Wherein PandoNation Discovers An Unexpected Legacy Of Its Emperor-God

« Devils @ Blue Jackets: Nary A Green Bowler In Sight

Wherein PandoNation Discovers An Unexpected Legacy Of Its Emperor-God

March 23, 2011 by Schnookie

Today at work Schnookie had a lively, wide-ranging conversation about hockey with a colleague who self-describes as a Devils fan. Typical of conversations with near-strangers at this time of year, Schnookie struggled on the subject of how much she should or shouldn’t hate the Flyers, and struggled to convey to the near-stranger how much they should hate the Caps. Eventually, after tiptoeing around the subject of why “Flyers/Rangers” is not as good an example of a playoff series in which there are no winners as, say, “Caps/Rangers”, Schnookie got the coworker to concede that there are Flyers players she would like to have on the Devils. The conversation just got weird from there:

Schnookie: “Like Beak– Mike Richards?”
Coworker: “No, not him…”
Schnookie: “Like Claude Giroux?”
Coworker: “No, not him…”
Schnookie: “Braydon Coburn??”
Coworker: “No — Jeff Carter!”
Schnookie: Leeringly, “Ooh, with his blond hair and white teeth?”
Coworker: Protesting too much, “No, I want him for his skills!”
Schnookie: “Yeah, like I’ve never said that before.”
Coworker: “No! I think he’s good! We need him for the Devils!”
Schnookie: “Well, I’d definitely want him on the Devils, but Parise and Kovalchuk are both goalscorers. In this imaginary Flyers dispersal draft, I think I want a playmaker. Like Beak– Richards.” [Shifty eyes. This is totally a hockey-related choice.]
Coworker: “Who was the playmaker who used to be with the Devils? We need that guy back.”
Schnookie: Disgusted, “Scott Gomez?”
Coworker: Equally disgusted, “No! He was done even before he left. No… who was the other guy?”
Schnookie: “???”
Coworker: “You know who I want back for the Devils? RACHUNEK!”
Schnookie: Dumbfounded.
Coworker: Beams.
Schnookie: Completely uncertain of how to respond to Rachunek and changing the subject, “You know who I want back? Pandolfo.”
Coworker: Elated, “Yes! HE was a playmaker!”

Apparently, Gentle Reader, PandoNation never even realized what it had.

About these ads

Posted in Jay Pandolfo | 106 Comments

106 Responses

on March 23, 2011 at 8:45 pm mcguffers

Well Coworker got Gomez right!

Do the Stars and Ducks only play each other?
on March 23, 2011 at 9:01 pm Schnookie

Yup — Gomez’s suckiness transcends all levels of hockey ignorance!

And I think the Stars and Ducks only ever play each other. (We’re a half hour behind, because we were watching ANTM, though.)
on March 23, 2011 at 9:07 pm Schnookie

Dude, 30 minutes late, BRAD LUKOWICH? Boomer was like, “Wow, we never even thought of bringing him back for the Devils.”
on March 23, 2011 at 9:16 pm Myra

Yes. These are desparate times for the Stars.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:22 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I think Crawford was planning to scratch Fistric and put Lukowich in, but then he realized he was still short a defensemen. After a second of wondering if anybody would notice he had only iced 19 players, he grudgingly added Fistric to the lineup. (I do not get that guy.)
on March 23, 2011 at 9:24 pm Myra

I do not get his dislike of Fistric. I have not seen anything that would warrant the benching he has been giving Fist.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:25 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Coworker: “You know who I want back for the Devils? RACHUNEK!”
Schnookie: Dumbfounded.
Coworker: Beams.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

No offense, but where is Pando now? (I had no idea Beauchemin was back with the Ducks. When did that happen?)
on March 23, 2011 at 9:27 pm Pookie

I think Beauchemin was traded a little before the deadline. He’s a Soxer. He’s beating the pants off the 1st place Mutinous Peons.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:29 pm Schnookie

Last I heard, Pando was working as a part-time front-office intern for Lou. I can only assume that means he’s responsible for keeping Lou’s stapler full. (Ifyouknowwhatimean?)
on March 23, 2011 at 9:34 pm Meg

He’s beating the pants off the 1st place Mutinous Peons.

