“Dispatches” “From” “Vancouver” “From” “Paulie” “Martin”

Olympics could not have been funner! My season-long plan to pretend to have a broken arm worked to perfection. No one knows that I’ve been spending the year as my alter-ego, “Charlie White”. Sure, “Charlie” didn’t win gold, but I got to fulfill my dream of being a world class ice dancer. Sure, my coaches and partner nixed my suggestion to perform my original choreography, “Arise Young Gophers”, and sure, I had to pretend to go to Michigan for a year, but it was so worth it. Did you see me rocking the Bollywood stuff? I KNOW! I rock. But, Olympics could have been funner, I suppose. They could keep going on until summertime, so I wouldn’t have to spend the next few months continuing to pretend my arm is broken.

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