Scott Clemmensen won the Devils Unsung Hero award? Scott Clemmensen?????
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
To whomever on the team awarded him this, we don’t believe “Unsung” means what you think it means. Clemmer could not possibly have been more sung this year. People were talking about him keeping the starting job after Marty came back. There were idiot Devils fans suggesting trading Marty in order to keep Clemmer. If Marty had taken one more week to come back, there would have been 100-foot-tall granite sculptures of Clemmer erected outside the Prudential Center. If it had taken two more weeks, those sculptures would have been solid gold.
That is Pando’s award, asshole. And if not his, Travis’s.
At least it wasn’t MVP.
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Oh wow. That’s disgusting. I think your team’s kind of dim. :D Maybe they thought unsung meant verysung.
Poor, poor, Pando.
I give Travis the “Acorn award for foxy, foxy league leading +/- and adorabley dull interviewing” This comes with extra protection against any diseases Jessica Simpson may have.
And Paulie can have the trophy for “Best pot smoking and brownie making defenceman evah” It can be nestled in a pile of pancakes.
alix, I think you’re right. They are QUITE dim. :P
And your awards are way awesomer than the team’s “official” awards! Paulie especially loves any award that comes nestled in a pile of pancakes. He’s like, “Can they be pot pancakes?”
And dude, Blersus, seriously, the Rangers/Wild? What is WRONG with you?
And Paulie can have the trophy for “Best pot smoking and brownie making defenceman evah” It can be nestled in a pile of pancakes.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: (so much better than an Unsung Hero award) And why does this blog always make me hungry?
Maybe the Devils read their ballot wrong. Florida says that easy to do.
They can totes be pot pancakes!
Ewwwww. I actually puked in my mouth a bit when I read Rangers/Wild. Blersus really outdid themselves. I think that might the dullest opposing conference match up I could think of.
And why does this blog always make me hungry?
Hungry for DRUGS, mcguffers? Hehehe!
It always makes me hungry too.
Come on, Schnookie, don’t hold back. Tell us how you really feel. ;)
Hungry for DRUGS, mcguffers? Hehehe!
and Swedes! and donuts!
Hungry for DRUGS, mcguffers? Hehehe!
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Mission accomplished! :P
And Frisby, I did hold back! I’m still feeling under the weather, and this news just made me SICKER! I’m too weak to rage adequately. Heh.
Tell us how you really feel. ;)
OK! Once upon a time there was a douchebag of a goalie, named Scott…
*fifteen
minuteshoursdays later*… And that’s why he shouldn’t win Unsung Hero. The End.
Pookie, I love when you tell that story! Especially when you do all the voices
On the bright side, Zach was voted MVD…Though he probably had Boxworthy vote 80 times so that the real winner (Travis) didn’t win.
Especially when you do all the voices
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::: Have you seen “The House Bunny”, by any chance? *deep gravely voice* CLEMMENSEN!
Especially when you do all the voices
She’s so good at them! Although I find the Clemmer voice to be almost too scary. It gives me nightmares. :P
And Boxworthy SO stuffed the ballot box this year. Last year they caught him in the act and discounted his votes, but this year he was much sneakier. (Madden voted for “Nice haircut, asshole”. Like he always does.)
Oh my gosh! I just saw House Bunny on Thursday! It was actually way funnier than I thought it would be.
VAANANEN
alix, I was not expecting “The House Bunny” to be funny but it was consistently really funny! I’m glad you enjoyed it. And yeah, Vaananen’s nickname should be, “Wait, what was his name again? Oh yeah, that’s right… VAANANEN.”
I’m so glad you’ve seen it, alix! That name joke has been KILLING me since we watched it and we’ve had nowhere to use it!
VAANANEN
Heh.
Got my grilled cheese and my positive attitude. I am so ready for this. Let’s go fucking Habs!
I want to see “The House Bunny” but I keep forgetting to order it.
Look, if Montreal can’t beat the Thrashers, they’re stupid. (I say this fully admitting that the Devils have lost to Atlanta at least twice this season.)
Yeah, I was kind of expecting really, really dumb. And was pleasantly surprised when I pretty much busted a gut the whole time.
Pookie, what a perfect nickname!
MATTIAS likes cabs.
Ugh. The Canucks lost to them once too. The Thrashers are weird, yo. Terribly awful but still somehow manage to take down really good teams.
yeahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Habs are never losing again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That was the goal that did it, mcguffers. The whole season has turned around right now!
(We’re watching CBJ/TB. EXCITING!)
I just figured out how this miscarriage of justice happened.
The scene: Devils locker room after Marty’s record breaking win last week. Everyone is in a very good mood, despite the fact that Scott Clemmensen has just made a surprise appearance in the locker room.
Marty: Um hey Scott, glad you could make it for this game. Doesn’t your team in Lowell need you though?
Scott: It’s cool, I haven’t played for a month. If it wasn’t for their lower GAA, they might not even realize I was gone. Could you sign this petition for me, it’s to eliminate the stupid trapezoid rule? I know I always get horribly confused and slightly nauseous when I am in it.
(Marty signs the paper and hands it back to Scott, who traverses the room).
Scott: Hey Bobby what’s up? I’m starting a petition to send to that bastard Bettman to tell referees to not call dumb penalties by players whose last name rhymes with Frolik.