Second place. :( The Peons lost their first place spot to Stanley’s Cupholders after the Ice Trolls beat the pants off them last week. They’re picking a very bad time to go into a slump. And also for a certain very good looking Blackhawk to get hurt. I think they might need some prozac or something.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:35 pm mcguffers

Now that Kari’s not getting a shutout, I need BobbyRyan, Teeemuuu, B-Rad, and Rub-a-dub to all get hat tricks and 10 minute majors. This game needs to become a shit show soon.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:36 pm mcguffers

And of course, Kari needs to stay in and win.

I don’t ask for much.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:38 pm Schnookie

Meg, that’s awful that the Peons lost their first-place standing on the last day of the season! Poor things. I wouldn’t know anything about that, though, because the Hobos held their place in 10th like their lives depended on it. They were NOT giving up that spot, nosiree. Good job, Hobos. Sigh.

I don’t ask for much.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Yeah, your demands seemed perfectly reasonable to me.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:40 pm Myra

mcguffers, I agree with about half of your demands. But I wouldn’t get your hopes up.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:43 pm Meg

Meg, that’s awful that the Peons lost their first-place standing on the last day of the season!

Yeah, between that and the state of my basketball bracket things are not looking up here.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:44 pm Pookie

Meg, I had no idea the MPs were 2nd! Here I was thinking the ‘Soxers could pull off a historic 8-1 upset! Now they don’t have any motivation to win!
on March 23, 2011 at 9:45 pm Meg

Now they don’t have any motivation to win!

Well that’s not good. Now both our teams will be skating listlessly around the ice playing bad hockey.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:47 pm mcguffers

Myra, I’ll sacrifice my Ducks’s points, but B-Rad and Rub-a-Dub have to get at least a few goals and 3 assists if Teemu isn’t.

I have a feeling the DeadlEEs are going to be the Sabres of Fantasy Hockey. Finish 3rd in regular season, then lose to the 6th seed in the playoffs. Bastards.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:48 pm Pookie

Now both our teams will be skating listlessly around the ice playing bad hockey.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: We’re such good coaches! (By the way, how’s law school going now? Still lots of work? :D)
on March 23, 2011 at 9:49 pm mcguffers

Now both our teams will be skating listlessly around the ice playing bad hockey.

The Senators and Panthers are playing?
on March 23, 2011 at 9:51 pm Patty (in Dallas)

And of course, Kari needs to stay in and win.

While I wouldn’t be surprised if it became a shit show, even an idiot like Crawford would probably eventually pull Kari if it did. :D
on March 23, 2011 at 9:52 pm Patty (in Dallas)

How’s it going, Meg? Can you check and see how the Squeezins are doing? I assume they’re still 12th or something.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:52 pm Meg

<(By the way, how’s law school going now? Still lots of work? :D)

Oh, yes. But I have a job offer for the summer now so I’m significantly less stressed than I was when I thought I was going to be sad and unemployed and not able to get my minimal public interest funding. (Seriously, it should not be so hard to find someone who wants you to work for free [the school pays for us.])

I’m going to be working in Washington for the summer. I just can’t wait for the delightful humidity and heat as I bike or walk to the train station each morning.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:55 pm Meg

Can you check and see how the Squeezins are doing? I assume they’re still 12th or something.

I can’t see them…maybe you have to be in the consolation bracket to see it? That’s odd…I can see that they were in 10th when the regular season ended though.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:56 pm Schnookie

Congrats on the job, Meg! That’s great news! It’s less great that you’ll be in Washington (::shudder::), but a job is a good thing! Does it sound like it’s going to be fun?
on March 23, 2011 at 9:57 pm mcguffers

We’re such good coaches!

I can actually picture us all behind the benches of our teams. I’m pretty sure in our league you’d have Mags knitting her team’s uniforms, Andrew has one of those baby backpack thingys, Schnookie is drunk, and I’ve invested in skates with velcro.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:58 pm Pookie

Ew, you’re going to be in Capsland! Ick! Congratulations on the job offer, though!
on March 23, 2011 at 9:59 pm Patty (in Dallas)

I can see that they were in 10th when the regular season ended though.

