The one interesting thing that came out of the Sharks drubbing was Chico’s admission that David Clarkson is now sporting a lucky elephant of some kind. What kind, you ask? We’ve used our mad reporter skillz to find some leads; we’re not entirely sure which of these elephants is most prone to wrap-arounds, but we’ve attempted to rate the likelihood of each to be the poster elephant for the Devils’ lack of luck this season.
0 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: No self-respecting woman would be caught near these losers.
1 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: While it does have its trunk raised “for luck”, it seems to be helping out a baseball player, not a hockey player.
2 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: The Devils PP meetings always involve oversized, novelty tea cups, but Clarkson’s not usually at those meetings. Plus, this elephant’s trunk is in the unlucky “down” position.
4 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: Trunk up? Check. Demonstration of mad physical skillz? Check. Appearing, on paper at least, to have everything it takes to win? Check. So what’s the one thing keeping this from being the Devils’ good-luck charm? It seems to be responding to coaching, which we all know is something none of the Devils could abide, not even in their lucky talismans.
4.5 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: The lack of a trunk-up posture is made up for in spades by the Hambone-esque figure doing what we’d all like to do to the unlucky spirits cursing this stupid team of stupid losing losers. Oh, look who’s here! It’s the number one overall draft pick!
5 out of 5 Wrap-Arounds: If there was ever going to be a talisman standing in for this year’s Devils, it’s most definitely a disembodied elephant head that lives in a railyard.