Holik: I like it, I’ll sign.
Scott to Shanahan: Yo Brendan, want to sign my petition to limit the maximum speed that NHL players can skate on the ice? TV has trouble following the game because everyone’s too fast.
Shanahan: Cool, I can play another 7 years at least with this rule. I’ll beat that bastard Chelios’ age record yet.
Scott to Clarkson: Hey David, how’s it going? Want to sign my petition to make goalies play with 100 lb. anklets on each leg? The league says scoring needs to go up and nobody will stop your wraparounds anymore, I guarantee it.
Clarkson: Awesome dude! You rock! Won’t other goalies get mad at you about this though?
Scott: Let’s just say other goalies and I aren’t on speaking terms. (moves on to Rolston). Hey Brian long time no see! Want to sign my petition to increase the size of the net to the size of an airplane hangar?
Rolston: Cool, I might actually hit the net then. Awesome idea.
By the end of the night, Clemmensen has the signatures of all the Devils players. He walks out of the locker room and in a dramatic reveal, takes the phony top halves of the petition off to reveal the document everyone really signed.
“Lou, the team thinks Scott Clemmensen should win the unsung hero award this year and have all signed this petition.”
Clemmensen claims the award with all the grace of a dead gazelle and never once gives credit to the movie Heathers for giving him the idea of this insidious plot.
Look, if Montreal can’t beat the Thrashers, they’re stupid.
Habs: “Coke heads. Yes. Whores. Yes. Mobsters. Allegedly. Cleptos. Hells yeah. But Stupid? Now you’re just being mean.”
Mike, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::::::::::;; *gasp* :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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I especially loved the “the other goalies and I aren’t on speaking terms” bit! Genius!
When you put it like that, mcguffers… :^::::::::
Mike, that is the most brilliant thing I’ve read on the interwebs EVER. I’m giving you the most stirring slow-clap in the history of slow-claps right now, while wiping away my tears of laughter (and tears of sadness, because IT’S SO TRUE).
And I bet the team was STUNNED to have someone accepting the Unsung Hero award who DIDN’T claim that someone else deserved it. *Sniff, sniff* Poor Pando.
We’re watching CBJ/TB. EXCITING!
I’m watching Rangers/Wild. It’s a good thing I haven’t played the Marion Gaborik drinking game. Otherwise, I’d be completely shitfaced right now, as every other word out of the announcers mouth is “Gaborik.”
And I’m so sorry that Clemmer was named Unsung Hero. I would have voted for Paulie.
And I’m so sorry that Clemmer was named Unsung Hero. I would have voted for Paulie.
*Death glare* Not Paulie, Pando.
(Just kidding. Paulie’s actually a really good choice for it. Stupid Devils don’t even pay attention to how important he is to the team! :P)
Mike :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Clearly the only way it could have happened!
Mike I loved that. :)
“And I bet the team was STUNNED to have someone accepting the Unsung Hero award who DIDN’T claim that someone else deserved it. *Sniff, sniff* Poor Pando.”
:( I love Pando but I think Travis deserved the Unsung Hero award this year. Nobody ever seems to give the kid credit (other than people on here of course) that without him Zach would not have a lot of his points this year. Yes Zach would still have had a lot of goals but Travis set up a good amount of Zach’s goals and then Travis decided to be a beast on the PK (until recently). I think my Travis crush is becoming too big…Time to go burn some acorns to try to get it out of my head or whatever else I should to get the crush out.
Hey Amy, did you like that awesomely not awesome fight with Avery and Clutterbuck? I love how they neatly removed their helmets and gloves. Lame.
I agree Paulie would have been a great choice for the Unsung Hero too.
Wow, Thrashers tv has Komisarek in the penalty box with Latendresse’s name and number under him. Cause they’re similar in that they’re not the same size, one is defense, one is offense, and they don’t look a thing alike. (Don’t get cocky Blersus. At least they’re on the same team. Re: Paul Gaustad/Paul Martin.)
*Death glare* Not Paulie, Pando.
Did I say Paulie? I meant Pando.
I love how they neatly removed their helmets and gloves.
All they were missing were their whatevers-of-affairs to neatly hold their gloves and helmets, instead of carelessly flinging them around the ice.
Did I say Paulie? I meant Pando.
Thank you. That’s much better. :P
And KG, I’ve retired as the corrupt ruling priest class of PandoNation and have taken up in that role in TravisNation, so you’re preaching to the choir about his awesomeness. :D
All they were missing were their whatevers-of-affairs to neatly hold their gloves and helmets, instead of carelessly flinging them around the ice.
I picture Avery’s whatever-of-affair to be that snake from Disney’s “Robin Hood.” The advisor to Prince John
TravisNation? I love it. I wanna join. :p
I picture Avery’s whatever-of-affair to be that snake from Disney’s “Robin Hood.” The advisor to Prince John
That’s my all-time favorite Disney movie, and Pookie and I still, every single time one of us is waiting for the other one, do our “Sir Hiss inside the barrel of wine” impersonation. *Drunkenly* “Coming! Cooooooming!” (Avery’s not good enough for Sir Hiss.)