WHAT?! The season ended?! I was setting my roster way ahead, but maybe it got away from me.
on March 23, 2011 at 9:59 pm Pookie

mcguffers, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Totally!
on March 23, 2011 at 10:00 pm Schnookie

I’m pretty sure in our league you’d have Mags knitting her team’s uniforms, Andrew has one of those baby backpack thingys, Schnookie is drunk, and I’ve invested in skates with velcro.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: SURELY the Amazing/SuperLeagues have velcro skates mandated in the CBA.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:00 pm Patty (in Dallas)

And congratulations on the job, Meg!
on March 23, 2011 at 10:01 pm Meg

Does it sound like it’s going to be fun?

I’m not sure…I think I’ll pretty much be doing legal research which isn’t awful but isn’t super-fun. But it’s an organization that’s trying to “democratize access to Constitutional sources” and I like history so that’s a good sign. And my future boss seems nice.

At least all the Caps will probably be away from Capsland, right?
on March 23, 2011 at 10:02 pm Schnookie

WHAT?! The season ended?!

For reals! On Sunday afternoon I very carefully set my roster for this week, and then on Monday I logged in to see who I was playing… and I wasn’t playing. It was devastating. I really wasn’t expecting to end so abruptly. And painfully. And suckily.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:04 pm Meg

WHAT?! The season ended?!

On Sunday. I’ve been doing a better job keeping up on fantasy hockey than actual hockey this year. So shameful.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:04 pm Schnookie

And my future boss seems nice.

That’s the key! :D

And one can only HOPE the Caps will be long gone by the time you get there.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:11 pm mcguffers

But it’s an organization that’s trying to “democratize access to Constitutional sources” and I like history so that’s a good sign.

I can’t pronounce the word “democratize” but the job sounds awesome! … In a democratizing kind of way!

SURELY the Amazing/SuperLeagues have velcro skates mandated in the CBA.

My team wears helmets off the ice. Kathleen’s team has to wear full body casts. And I picture Frisby as Dolph Lundgren leading his team of unstoppable storm troopers.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:15 pm Patty (in Dallas)

My team wears helmets off the ice.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on March 23, 2011 at 10:15 pm Schnookie

My team wears helmets off the ice. Kathleen’s team has to wear full body casts. And I picture Frisby as Dolph Lundgren leading his team of unstoppable storm troopers.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Frisby’s team of amphibious elite soldiers is scary, man. My team isn’t allowed out of the dressing room without significant supervision. You let one of them out of your sight for even a minute, and disaster will ensue.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:18 pm Patty (in Dallas)

My team isn’t allowed out of the dressing room without significant supervision.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

My team can’t even find its own way out of the dressing room.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:22 pm Myra

Our team wears pocket protectors and tries to hug everyone. They are a confused bunch.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:22 pm mcguffers

Frisby’s team of amphibious elite soldiers is scary, man.

No joke! I think he had a playoff spot clinched in week 3.

My team isn’t allowed out of the dressing room without significant supervision. You let one of them out of your sight for even a minute, and disaster will ensue.

My team can’t even find its own way out of the dressing room.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

My team waits until we’re walking out of the dressing room before telling me they all have to go to the bathroom.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:23 pm Schnookie

My team can’t even find its own way out of the dressing room.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: On the bright side, though, your team inspired us to plant a mulberry bush last weekend. That’s got to be worth something, right? (It’s the Squeezins Memorial Mulberry Bush. We’ll install a plaque someday.)
on March 23, 2011 at 10:24 pm Schnookie

We’re all caught up with the game now, and it’s always so nice to get up to speed in time to have to listen to the Ducks announcers in the intermission. I love how operatically dumb they are.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:24 pm Pookie

The ‘Soxers dressing room resembles nothing so much as the Round Table at the Algonquin. Even without honorary WC captain Getzi.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:25 pm Schnookie

The ‘Soxers dressing room resembles nothing so much as the Round Table at the Algonquin. Even without honorary WC captain Getzi.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Getzi: “Well I, for one, most certainly do not make passes at girls who wear glasses.”
on March 23, 2011 at 10:25 pm mcguffers

Our team wears pocket protectors and tries to hug everyone. They are a confused bunch.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: It’s a good thing we don’t play each other. Khabibulin might try to get them to drink out of his “water” bottle.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:26 pm Pookie

Getzi: “Well I, for one, most certainly do not make passes at girls who wear glasses.”

