Since time immemorial (pictured below), the smartest, cleverest, hawtest hockey fans have gotten their fantasy hockey fix via the super and amazing IPB Amazing/Superleagues.
If you’d like to be a part of the smartest, cleverest, hawtest fantasy hockey scene around, now’s your chance.
1. Email andrew, the fearless commish, at a_d_mattson [@] yahoo [dot] com before September 15th. Repeat, before September 15th.
2. Tell him which is your favorite team. Remember, this is a cross-conference league. If you’re a fan of an EC team, your fantasy team must be entirely comprised of WC players. There are no exceptions to this rule. And no trying to bribe andrew with more hookers and blow to try to get around this rule.
3. Watch this space for more information regarding the Auto-Draft. Andrew will make sure you get an invitation from Yahoo! to join the appropriate league (in the past we’ve had to split into two leagues, depending on the number of people). We will determine a date for the Auto-Draft that works for as many people as possible. You will then be responsible for removing all players from the opposite conference before the Draft. You may rank the remaining players as you see fit. Then Yahoo will do the rest!
4. Sit back and enjoy being canon fodder for the powerhouse teams of the Billys Peoplesoxers and Orange Cymballs.
Let the fantasy hockey season begin!
I’m so in and will be emailing Andrew shortly! Of course I won’t have much time to actually pay attention to my team this year so everyone in my league should be thrilled that they’ll have me as a punching bag.
(I’m getting in my totally ludicrous excuses in early because I am just that clever [and that consistently mediocre at the oh-so-time-consuming game of fantasy hockey]. Heh.)
You’re using law school as your excuse for not tending regularly to your team? That’s brilliant! Here I have no excuse at all! :P
I’m going to be too busy mocking Meg for using law school as an excuse to be able to pay attention to my team.
WOOO! Fantasy hockey! Now I have to remember where I put that list of team name ideas. “Stupid Tags” is the most recent, but there might have been a better one earlier.
I was reading the last thread, and I’m okay with the new rules, andrew. I have no idea how I’ll be affected by a minimum starts rule, but I assume it will be adversely. :D
Yes, I have no problem with any of the proposed rule changes although like most I think I’ll have trouble with the minimum starts. Although I never benched my goalies anyway because I was always convinced that they were going to magically start winning games and I’d wind up getting a point for the wins category. That didn’t work out so well.
Meg, I’ve been so far behind for so long, I have neglected to congratulate you on starting law school! Congratulations!
(Still no excuse for ignoring your team!)
Thanks, Patty! (I actually think the team will be excellent for procrastination purposes but I need some excuse for my crappy managing. Things that I write in parentheses totally don’t count, right?)
(I don’t think anybody heard that part.)
(Parentheses totally keep whatever you’re saying off the record.)
Well, I DID feel super/amazing, but now I am in complete, envious awe of the awesomeness of Billys Peoplesoxers. I’m almost ready to give up my autonomy to become part of Peoplesoxylvania, but instead all I can do is devote all of my spare time and most of my unspare time to trying to think of a team name that is even remotely clever.
(Off the record, I will fail.)
I DID feel super/amazing, but now I am in complete, envious awe of the awesomeness of Billys Peoplesoxers.
Ditto. Not that that has not put the slightest dent in my conviction that I am Pretty Fabulous (PreFabs for short). So that’s what I’m going with, clever or not!
My only fantasy hockey resolution this year is to not employ one Jonathan Cheechoo. And I can’t end up with my other Cross To Bear (Huet), because he’s been shipped off to Switzerland. It’ll be a whole new team of PreFabs!
There were entirely too many “not”s in my first sentence. Please ignore the second instance of the word.
I’m in. The Bdazzld Sparkleponies are ready to kick some ass. If I don’t change their name first, that is.
Good morning, everyone! Looks like we’ve got some awesome team names going here! I would love to see the uniforms for the PreFabs (I’m assuming they’re made of pre-formed concrete) and the Bdazzld Sparkleponies (I’m assuming they’re made of a shitload of glittery geegaws).
My only fantasy hockey resolution this year is to not employ one Jonathan Cheechoo.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::: My resolution is to not drop a guy like Ed Jovonovski on Day 1 just because I remembered him being a loser a few years ago.
I am humbled by the PreFabs (even with Cheechoo in the lineup. Or, better yet, multiple, prefabricated Cheechoos!) and the Bdazzld Sparkleponies! BRILLIANT!
As for resolutions about specific players, I resolve to stay the course. The Too Oranges hit on a winning system last year, and I will not change it! (How that system differed from the NON winning systems of years prior, I have no idea. But still! I clearly know what I’m doing!)
I’m assuming they’re made of a shitload of glittery geegaws
Of course! The more whickety-whack trim, the merrier.
(PreFabs for short)
Awesome.
The Bdazzld Sparkleponies are ready to kick some ass. If I don’t change their name first, that is.
:^:::::::::::::
I’m not the only one picturing a team of My Little Ponies skating around upright in glittery hockey pants, am I?
…Am I?
Bdazzld Sparkleponies
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I clearly know what I’m doing!
You should give seminars!
I’m not the only one picturing a team of My Little Ponies skating around upright in glittery hockey pants, am I?
This. Must. Happen.
I’m not the only one picturing a team of My Little Ponies skating around upright in glittery hockey pants, am I?