That’s my all-time favorite Disney movie, and Pookie and I still, every single time one of us is waiting for the other one, do our “Sir Hiss inside the barrel of wine” impersonation. *Drunkenly* “Coming! Cooooooming!” (Avery’s not good enough for Sir Hiss.)
That.Is.Awesome. Though Sleeping Beauty is my number one, Robin Hood is right behind it. (like tied for the same spot, but Robin Hood has a game on hand so Sleeping Beauty is ranked above it). Hood is literally foxy.
Yeeeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! They really are going to win the cup now!!!!!
Did you guys hear that apparently Zach gave gum to all of the players at their luncheon thing today?
What? Gum? Why? WTF?
I don’t remember Sleeping Beauty. But I’m willing to guess it doesn’t have the hilarity of elephants running through tents that I expect from my Disney movies!
Hood is literally foxy.
I refuse to believe that animated fox isn’t sexy! And I’m NOT a prevert for thinking that! :D
Zach gave all the guys gum? The hell? Travis probably gave them apples or pennies. He was like, “Well, that’s what I do at Halloween, so it seemed apt if you were giving out candy.”
Zach may have been going, “Thanks for your vote, here’s your gum.” Next guy. “Thanks for your vote, here’s your gum.”
And then each guy looks at the one next to him, “Did you vote for him?”
“No…Did you?”
“No…”
I refuse to believe that animated fox isn’t sexy! And I’m NOT a prevert for thinking that! :D
It’s not bestiality if he can talk!
It’s not bestiality if he can talk!
And with a British accent, no less! And he plays the lute!
It’s not bestiality if he can talk!
And sing! And shoot bullseyes!
Zach may have been going, “Thanks for your vote, here’s your gum.” Next guy. “Thanks for your vote, here’s your gum.”
He really IS Tracy Flick! (He had to give the gum to his teammates because Boxworthy doesn’t have teeth, so he can’t chew it.)
Of course B-Mo had to get his 500th point and the first goal for Dallas. Arrggggghhhh. The hockey gods are jerks.
Elephants running through tents is never not funny.
And with a British accent, no less! And he plays the lute!
And sing! And shoot bullseyes!
Which is so why Maid Marian picked him on match.com
I love that the Sabres Blersus commercial says nothing about being good, or going to the playoffs, or proving themselves. It talks about they’re hardcore fanbase. I don’t know whether to be proud or sad that the best thing Blersus can say about the Sabres is they have good fans.
I don’t know whether to be proud or sad that the best thing Blersus can say about the Sabres is they have good fans.
Well, it’s more than they’ve been able to say about the Devils, so I think that’s something you can hang your hat on. :D
You know what else is foxy? This effing game. This game is a lute playing, bullseye hitting, singing with a British accent stone cold fox in a green tunic.
WOOOOOOOOOO mcguffers, I totally agree! Finally a funny game to watch! I’m glad I stayed up to watch this period too…
This game is a lute playing, bullseye hitting, singing with a British accent stone cold fox in a green tunic.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: It’s the power of positive thinking!
Is it also elephants-running-through-tents awesome?
Well, it’s more than they’ve been able to say about the Devils, so I think that’s something you can hang your hat on. :D
HSBC is way too crowded to be hanging hats anywhere, so we don’t even have that!
Is it also elephants-running-through-tents awesome?
Yep! The habs are running through the thrashers, so the elephants and tents metaphor seems fitting!
Grrrreg!! I was hoping you’d get to see this! (cause frankly who’d believe it if you didn’t see it? )
Pookie, elephants everywhere! No tent is safe!!
Grrrreg!! I was hoping you’d get to see this! (cause frankly who’d believe it if you didn’t see it? )
I know! And yes, it’s only Atlanta, but I DON’T GIVE A DAMN, it’s just a good feeling! this game rocks!
Unfortunately I really have to go to sleep now, because it’s already past 2 AM, but I’m glad I saw this second period! I’ll sleep well…
Man, these Stars fans are really bringing the classy tonight. Booooo Danny Sedin when he`s down on the ice from a high stick that was double minor and then booooo his goal on the PP. HAHAHAHA.
*Patty and Myra obviously excluded
The Habs are making complete passes TO EACH OTHER. The Defense is clearing the puck. Price is making saves. Komisarek is hitting things. It’s a good night.
Oh, and my favorite quote: “Then Kovalchuk jumped on top of Komisarek.” And who could blame him ;)
g’night Grrrreg! And I’m telling myself that even though it’s Atlanta, we’d be beating the Bruins if it were them! (yes, I’m delusional.)
Man, these Stars fans are really bringing the classy tonight.
Heh. I love how behavior we all do as fans is an indicator of classlessness when someone else does it. :D
Heh. I love how behavior we all do as fans is an indicator of classlessness when someone else does it. :D
I dunno. I think I’d disown Western NY if we booed Santa. Just sayin.
You guys — they have Tim Hortons in Columbus! WHO KNEW???
I dunno. I think I’d disown Western NY if we booed Santa. Just sayin.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::: Anyone who doesn’t boo Santa is a sap. :P
Heh. I love how behavior we all do as fans is an indicator of classlessness when someone else does it. :D
I would NEVER do that! I kiss the Stars when we play them. HAHAHA.
I would NEVER do that! I kiss the Stars when we play them. HAHAHA.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
WOOOOOOOO! I wish we could always play the Stars! Our powerplay is 3 for 4!