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::: You can bring a Getzi to culture…
on March 23, 2011 at 10:27 pm Schnookie

Our team wears pocket protectors and tries to hug everyone. They are a confused bunch.

My team waits until we’re walking out of the dressing room before telling me they all have to go to the bathroom.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: to both of you!
on March 23, 2011 at 10:28 pm mcguffers

in time to have to listen to the Ducks announcers in the intermission. I love how operatically dumb they are.

It’s because of them I know that Brad has new skates tonight because he likes firmness. Heh. Yeah he does.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:28 pm Patty (in Dallas)

(It’s the Squeezins Memorial Mulberry Bush. We’ll install a plaque someday.)

That’s so sweet! I hope it’s not as half-assed at producing berries as the Squeezins are at finding their way out of the dressing room.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm Patty (in Dallas)

It’s because of them I know that Brad has new skates tonight because he likes firmness. Heh. Yeah he does.

Hmm.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:33 pm Schnookie

It’s because of them I know that Brad has new skates tonight because he likes firmness. Heh. Yeah he does.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Haysie: “So I asked him how he likes it, and he said he likes it firm. Players these days. They like it to be firm.”

I hope it’s not as half-assed at producing berries as the Squeezins are at finding their way out of the dressing room.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: So far it seems half-assed at having things like branches or leaves. It’s kind of just a stick.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:37 pm Myra

It’s because of them I know that Brad has new skates tonight because he likes firmness. Heh. Yeah he does.

Myra’s thought process….Brad….B-rad…firmness….Faints deadaway….
on March 23, 2011 at 10:38 pm mcguffers

Haysie: “So I asked him how he likes it, and he said he likes it firm. Players these days. They like it to be firm.”

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: “I went on to ask him about shaft length and curvature. He said he plays with a long one. The longest in the league in his opinion. And minimal curve.”
on March 23, 2011 at 10:39 pm Pookie

I went on to ask him about shaft length and curvature.

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on March 23, 2011 at 10:39 pm Myra

Oh my…. Faints again…
on March 23, 2011 at 10:39 pm Schnookie

I went on to ask him about shaft length and curvature. He said he plays with a long one. The longest in the league in his opinion. And minimal curve.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I can’t keep up with you, mcguggs.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:44 pm mcguffers

I find hockey very pornographic.

And I’m a pervert.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:45 pm Schnookie

I find hockey very pornographic.

And I’m a pervert.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Those are both things to be proud of.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:45 pm Pookie

And I’m a pervert.

Quit trying your preversions on us! P.O.E! P.O.E! (In hockey-speak that stands for “Purity of Elephant-guns-in-the-rear”, not essence. Although I’m sure Haysie is also worried about Commie fluoride.)
on March 23, 2011 at 10:48 pm Patty (in Dallas)

Recently Brad commented on the impressive size of his teammate’s knob.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:49 pm mcguffers

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
on March 23, 2011 at 10:51 pm mcguffers

Sonofabitch. Mags has Morrow.

Maybe RicHards could lay off other guys’ knobs and score a freaking shortie.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:53 pm mcguffers

Well, now it would be a shortie. Math is hard.
on March 23, 2011 at 10:53 pm Schnookie

Maybe RicHards could lay off other guys’ knobs

RicHards: “NEVER! The day I lay off other guys’ firm knobs is the day I don’t want to live anymore.”
on March 23, 2011 at 10:55 pm Myra

Maybe RicHards could lay off other guys’ knobs

………………….smelling salts………………thunk……..
on March 23, 2011 at 11:00 pm Patty (in Dallas)

………………….smelling salts………………thunk……..

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Somebody needs to get Langenbrunner off the ice. Ralph is running out of polite ways to describe fumbling the puck every time it comes to him.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:01 pm mcguffers

RicHards: “NEVER! The day I lay off other guys’ firm knobs is the day I don’t want to live anymore.”

Vinny: “Phew!”

