Just before the start of this season we had big plans to invent a champagne cocktail that incorporates a Chuckles candy in honor of the bright Kovalchuk future of the Devils. We were going to style it all fancy, with a vast, Sandra Lee-esque tablescape in shades of red and black. And then we got distracted by something shiny, wandered off, and never did it. Perhaps the Hockey Gods intervened without our knowing it, though, because it seems far more apt to look beyond just the champagne drink and instead review the entirety of the still-young season in cocktail form.
Fill a shaker with ice. Add 2 oz. vodka, 2 oz. cranberry juice, and 3/4 oz. cointreau, and shake well. Strain into a cocktail glass and add a black Chuckle.
The Sudsy Chuckle
Angrily pour a can of beer into a beer mug, creating as much unnecessary foam as possible. Drink the beer. Garnish the dregs with a green Chuckle.
To a plastic patio glass add one yellow Chuckle. Top with plain, unflavored seltzer.
The Cat’s Pajamas
Fill your pet cat’s bowl with tap water and set aside. When the cat has naturally added chewed-up mice to the bowl, float an orange Chuckle.
The Shallow Grave
Find a secluded patch of dirt and dig a small hole. Drop a red Chuckle into the hole and cover lightly with dirt.