*Sorry Patty Myra*
Anyone who doesn’t boo Santa is a sap. :P
Santa (making list): “And for Pookie, Zach in a bow. For alix, her very own taxi with extra large, uh, leg room in the back seat. For mcguffers, Goose or Komo? Goose or Komo? Aw, screw it. She deserves both! Schnookie. heh. How about a nice unsung hero. heh. Boo me. hahaha…”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
mcguffers, :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I wish we could always play the Stars! Our powerplay is 3 for 4!
It’s like playing the Devils! Sigh.
Dear god. Kesler got his head cut with a skate.
I. WANT. STEVE. OTT’s. HEAD. ON. A. PIKE!
I. WANT. STEVE. OTT’s. HEAD. ON. A. PIKE!
I hear that alot.
I forgot that the only bad part about beating the Thrashers is they become even more douchier. I know I used to like Boulton, but he’s a dick now.
I love this game. I wanna take this game behind the barn and make a man out of it.
alix, since Myra and Patty aren’t here, I’ll take this opportunity to say I agree wholeheartedly with you! I really think the refs should be giving him unsportsmanlikes every time he goads other guys into dropping the gloves without dropping them himself. I know he has a broken hand, but it’s still unsporstmanly; if he can’t walk the walk, he shouldn’t talk the talk.
Oh yeah, the Stars are being hardcore douchey tonight because they’re losing.
HAHAHAHA. Hordi just ran Turco when he was about 100 ft out of his net. This game is a gong show.
We flipped over to your game just in time, alix! Of course, given the number of pests on the Canucks roster, it’s kind of taking two to tango in this gong show, isn’t it? :P
alix, since Myra and Patty aren’t here, I’ll take this opportunity to say I agree wholeheartedly with you!
Thank you, Pookie!
Dear Razor,
I don’t think the words you’re using right now are the words you’re looking for.
Love,
Schnookie
Of course, given the number of pests on the Canucks roster, it’s kind of taking two to tango in this gong show, isn’t it? :P
Well Dallas has been starting everything! :P
Well Dallas has been starting everything! :P
Of course! I wasn’t suggesting otherwise. :P
The Edmonton Oilers feed always looks like it’s being done by a hockey dad at his 8 year old’s hockey game.
I love this game. I wanna take this game behind the barn and make a man out of it.
I somehow missed this! HAHAHAHA! Nice!
I kind of want to get my game cleaned up before I take it behind the barn…
Ott has, technically fought already tonight. More often than Hordichuck has.
I totally knew Patty would come to defend her Otter :D
….right before she jumped off the High Five.
Ott has, technically fought already tonight.
Yeah, yeah, but two weeks ago he wouldn’t have and you know it! :PPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
….right before she jumped off the High Five.
Don’t do it! Tomorrow’s going to be a beautiful day! AND your house is really clean right now! There’s a reason to live if ever there was one!
No, I’m gonna do it.
Even with your house so clean?
But you haven’t seen Nassau Coliseum yet!
Noooooooo! Don’t Patty! Ott’s a shithead but you have so much to live for! High draft pick this June! Bouche coming back in July! B-Mo’s cute little lisp!
But you haven’t seen Nassau Coliseum yet!
Wait for me, Patty — I’m jumping, too.
I kind of want to get my game cleaned up before I take it behind the barn…
:^::::::::::::::::::::: My game came over all showered wearing clean cargos and an ironed button down. My game will probably need to get cleaned up after I’m done with it.
B-Mo’s not really doing anything for me.
Laughing when Osgood gets lit up like a dirty ho in the playoffs!
Swedish meatballs!
Fabian’s hot ass!
Of course, given the number of pests on the Canucks roster, it’s kind of taking two to tango in this gong show, isn’t it? :P
Obviously.
Well Dallas has been starting everything! :P
Yeah, right. I guess Turco asked Hordi to take a run at him. Humph.
**picking up her marbles and going home**
And I saw what was said about Otter. :(
Ott’s one of the bright spots.
Psssssh. B-mo’s the only that’s scored for you! :P
B-Mo’s not really doing anything for me.
Well that’s not surprising…
And I saw what was said about Otter. :(
What can we say? “Petulant ice troll” isn’t really a universal language. :P
On the positive side, that douche rocket Avery and his team of every other NHL teams’ sloppy seconds beat Minnesota, and you guys are only 3 points out of a playoff spot.
and as I type that, Kessler scores. So now I feel like an asshole.
So, Patty, what you’re trying to tell me is that watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III was a better bet than watching this game?
I don’t think the words you’re using right now are the words you’re looking for.
That’s 95% of Razor’s vocab right there.
Color me shocked that Clemmensen won an award, period, let alone an unsung hero award.
Well……..
*Whispers* Turco was like 10 miles out of his net…
Anyways. Sorry ladies. I’m going to stop talking.
*Throws away the key to her mouth*
*Whispers* Turco was like 10 miles out of his net…
*Whispers back* He was. I wouldn’t like it if anyone hit Marty like that (not that Marty ever goes that far up the boards with incoming traffic), but hey. That’s hockey. :D
Don’t leave, Myra! As Boomer used to say of differing opinions when we were little, “that’s what makes a horse race”!
“that’s what makes a horse race”!