I better behave so Myra can stay conscious for the last 30 seconds.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:02 pm mcguffers

Oh snap.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:05 pm Schnookie

Somebody needs to get Langenbrunner off the ice. Ralph is running out of polite ways to describe fumbling the puck every time it comes to him.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: He should get in touch with Chico to see if he can borrow his “glossing over Langer’s failings” thesaurus.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:06 pm Schnookie

::dry, awkward cough::

So, um… how’s the weather in Dallas?
on March 23, 2011 at 11:08 pm mcguffers

Anyone, uh, seen any good movies lately?
on March 23, 2011 at 11:08 pm Schnookie

Cards? Anyone for cards?

::fumbles with a deck::
on March 23, 2011 at 11:11 pm Pookie

I think I hear the baby crying.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:12 pm mcguffers

The dog needs to go outside.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:14 pm Myra

Sigh. I have no words. I’m going to go drown my sorrow in homemade sugar cookies.
on March 23, 2011 at 11:16 pm Schnookie

Homemade sugar cookies sound like they’ll be a big help. If you have any left after drowning your sorrows, send them my way!
on March 24, 2011 at 8:54 am Amy

why “Flyers/Rangers” is not as good an example of a playoff series in which there are no winners as, say, “Caps/Rangers”

Who do you root for in Caps/Rangers?

The Peons lost their first place spot to Stanley’s Cupholders after the Ice Trolls beat the pants off them last week.

I’m surprised that the Cupholders are in first place, considering my goalie lineup is based solely on Bryzgalov and Mason, as Hiller is still trying to figure out if he can play goal without getting dizzy.
on March 24, 2011 at 11:00 am Schnookie

Who do you root for in Caps/Rangers?

Seriously, there are no winners in that case. ::shudder::
on March 24, 2011 at 11:08 am SueNJ97

When it’s evil vs. evil, what’s a Devils fan to do?

Personally, I root against the team whose fans have been the most obnoxious to me personally, so the Rangers are almost always top of the list, just because of the people who filed in and out of my office in 1996 to gloat the last time NJ missed, and in 1997 when the Rangers beat NJ in the playoffs, and whenever the Rangers finally beat NJ after the long regular season losing streak was over.

I don’t think the Caps come close to that, whatever you think of Ovechkin, their fans, etc.
on March 24, 2011 at 11:30 am Kathleen

And also for a certain very good looking Blackhawk to get hurt./i>

*unintelligible stream of profanity*

And eff you, Klesla.

I picture Frisby as Dolph Lundgren leading his team of unstoppable storm troopers.

My team waits until we’re walking out of the dressing room before telling me they all have to go to the bathroom.

Getzi: “Well I, for one, most certainly do not make passes at girls who wear glasses.”

:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Gold. All of it.
on March 24, 2011 at 11:32 am Kathleen

Who do you root for in Caps/Rangers?

I’d say Caps, since at least you can count on ‘em to blow it in the second round.
on March 24, 2011 at 11:34 am Kathleen

I woke up this morning with the mistaken belief that there was a Sabres game tonight. Now mucho disappointed. The back-up plan is to find a French-language feed to Boston-Montreal and boo every time Chara touches the puck.
on March 24, 2011 at 11:43 am Pookie

I root against the team whose fans have been the most obnoxious to me personally

I would agree whole-heartedly if we were talking pre-internet. But since I never interact with fans in the real world any more (no one at work is a hockey fan, not even the customers), and since Rangers fans are mostly illiterate and thus don’t go online, I deal with a lot more Caps fans (or did before I stopped venturing past the headlines on Kukla) online, it vaults them into that stratosphere of annoying fans. I mean, ultimately, the Rangers are way worse, because they’re the Rangers, but still.
on March 24, 2011 at 1:15 pm Mike in Idaho

Stupid yahoo, I didn’t realize until reading you all’s messages that I set my team’s lineup this week for nothing. I was taking silent joy in Fowler’s OT goal for the Foul Fowl last night out of respect for all the Stars fans here but the last laugh is on me as it doesn’t even matter. I’ll be crying in the corner if anyone needs me.
on March 24, 2011 at 1:16 pm SueNJ97

I live in North Jersey and people in my immediate social circle are Ranger fans, mostly because my friends married them. I know, I know, but it’s still not a reason to break up a friendship. Besides, I’ll never forget Ranger fans actually buying the crap Gomez was spinning when he left, that NJ had held him back offensively. And they actually believed him when he said the reason he pathetically failed to click with Jagr was that NJ had put him with players who were not skilled enough for him to succeed with someone like Jagr.
on March 24, 2011 at 1:53 pm Amy

I’d say Caps, since at least you can count on ‘em to blow it in the second round.

