– So we’re sitting there watching another episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, and an alien dies sort of mysteriously. When Dr. Crusher does the autopsy, she discovers that his physiology is crazy weird compared to humans’ — because he has no distinct organs, he died because of a “complete systemic failure”. As she explains it to Picard, Pookie breaks down the science in terms we can all understand: “He died of coach-killing. We can’t definitively single out any one element, but it’s likely it could have been excessive exposure to the element Langenbrunnerium.”
– Later in the same episode Crusher starts conducting her own murder investigation on the Enterprise, and Pookie wonders, “Why don’t they have MPs?” “Yeah,” says Schnookie, “Where’s Jack Reacher?” Pause. “I would love to see Reacher in the Star Trek universe.” Pookie: “Totally! Reeeeaaaaacher! Iiiiiiinnn!!! SPAAAAAAAACE! And instead of being played by Tom Cruise, Reacher could be played by Link Hogthrob.”