Oh my gosh! Tell Boomer I love her! Cutest expression ever!
I’m now calling this game the ex-Sabres vs the ex-Habs.
Doesn’t matter where you hit the goalie.
Doesn’t matter where you hit the goalie.
Technically speaking, it is legal outside the crease. I mean, yes, your team damn well BETTER rush to his defense, but it’s not illegal. :P
Doesn’t matter where you hit the goalie.
Sure it does!
Yup. I think goalies should be like any other player if they decide to go way out of their creases. Sorry. But I do.
Do I think it was a jerky move by Hordi? Yes. Heh.
Did I mention tonight when Little jumped on Price, Komo then jumped on Little, then Kovalchuk jumped on him. Creating a twister game that I would so love to jump in! Except Little. I wouldn’t want him putting his left hand anywhere near my red.
If it looks like I’m using humor to divert tensions, that’s totally not it. Ha ha. ha.ha. ha.
I wouldn’t want him putting his left hand anywhere near my red.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
You’re like Farmer Hoggett’s wife in “Babe” — “Anyone for cards?!”
I wouldn’t want him putting his left hand anywhere near my red.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
And yeah, I think Hordichuk deserved his charging penalty, but that’s just for the charge. Not for the fact that he hit Turco. :D
I think goalies should be like any other player if they decide to go way out of their creases.
That’s the nice thing about lacrosse. When i left my crease, I was just like any other player… except with 20 lbs of equipment. And I’m 5’10. So you coouuullld try to run me, but it wouldn’t have been a smart choice.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
That was to hand/red not you getting run, mcguffers!
You’re like Farmer Hoggett’s wife in “Babe” — “Anyone for cards?!”
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: My best friend teases me all the time because one time two of our other friends were joking but it was started to get kind of serious, so I popped in with, “Did you guys hear about that pairs figure skating judge? Apparently she was trying to rig the Olympics!” To this day, whenever there is tension in a room she’ll look at me and say, “Sooo, how ’bout those figure skating judges?”
That was to hand/red not you getting run, mcguffers!
Suuuuuure it was. You’re such a classless beeyotch! :P
Technically speaking, it is legal outside the crease.
Oh, I know. I didn’t say it was illegal. I guess I should have said, “It doesn’t matter to his teammates where you hit the goalie.”
I guess I should have said, “It doesn’t matter to his teammates where you hit the goalie.”
Well, yeah. That’s definitely true!
Awwww Hanky Panky! My team actually figured out how to score an empty netter!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Sorry Caitlin. Patty, Myra.
And yes, Schnookie. I am a classless beeyotch :P I like Hordichuk for Swede’s sake.
Oh, I know. I didn’t say it was illegal.
Sorry I misunderstood! @@@@
And sorry, Stars fans!
I guess I should have said, “It doesn’t matter to his teammates where you hit the goalie.”
Oh yeah. That makes sense. Big style.
@@@@@@@@@@@@
alix, hose that game down and get on that shit! Back of the barn’s free. Though if you find some boxer briefs, hand ’em back to Tanguay will ya? 5 point night for that sexy bitch!
alix, I really have no clue what’s happening in the game, I just thought I’d check in and see if Patty was doing okay. Since there’s talk of meeting up at the High Five…clearly not.
Patty, I have cookies for you. :( AND CAKE.
(And alcoholic beverages.)
alix, hose that game down and get on that shit! Back of the barn’s free.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: The Saskatoon Airport is clutching its pearls again. mcguffers. We never had problems with them before you started hanging around here! :P
We never had problems with them before you started hanging around here! :P
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: There is NO WAY I believe that statement to be true! It was not one of my comments that linked “Meatiest Pussy in the NHL” to you guys!
mcguffers, that game is already calling my name breathlessly!
Oh and :^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Caitlin, you`re probably glad you didn`t see it. And I`m really sorry. The Canucks went through this last season and it SUCKS. Many booze for you.
It was not one of my comments that linked “Meatiest Pussy in the NHL”
Yeah, but you were thinking it!
It was not one of my comments that linked “Meatiest Pussy in the NHL” to you guys!
Touche!
Hmph. Actually. That’s not true. I searched just to make sure that was the actual phrase, and, well, now it is my comment. When I was explaining how it linked to you guys. Sorry Saskatoon. I’ll stay on my side of the border. Oops.
I appreciate your effort to make amends, mcguggers. I think Saskatoon is never going to like us, no matter what we do. :P
And on that note, I’m going to go sleep healing sleep. I don’t want to have to go to the doctor tomorrow. Not because I’m afraid of finding out I have strep or anything, but because they weigh me every time I go in to the office. Sigh. I know I’m fat! And depressing me about it is only going to weaken my immune system and make me sicker! :P
mcguffers, I bet your picture is up in every border crossing!
And on that meatiest pussy in the NHL, I’m off to bed. That’s two nights in a row that I’ll be in bed before midnight! This week’s schedule has sucked! :D Goodnight, everyone!
Thanks for the cookies, Caitlin!
g’night ladies! I hope everything goes well at the doctor’s office Schnookie! And Pookie, can you check and see who the NHL’s meatiest pussy is while your at work? It’s killing me.
Patty, all your team owners have to do is threaten to sell the team. It apparently worked for the Canadiens.
No problem, Patty!
