As I sat at my laptop in my Gucci track suit and Manolo sneakers, I couldn’t help but wonder if Henrik Lundqvist would look cuter without that stupid little white golfer’s glove he wears under his goalie glove. It’s probably filled with vaseline. I couldn’t help but think “ew”.
Byline: Ookie Bradshaw
[Cue bus splashing gutter water all over Ookie Bradshaw’s bedazzled Mrs. Lamoreillo jersey]