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Archive for the ‘Musical!’ Category

Thanks to the triple-whammy of the Devils playing as late as they did last season, Assassin’s Creed III being released at the end October, and the discovery that “The Voice” does a decent job (in a junk-food kinda way) of filling the “competitive but mostly low-key and fun” role of early-season games, we’ve managed to do a pretty good job of being chill about the fact that there’s no hockey on our TVs. One thing the lock-out has let us do is focus more energies on finding and listening to new (and new-to-us) music; another thing it’s let us do is not see the same NY Kicks commercials a thousand times a night on MSG. So yeah, we’re chill.

Or rather we were! There’s only two reasons why seeing the same NY Knicks commercials a thousand times a night wouldn’t be a pain worse than death. One would be if the commercial started with some dorky dude shouting “We’re baaaaaaallin’!” We’ve never made any bones about how here at stately IPB Manor, the phrase “we’re ballin'” is guaranteed to get more than a snicker from us every single time. That commercial aired years ago, and yet it’s still a source of much amusement for us. We’re very sophisticated.

The other reason would be if the commercial was set to one of our favorite songs:

So what MSG is saying is that right now, if only the NHL and NHLPA could play a little nicer with each other, we could be watching competitive-but-mostly-low-key hockey and listening to good music? At the same time?! A thousand times a night, every night?!? Alright, now we’re pissed at this stupid lockout!

But… we’ll worry about it after this next mission in Assassin’s Creed III.

P.S. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

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Katebits and Heather have genius bits — their most recent discovery is that there are shocking parallels between the Sabres and the “Sound Of Music”. This got us wondering about whether there was a Nazi-themed musical that applies to the Devils; surely the Sabres aren’t the only ones. After much consideration of the many, many Nazi-themed musicals we’re familiar with, we realized that Sabres fans are not, indeed, the only lucky ones. Because the Devils? Are all “Cabaret”, baby!

First of all, like the proposal Katebits and Heather made to use “Climb Every Mountain” as the new Sabres goal song, the Devils could get their own signature goal song this way as well. How about “Cabaret”?

Right now goals scored at The Rawk are followed by the fans “Hey”ing along with whatever it is the PA system blares (we can’t remember — did they end up caving on their principles and stepping off the “Gary Glitter is a pedophile” refusal of “Rock and Roll Part 2”?). But if we went with “Cabaret”, everyone would get to leap to their feet not just in joyous celebration of a goal, but also in the irresistible urge to belt along with Liza. Seriously, what good is sitting alone in your room when you could be cheering along with a whole Rawkful of other Devils fans? Life is a cabaret old friend indeed!

But this connection between team and Nazi-themed musical runs deeper than just the raddest goal song ever. Think about it. Who do Sally and the MC remind you of in this number?

It’s Kovalchuk (Sally) and Lou (the MC)! It’s been staring us in the face all along! Who’s that knocking on the window? Gasp! Salary Cap!

Now that we’ve blown your mind with the obvious MC/Lou thing, it’s time to imagine Lou’s take on “Wilkommen”. At first we thought his version would be just, “Welcome,” and nothing else. But then we found this version:

Wow. It makes even more sense now, if that’s even possible. There’s his orchestra analogy! And the team does dog it! And many of the players are beautiful, assuming you have low standards!

Anyway, perhaps the most exciting thing about this discovery about our team is that we can take this one step further: if Kovalchuk is Sally, and Lou is the MC… then someone has to be the Nazis. But who? Who can it be?

Why, it’s Gary Bettman! Yep, we finally, after over three years of blogging, have made the moronic Bettman-is-Hitler connection. Today we earned our blogger stripes. Cue “Cabaret”!

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