Patty, all your team owners have to do is threaten to sell the team.
Cool! Because that rumor’s been started!
“It doesn’t matter to his teammates where you hit the goalie.”
Exhibit A: Crunchy v. Gomez. I don’t care if Gomer didn’t intentionally break Crunchy, heads should have rolled just because Crunchy was touched by an opposing player. And don’t even get me started on the fact that none of the 20 other guys on the team even care about clearing the crease of opposing players.
So, how is everyone doing this morning?
Good morning, everyone! I stupidly decided I was well enough to come back to work today. Granted, yes I am well enough, but who voluntarily goes back to work? This was a grievous mistake on my part. :P
Yep Schnookie, I really don’t get you. This is a rookie mistake!
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Right, Grrrreg! I won’t let this happen again, I promise!
So how does it feel to be living in a brave new world of “Habs Are Going To Win The Cup”? :P
Victory feels weird, but it does taste good! I had completely forgotten what it was like!
Hey wait, I know what you’re doing here… You’re trying to fool the hockey gods into believing the habs are a juggernaut, just to distract their attention from the devils! Don’t listen to her, hockey gods! The devils are the good team, the habs still suck! Don’t punish us!
SHUT UP! Hockey Gods, don’t listen to him. He’s just another one of those arrogant Habs fans… :P
The devils are the good team, the habs still suck!
The Habs are winners! The Devils have dropped two in a row and can’t win on the road to save their lives!
Good morning All.
Wow. You really guys really hit the nail on the head with this one. I couldn’t agree more.
I don’t want to have to go to the doctor tomorrow. Not because I’m afraid of finding out I have strep or anything, but because they weigh me every time I go in to the office. Sigh. I know I’m fat! And depressing me about it is only going to weaken my immune system and make me sicker! :P
Wow, Schnookie, I just missed monday and tuesday with what I originally thought was Strep! Turns out it’s viral. (And no, they didn’t need to weigh me…yay!)
I just missed monday and tuesday with what I originally thought was Strep! Turns out it’s viral.
Ooh! I’m so sorry you were sick! After doing some research online (because that’s what any responsible person should do — self-diagnosis on the interwebs :P) I’ve decided what I have is viral, too. I’m totes going home early today, though.
I thought about not coming in today, but I think I’ve milked this thing enough. I got out of proctoring an exam (that was 9:40-11:00 PM! on Monday) and I got out of going to class yesterday.
I fully support your decision to leave early!
I kind of expected my inbox to be swamped with all kinds of panicky work-related stuff, but it turns out the only thing waiting for me this morning was a whole bunch of stupid Outlook emails. My boss was off-site yesterday and again today, so I was a DAMN FOOL for coming in! I’m glad you managed to get out of so much, though, Pam!
I don’t think the doctor ever weighs me when I go in because I’m sick. If you have to go you should just give them a hard time about that, Schnookie.
I originally felt bad about not helping out with the exam (technically, that’s part of my job as a TA), but then I was like “Fuck it, I’m sick!” I never get to stay home sick anymore, so I was seizing the opportunity!
Another thing I hate at the doctor is when they ask: “on a scale from 1 to 10, how bad does it hurt?”
“It’s a sore throat! What the hell difference does some arbitrary numerical value associated with it make? Everyone knows what a sore throat feels like.”
I went with 4.
The nurse then told me that men routinely say their pain is a 9 or 10, no matter what.
I proctor exams at work all the time but for some reason the distance learning places could care less if I’m actually watching the students take the tests. Basically, the schools are lucky if I even remember to take the students books from them. I get a big kick out of asking the students if they have graphing calculators in their purses when they’re taking tests like “Literature 101”. None of them ever laugh. Jerks.
The nurse then told me that men routinely say their pain is a 9 or 10, no matter what.
Hey, don’t say bad things about men, it hurts.
I’d say it hurts like a 9, on a 1 to 10 scale.
Pookie, I think that’s funny!
We go back and forth on allowing calculators, but we don’t allow cell phones. Recently, some of the students had cell phones which I guess could support PDFs, and they copied the answer directly from the solution mnaual onto the exam. Of course they got caught. How stupid are these kids? If you’re gonna cheat, don’t make it so obvious!
Grrreg, nicely done, +1
I’d say it hurts like a 9, on a 1 to 10 scale.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
One of my colleagues got to proctor a test for Gemology. How bizarre is that?
Gemology? I’d say “what is that?”, but I suppose it’s self explanatory!
Do you have to help them if they have questions? Who has a background in gemology around these parts to help out with such a thing?
All I know is that Jem is truly outrageous.
:^:::::::::::: to Jem!
Hey, don’t say bad things about men, it hurts.
I’d say it hurts like a 9, on a 1 to 10 scale.
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
And there’s no way around being weighed at my doctor’s office. I’ve complained in the past, and the nurses all proudly crow, “No one comes into this office without being weighed.” I’d say that hurts at about an 8, but that’s a lie. It’s more like a 3. But that might just be my X chromosomes talking.
(I would, in all seriousness, give my sore throat a 7.)
All I know is that Jem is truly outrageous.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
“on a scale from 1 to 10, how bad does it hurt?”
It’s the real world doctor office equivalent of “are you pregnant” that college health centers ask.