You are most decidedly not alone in that. Heh.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Fantasy hockey! Yay! Everyone, get your e-mails in and I’ll handle the rest.
Meg, so glad to see you playing this year. I thought for sure we’d lose you to law school. Stupid responsibilities.
Kathleen, you’re playing! Clever name or not!
Bdazzld Sparkleponies
(PreFabs for short)
Rad. Love it.
My Little Ponies
I was having flashbacks to last year, I thought that said “My Little Peons”. I was like, huh, must be Megs new team name.
Ooh, fantasy hockey! It’s been a while since I’ve done that, usually I just do fantasy football. It’s easy when there’s only one game a week.
Now it’s time to figure out who’s actually stupid enough to play in the West, and pick a team name.
Bangers and Smash? Steak and Kidney DIE? Double-Decker Abuses? United KingDEATH?
I’m pretty fond of Steak and Kidney DIE. You can keep the pie though.
The Broken Noses and the Pot Roasters are going to combine their collective awesomeness back into one team this year. I kept forgetting about mine and ended up with a lot of burnt roasts. Not so awesome.
So should we be the Broken Roasters? Nose Pots, Broken Pots, or Nose Roasters? Hmmm. I’m torn between Broken Roasters or Nose Roasters.
Bangers and Smash?
That’s pretty good, I like that one Tim.
Steak and Kidney DIE? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love that! Boomer reads tons of cheesy murder mysteries, and one of our favorite things to tease her about is the ridiculous titles. Our favorite, by far, being “Crime Brulee”. We keep trying to make similar titles up, and suck at it. Steak and Kidney Die? That, sir, is unmitigated genius. I’m going to spend the rest of the day thinking, “I wish I’d said that.”
“My Little Peons”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: That would be fantastic!
And Myra, your combined team has so many name options! It’s a bounteous bounty of hilarious names!
I kept forgetting about mine and ended up with a lot of burnt roasts. Not so awesome.
So Dave will be the GM overseeing the day-to-day, and you’ll be the owner, watching out for the big picture. Nice combo, I like it.
You should have the kid make the leap and sign up for her own team.
Lord knows we always need more WC fans.
“Crime Brulee”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;
My favourite was one that Mike said on MST3K while watching
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians: “O’ Little Town of DEATHlehem”
“O’ Little Town of DEATHlehem”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Okay, that one is brilliant.
“O’ Little Town of DEATHlehem”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Bless MST3K. That’s genius.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: to all of this, especially My Little Peons!
Hockey really, really needs to come back. I had a horrible time of it at the gym today, because I’ve got some stupid allergy induced cold. I could really do with watching some fscking hockey already. And that’s my story.
I think these next few months are gonna be awesome. Going to DC, Machete comes out, excuses to go dancing in New York going to Atlanta, wedding in Indiana, my birthday, hockey starts, Halloween, QI and Littlebigplanet 2 (Stephen Fry double-whammy!), Thanksgiving! Wooooo
Bangers and Smash might be the best hockey team name ever. I’m actually kind of shocked that it isn’t yet represented somewhere in the minor leagues. Baton Rouge Bangers and Smash, anyone?
Tim, I have nothing more to say to you.
Baton Rouge Bangers and Smash, anyone?
I’m reading a book about Louisiana (please don’t ask me why, I liked the cover), and that team has yet to come up. But I’m sure it will!
Love you too Mags. Time to cheer up! Eid ul-Fitr is in 10 days!
Aw, Mags, I’m sorry you’ve got the kind of cold that demands hockey to watch! That blows! Meanwhile, I think I can last a few more weeks without hockey, because we’ve got a couple more seasons each of Dr. Quinn and Simon & Simon, plus the US Open is on. Of course, Pookie and I are both on vacation for the second half of this week, so we’ll probably finish all our DVDs by next Tuesday. Then I’ll be whining for hockey!
Tim, that sounds like quite a power alley of fun and excitement the next few months! :D
Time to cheer up! Eid ul-Fitr is in 10 days!
Thursday. I’ll cheer up Thursday, after some terrible individual has poked and prodded me and forced me to stand on scales while some other loathsome creature writes things on a clipboard. After which I will scarf down a tray of brownies so fast, you won’t even have time to flip the bird at someone telling you eat more protein.
(It’s not all that bad. I just really, really don’t like scales.)
You only have to fast until sundown you know.
I just really, really don’t like scales.
Reptile houses and aquariums must be your own personal hells.
You only have to fast until sundown you know.
Well damn I new I was getting something wrong! How come no one tells me these things until it’s too late!
Reptile houses and aquariums must be your own personal hells.
*shudders* Don’t drink the water. Don’t even touch it. Not one drop.
Those are all great names! Especially yours, Tim. Especially Double-Decker Abuses. :P Second only to Steak and Kidney DIE.
I just looked at my list I’ve been keeping of possible names and they’re all jokes that are no longer funny. Although I still might like “Fail-Over Clusters.”
Patty, I was also keeping of list of possible names, all of which don’t seem funny now. In fact, I strongly suspect they weren’t funny at the time. :P (I fully put forth that The Orange Cymballs is hardly a world-beater, but it’s going to have to do.)
I like The Orange Cymballs! Orange things are never not funny.
As Witchy-Poo says, “Oranges Poranges! Who says! There ain’t no rhyme for oranges.”
::sniffle:: Thanks, Patty! I feel better about myself now!