And it would give us the bonus giggles of watching the league attempt to promote a Sid & Ovie free playoffs.

I hate how we’re into “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” time of the season. I hate rooting for Ottawa in any way shape or form, but I have to root for them to beat the Rangers tonight.
on March 24, 2011 at 2:17 pm Schnookie

I’ll be crying in the corner if anyone needs me.

You can come sit by me, Mike. And cry with me. Heh. (Stupid AmazingLeague. How amazing can they be if I’m not the winner?? [Unless I was in the SuperLeague? I can't even remember anymore. ::SOBS::])

And they actually believed him when he said the reason he pathetically failed to click with Jagr was that NJ had put him with players who were not skilled enough for him to succeed with someone like Jagr.

:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Rangers fans are so reliably stupid about stuff like that. I really love how they always seem to feel that if a “big name” guy has signed with them, then there is ABSOLUTELY NO REASON to believe that guy isn’t AWESOME. Hey — he signed with the Rangers. That makes him great, right? Heh.
on March 24, 2011 at 2:21 pm SueNJ97

And it would give us the bonus giggles of watching the league attempt to promote a Sid & Ovie free playoffs.

Here’s the commercial:

“Umm, yeah. We have no idea who there guys are. But watch anyway. It’s the playoffs. And even though we ignore them because they aren’t Sid/Ovie, we expect you to watch to keep the ratings up and bring in ad revenue.”
on March 24, 2011 at 4:43 pm Kathleen

And it would give us the bonus giggles of watching the league attempt to promote a Sid & Ovie free playoffs.

YES!!!!!

I hate how we’re into “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” time of the season. I hate rooting for Ottawa in any way shape or form, but I have to root for them to beat the Rangers tonight.

Sigh. Double yes.
on March 24, 2011 at 4:49 pm Mike in Idaho

Rangers fans are so reliably stupid about stuff like that.

And how they decried the Devils for cap circumvention when they bury Redden’s $6.5 million in the minors, which to my admittedly biased point of view is a much more blatant form of cap circumvention.
on March 24, 2011 at 5:04 pm SueNJ97

Mike, NJ’s done the same thing several times (and, I believe, was the first team to do it), so, as much as we all hate the Rangers, you can’t point the finger at them. What did annoy me was the moralizing from Ranger fans when NJ did it and then the open pleading by those same fans for Sather to banish Kasparitis and, later, Redden. It suddenly became OK?

The ironic thing is that it wasn’t like Lou made this up. When the CBA was first released, many reporters, including Larry Brooks at the Post, noticed this loophole and reported on it. So, it was out in the open. It wasn’t like several other things that took people by surprise, like the “summer cap” when you can be 10% over, or the way you can sign people to extensions halfway through the year and it doesn’t count against that year’s cap. I’m not sure fans realized that either of those were in there, but the cap relief by banishment to the minors was reported on pretty extensively right away.
on March 24, 2011 at 5:26 pm Kathleen

Oh. My. God. This article has me on the floor. (But between the laughter I’m weeping for the future of our country.)

http://www.pressherald.com/news/ice-hockey-fights-mar-field-trip-for-some_2011-03-24.html
on March 24, 2011 at 5:27 pm Kathleen

“We were horrified by what we witnessed,” said Catherine Anderson, who attended the game with her 6-year-old son’s kindergarten class from Reiche School in Portland. “(My son) said, ‘Mommy, what’s happening?’ and I said, ‘These men are acting out of control and they’re making bad choices.’ And he said, ‘Why isn’t it stopped?’ “

Snort. This child sounds like he’d be VERY popular with his classmates.
on March 24, 2011 at 6:18 pm Mike in Idaho

NJ’s done the same thing several times (and, I believe, was the first team to do it), so, as much as we all hate the Rangers, you can’t point the finger at them.

