store! Why didn’t anyone tell us about this sooner?

Anyway, my Christmas fabrics arrived in the mail today. Suffice to say, they are even cuter than I expected. –Schn.

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1-2-3 Hockey: 25 of 39

September 16 2009

Patty Party ’09 is right around the corner, so it is with much relief that our tickets arrived in the mail today. Heaven forbid we go to see the Devils and not also see the Hurricanes, right?

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