Gentle Reader, you may have noticed that we’ve been kind of grumpy this season. Well, actually first we were complainy, but then we got grumpy. And you know what? We finally figured out today what the problem with the 2007-2008 season was.
We once knew a newbie fan, the likes of whom absolutely every sports fan knows. This person’s knowledge was far outpaced by their enthusiasm, and so they often made bold predictions that had no basis at all in the realm of possibility. These predictions would frequently become bets, and we would frequently take the bets because of how confident we were in our superior hockey knowledge and the fact that whatever this person was predicting had little to no chance of coming true. And then, like clockwork, those things would come true. Always. It’s the hockey fan equivalent of the office secretary winning the March Madness pool because she picked the teams based on uni colors. Only more annoying. And to make matters worse, this person is, invariably, a really gloaty winner.
This entire hockey season has seemed like that to us, like we were on the losing side of one impossible bet after another, until it got so that our wounded pride and frustration at the figurative incessant, baseless gloating was a greater distraction than the hockey itself. And this season in a microcosm? IPB’s Archnemesis, Petr fucking Sykora, and his “called shot” heroics in Game 5. Gentle Reader, we give up. We’ve been on the wrong side of every element of this hockey season, and we see no end in sight. Is it October yet?