Thanks for correcting me Sue! I totally forgot about the Devils burying Mogilny and others and that’s leaving out some of the long term injuries that some have said may have been exaggerated for cap purposes. Burying players in the minors doesn’t actually bother me, I just hated hearing Rangers fans say what a bunch of cheaters the Devils were for doing it when the Rangers were doing something similar (in my mind anyway). I do still think burying a highly paid player in the minors violates the spirit of the salary cap more than Kovalchuk’s contract did as poor teams cannot afford to do that. But the spirit of the salary cap isn’t what the league goes by…
on March 24, 2011 at 7:59 pm SueNJ97

Mike, I have an issue with the contracts like Kovalchuk’s, and the ones that have come before it, I do think they are circumvention.

My problem was that the NHL was fine with just whining about them until NJ signed Kovalchuk – and I suspect that, rather than the contract itself, this was motivated by two things. First, the union had no head when that contract was signed, which wasn’t true in the other cases, so the NHL saw that there was real weakness on the other side.

Also, I don’t think they were pleased at where the player went. If Kovy had signed that contract with teams that the NHL had felt were more “useful” to them, they would have whined again and left it to the next CBA to deal with it.

Re: burying players in the minors, that’s something that’s clearly in the CBA so it can’t be circumvention, it’s sort of like the Constitution, it cannot forbid what its text explicitly permits.
on March 24, 2011 at 9:09 pm Kathleen

This Bos-Mont game makes me want to throw up on the FLOOR. I hate you, Carey Price.
on March 24, 2011 at 9:25 pm Schnookie

We’re watching Trannies/Pens, so I can’t really speak for the quality of the play in your game, but I have to say that the Montreal/Boston score is cracking my shit up. Heh. (Sadly, the Trannies are terrible lately. So their game is not cracking my shit up.)
on March 24, 2011 at 9:32 pm Kathleen

I’ve decided it’s all Gomez’s fault. Why not?
on March 24, 2011 at 9:34 pm Schnookie

Many, many things are Gomez’s fault, so why not this too?
on March 25, 2011 at 10:29 am SueNJ97

Ookies, if you have time for a trip into NYC for a quilt exhibition (free of charge, but limited time), apparently this is supposed to be different and impressive: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704893604576200603057836930.html?KEYWORDS=katherine+clarke

Location/Exhibit info: http://www.folkartmuseum.org/infinitevariety
on March 25, 2011 at 11:27 am Pookie

Thanks for the heads up, Sue! It was already on our agenda for the weekend. :D It’s going to be tough because the quilts are going to be so awesome, but we’re all too impatient to make a quilt with only two colors, so it’ll be bittersweet to see all the gorgeousness we can’t recreate at home. Heh.
on March 25, 2011 at 11:37 am SueNJ97

My first two thoughts were, “Wow, over 600 quilts in red and white” and “Why would someone do a quilted ode to the Red Wings?”
on March 25, 2011 at 12:48 pm Pookie

“Why would someone do a quilted ode to the Red Wings?”

:^::::::::::::::::: I’ll just pretend they’re all red and black.
on March 25, 2011 at 1:07 pm Mike in Idaho

Also, I don’t think they were pleased at where the player went. If Kovy had signed that contract with teams that the NHL had felt were more “useful” to them, they would have whined again and left it to the next CBA to deal with it.

I like your conspiracy angle, I bet you’re right that if he went to the Kings, everything would have been OK. I think the most ridiculous part of the whole thing was the fining and taking away draft picks from NJ for doing what everyone else had already been setting a precedent for. I can understand disallowing the contract, but the extra punishment was just outrageous and IMO completely unwarranted. As to burying players in the minors, I thought that was just something that was a loophole that was neglected in the CBA but it sounds like allowing it was pretty intentional.
on March 25, 2011 at 1:32 pm Amy

I love that quilt that is in the WSJ article. It would look awesome in my room if it was in black or navy blue instead of red. My room is painted that vibrant red color, so I want contrasting bedding.

And is this workday over with yet? It’s been insane today.