And if all goes well, Friday should be the day our long national nightmare ends. Crunchy will start for the Sabres against the Leafs. Yay!
For the rest of the day I will be singing in my head: “but we’re the misfits, our songs are better!”
WOO HOOOOOO! to the Crunchy news! That’s awesome!
Crunchy’s back on Friday? Sweet!
It’s the real world doctor office equivalent of “are you pregnant” that college health centers ask.
:^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I thought that was only mine! I was seriously going to answer one time “Yes, yes I am. My pregnancy gave me pink eye.”
All I know is that Jem is truly outrageous.
I heart Rio!
The one time I went to the NYU health center it was for a pre-study abroad checkup and the student doctor (or whatever I’m supposed to call her) actually told me I was boring.
And then the guy who weighed and measured me claimed I was 5′ 2″ which is so not true. Hmph.
Although it could be worse–my suitemate went there with a Plantar’s wart and had to see like 4 people before she got to the specialist who actually recognized it for what it was. And this after me and her roommate had looked and said, “oh, that’s a little Plantar’s wart. You’d better go and get it frozen off.” Needless to say, we were not filled with confidence about our health center after that.
And yay for Crunchy!
My doctor always weighs me, too. I hate that! After I had spent the week in bed with the flu, and had forced myself to eat a piece of bread each day, I had to go in for something else and my weigh-in was great! Then I had to come back for the follow-up test 2 weeks later and got a little clucking from the nurse. I’m like, that LAST one was wrong, not this one.
And WOO HOO! for Crunchy! Some good news!
I’d say it hurts like a 9, on a 1 to 10 scale.
the reason men always answer 9 or 10, is because anything less and we wouldnt even be going to the doctor.
if its an 8 or less we have household items like duct tape that can stem the bleeding, a few tylenol to dull the pain, and a couple more beers – and we’re good to go.
You guys, I just woke up from the world’s most restorative nap. Sleep must be good for you or something! I’m, like, fully recovered now! WOO HOOOO!
I can’t say I’ve got a lot of faith in the NYU student health center, either, based on your story, Meg. I went to the Rutgers one once. It was my very last day as a Rutgers student, taking my very last round of final exams, and I fell down a flight of stairs in the parking garage. I went to the health center to be assured by them that my ankle was merely badly sprained and not broken. And that’s my story.
I’d say the breakdown is like this:
1-3: dont even notice the pain
4-5: chuckle to yourself for hitting your own thumb with the hammer.
6-7: laugh with your friends about hitting your own thumb with the hammer. again.
8: laugh with your friends about hitting your own thumb with the hammer. and drawing blood. again.
9-10: laugh until you realize you cant stop the blood and you’ll need professional help. hope you dont bleed all over the car. look forward to getting home and laughing with your friends while showing off the stitches.
11: death.
(my pain scale goes to 11)
KenF, :^:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I like that humiliation seems to also be a factor in your pain scale. That’s an important contributing element. For me it’s often like, “My pain WOULD be a 3, but everyone SAW me fall down that flight of stairs, so I’m going to go with… 200. It’s a 200 out of 10. It’s pain unlike any human being has ever experienced before.”
I never know what to do with the pain scale either. I kind of figure if my ankle hurts so badly I can’t walk, that’s probably like a 5, right? Unless I try to put pressure on it and it goes up to, say, a seven?
And when it comes to injuries if it’s really severe your probably in shock, so I don’t know how you pain scale that . . .
And when it comes to injuries if it’s really severe your probably in shock, so I don’t know how you pain scale that . .
At that point, the smiley/frowny face pain chart gets thrown out the window, I think.
Yeah, the pain scale is very fraught. Looking at the smiley/frowny faces that go with them and all, I always kind of figure that if I haven’t passed out from the pain, it can’t be more than an 8, right? And I cry really easily, so the fact that it’s drawing tears doesn’t automatically mean my pain’s severe, right? I think I undersell my pain.
At that point, the smiley/frowny face pain chart gets thrown out the window, I think.
Yeah, like if you are missing one leg, I think they just assume you’re in great pain.
Good afternoon, everyone! Isn’t hockey grand?
My pain scale usually involves how many bad words I say at once.
Yeah, like if you are missing one leg, I think they just assume you’re in great pain.
I learned coming out of surgery at my local hospital that if you don’t come right out and say your pain’s a 10, they don’t assume anything. I’m not sure I’d want to test this “missing a leg” theory there. :P
When I’m asked about the pain scale, I tend to start at a number that sounds reasonable and then talk myself down thinking that surely other people in far greater distress than I’ve even seen have felt worse. And usually the time I spend thinking about how much worse my pain could be serves to get my mind off my pain and it hurts less.
like my lovely wonderful nuturing mother used to say, “quit your bitching, theres some kid in china that lost more toes in a freak hay-baler accident too, but he’s hungry, you dont hear him crying”
Oh Pookie and her dumb “people elsewhere in the world are hurting more than me right now” mentality. Pfft. :P
I didn’t mean that in a sanctimonious way! I just meant that I hate wasting the doctor’s time and I wouldn’t want to say “6” and then have them laugh and say, “No, we know it’s a 3, loser!”
“quit your bitching, theres some kid in china that lost more toes in a freak hay-baler accident too, but he’s hungry, you dont hear him crying”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: It’s like the old Doonesbury from around the time Nixon visited China, where there’s a diplomatic dinner and one of the dignitaries has brought his young son with him. And the son is whining that he doesn’t want to eat his jellied duck web, so the father is all, “Quit your whining! There are starving children in West Virginia who would give anything for your jellied duck web right now!”
Ahhh the old “There’s starving kids! line” My brother used to say why don’t you just send my food to them then, mum?
Poor little Ryan Kesler is getting reamed out by the NHLPA by daring to say he would probably take a hometown discount so the Canucks could stay together and keep winning.
The NHLPA used to rail against Marty’s contracts all the time, too.
I wouldn’t want to say “6″ and then have them laugh and say, “No, we know it’s a 3, loser!”
Ahahah! Then, the scale becomes a perverse trick question, you’re just trying to guess the correct answer by looking at the reaction of the doctor. “uh… I don’t know… I want to say 6. Is that right? Is this even possible? Am I a wuss if I say 6?”
But I’ve actually never been asked the question. Our doctors are way more old school. They’re like: “of course you’re in pain, you wouldn’t be here otherwise. Just shut up and take some aspirin!”
“Quit your whining! There are starving children in West Virginia who would give anything for your jellied duck web right now!”
A classic incident in our family was one day when my mom was telling one of my stubborn sisters to eat her black-eyed peas and the other one said, “Think of all the poor blind children in China!”
The NHLPA used to rail against Marty’s contracts all the time, too.
They’ve lectured Jere Lehtinen a few times, too.
The NHLPA used to rail against Marty’s contracts all the time, too.
I still think the NHLPA locked Soupy’s bits in a vault in Toronto last season.
And heaven forbid a player realize that the name on the front of the jersey is more important than the name on the back. If a player is content where they are, let them be.
Exactly, Amy! In fact, I believe those were Lehtinen’s exact (translated) words.
I get where the PA is coming from, but they really do end up making the guy taking a hometown discount look that much awesomer, don’t they?
“Think of all the poor blind children in China!”
:^::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
When I broke my ankle, I sat on a gurney, in the fetal position, in tears, in such a fog that I couldn’t remember my own phone number, with MY TOES POINTING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION and the nurse still very nonchalantly asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how much does it hurt?” My response of “GOOOOOOOOD, OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!” finally seemed to break through.
(I had to look up Mark’s work number in the phone book so I could call him. I’m lucky I remembered my own name that day.)
Oh, my gosh, Heather! That’s giving me chills.
I would not have handled it even that well.
Dude, Heather, that’s RIDONK that the nurse asked. I mean, I realize they have extensive training, and have to be able to go through their routines and everything, but still. Heh. That’s pretty hilarious. (In hindsight.)
My big pain experience, in my post-gall bladder surgery debacle, involved the world’s most incompetent nurse repeatedly FORGETTING TO GIVE ME PAINKILLERS as he stumbled through the process of setting me up in my in-patient room, DESPITE THE FACT THAT IT WAS OUT-PATIENT SURGERY. Man, those were good times. :P
Heather, I can’t believe the nurse asked you that! Are you sure it was a nurse and not Count Rugen from “Princess Bride”? “Remember, Heather, this is for academic research, so do consider your answer careful. It will be saved for all posterity.”
My big pain experience, in my post-gall bladder surgery debacle, involved the world’s most incompetent nurse repeatedly FORGETTING TO GIVE ME PAINKILLERS as he stumbled through the process of setting me up in my in-patient room, DESPITE THE FACT THAT IT WAS OUT-PATIENT SURGERY.
Wow, that’s competency right there.
When I was in the ER, they gave me the pain meds and the anti-nausea meds at the same time in my IV. It’s a good thing I was already somewhat lying down on a gurney, as I would have been a pile on the floor. The drugs were that good and that quick.
It’s a good thing I was already somewhat lying down on a gurney, as I would have been a pile on the floor. The drugs were that good and that quick.
Ooh, nice! That sounds WAY better than my pain med story! :D
Oh my goodness, did you guys watch the video of Zach getting his award? They take it back from him at the end. :p
You know, I can’t even think of a Sabre who deserves unsung hero this season. I think *I* deserve it more.
They should give you a stalk of wheat, Heather! A solid gold stalk of wheat!
Heather, I think you deserve Unsung Hero more than any other Sabre, too. Heh.
And I have to whine — my sore throat is now turning into a cold. THE FUCK? I mean, I spend two miserable days thinking I have strep, and only now, when I think I’m getting better, I get that “my head is filled with cotton balls made out of cement” cold feeling? Thanks for NOTHING, Gods of Sickness.
Oh did you see the video of Malkin cooking with Larionov’s daughter? It was featured on puckdaddy. Great stuff. They’re totally flirting, it’s really funny. And I love how Kris Letang randomly appears at the end, just to eat, and almost doesn’t say a word.
Oh, wordpress just ate my comment! I was talking about that video of Malkin cooking with Larionov’s daughter. It was featured on puckdaddy. They are totally flirting on it, so it’s quite funny. And I love how Letang just randomly arrives at the end, just to eat what they’ve cooked, and he almost doesn’t say a single word.
Stupid wordpress, of course now the first comment appears and I look stupid!
Pando got shafted for sure. No doubt about it!!!